Because of You
Summary: A songfic to Kelly Clarkson's Because of You . It's about Remus' feelings when Sirius is sent to Azkaban. Kind of slash, but not really. Remus' POV. I cut a few choruses out of the song because it would have been way to much.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not the song, the characters, not anything. Even though I would like to.
I will not make
the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
cause myself so much misery.
Sirius, how could you my dearest friend, betray my trust like this. You caused my heart to break. James and Lily were your friends, Sirius. You betrayed them. And Peter, too. How could you kill them all? Even the innocent people on the street. Poor Harry is living with muggles because of what you did. He will never know his real parents! I never knew you were so heartless.
I will not break
the way you did,
you fell so hard.
I've learned the hard way to never let it get that far.
How am I supposed to trust again? You've ruined my life Sirius. Do you feel any guilt, because you deserve to. You ruined more lives than just mine. You ended a lot of them while you were at it.
Because of you
I never stray to far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt.
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me.
Because of you I am afraid.
Trust, what is trust? A false sense of security that leads to betrayal. I can never trust you, or anyone else, for that matter. My life is awful now, thanks to you. My only friends ever are all dead, and one betrayed me. Last full moon, I know the wolf was looking for his friends. How do I know this? When I transformed back into myself, all I could see was blood. No one was there to protect me from hurting myself.
I lose my way
And it's not to long before you point it out.
I can not cry
because I know that's weakness in your eyes.
I'm forced to fake
a smile and a laugh every day of my life.
And why, now that I know who you really are, do I still do what you used to think was right. I can't think on my own. When we were younger, I wasn't like you and James. It became my second nature to do whatever you did. Right now, I feel like I am a children's toy. I do whatever my owner wants me to do. I feel as if you are still mt owner. I only have you to thank for making me feel like this.
My heat can't possibly break,
when it wasn't even whole to start with.
I watched you die,
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me.
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain.
And now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing.
When we were still living at Hogwarts, you came home from Christmas break. I had known you were forced to go home. That night when you went to bed I heard you crying, almost silently. I got you to talk to me. They had betrayed your trust. You were going to live at James' over the summer. Who is betrayed now, Sirius? I was betrayed, and I have no friends to lean on like you did.
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid
Because of you
