A/N: A Malcolm in the Middle crossover with H2O Just Add Water. I don't own anything. This will be a one shot and will follow the style of a normal Malcolm in the Middle episode. This takes place during the beginning of season 4 in Malcolm in the Middle and after season 1 in H2O Just Add Water.
The Australian Exchange Student
(Cold Opening)
The scene faded from black to Reese sitting at the kitchen table with Dewey painting white eggs into brown eggs.
"Now mom won't make us eat this organic crap." Reese said painting another egg.
"I hate organic." Dewey said with a disgusted look on his face.
Malcolm walked in and wondered what his brothers were doing. "What are you guys doing?" Malcolm asked. "We are just painting white eggs so they look organic, want to paint one?" Reese asked.
"Sure, give me one." Malcolm replied and sat next to his brothers to paint his first one.
The scene shifted to breakfast with the family including Hal and Lois having scrambled eggs, bacon and toast.
"Mmmmmm, these organic eggs are delicious honey, boys organic is healthy." Hal said in delight, then turning to the boys.
"Glad you like them." Lois replied with a smile.
The boys across the table were just whispering and making small snickering laughter.
(Malcolm in the Middle opening Theme Song)
(Theme Song Ends)
The scene faded from black, to the boys walking home from school, opening the door to their house to the living room to find Lois standing there in her Lucky aid outfit with all their stuff thrown out of their only room that they share.
"What is going on?" Reese asked in a frantic and angry tone.
"Yeah, why is all of our stuff out!" Dewey shouted.
"You can't do this mom that is our only room of privacy where we sleep, you can't just kick us out of our only room like we are some kind of zoo animals, and that it is totally unfair!" Malcolm shouted.
"Now boys, we will be having an exchange student from Australia, and I want you on your best behavior, that means, no fighting, no pranks and no parties, she will be staying in your room." Lois hollered.
"You can't do this!" Reese talked back. "This is totally unfair!" Dewey cried. "Now you tell us, who is this, and when is this coming and mom… THIS IS TOTALLY UNFAIR!" Malcolm yelled in disgust.
"Life is unfair, deal with it. And she is not this; her name is Emma Gilbert she is from the Gold Coast, and she is coming for a month to study in America for winning an essay contest. Hal and I applied so she could stay with us; maybe you boys can learn a thing or two from her." Lois explained with anger.
"You mean… you knew!" Reese cried. "Yes we knew all along, this month will be different; for once there will be another girl in the house." Lois said with excitement.
"When is she coming?" Malcolm asked.
"Tonight," Lois's face went with excitement.
"NO!" All three whined.
"Now I will go and change, to meet her at the airport with Hal tonight at 8' o clock.
Lois went off to go change, where she and Hal would be meeting. Hal all of a sudden walked in and was surprised to see all the boys stuff thrown out.
"Mom's kicking us out of our room, she can't just do that." Malcolm yelled.
"Now now boys, this is only for a month." Hal said, trying to calm down the boys.
"I can't believe you knew about this, dad." Malcolm said. "Emma will be staying for a month, and I want you boys to get along with her, you need to give her that room." Hal explained. Hal left to go to Lois.
Hal walked into the bedroom where Lois was almost done changing, he put his hands around Lois and started to hug Lois. "Oh Hal stop that, get changed," Lois said with a laughter. "Ok," Hal replied.
A few minutes later when Hal and Lois were done changing clothes they were ready to pick Emma Gilbert up from the Airport. "Now boys, don't put anything on fire, no joining animal gangs, no parties and no hobos in our house." Lois stated with a mean look. "Got it mom," all three responded. "Good now we will be off to the airport." Lois said. "Remember the emergency number is on the kitchen, and when you get hungry order some pizza." Hal said. "Bye dad," all three said. The door closed and they were off to pick Emma unknowingly who they were actually dealing with.
The scene changed to Reese, Malcolm and Dewey watching some wrestling on a Friday night. "Now that's got to hurt." Reese stated when one wrestler slammed another one down to the floor with a loud bang.
"One, two, three and he are out," the announcer said.
"Hey Dewey I dare you too… um… punch Malcolm." Reese said, turned to Dewey.
"Ok." Dewey said.
Dewey punched Malcolm in the elbow. "OW! What was that for?" Malcolm complained, rubbing his left elbow.
"That was for making me a fool at school the other day."
"That wasn't my fault; you don't know your multiplication table." Malcolm tried to explain.
Reese landed another punch, as Reese wanted to land another punch the door bell rang. Nobody moved to get the door; it ranged a couple more times.
"I bet it is that girl… what's her name?" Reese said.
"Emma," Malcolm replied. "I am not going to get the door."
Nobody moved to get the door, until Dewey agreed to get the door. When Dewey opened the door, none of the boys were expecting this.
"Francis," all three said with excitement, they were shocked as ever, and didn't expect Francis to show up instead they expected Emma to show up. They all ran to him.
"What are you doing here?" Reese asked.
"I was invited to stay when Emma comes over, only for a week."
"You knew?" Malcolm asked.
"I did, but it is so unfair that she had to kick you out. We have to do something about this."
"Yeah we do." Reese said.
"It is totally unfair!" Dewey cried.
"I know it is." Francis stated. "We will do something about this guy's right?"
"Right," everyone agreed.
The next 20 minutes or so were peaceful and full of entertainment when Francis came from working in the desert where he works for Otto a German immigrant with his wife Gretchen at the hotel called the Grotto. Francis's wife Piama didn't since come since arguing last time with his mother Lois at Hal's birthday. The last minutes of their freedom were going to be stripped away as soon… the doorbell rang, and it just did.
(Door Slam Shut, Scene Fades to Black)
The scene faded from black to the door being opened by Hal. Hal entered first taking off his jacket, followed by Lois.
"Hi boys we just got back, good to see you Francis." Hal told him directly, and greeted him with a father and son hug.
"Emma, you can come out now." Lois turned outside for Emma to come inside.
The boys were shocked, she was a blonde Australian gold coast girl, who grew up on the beaches, and she was a little taller than the average U.S American girl. Her hair was tied up, wearing caprice pants, tennis shoes, a white short t-shirt and a necklace that Miss. Chatman gave her.
"Hi I'm Emma Gilbert; it's nice to meet you." She greeted the boys; her Australian accent was clearly visible.
Malcolm and Reese were looking at each other with shocked expressions at how good looking she was and who was going to get her, at last the sibling dating rivalry begins.
"I'm going to get her, move out of the way Reese." Malcolm said angrily.
"No she's mine." Reese replied.
The brothers were about to start fighting over yet… another girl. Dewey just looked at them with a bored look. Lois was furious at how they were acting.
"BOYS, STOP THIS, THIS INSTANT NOW!" Lois hollered. Reese and Malcolm froze at the spot before they were going to go all monkeys out on each other. "You will not behave like this when we have a guest. Do you understand?" They nodded in agreement. "Now help Emma carry her bags to her room, this includes Dewey and you Francis."
They all groaned in a painful agreement and were off to carry the bags to Emma's room, which was their room.
"I'm sorry you had to see that Emma, but boys will be boys." Lois stated.
"Yeah, I know what you mean." Emma managed a smile.
"I'm going to go order some pizza for dinner." Hal said running off to the kitchen and order pizza.
Lois was very glad to have a girl finally in the house instead of all the boy noises, and would be able to spend some mother and daughter time that she never was able to have. For Lois this was a dream come true. Emma on the other hand had more to her than she was letting on, especially since she and her friends back home have a little secret that deals with water. Emma was very glad to win that essay and come to America for one month to study and learn more about the culture of America. Lewis must be very jealous.
The boys came in, Malcolm with the suitcase and Francis with the carryon bag. A few moments later Francis and Malcolm were finally in their room, which would now be Emma's for the next month where they would sleep on the couch.
"I'm going to see when pizza's coming." Francis said, and he was off.
Malcolm set the suitcase on ground just as Francis left, and Emma walked into the room.
"This room is big, which bed should I take?" She asked.
Malcolm turned to the audience and started to break the fourth wall "This is my chance, I have to make a move on her, before Reese does, she is also probably one of those smart kids, who gets all good grades." Malcolm told the audience, and he turned back facing Emma.
"So, how is it like in Australia?" Malcolm asked curiously.
"It's like any country, I live on the Gold Coast near the beaches and it is mostly warm there." Emma explained.
"Oh, you do a lot of swimming then?" Malcolm asked.
"Yeah, a lot," she stated. "It is a little colder here, since it is winter."
"Right, it is summer in Australia, because the Earth's axis is pointing the opposite direction parallel to our side, with the north hemisphere facing away from the sun while the south hemisphere pointing towards the sun." Malcolm explained.
"You are one of the smart ones in this house, Lewis would be glad to meet you." She said.
Malcolm turns toward the audience. "This might not be so bad after all." He said.
For Malcolm this was bad because Reese just walked in and saw him and Emma talking. Reese wouldn't like it if Malcolm got Emma, because it would end badly with a fight to the death.
"What are you doing?" Reese yelled.
"It's not what it looks like, we were just talking." Malcolm replied.
"Guys, stop this." Emma shouted. "I am not here to date, you both look like great guys, but I'm here to study."
"Everyone, dinner's ready." Lois called out.
The whole family gathered and sat at the kitchen table to enjoy 3 large pizzas from Luigi's pizza. One pizza was veggie, the other was pepperoni and the last one was cheese. The boys were digging in and stuffing their faces with pizza. Emma knows what pizza is and tried some Luigi's pizza and she enjoyed it just like the rest of the family. Dinner was eaten with some jokes told by Hal. Malcolm and Reese were having their rivalry that should get Emma and impress her. Dinner lasted for about 20 minutes until there were only 2 slices left. Malcolm and Reese were staring with hatred in each other eyes, of who wants the last slice.
"It's mine." Reese said.
"No I will have it." Malcolm replied.
Dewey was just staring at them with a confused innocent look; Francis said to knock it off. Emma was just staring with a confused look as well.
"Alright, Emma has the last slice." Lois stated, giving Emma the last slice of veggie pizza. Malcolm and Reese just stared with a confused look.
Both of them started to stare and argue when accidentally they spilled a glass of water onto Emma. The water splashed and Emma's shirt and pants were all wet. Emma was all shocked, Lois was simply calming her down.
"I'm so sorry." Malcolm said apologetically, as well as Reese.
Emma knew she had to get out of the kitchen as soon as possible, which she got up and ran towards the bathroom and shut the door behind her. Within a few seconds after closing the door she dropped onto the floor sprouting a mermaid tail with orange/yellow scales and a bra that matched the tail. Emma was secretly a mermaid where she and her friends Rikki and Cleo were transformed to mermaids on Mako Island a few months earlier. At the table everyone was surprised at why would anyone run from water?
"Who runs away from water?" Lois asked, followed by everyone pondering and asking the same question as well.
"That was weird." Hal stated.
"I bet she is an alien who transforms when water is sprayed onto her." Reese said.
Dewey just looked scared and was about to scream. "Now son, don't believe what Reese says, even though that was a little unusual, I'm sure she has some personal reasons." Hal stated.
Lois went over to the bathroom door. "Are you ok?" Lois asked. "I'll be fine, just give me a few minutes and I'll be out." She replied. "Ok, take your time." Lois replied and turned towards Malcolm and Reese and mouthed out the words something like: You boys are in so much trouble, grounded for a month.
The evening went alright, Malcolm and Reese apologized, and Emma wasn't so mad anymore; Hal was planning to buy a motorcycle with Francis without Lois's permission, Lois would go shopping with Emma as Lois never had a mother/daughter relationship and Malcolm and Reese are going to be scrubbing floors for the next month. The scene faded to black.
(Door Slams Shut)
The scene faded from black to Malcolm and Reese scrubbing the kitchen floor with toothbrushes.
"This is totally unfair and this is your entire fault." Reese said.
"No it's yours, and it's not fair that mom had to kick us out, she doesn't even agree with us and she grounded us for nothing.
"I know what we will do?" Reese stated. "What?" Malcolm asked.
"We will throw the biggest party tonight and show mom that she can't just ground us for a mistake, and show Emma the real American life." Reese said.
"That was the smartest thing you've ever said Reese." Malcolm sounded surprised.
In the meantime Francis and Hal were going shopping to look around for motorcycles. They both spotted a used Harley Motorcycle for $8,000. The price was too much to be paid for. The owner of the shop wouldn't let them ride it without licenses.
"Can we ride this motorcycle?" Francis asked.
"Can you show me your licenses?" The seller asked.
Hal and Francis looked at each other for a few minutes with a surprised expression.
"Um… we don't exactly have licenses, but we can make a deal, and it's only for a couple of minutes." Hal said.
"Sorry boys, no license, no driving." The seller said.
Hal dropped his mouth and looked at him suspiciously while Francis was trying to figure out a way to bride the seller. Within minutes Hal and Francis got on the motorcycle, started the engine, Francis was driving and were off. They crashed through the glass window and were off.
"HEY! GET BACK HERE I'M CALLING THE COPS!" The dealer raged.
About 20 miles from where Hal and Francis stole the motorcycle for a spin ride; Lois and Emma are shopping for clothes, and Dewey is in the arcade room playing some kind of monster vs. alien game.
"Die monster die," Dewey called out to the arcade machine. In the meantime Lois found a beautiful blue dress that would suit Emma.
"That's beautiful," Emma exclaimed in excitement.
"Go try it on." Lois replied.
"I will." Emma said going to try on the blue dress.
Lois waited for about 5 minutes before Emma came back. Lois knew this was a dream come true shopping at last with a girl, she may not be hers, but she will be living with her for a whole month, Lois also imagined with she were her daughter. Emma came back.
"This dress fits me." Emma said with a smile.
"That's great, it only costs $50, I'll buy it, it is yours to keep." Lois said.
"Thanks," she said.
Both of them walked over to the cash register and paid for the dress. Lois and Emma went to find Dewey who was playing in the arcade portion of the mall. Lois grabbed him, which meant it was time to go home.
"Just one more game," Dewey cried.
Dewey reminded Emma of her younger brother Elliot who wasn't much older or younger than him. Both of them got along a few times, sometimes they fought, at times she was there to help him out with love advice. Heck, they even had the same hair color.
"Come on." Lois growled, grabbing a crying Dewey.
At home the real fun was just beginning when Malcolm and Reese were calling people from school to come to a party at school, even though they aren't exactly the popular ones, people will come to a party either way. Moments pass by and about 40-50 people show up, surprisingly they all fit in the small house. Upbeat techno music was playing, two couples in the corner were making it out, football jock players were throwing around a football and Malcolm and Reese were trying to enjoy the moment as well.
"Hey cool party." A tall brown girl said, and approached Malcolm.
"Thanks," Malcolm replied with a happy grin on his face.
(Malcolm turns to the audience)
"This is going great, even though the music is loud, we will show Emma the real American party lifestyle now that mom will give us more attention." Malcolm said, as he was breaking the fourth wall. Malcolm turns back to face the girl.
"So what's your name?" Malcolm asked.
"My name is Carly. What's yours?" She asked.
"I'm Malcolm."
"That's a nice name; my brother's name is Malcolm."
"Oh… that's really nice."
Across in the kitchen Reese was trying to impress some girls with a disgusting joke. "Wait! Don't go," he cried out. "You're gross." One blonde said.
Away from the party, about 30 miles away, Hal and Francis are having a cop party. Five police cars chasing them.
"Stop and return the vehicle." One cop said through the speakers.
"Maybe we should pull over." Hal suggested.
Francis didn't reply. The chase went on for the next couples of minutes until the motorcycle started to run out of gas and finally it stopped. The cops were surrounding them both.
"Step away from the vehicle." A cop called out, as Hal and Francis both got up from the motorcycle.
"Put your hands behind your backs, you're under arrest."
The cops came forward with two handcuffs and placed their hands.
"Dad… I'll always love you no matter what, even if mom finds out about this, I'm sorry." Francis cried.
"No I'm sorry; it was my entire fault if I hadn't taken you to the shop we wouldn't be in this mess." Hal replied started to cry.
The cops led both of them to the car and drove them to the police station, to get bailed out and await trial.
Back at the house Malcolm and Reese are enjoying themselves, it was only about an hour since the party started, unknowingly Lois, Emma and Dewey are going to be home in a couple of minutes. Football players were crashing around, soda was being sprayed all over the place; pizza was being thrown this way and the other. Havoc exploded.
"This party is getting out of control Reese." Malcolm shouted next to him.
"We've got to stop this." Reese replied.
Both of them tried to get the attention of the party people, but it didn't work, nobody was listening. "We've tried everything." Malcolm said. Unknown to Malcolm and Reese Lois has arrived and parked on the street and was getting ready to go inside.
"What is that noise?" Lois yelled.
Emma and Dewey looked at each other, but they knew exactly what was going on.
"A party," Emma asked.
"Yeah," Dewey replied.
Both of them entered into the house and to Emma's surprise she was seeing a real American party with American football players and American music, even though parties are still thrown in Australia a way of rebelling against parents this was different a party in America, even though not a big party girl herself especially after becoming a mermaid she's tried to avoid as much. She has to watch out for the soda that was sparing 10 feet away from her.
"What is going on?" Dewey asked trying to find Malcolm and Reese.
Both of them looked shocked. "Oh crap! Mom's home," Reese exclaimed. Malcolm looked at Reese with a scared look.
Accidentally two soda cans were shacked, it was headed towards Emma, and luckily for her she saw the liquid heading towards her, not much space to avoid it. Emma has no other choice but to freeze the liquid with her powers. She stuck her hand out and the liquid froze and fell to the ground. Luckily for Emma nobody seemed to pay attention to soda freezing which all happened within 3 seconds, because of a fight over a girlfriend.
"Stop this," Dewey cried.
"Shut up Dewey." Malcolm yelled.
Only a few more moments passed when everyone's nightmare began, Lois entered the house to see a whole party of hooligans. Lois looked with fury and angers her face is about to explode.
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?" Lois hollered with rage. Everyone noticed and was actually scared for a moment. "I WANT YOU ALL OUTTA MY HOUSE IMMEDIATELY." Lois continued to rage. She walked over to a football player kissing his girlfriend. "You are too young to be calling this love of use." Lois scolded, the boy and girl left immediately with frightened looks on their faces. Lois walked over to the dancing crowd. "I want you OUT!" Lois yelled, the frightened dancers left immediately. Everybody left and that left Malcolm and Reese.
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF ALL THIS BOYS?" Lois raged. "You are grounded FOR LIFE!"
The aftermath of the party ended with Malcolm and Reese cleaning up and continuing on with the punishment of scrubbing floors with toothbrushes and household chores to the extreme for the next three months. Hal and Francis bailed out each other which cost them all their bank account savings and when Lois found out about this… it was bad.
It was the next day and things weren't normal. Hal and Francis explained to Lois about their little adventure yesterday, that it cost them all of their savings.
"What do you mean you got arrested?" Lois raged. Francis and Lois got into an argument which leads Francis to leave five days early then planned. Malcolm and Reese were up scrubbing their punishment, while Dewey and Emma are watching a cartoon and eating cereal and drinking orange juice.
"This is delicious." Emma said, as she put another spoonful of Froot Loops.
A few moments later the phone rang. Lois picked up the phone and was surprised who it was.
"Emma it's for you." She called out.
Emma got up and went towards the phone. "Hello who is this?" She asked. "Hi Emma, its Elliot I was just calling to ask you, how is America?"
"Hi Elliot, America is great won't go to school until tomorrow, but I had a bit of unusual family. They can be pretty weird and what not, but funny and cool." She explained.
"That's great. Mom and dad want to talk to you." Elliot gave the phone over to Mr. and Mrs. Gilbert.
"Hi mom and dad," Emma said with a smile. "Hi honey how is it in America?" They asked.
"Mom everything is great, it may not be what I expected but it is great to see America."
The conversation ended with a farewell and a call to be awaited for tomorrow. The day went on as normal Dewey and Emma continued to do some sister/brother bonding, Reese and Malcolm were as miserable as they can get and Lois continued to rage at Hal.
"Now we don't have any money left." Lois yelled.
(Door Slams Shut)
The End
A/N: I hope you all enjoyed my first one shot!
I really had a lot of fun writing this story until next time!
Stolen Love will be updated soon!
