The feeling of despair

Author's note: Hello everyone, I am black angel in love. I apologize for disappearing this year, it was my last year in high school and that means really difficult exams.

Now, as for this fic, I have had this idea in my head for a year, but I was unable to write it because of my schedule. I love skip beat, which is unusual for me, because I find shoujo quite boring… but skip beat invaded my mind and I was unable to stop thinking about it and I made a fic completely in my head, so I decided to write it… I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: Sho x Kyoko, Ren and Kyoko siblings, Saena bashing, devious Kyoko.

Summary: Knowing that Sho was sleeping around, Kyoko couldn't stand to play the innocent oblivious girl anymore. It was time to leave him and live her dream and follow her parents' footsteps in the showbiz. But even though she left him, she knew she couldn't break their engagement… because it had been arranged by their parents since they were really young. But that doesn't mean they couldn't have other relationships… and Kyoko plans to make Sho so jealous that he'll only think about her.

Chapter 1: Hidden identity

First person P.O.V

My name is Kyoko Mogami. I am sixteen years old and I live in an apartment with the new up and coming singer, Sho Fuwa. Well, to tell the truth, I used to live there. As from today, I left his stupid ass and went to fulfill my dream.

You see, Sho and I have been engaged since we were little kids and my mother abandoned me, but not before she engaged me to Sho. Well, I say my mother, but in truth, that woman never was my mother. She was a woman so jealous of my mother and her talent that she kidnapped me when I was six months old. Unfortunately, despite her not being my mother, the engagement still was legal as she was my guardian during that time.

But to tell the truth, even if it wasn't legal, I wouldn't have said anything, because no matter how much I hate Sho's playboy tendencies, I am also completely and utterly in love with him, no matter how much his behavior has hurt me.

You must wonder how I know that Saena wasn't my real mother, right? When I was seven, I met a boy who looked so much like me before Saena died my blonde hair black. We stood staring at each other for a long while and then the boy grabbed my arm and dragged me to his parents all while speaking English.

It turns out, I looked so much like his mother when she was younger that he was sure I must be his long lost little sister. His parents seemed to agree and with my concession, we took a blood test. It turned out that I was really their lost daughter and that my name really was Kyoko. My parents' names were Kuu and Juliena Hizuri and the boy who dragged me to them was my older brother, Kuon.

My family wanted to take me back with them, but I refused. I know I hurt them, but then as I explained that I was engaged to Fuwa Sho and I wanted to stay and support him through his dream to become a professional singer, they accepted my decision and left, but not before giving me a cellphone so that I could talk to them while they were in America.

I grew up and soon I left with Sho to Tokyo so that he could achieve his dreams. I tried to be supportive of him, I even badmouthed Ren Tsuruga who was my brother with a stage name for him, but he never appreciated my support and continued to ignore my existence. That's why, after a talk with my big brother, I died my hair back to blond and, leaving only a message to Sho, I left and followed my brother to my new apartment. It was time to leave Kyoko Mogami behind and become Kyoko Hizuri, daughter to Juliena and Kuu Hizuri, famous actress and actor and sister to Kuon Hizuri or else Ren Tsuruga, another famous actor. Of course, to the world I would continue being Kyoko Mogami, at least until I earned the showbiz world's respect.

Today, I am going through audition to enter the same company as my brother, and currently it is my interview. "So Mogami – san, why do you want to enter the LME Company?" President Takarada asked me and I gave a small smile, knowing that if I hadn't met my real family when I was seven, I would have said revenge.

"Ever since I was seven years old, I had a love of acting. However, I wanted to support my fiancé during his attempts to achieve his dreams, so I put my dream aside. But I found recently that he has been cheating on me, so I left him until he truly finds out what is important. I also thought I could take this chance to make my dreams of becoming an actress true."

President Takarada blinked at my answer and asked me hesitantly. "You are only sixteen right? Yet you have a fiancé?" I laughed softly and it seemed the sound captivated the other two male judges. "I have been engaged to him since I was six, sir. But I don't mind since I love him with all my heart."

"So you're not bitter about his cheating ways?" The male at the president's right asked surprised. I shook my head negatively. "No. we are both young and I always knew he didn't see me that way. But that doesn't mean I can't take my revenge by making him jealous. Of course, I know we will marry in the end, after all, we can't break the engagement off."

President Takarada asked a little harshly. "Do you plan to make another man a victim to you while you know that he won't be able to have you?" I shook my head negatively again. "The person that will help me make him jealous is my older brother, but since my fiancé never knew I had a brother, it will work perfectly."

The president relaxed a bit and then asked me: "Brother?" "Yes, my brother is in showbiz but I would like to keep his identity secret." The president nodded and I tensed a bit as I knew that this would be when he would ask me to act something.

"Well, as you seem such a kind girl, I would like you to act like a scorned woman who discovered her boyfriend was cheating on her. I realize that this might be hitting too close to home but…" I shook my head and smiled. "Don't worry president Takarada, my fiancé's ways don't bother me anymore."

With that I stood up, closed my eyes and took a deep breath, shoving away my personality and allowing the scorned woman to come to the surface. Glaring at absolutely nothing, I started speaking in a low, dark tone. "How dare you? I gave you everything, I quit high school for you, I didn't chase my dream for you, I became your crutch for everything and this is how you repay me?" I act like I am grabbing a glass of water and throwing it all over him. "You will pay. I will take my revenge on you no matter what and then you'll be begging me to take you back like the dog you are but you are never getting me back, you hear me? Never." With that I turn on my heel and bang the 'door' before I turn to the judges and bow.

"This is the end, sirs." The president and the other two judges stared at me like I was an alien. "You're hired!" president Takarada shouted excitedly and started dancing like crazy. I smile really brightly at that. "Thank you!" With that I bowed and after getting the meeting time for tomorrow, I walk out in order to call my brother and tell him the good news.

I take out my cellphone and dial his number. "Yes?" I hear his dark and powerful voice saying. "Ah, onii – sama? I passed! I am from now on your junior!" I hear him laugh in happiness and I swell up with pride. "Is that so? I am so glad for you! Well, as an up – and – coming actress I can't have you walk around in those rags you bought to hide your real family while you stayed with that man. I am taking you in the afternoon to upgrade your wardrobe. Don't forget to call mom and dad!" I blush at that and murmur an answer. "What did you say?" I take a big breath and calmly tell him again. "I said I planned on telling them over Skype."

My brother laughs at that and I blush again. "Mou, onii – sama, stop teasing me! Anyway, I will be waiting for you in my apartment. I got to go now, take care and don't forget to eat!" With that, I hang up and start my way to home, planning on removing the wig I wore in order to hide my hair, not having the courage to dye my hair again after I cut out all the dyed hair. What I didn't know however, was that Sho had returned to his home and found that I had left…

End of Kyoko's P.O.V

Start of Sho's P.O.V

I opened the door to the apartment I shared with my fiancé, feeling guilty at the fact that I had cheated on her again, despite everything that she had done for me. "I am home!" I called out to her, but only darkness and silence greeted me. Worried beyond anything now, I open the lights and notice an envelope on the counter. Seeing that my name was on it, I opened it and started reading.

Dear Sho,

I am feeling a bit guilty as I am writing this letter, knowing that I should have told you this to your face, but I didn't have the courage to wait for God knows how many more days all alone in this empty apartment, waiting for you.

I know you think that I am oblivious to your cheating ways, but I always knew. I thought that if I waited patiently for you, that you would stop this and come back to me, but I can't stand it anymore. So I decided to leave to achieve my dream, and maybe also find someone who will appreciate me for me.

Don't worry, I know just as well as you do that we will have to get married before our twentieth year, but that doesn't mean I can't play around a little, just like you did. Of course, I don't expect you to feel guilty at all for what you have done. Actually I am completely certain that you will continue your ways of charming and dating every beautiful girl there is out there in the showbiz world.

Well, I guess I will meet you there, as I am planning to become an actress, just like I have always dreamed, not that you know about that of course. Ever since you were six, you only think of yourself, and that's fine, because until we get married, I will only think of myself as well.

I hope you have fun with your freedom! I know I certainly will.

Goodbye for now,

Your fiancé.

P.S. The apartment is paid for until September 30th. After that, it's your responsibility.

I slide down the floor and without noticing, tears start running down my face. I never expected Kyoko to leave, I always thought she's be here with me. But I didn't even know her dream of becoming an actress! I am such a horrible fiancé. And not only that, but she knew I was cheating on her and she plans on finding someone else, at least until we get married!

My tears continued running down my face and suddenly I realized why I was so sad. I was in love with Kyoko Mogami and I had just lost her. 'No.' I thought to myself. 'I haven't lost her yet. I have to win her back, at any cost. I love her after all.'

And with that, I stood up and called Shouko, my manager. "Shouko? Call all of my 'girlfriends'" here I gave a little sneer. The only one who deserved that title was Kyoko and I had betrayed her. "and tell them that we are over. There is only one girl for me and I don't plan on betraying her anymore."

With that, I hang up and started planning my next move. 'I know Kyoko loves my songs.' I thought to myself. 'And her favorite was the one I wrote for her when I was seven. The only song I wrote for her. Perhaps it's time to write another song for her. One that will be hiding a meaning only she would get.'

And with that last thought, I took out a notebook and a pen and started writing that special song, one that I would release almost immediately after 'Prisoner.' And that's when another thought hit me. I would have Shouko watch out for her debut and then I would ask her to request her for the video clip. Along with Minori unfortunately, a girl in love with me, but who I never touched. And this time, I needed to make clear that I wasn't interested in her. The only one I love is Kyoko and that's how it will always be.

END OF CHAPTER 1

Author's note: So, tell me, how was it? Bad? Good? Please leave me a message to tell me. Oh, I am also planning to write an omake after every chapter so please tell me requests you have for them. Here's the first one

Omake: Ren's reaction

I gaze at the stars and try to hold back my anger. Sho Fuwa didn't deserve my sister's love, not after everything he had done to her. I have to crush him and make him despair of ever getting Kyoko back, I have to make him bleed for one last chance with her. She is my precious sister and I never did forgive him for stealing her away from me all those years ago when she refused to come with us in order to stay and support this idiot. Suddenly, I got an idea. I will make the president tell me all her jobs and call her every time until he hears her talking to me in a familiar tone. Yes, this was perfect.

THE END

Anyone else loves the idea of Ren as an overprotective jealous brother with a sister complex? I do. I hoped you enjoyed this chapter and omake!