CHAPTER01: Introduction and Author's Note

(Author's Note: I had to do a bit of fudging to get the general plotline of this to work correctly. For all intents and purposes, Unit 00 never got trashed, there was no Rei III, and most of End of Evangelion never happened. More detail in the intro. The MST3K Mantra is king on anything else that I get wrong; don't let fridge logic or minor inconsistencies with the series/EoE ruin your enjoyment of the fic.)

Excerpt from the Journal of Shinji Ikari

Dear Journal.

My name is Shinji Ikari. I am currently 25 years old and I have no permanent home.

At about age 14, I was thrust into an organization known as NERV that my father led. They wanted me to pilot a giant robot called an Evangelion, and they wanted me to fight aliens known as Angels. It seemed like a simple idea at the time, but... it wasn't. I felt indescribable pain with every victory; the only thing keeping me going was the fact that it was my duty. Some good did come out of the situation, however; I met my nakama.

First, I met Rei Ayanami. She always somewhat creeped me out; however, I eventually got used to her introverted personality and took quite a liking to her.

Next, I met Toji and Kensuke. Toji was a bit of an ass, but hey, he had a reason for his actions and I understand every bit of it. Kensuke was awesome, though. He was an otaku and he took a huge interest in the military; the one odd bit that I never really got, though, was why he carried that camcorder around all the time. It must have gotten a bit cumbersome.

Finally, I met Asuka Langley Soryuu. Saying she was a bitch would be a massive understatement, but hey, she was damned hot and she lived with me. What more can a 14-year-old guy ask for? (There were also some other things that happened between me and her, but I'm not going to mention them for obvious reasons. "Fap fap fap" should be enough of a hint for you.)

Then, the Third Impact nearly happened. It was narrowly avoided through the actions of the late Misato Katsuragi, bless her soul. She died saving me and Rei from JSSDF soldiers that were working for SEELE, or as I like to call them, the Omniscient Council of Vagueness;

My father, Gendo, had a plan to start this fucked-up thing called Instrumentality that would basically turn us all into dreaming orange juice. Thankfully, he needed Rei for that, and Misato got her the hell away from him before he could drag her down into that Terminal Dogma place and start Instrumentality. This had decidedly catastrophic consequences; Gendo was later found dead from a self-inflicted headshot.

Since Misato and Gendo were both dead, Kaji had been dead for a while, and NERV was pretty well fucked in half, all of us pilots were sent to an orphanage. We lived there until we turned 18; me and Rei moved to Tokyo-2 and got an apartment together as roommates, whereas Asuka, Kensuke and Toji joined a private military company. (For those not fluent in Kensuke-ese, they became mercenaries.)

What's that? You're surprised that they joined a mercenary organization rather than becoming soldiers in the standing army? Well, don't be. There is no standing army because any country that has one is liable to be expelled from the UN. This ruling was passed after NERV was dissolved, because the suits thought that war would distract people from providing aid to the Japanese government. Hey, don't ask me, I think it's moronic too, but my opinion doesn't seem to matter much.

So, me and Rei lived somewhat peacefully for 2 years or so, when the files relating to NERV were declassified and I finally found out the truth relating to Gendo's death; he had shot himself in the face after failing to initiate the Third Impact. As much of an ass as the guy was, he was still family... to Rei, at least. She was devastated to an utterly bizarre degree, and I think it somewhat rubbed off on me since I felt a strange feeling that it was really my fault things went out of control, and I had to atone for it.

I called up Kensuke, asked him what PMC he (along with the rest of my nakama) was working for, and almost immediately enlisted. Rei wasn't too far behind; she couldn't get any other job due to the fact that she's generally awful at expressing emotion of any sort.

We all ended up in the same unit. Asuka was unit leader, unsurprisingly. Her first reaction was, and I quote directly, "Oh, scheissen. The doll and the idiot. Wonders never cease."

Her second reaction was, and again I quote directly, "Holy. Fucking. Shit." as both me and Rei passed the marksmanship test with flying colors. Rei decided to take sniper training, too, which I decided wasn't worth the trouble since I'd rather be on the front lines. Kensuke wasn't terribly taken aback by Rei's decision- she had always seemed the sniper type to him- but my decision amazed him; according to him I had never seemed the type to go on the front lines at all, let alone on foot.

Damn, there goes Asuka on the intercom again. Apparently some rich guy wants a big stretch of land in Pakistan for himself and he assumed our ragtag little bunch can clear it out. Before I put my journal away, let me jot down the list of people in the unit and what they do:

Maj. Soryuu (doesn't mind being called Asuka) – team leader. Weapon of choice: H&K MP5; she has a thing for old guns, especially ones of German manufacture. Her sidearm is a Mauser C96; the thing's a fucking relic, but apparently it gives her good luck or something. I'm not going to question it for obvious reasons, namely I'm a bit scared that she'll shoot me with it.

Staff Sgt. Aida – SAW gunner. Uses an FN M249; his sidearm is a Glock 18.

Spc. Ayanami – Sniper. Uses an MSG-90. Sidearm is a Beretta 92FS.

P.F.C. Suzuhara – Demolitions, also trained in CQB. Demoted to P.F.C. from Sgt. for annoying Asuka. Uses C4 Plastic Explosives and a Remington 870 shotgun; he took a Glock 18 as his sidearm.

And last but not least, me. Corporal Shinji Ikari. Rifleman. I took an AKS-74u; not exactly a new design, but it'll do until I can get something better. For my sidearm, I grabbed a Ruger Blackhawk chambered in .38 Special. Kensuke suggested it because it doesn't have a ton of recoil and it has good enough stopping power for my purposes. I also got a KA-BAR combat knife.

Overall, I like my job.

7/13/2025

Cpl. Shinji Ikari