A/N: Chloe is OC in the story...but its interesting, I promise.
Disclaimer: If I owned Smallville, Chloe and Clark would have been MARRIED by now!
..:One:..
I open the door to my house and step in.Its empty, and it always is, ever since my dad was killed. The house is very neat though, but then again, I wouldnt even say I live in it anymore.
I get up, go to school, come home, go to bed and cry myself to sleep.
But, I have recently found a way to stop the crying, releasing the pain I have been going through for what seems like centuries. I dont like to speak to anyone about it though. No one needs to know. But I dont even think anyone notices. Sure, Clark pulls the usual 'how are you holding up' bit and 'I'm here for you.' I dont tell him though...about what I do. He doesnt need to know, he doesnt even really care anyways.
He's to busy with Lana, staring at her from afar.
I slam the door closed and drop my backpack to the floor.
I am in this world alone. I have no one. I can feel the pain inside me, growing. Will it ever go away?
I need to forget about that awful day. But I can't. I relive that day over and over, day after day. And then when I feel that im about to snap, I release the pain. Let it out.I bleed itout.
Yes, now you know my secret. I cut myself.
And today, I think I had one of the most worst days. And I am finally going to do it. Im going to end this terrible cycle.
I lock myself in the bathroom, get the peice of cloth that holds my weapon of choice. It's in the second drawer. When I unravel it, theres a blade. A sharp one. It's like my drug, the way I get high, the way I forget my pain. It's the only way to these days.
I move toward the bathtub slowly, and turn it on with shaking hands, using alot of the hot water.
They say you get very cold when you start slipping away...
I put the blade on the counter and start to peel of my clothing, gazing at myself in the full length mirror. I've lost so much weight since my dad died. I cant beleive no one has noticed the pain I have been dealing with.
I guess it just shows how much they pay attention.
I put one foot in the tub. Its nice and warm. It will be the last pleasure of my pathetic life.
I sit, imagining the hot water washing away my pain.I dont bother turning off the water. It will just go cold and I will die cold, and I dont want that.
I take one deep breath and reach for the cold, steal blade. I notice some dried blood on the edge from when I last used it. I close my eyes and take another deep breath.
Just end this pathetic life you live Chloe! No one loves you. You fathers dead, Clark's to busy daydreaming about a girl he will never have to see you and your pain. Pete moved away,so, who does that leave? Nobody.No one is there for you Chloe. No one cares.
I look at my arms. There covered with scars. But, that won't matter soon, because I will be dead. I will leave this body. I will be reborn.
I decide to start with my right wrist. I position the blade to where I want it and start adding preasure. I tell myself to drag it. Just one quick swipe. End this pathetic life where there is no one to care about me.
Okay Chloe, on the count of three...One, two, three SWIPE!
But I dont. My hand starts shaking violently and the blade falls in the water. I start to cry. I am soonblinded by my tears. I sit up straight and turn of the water which has begun to overflow and fall to the floor.
I didnt do it. All that for nothing.
STUPID SILLY GIRL!
I quickly get out of the tub and dry myself off. I throw on a bathrobe, unlock the bathroom door and walk to the living room, leaving wet footsteps behind.
I get the the living room which is quite dark. I slow my pace, waiting for my vision to adgust. When it does, I open a cabinet which contains alcohol beverages. I grab the first thing my hands touches and I pull it out.
Vodka, half full. Perfect.
Its my second choice besides the cutting. It helps me forget, but I dont like it because when I wake up, I have the most terrible headaches.
I sigh. Its better than nothing. I get comfortable on the couch and take the cap off of the bottle.
'Just let me forget.' I think and take a swig from the bottle. 'Thats all I want to do. Forget.'
o.O.o
A/N: Reviews please. It would be greatly appreciated. CHLARK will be coming as soon as possible. Well see how the story develops.
