(A/N: This is my first fic that I have ever written so please tell me what you think and review. Be honest, but avoid any serious flames, especially if it's over pairings. I also will warn you my story is written in a very dark and obscure manner, so you have been forewarned.)
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned.
Chapter 1- Shattered Glass
(Written in P.O.V. of Greg Sanders)
It pains me how my obsession grows each day I'm around her, it builds momentum with each smile, laugh or demonstration of sheer intelligence.
She is perfect in every way to me. To many she is cold and aggressive, but I know her true spirit beneath the tough exterior.
She's been called things such as enigma, bitch, and brilliant. I don't understand why she is known as a bitch because she is actually loyal and kind hearted if they just got to know her. People can be so cruel it seems, passing judgment on a person the moment they see them. I think it makes her more amazing, the fact that she can hide her true personality and sense of humor at work. She is always so level headed and professional, I envy her while trying to emulate her brilliance at the same time. Whatever you want to call her, she'll always be Sara Sidle.
Over the years I had grown-up from an annoying pestering lab technician who harbored a school-boy crush to a real forensic analyst who had fallen in love with my best friend. The only problem is she doesn't realize I love her. She thinks my infatuation dissolved as years went by. She never took it seriously though, brushing my feelings away not realizing my obsession was growing daily.
I want to spend as much time with her as possible, even though we are always paired together so she can mentor me. I think of excuses to go to dinner and have serious conversations with her, hoping to disprove the theory that I'm immature and shallow. I try to learn more about her, to see into her broken soul, but when I finally see the true Sara my love has doubled.
My obsession is a never ending vicious cycle, I will always want her, but never act upon it for fear of breaking the friendship. I tell myself this thought process of mine is in her best interest, but I know it's all for me and my selfish ways. If our friendship ends I won't see Sara anymore. True, I will see her everyday, but never her true shining personality I crave to release. We'll never have the same amazing conversations over coffee or movies and take-out at her house, with my arm protectively wrapped around her small-frame to protect her from the unrealistic evil monster she is convinced will come knocking on her door if she watches a horror movie. Not that I mind or anything, I mean it is my arm wrapped around her. I am too selfish to admit my love to her; which is funny because I seem to always contradict myself when I think or talk about her.
I seem to be thinking about her every moment I can. I almost feel guilty when I talk to a fellow colleague and I'm secretly thinking, "I wish Sara was here."
Even if I did admit my love to Sara, it would never work. She doesn't believe in inter-office relationships, she cares far too much about work. I wish I were more like her, she is completely selfless.
I also have a growing suspicion she is seeing someone. She seems to have less and less free-time as the cruel autumn days string by me. I can also sense her new found guilt whenever we have discussions or simply enjoy each others company. I had never seen that look when we were together until a couple of months ago. There was also one day that makes me gag just to think of it. We had met about a week ago on a Sunday morning for coffee and a walk, just as we always do, and she was late. Sara Sidle was late! That never happens. That wasn't the action that disturbed me or sparked my suspicions further, when she let out a laugh and released all tension in her neck, throwing it back gracefully making her scarf shift a bit and revealing what I swear was a hickey.
I shuddered as soon as I saw the mark. It was taunting me with its obscure shape and fierce color. I immediately shifted my gaze to the path that was decorated with hues of red and orange. I didn't want Sara to become humiliated by the mark left by her mysterious lover so I never mentioned it again or asked if she was seeing anyone. I didn't want her mad at me because Ineed her.
I realize this obsession is becoming unhealthy, so I know what I need to do. I am going to proclaim my love to Miss Sara Sidle, my Sara and hope the feeling is mutual.
I courageously snatch up the two mugs of coffee and stroll towards the locker room, knowing Sara is always here 45 minutes early which will give us plenty of time to discuss us. I know work isn't the ideal place to do this, but since she leaves no more free-time available to me, I'll hopefully get her to take a walk over coffee, like we always do.
As I approach the locker room my heart begins to beat more rapidly and I feel the butterflies in my stomach multiplying. I open the door and am hit with her scent, I know she is in here, but wait….this scent is beginning to be overpowered by a man's cologne. Wait, I recognize this scent! It smells like-
And my hypothesis on who is wearing the cologne becomes a harsh reality as I drop my mugs on the ground allowing them to shatter in a million pieces with steaming coffee splashing all over. Except I don't notice that, all I notice is the rather passionate embrace of Sara Sidle, my love Sara Sidle, my reason for living, and my other best friend Nick Stokes being broken apart at the sound of shattering glass and the looks of guilt and confusion I receive at my open-mouthed expression plastered on my face.
Well I guess I was wrong when I said she didn't believe in inter-office relationships, she doesn't believe in any relationship with me, Greg Sanders.
