Diplomatic Complications
or
No Children Allowed
It all started with a message he got one night. "Hello, Hikaru? This is Shalo, you know, your sister-in-law? Something's come up, and I really need you to take Natasha for a couple of weeks. There's just no one else I trust who can take care of her for me. Would you please call me back?"
Sulu sighed. There was no way he could take care of his niece, not for a couple of weeks. A couple of days might have been possible, but a couple of weeks? No. Not now, now he was needed on the Enterprise. He'd just have to call Shalo and tell her he couldn't do it.
Was it too late to call her now? Looking at the clock on the wall of his quarters, he saw that it would be eleven twenty-three on earth. She would be asleep - at least he hoped so - by now. It would have to be tomorrow.
But all that night, he kept thinking about it. Was there some way he could…? No, no it would never be allowed. But he could at least ask Kirk about… but surely it wouldn't work. Not now, not when the Enterprise was in the middle of a very important diplomatic mission to the Romulan ambassador. It simply couldn't be done. He'd have to tell his sister-in-law no.
So the next morning, he called her on his private communicator. "Shalo," he said after they had exchanged warm greetings, "I'm sorry, but there's no way at all. I've thought about it all night, and I can't get back to earth right now."
"I understand that… but Hikaru, couldn't you maybe take her with you?"
"Why do you need someone to watch her, anyway?"
"My boss is sending me on a very important teaching assignment, and there are no children allowed. We really need the money since…"
"I know," he sighed. "But there are no children allowed aboard Federation starships either."
"I know that, but from what I've heard about Captain Kirk, I thought…"
Sulu couldn't help laughing. "I will ask him if you insist, but I cannot promise anything. We're in the middle of something very important."
"Oh, Natasha is very well behaved, and I'm sure that…"
"I know, Shalo, but isn't she only two years old?"
"Heavens, no. She's seven."
"It's been that long? Well, seven, two, it's all the same aboard a starship until you reach about twenty-one."
"But you'll ask?"
"I'll ask."
This was why Sulu found himself in the captain's quarters the next afternoon, facing Kirk and nervously clearing his throat.
"Well, what is it, Sulu? We have a job to do, and we don't want to lose more time than necessary."
"I know sir. I just have a request."
"Well, what is it?"
"I was wondering if my niece could visit for a couple weeks."
He couldn't believe he'd just out and said that. Kirk stared at him.
"Your niece, Mr. Sulu? I didn't know you had a niece."
"I haven't seen her in some time."
"Well this is highly irregular… how old is she, Mr. Sulu? Is she a teenager?"
"No sir." Sulu knew this was misleading, but he didn't really care that much. His brother's child would not cause trouble, no matter what her age, he had convinced himself.
"I don't know… I suppose as long as she keeps mostly to herself it will be fine. But you will be in charge of her, Sulu. You'll have to be the one to make sure she is alright and doesn't cause trouble."
"I will, I will sir. Thank you." Sulu warmly shook the Captain's hand. "You have nothing to worry about."
He was glad to be able to call Shalo and give her an affirmative answer. "When can she beam aboard?" was the eagerly asked question in response to his news.
"Right away. I'll go down now and ask Scotty to energize transporter beams before we get too far away from earth."
"Thank you Hikaru. I know if your brother were alive…"
"I know. You're quite welcome. But no more than ten days, Shalo, after that I don't know what we'll be doing and I can't…"
"Oh, don't worry, ten days will be plenty of time. I know you'll watch out for her."
"I will. Good luck."
It only took moments for Sulu to get down to engineering. "Scotty, please energize transporter beams."
"Energize transporters? Why?"
It annoyed Sulu, who didn't think that Scotty needed to know, but he answered, "My niece is beaming in to have me look after her for a few days."
"Your niece? I didn't know you had a niece, laddie."
"Well, I do. Would you please energize so she can beam up?"
"Well, but this is quite unusual…"
"Captain Kirk's orders, Mr. Scott." Sulu was tired of having to explain it.
"Well, that's alright then."
Scotty energized transporters, got Natasha's coordinates from Sulu, and began to beam the child up. Suddenly, Sulu was nervous. Shalo said she'd never beamed before, would she be afraid? Would she move away and possibly be hurt - or worse - in the process? Or if she was alright, would she be upset and traumatized when she arrived? He was getting more and more apprehensive as the beam began to work.
He needn't have worried. In no time at all, a little girl with a doll under one arm materialized on the transporter pad and bounced off into Sulu's arms. "You're Uncle Hikaru, right?" she began to chirp happily. "You look just like Daddy's picture. It's so cool to be here. I like your uniform. Can I have a uniform while I'm here? Look, Mary has a uniform." She held up her doll proudly, and Sulu saw that it was indeed fitted out with a miniature replica of a Starfleet uniform.
"I see," he said, too surprised to say anything else. He'd expected her to be quiet and reserved like her mother, but this peppy child was his little brother all over again. It made him feel slightly lonely to think about it.
"Can I? Can I, Uncle Hikaru?"
"Can you what?" He was aware that Scotty was chuckling over by the transporter controls, and it was a bit embarrassing.
"Can I have a uniform while I'm here?"
He took her hand in his. "Maybe."
"Does maybe mean yes or no, Uncle Hikaru?"
Scotty was laughing openly now.
"It means we'll see. I don't know if we have any on board that will fit you." Turning towards Scotty, he said, "This is Natasha, my niece."
"How do you do, lassie?" The engineer extended his hand with a friendly smile.
Natasha shook it firmly, and began babbling on again. "I like your mustache, it's nice. You're kindof fat. Do you work here? What's your name?"
Sulu felt his cheeks grow warm, but Scotty only chuckled again, good-naturedly.
"Montgomery Scott, chief engineering officer, at your service, m'lady. It's not often that we have such lovely ladies aboard the Enterprise."
"Oh, I'm not a lovely lady, I'm a little girl," was her matter-of-fact response. "You talk funny."
"Ah yes, that's because I'm Scottish."
"What's sottish?"
"We need to be going now, Natasha," Sulu spoke up quickly, while Scotty tried to hide his amused smile. "Mr. Scott has work to do."
"Goodbye, Mr. Scott," nodded Natasha brightly, tucking her doll under her arm again. "I hope to see you again sometime. I like you."
"I like you too, lassie."
"Actually, my name is Natasha."
"Come on, Natasha," Sulu insisted, pulling her out of the room, leaving Scotty to laugh to himself.
"Natasha," he said in a low voice after they entered the corridors, "you shouldn't say people are fat, it's not nice."
"Alright, Uncle Hikaru, I won't. Oh look, there's a nice-looking man!"
She stopped and extended her hand, and Sulu groaned as he saw Commander Chekov standing before them. He'd hoped to get the little girl safely to his quarters before anyone else could ask about her.
"Vell, hello there, ma'am," Chekov smiled in his thick, Russian accent. "And vhat do ve have here?"
"I'm Natasha. That's my Uncle Hikaru. You talk even funnier than the last one. Are you sottish too?"
Chekov looked curiously up at Sulu, his brown eyes twinkling.
"This is my niece, Natasha," Sulu muttered, feeling more embarrassed by the minute. "Natasha, this is Commander Pavel Chekov."
"Hello, Mr. Chekov. Why do you talk so funny?"
"I'm from Russia, Miss Natasha."
"Oh, yes, I've heard of Russia. That's the biggest place in the world. Is everything really big there?"
Chekov was beaming at the little girl. "Not everything."
"Oh, of course. You're not nearly as big as my Uncle Hikaru, and he's not from Russia."
Sulu gripped her hand tighter as Chekov laughed. "We need to go now, Natasha."
"We have to go now, Mr. Chekov. If I'm ever in Russia, I'll be sure to visit you, if you're there of course. If you're in space like you are now, then it won't make any difference if I go to Russia or not. But I still want to go there sometime of course…"
"We're going now." Sulu began pulling her down the hallway. "See you later, Chekov."
Chekov nodded, clearly fighting back the urge to laugh out loud.
"Where are we going, Uncle Hikaru? Are we going to see if there are any uniforms that fit me now?"
"What? No, we're going…"
A voice came over the loudspeakers. "Commander Sulu, Commander Sulu, please report to the bridge immediately. Please report to the bridge immediately."
Sulu groaned again. The last thing he wanted to do was take his little niece up to the bridge for all his friends to see, and become the laughingstock of the entire crew. But it said immediately, and he couldn't leave Natasha to find her own way to his quarters.
"Uncle Hikaru, that's you," she informed helpfully.
"Yes I know," he sighed. "Let's go."
She jabbered all the way down the corridors and all the way along the turbolift. "This is a big place, Uncle Hikaru. How long have you worked here? Is that Mr. Chekov man related to you? You both have black hair. I have black hair too. Don't you think black hair is the best? Why is there a gold shirt under your uniform jacket? I saw that the Mr. Chekov man had a blue shirt, and the Mr. Scott man had an orange one. That's funny. Can I have a pink one with my uniform? Mary doesn't have one. I think she needs one. What color should she have, Uncle Hikaru? What bridge are we going to? Is it like the Golden Gate Bridge? I've been there before. I like it. Have you been there? It's red, you know, like your jacket. I like red. Mary likes red too…"
Sulu didn't know how much more of it he could take. Shortly before the turbolift reached the bridge, he interrupted her to say, "Natasha, we're going to the place where they control the ship. That's where I work, okay?"
"Oh yes, Mommy told me that you steer the ship. That's cool. Is it harder than steering a car?"
"Yes. Now there are a lot of people working very hard up there, and you can't talk too much to them. They need to concentrate."
"Oh you mean be quiet? I know how to be quiet."
There was a brief moment of silence.
"See?"
"Yes, yes I see. That's good. See if you can do that the whole time we're on the bridge."
"Okay, I will, Uncle Hikaru." The child clamped her mouth shut and smiled up at him, her dark eyes confident. For the first time, he smiled back, and the warmth and innocence of her childish, trusting look crept into him and made him miss his brother once again.
But the next moment they were arriving on the bridge, and Sulu had to run to the helm. "What is it, Captain?"
Kirk's back was to them. "Approaching a wormhole, Mr. Sulu. We'll need you to maneuver around it before we can go into warp speed." He turned his chair to face them. "Please…" he stopped short as his eyes fell on the smiling Natasha, who was still holding tight to Sulu's hand. "Well who is this?"
"This is my niece, Captain, Natasha Sulu. You remember I asked you about having her aboard…"
"Well yes, but I thought you said she was in her twenties."
Sulu squirmed, and he felt Natasha's hand quiver as if she were holding back a laugh. "No sir, I said she was not in her teens."
Kirk sighed and shook his head. "I should have guessed. Well, it's too late now, but see that you watch after her, Mr. Sulu. To the helm, please."
Natasha's mouth was still shut into a firm line, but she smiled at Kirk, who smiled back as Sulu led her to the helm. He sat down and told her to sit on the floor beside him, which she did. He felt all eyes on him as he sat there, and his cheeks grew warm again.
She was still staring at Kirk admiringly, he saw, but he didn't have time to reprimand her - he was busy trying to work out the best course to get around the wormhole.
"How do you like being on the Enterprise, Natasha?" Kirk asked kindly.
Natasha opened her mouth to answer, but then shut it tight again and looked up at Sulu.
"Is she mute, Mr. Sulu?" Kirk's amused voice asked. Sulu sighed.
"You can speak, Natasha. Answer Mr. Kirk."
It was as though he had released a surge of water. "Oh, so you're Captain Kirk? I've heard my mommy talk about you. I like this ship, it's nice. Can I have a Starfleet uniform while I'm here? My uncle said maybe. What's a wormhole? Is it a hole with worms in it? I didn't know there were any worms in space. Do you use them to go fishing? Sometimes my daddy took me fishing while he was still alive. Do you like being a Captain? You look like a Captain. And you don't talk funny like the other ones. I guess you're not sottish or from Russia. Where are you from? Are you from San Francisco like me and my mommy and my uncle?"
Kirk looked as though he were trying to figure out which of the outpouring of questions needed to be answered first. Out of the corner of his eye, Sulu saw Uhura smile as though she wanted to laugh.
"Natasha," he said quietly, trying to focus on maneuvering at the same time. "There's something between not talking at all and talking non-stop. Just answer Captain Kirk's questions, and then be quiet."
"Okay." She smiled at Kirk again.
"Quite a talkative niece you have, Mr. Sulu," Kirk chuckled.
"Yes, isn't she." He looked around to the science station and saw that even Spock wore a half-smile. His niece was quite a charmer.
"Well, it looks like we're out of the way of the wormhole. Let's try warp five, and then you may go get your niece settled in."
"Thank you sir." After obeying the order, Sulu took Natasha's hand again and began to lead her from the bridge. When they reached Spock's station, Natasha planted herself there and spoke.
"Who are you? You have funny ears and funny eyebrows."
Sulu groaned once more, and looked around to see a glance of amusement shared between Kirk and Uhura. Spock looked evenly at the child.
"I am a Vulcan. Vulcans have ears and eyebrows like this."
"What's a Vulcan?"
Sulu pulled on her hand. "I'll explain it later, Natasha. Come on."
"Goodbye, Mr. Vulcan," she smiled. "I'll see you later, I hope."
"My name is Spock. May you live long and prosper."
"Thanks, you too."
"Natasha," Sulu whispered, "come on."
She happily followed him into the turbolift. "I like it here, Uncle Hikaru."
"I'm glad, but you must learn when to speak and when to be silent."
"I'll try. Will you teach me?"
He signed for the severalth time. "Yes, Natasha, I'll teach you."
"Oh good." With a happy little wiggle, she squeezed his hand and rode the rest of the way in silence, looking curiously and alertly at everything.
When they reached his quarters, he sat her on the bed and gave her a digital picture frame to look at. "Here, you can look at these pictures until I come back."
"But I want to go with you. Are you going back up to the bridge? I want to talk to that Spock person again."
"Not right now. Maybe later, okay? You just stay here and be a good girl."
"I will. Can I go with you later?"
"Sure." He was trying to escape out the door.
"Promise?"
"Yes, yes, I promise. Later."
"Okay." She settled herself happily down and set her doll beside her. "Mary and I will look at these pictures."
At last he made it out into the corridors and closed the door behind him, breathing out heavily. He had a feeling that he'd gotten himself in for way more than he'd bargained for.
He rather dreaded going back up to the bridge, but there was nothing for it - he was needed up there. So he went.
No one said anything to him at first, and he tried to walk inconspicuously to the helm. It wasn't until he'd been sitting there for a few minutes, that Kirk asked, "What did you do with the girl?"
"I put her in my quarters, sir. She'll be fine."
"I hope so."
"I didn't know you had a niece, Mr. Sulu," Uhura said with interest. Sulu sighed. Why did everyone have to say that? And what was he expected to say back?
He finally settled on, "Yes, she's my brother's child."
"I didn't know you had a brother," came from Chekov, who was now at the weapons console on the other side of the bridge.
"I don't anymore."
There was a rather awkward silence, then Spock called, "Ship approaching, Captain."
"What kind of ship?"
"Romulan. A diplomatic vessel."
"Uhura…" Kirk began, but she was already contacting the vessel.
"Sir," Chekov called out, "the wessel is wery close now. Closing to fifty meters. Should ve raise our shields?"
"No, take no action, Chekov. Perhaps our transmission was misunderstood, and they thought they were to come to us. Uhura?"
"Captain, I'm getting something strange on the com channels… Sulu's communicator is transmitting here. It's blocking out Romulan transmission."
"Mine?" Surprised, Sulu moved his hand to his pocket to check for his communicator. "Captain, I think I left it in my quarters."
"Try to shut it off, Uhura."
The communications officer put her finger on the console, but then stopped short. A half-smile formed on her face. "On speakers, Captain."
"What…?"
A childish voice was heard. "Uncle Hikaru? Are you there? I found this radio thingy on your desk, and thought maybe I could call you with it. I'm done looking at all those pictures, is it later now? I want to come talk to that Spock man some more. Can I come with you? Hello? Are you there?"
Kirk was not amused this time. "Mr. Sulu…"
Sulu punched the communicator button in front of him. "Natasha, turn that off right now. I'll be right there."
"Sorry, Uncle."
"It's off now," Uhura announced.
"Contact Romulan vessel and apologize," was Kirk's quick order. "Mr. Sulu, please keep your niece away from communicators."
"I will. I'm sorry sir," he mumbled, making his way quickly into the turbolift again. She hadn't meant to do it, he knew, so he knew he couldn't be too upset with her when he got there, but it had been a problem. He knew she wouldn't do anything he told her not to do, but there were simply too many things one must not do on a starship - he couldn't possibly tell her all of them. There was only one thing to do - inconvenient or not, he must keep her with him.
When he got to his quarters, he walked in expecting to see her sitting on the bed with her doll as he'd left her. To his great surprise, the doll sat there alone, grinning up at him in its tiny Starfleet uniform. Where was Natasha now?
"Natasha?" he called, looking around the small room. The light was on under the bathroom door - "Natasha?" he called again, starting to open the door.
"Don't come in!" squealed Natasha's little voice. "Don't come in, Uncle, I'm in my underwear!"
He slammed the door shut. Putting his mouth to the crack, he called, "What are you doing in there? Why aren't you dressed?"
"I just walked in to look around, and I stepped in this little box thing. I didn't know it was a shower, Uncle Hikaru. It turned on and got me all soaked, all the way. All my clothes got wet except…"
"Never mind what didn't get wet," he said quickly. "Where are your clothes?"
"I left them in the shower. Can I have a uniform now, Uncle?"
He thought about what to do. "Natasha, just a minute. I'll go find you some clothes." Rushing to his closet, he pulled out one of his short-sleeved turtlenecks. Would it be long enough? Well, she'd just have to try it on and see.
Opening the door a crack, he pushed the shirt through. "Here you go, Natasha, try this on."
Her little hand grasped it and yanked it through. "This is too big for me, Uncle."
"I know it is, but just pretend it's a dress," he said desperately. Why had he left her alone - he didn't know how to deal with little girls at all.
"Okay," she giggled. "Can Mary have a dress like this too?"
"No," he said firmly. "Now Natasha, you must not touch anything unless you're told that you can. Don't touch my communicator again."
"I won't. I'm sorry, Uncle. And I'm sorry about your toothbrush too."
"My toothbrush? What happened to my toothbrush?"
"I was just looking around and I accidentally knocked it into the toilet. I'm sorry, Uncle, I didn't mean to. Do you want to use mine? Or I could buy you another one…"
Sulu groaned as she continued on. "No, no, I'll just get another one myself, thank you. But please be more careful."
"Okay." She opened the door and skipped out, the bottom of the gold turtleneck dangling about an inch below her knees. "How does this look?"
"Nice, Natasha, nice." He wasn't paying too much attention to how she looked just now - he was busy trying to figure out what to do with her. It was obvious that she couldn't be left alone - she was just too energetic.
"Uncle, can I have something to eat? I'm hungry."
He looked over and was about to tell her to be quiet, but the words were arrested on his lips as his brother's eyes stared up at him out of the little, round face. He missed his brother so much, he thought wistfully. His brother used to look at him the very same way when he wanted something, and he'd never been able to resist it. Again, he sighed.
"Alright, Natasha. Let's get something to eat."
She smiled, then sneezed as she took his hand.
Oh dear, was the child catching a cold? He should have thought to tell her to dry her hair right away. "Do you feel alright?"
"I feel fine, just a little sneezy. I don't like feeling sneezy, do you, Uncle? It's really bad when you need to sneeze and you can't, does that ever happen to you? It happens to me a lot. One time my friend Analisa needed to sneeze and she couldn't, and so she smelled some pepper and it made her sneeze, but then she couldn't stop sneezing for a week. I don't think that was a very good idea, do you, Uncle Hikaru? I don't think I'm going to try that…"
Of course she was probably fine, but he'd feel more comfortable if he could have Doctor McCoy take a quick look at her, just in case. He'd promised Shalo he would look after her, and what if she were to catch pneumonia or some other illness while on the Enterprise? That wouldn't do at all.
With this in mind, he began leading her down to sick bay. She chattered incessantly.
"I don't even like pepper. Do you like pepper, Uncle? Actually, it's okay on potatoes, but nothing else. Can we have potatoes for dinner? When can I talk to that Spock man again? Can I talk to him at dinner? I like everybody here, I like the Mr. Scott man, and Mr. Chekov, and I like Captain Kirk the most, except you, Uncle, I like you the mostest, because you're my uncle. Who was that black lady on the bridge? Is she your friend too? She's pretty. I like her. Where are we going now, Uncle? Are we going to eat now? I'm hungry. Are you hungry?"
She paused to take a breath here, and Sulu took the opportunity to say, "Yes, I'm hungry too. Now Natasha, I'm taking you to have the doctor look at you."
"But I'm not sick, Uncle."
"I know, but I just want him to check and make sure you're not sick. After that we'll go to dinner, but you shouldn't talk too much at dinner - let the grown-ups talk."
"Oh, okay. I like to hear grown-ups talk, it's real interesting. Much interestinger than my friends talk. Why do you think that is, Uncle Hikaru?"
"I don't know. Now behave yourself while I talk to the doctor."
"I will, don't worry, Uncle."
Sulu had high doubts about that - not that she would misbehave on purpose, but he wasn't sure she understood what was behaving and what, well, wasn't.
When they reached sick bay, he continued holding tightly to her hand and stood in the corner with her while he waited for Bones to finish up with his patient. When he had, he turned abruptly, as if he could feel them standing behind him. "Well, what is it? I'm b…"
Natasha smiled and waved at him in her long shirt. He stared at her, then at Sulu. "Who is this? An undergrown crewman?"
Sulu felt Natasha's hand shake as she giggled. He looked into Bones's somewhat sardonic face and gave a weak smile. "No. This is my niece, Natasha Sulu."
"Your what? I didn't know you had a…"
"Well I do." He was tired of hearing people say that. "She had a sneeze, and I thought she might have caught a bit of a cold."
"What is she wearing?" The doctor peered more closely at Natasha's oversized garment. "It looks familiar…" He looked up at Sulu's collar and a smile spread over his face.
"Yes, well would you look over her?"
"I don't feel bad," Natasha piped up. "I feel fine. I just sneezed one time, and Uncle Hikaru was afraid I'd caught a cold. Why is it called a cold if you don't feel cold? Do you like pepper Mr.… what's your name, anyway? Are you a doctor? I don't know any doctors. I like your eyes - of course, I like brown eyes best, because I have brown eyes and so do my mommy and my uncle, but blue eyes are nice too. Your eyes are very blue. Do you like blue eyes or brown eyes best?"
"Blue," Bones nodded promptly. "Now, would you step over here, Miss Natasha?"
"Should I, Uncle?"
"Yes, yes, do whatever Doctor McCoy says."
"Oh, so your name is Doctor McCoy?" With a happy smile she let go of Sulu's hand and skipped over to Bones. "You must be a doctor then. It's nice to meet you. Do you think I have a cold?"
"Well, let's just see. I'll take care of her. You can go on up to the bridge now."
"Are you sure you can handle her? I mean, you're a doctor, not a babysitter."
"I think that's my line, Mr. Sulu. Of course I can handle her, what, do you think I've never seen a child before? Now I said to go on up to the bridge."
"You should do whatever Doctor McCoy says," Natasha called helpfully. Bones grinned at him.
"Well, alright…" Sulu wasn't sure about this, but he did need to get back up to the bridge and see what was going on. "Watch after her, Doctor, I'll be back soon to take her to dinner."
"No worries. Now, sweetheart," the doctor began, turning to Natasha, "let's take your temperature…"
Not stopping to hear what else Bones would say, Sulu ran out and sprinted to the turbolift to head back to the bridge.
When he got there, mild confusion met his eyes and ears. Kirk was running back and forth yelling things at people, Uhura was speaking into the communicator and trying to be heard over all the noise, Chekov had moved to the navigator's station and was frantically working away, Spock was making logical statements, and everyone else on the bridge seemed to be either running around or yelling or both.
Sulu made his way quickly to the deserted helm and sat down. No sooner had he done this, than Kirk yelled at him. "Mr. Sulu! Just the man I needed. Go down at once and begin ordering dinner from the replicator. We'll be having the Romulan ambassador as a guest."
"What shall I order, sir?" He was surprised at this turn of events, but assumed that rather than tell the Romulans they had made a mistake, Kirk had pretended it was all planned and asked them for dinner to begin negotiations.
"I don't know, do I have to do everything myself? Something Romulan."
Before Sulu could ask any more questions, Kirk had run off somewhere else, and there was nothing to do but hurry down to do as he'd been ordered.
He did his best and then helped some of the crewmen clean and prepare the officers' mess hall. It wasn't until his personal communicator rang two hours later, just as the Romulans were about to beam aboard, that he remembered Natasha.
"Mr. Sulu, are you coming to get your niece anytime soon? I'm supposed to be getting ready for dinner, but I'm about to lose my head here - does she have an off switch or something?"
In the background he could hear Natasha saying, "What's in this bottle, Doctor? Is it poison or medicine? Why do doctors have poison? I thought their job was to unpoison people? I'm glad I don't have a cold. Being sick isn't fun. It kindof is though, because Mommy always gives me fun things to do and gives me ice cream to eat. What kind of ice cream do you like, Doctor McCoy?"
"I'll be right there," Sulu said hurriedly, before shutting off the communicator. Gritting his teeth, he hurried down to sick bay. What was he going to do with her during dinner? He couldn't leave her alone, and he only had five minutes until he had to be sitting down for dinner. He didn't even have time to get her some proper clothes.
When he reached sick bay, she was still jabbering on. "I left poor Mary alone in Uncle Hikaru's room. Can we go get her, Doctor McCoy? I don't want her to be lonely, because being lonely is sad. Are you ever lonely, Doctor?"
"Never," Bones muttered as he straightened his medikit.
Sulu hurried to grab Natasha by the arm. "Thank you, Doctor, I'm sorry."
"Oh, it's alright. I was planning on having a headache anyway."
"Oh, do you have a headache? I'm sorry. When Mommy has a headache she takes some kind of pill. Do you want me to find you a pill, Doctor McCoy?"
"Natasha, the doctor can find a pill by himself, now come on."
"Bye bye, Doctor," she waved happily.
Sulu led her out and headed towards his quarters again to see if her clothes were dry. "Now look, I'm going to a very grown-up dinner, and I have to take you with me."
"Oh yes, you already told me that, you said to let the grown-ups talk. I will."
"No, this is an even more grown-up dinner than I thought it was going to be. Just for tonight, Natasha, I don't want you to talk at all unless a grown-up talks to you."
"Okay, Uncle Hikaru. I won't." She squeezed his hand happily.
Why did he still feel uneasy? "And eat whatever's on your plate, don't be picky. The food will be a little weird."
"Don't worry, Uncle, I like weird food."
"Also, don't touch anything except your silverware and dishes. Leave everything else alone."
"Okay."
His heart sank when he felt her clothes. Still soaking wet. Well, maybe he could sneak her in before everyone else sat down, and she wouldn't attract too much attention. Hurriedly, he ran his comb through her waist-length black hair and rushed her out of the room and to the officers' mess.
Bursting the door open, he started to lead her into what he'd hoped would be an empty room, but to his dismay, the table was almost entirely full. Kirk frowned disapprovingly at him from the head of the table, but didn't say anything. Uhura and Chekov exchanged amused glances when they saw Natasha's attire. Spock raised one eyebrow. Scotty giggled outright. Doctor McCoy, who looked as though he hadn't had quite enough time to comb his hair, wore an expression that was hard to read, but looked a bit like latent irritation. Not only that, but the Romulan ambassador, whom Sulu had once met, sat at the other end of the table, looking frustrated, with two of his chief advisors on either side.
Sulu murmured something that was meant to be "I'm sorry, Captain," but came out a bit more like "Srry." Pushing the naively smiling Natasha in front of him, he walked to the only two seats left, which just so happened to be opposite seats next to the Romulan advisors. The cowards are all afraid to sit here, he thought, not admitting that he was a bit afraid too - mostly because Natasha would have to be on the other side of the table from himself.
The people on the other sides of the unwanted seats were Scotty and Doctor McCoy, and he quickly decided that it would be best to place the little girl next to the good-natured Scotsman. As he hoisted her up into the chair, she smiled and waved her hand at Scotty, but true to her promise, didn't say anything.
After Sulu had seated himself across from her, Kirk cleared his throat loudly. "Shall we begin?"
"Certainly," said the equally tense ambassador.
They began eating in silence, and Sulu grew more miserable as the meal went on, even though Natasha was behaving herself quite well, and eating everything set before her in a very ladylike manner. He just knew that by keeping them waiting for transmission, and then dinner, he'd completely sabotaged the negotiations. Oh, why couldn't he have told that sister-in-law of his to keep her child? He glared across at Natasha, who only responded by turning his brother's eyes on him again and smiling lovingly. He gulped. Those eyes would be his ruin.
He looked down at his food and focused on eating. He hated Romulan food, anyway. How could anyone eat something that was so greenish-yellow? He'd always had a hunch that if they turned the lights off, it would glow in the dark. He had half a mind to try it, he couldn't very well make things much worse than they were now. No one had yet said a single word during the meal.
To his dismay, when he looked up he saw that Natasha was staring fixedly at the Romulan advisor who sat next to her. She had finished her food, and seemed to be transfixed by his ears. He could tell that she was burning to ask about them, but she kept her word and was silent.
He tried clearing his throat subtly, but she didn't notice. Then he tried to kick her under the table, but her legs were too short. He did everything he could think of to catch her eye, but none of it worked.
Somebody say something! He tried his best to think of something, anything to say, since clearly no one else was able to speak.
Just then, someone did speak. That someone was the Romulan advisor Natasha was staring so rudely at. He looked a bit younger, and a little less irritated than the other two Romulans, and he turned and smiled at her.
"Who are you?" was his innocent question.
Sulu knew it was coming. He'd only told her not to talk unless a grown-up talked to her, and now one had. The poor Romulan was in for the chatter of his life now - it would be the end of any last vestige of hope for successful negotiations.
Without hesitation, she exploded. "I'm Natasha. Who are you? Are you a Vulcan, like Mr. Spock? You look a little bit like him, but a little different. Do you like this food? I've never had anything like it, but I love it. Who's that man sitting next to you? He looks sad. Is he sad? Does he like the food? Maybe we should get him something else that he'll like better, so he won't be sad. Do you work here on this ship? I like it, I'm visiting my uncle here, you know. Actually, I guess you don't work here, since you don't have uniforms. That sad man next to you is sure funny looking, who is he?"
As she stopped for an answer, an even greater awkwardness fell upon the room. Chekov and Uhura had ceased their smiling, and even Scotty looked a little nervous. Spock didn't raise even one eyebrow the slightest bit. Bones's irritation had been replaced with an uneasy look, and Kirk gave Sulu a look that communicated that he would personally kill him as soon as dinner was over.
This state of things lasted for about half a minute, when the Romulan ambassador did the very last thing any of them had been expecting. He smiled.
Then he chuckled, then he clapped his hands on the table and laughed out loud. Natasha laughed heartily with him, and then his advisors began chuckling as well. Kirk, taking his cue from them, began to laugh as though he didn't know what it was to be nervous or upset, and Scotty, Chekov and Uhura followed suit. Bones did the best fake laugh he could and poked Sulu in the ribs with his elbow. After wincing, Sulu did his best to chuckle along, though he had no idea what they were all laughing at.
When the laughter had died down, the ambassador continued smiling at Natasha. "I'll tell you why I was sad, little girl. I was upset because I had to come out here on such short notice and I had to miss my little girl's seventh birthday. I miss her. But you know what, you are a lot like her."
Natasha smiled charmingly, stood up and ran over to the ambassador, her oversized turtleneck brushing her knees. "Maybe you should bring your little girl a present to make up for missing her birthday."
"I thought of that, but I don't know what to get her."
"Oh, I'll be right back."
Without another word, she ran out of the room. Sulu was about to run after her, but Kirk waved his hand with an easy smile, as if he'd never even thought of telling Sulu to keep the child with him at all times. "She'll be right back, Mr. Sulu."
"Ah, is the child yours?" smiled the ambassador, turning to Sulu.
"No sir, well, she is my niece, sir. I'm babysitting her for a few days."
"I thought children were not allowed on Federation starships, Captain?"
Kirk was grinning as if the whole thing had been his idea. "Well, it was an emergency. I needed someone to cheer up your honor after the mix-up. By the way, I must apologize about the transmission trouble… we were going to come to you."
"You mean that?"
"Yes, it was just a mistake. I am truly sorry…"
With a gracious nod, the ambassador said, "Don't mention it. It has been a pleasure to dine here with your - amusing crew."
There was another general laugh at this, and then the door at the far end of the room slid open, and Natasha walked in. She did not appear at all embarrassed by the eyes fixed on her, but strode confidently up to the end of the table where the ambassador sat.
It was only then that Sulu saw she had her beloved Mary tucked under her arm.
Smiling, she handed it to the ambassador. "Here is a present for your little girl."
"Natasha…" Sulu whispered.
The ambassador turned to the little girl and laid a hand on her smooth hair. "This is a very special toy, I can tell by the look on your face. Are you sure you want to part with it?"
"She is special. My daddy gave her to me, and my daddy's not here anymore. But I think if he was here, he'd want me to give her to your little girl. Daddies are special, and I wouldn't want your little girl to feel sad that you missed her birthday."
Sulu felt his eyes grow moist as he saw a tiny tear roll down her dark cheek. The ambassador picked up Natasha and held her close. "I think your daddy would be proud," he said gently.
Sulu didn't care what the rest of the crew thought of him anymore. He stood up and made his way over to his niece. "Thank you, ambassador," he said clearly. "We hope that your daughter will enjoy this special gift." He lifted Natasha in his arms and held her. She smiled at him.
There was another silence, and then Kirk spoke up. "Well, shall we begin negotiations?"
The ambassador agreed, but Sulu said, "With all respect, sir, I think I shall take Natasha to bed."
Kirk nodded a smiling assent, and Sulu carried the girl out and back to his quarters, where he'd set up a little cot for her in the corner.
As he laid her down, she smiled up at him. "Did I do the right thing, Uncle Hikaru?"
He smiled back. "Yes. I am proud of you."
"Goodnight, Uncle Hikaru," she murmured, closing her eyes sleepily. It had been a long, exciting day for her.
He covered her up. "Goodnight, Natasha. Sweet dreams."
When the ten days were up, Kirk, Spock, Uhura, Chekov, Bones and Scotty gathered in the transporter room with Sulu and his niece. She walked down the line and hugged each of them in their turn, thanking Kirk politely for letting her come aboard, thanking Bones for letting her help in sick bay, apologizing to Scotty for saying he was kind of fat, assuring Chekov that she'd visit him in Russia someday, telling Uhura she liked her earrings, and asking Spock if it was logical to be sad when you were going home.
When she reached Sulu, her smile faded and he knelt down to get on her level. She wrapped her little arms around his neck and whispered. "Do I have to go?"
"Yes."
"But I'll miss you, Uncle Hikaru. Can't you come with me?"
"I wish I could. But I have work to do here."
She sniffed. "I never got a uniform."
"Well, when you get a little older, I'll get you one. Maybe you can even work here with me."
She pulled back with a smile. "Really?"
"Maybe."
Hugging him one last time, she murmured, "I love you, Uncle Hikaru."
"I love you too, Natasha."
"Ready?" Scotty asked, energizing the transporter.
She sniffed again, smiled, and nodded.
"Feel free to beam up anytime," Kirk smiled as she stepped onto the transporter pad.
"Thanks." Her smile spread over her face again, and she gave Sulu one last look before Scotty beamed her back down to earth, where she belonged.
When she was gone, Chekov sighed. "I am really going to miss that little girl."
"To the bridge, officers," was all Kirk said.
Spock and Chekov followed him out, but Uhura paused to lay a hand on his shoulder kindly. "Are you going to be alright?"
"Yes," he smiled. "Thank you. She'll be back."
As he walked back to the bridge, he resolved that next time she came, he'd have a Starfleet uniform ready for his special little niece. He smiled. He would have to make sure the shirt that went with it…
… was pink.
