A/N: Songfic to Tonight by FM Static. Reviews but please no flames.


It was his fault. All his fault.

She died because of him.

It was all his fault.

They had gotten into a huge fight about the stupidest thing that he couldn't even remember now. Something about her flirting with other boys. Thinking back, he knew she didn't. She never would. But he had loved her so much; it made him burn up with jealously every time another guy even glanced her way.

She had stormed off on her bike in the dead of night. He bet she didn't even hear the car behind her through her bawling.

I remember the times we spent together

on those drives

we had a million questions

all about our lives

and when we got to New York

everything felt right

I wish you were here with me

tonight

They spent every single second possible together. They completed each other. He never imagined her gone, and now that she was it felt like a knife in his heart. No scratch that. He didn't have a heart. Not since he let her go that night.

I remember the days we spent together

were not enough

and it used to feel like dreamin'

except we always woke up

Never thought not having you

here now would hurt so much

Eli closed his eyes and buried his face into his pillow. He could feel the tears brimming in his eyes. They started to fall down his face and get lost in the pillow. Soon the tears turned to full-blown, shaking sobs, and his pillow was soaked. He moaned and threw it against the window. The night sky outside was blurred through his tears.

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up

I need your loving hands to come and pick me up

And every night I miss you

I can just look up

and know the stars are

holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight

He never really believed in anything until he met Julia in the 9th grade. They were talking about different religions in his World History class. He had brought up atheism, which was probably the best mistake he ever made. Eli smiled now thinking about it. Julia had spun around in her seat with the saddest expression on her face.

"Come to church with me on Sunday," were the first words she ever said to him. He refused, but she had persisted and that led to more and more conversations, most taking place late at night on the hood of his car. Wrapped in sweatshirts with Starbucks coffee warming their hands, Julia and Eli had gotten to know each other, and eventually fell for one another. They brought out the best in each other; literally one another's better half. Julia kept Eli positive and upbeat, and Eli kept Julia down-to-earth and logical.

I remember the time you told me about when you were eight

And all those things you said that night that just couldn't wait

I remember the car you were last seen in

and the games we would play

All the times we spilled our coffees

and stayed out way too late

I remember the time you told me about your Jesus

and how not to look back even if no one believes us

When it hurt so bad sometimes

not having you here...

But he was stupid. He threw away the best thing God had ever given him. Now he was left with nothing except a broken heart and tear-stained pillow.

Eli sighed as he studied the stars. They used to find the constellations together and make up new stories about them. Julia once told a tale about Cancer the Crab. Instead of distracting Hercules, Cancer got sidetracked at a Starbucks. He discovered Caramel Macchiato, Cinnamon Dolce Latte, and Dark Chocolate Peppermint Mocha, all of Julia's favorites. So that's why Hercules defeated the Hydra so easily. Hera, the goddess who placed Cancer in the sky, was also at the Starbucks. She felt bad for the Crab, and that's why he ended up residing in the night sky with all of the warriors.

Eli had been rolling on the ground laughing hysterically by the time the story was over.

He smiled through his tears. They had some amazing nights together.

I sing,

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up

I need your loving hands to come and pick me up

And every night I miss you

I can just look up

and know the stars are

holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight

The stars twinkled outside his window. A few more tears fell. He remembered running his fingers through her hair… kissing her soft neck… the way her fingers felt as they traced the lines on his palms… moments that just left him breathless.

But as Eli learned the hard way, there were two different kinds of breathless. The romantic type that left you wanting more, and then the sort of breathless he felt when he heard the terrible news. The kind that felt like you were being punched in the gut, the one that made your head spin and you feel like you're going to puke. What he was feeling this very moment.

Eli sunk to his knees. "Julia, I need you. Please, help me tonight." And the tears continued to fall.

I sing,

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up

I need your loving hands to come and pick me up

And every night I miss you

I can just look up

and know the stars are

holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight A/N: I know it's kind of piece-y, but that's how I wanted it. And in Alberta, drivers get their permits at 14, I believe? So yes, it does make sense for a freshman to have a car.


With love,

Horizontal_stripes43