Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.
This story may be quite OOC.
X-
He sits quietly next to him, understanding that the nation next to him was very much in need of a person. Anyone that understood them, that actually went through the same thing.
Well, ex-nation, but he finds that there was no specific need to bring that up as he still technically was a nation, if only a former one.
Prussia finds the oriental figure next to him a really good listener.
He didn't really remember when he found out, or how, but he knew that it happened after another day of listening to those voices telling him that he was useless, not a nation anymore, and all the things that hurt.
He was insane.
He never told anyone, he just knew he was. He didn't want to go to some stupid therapist or something. So he his the fact that he, the awesome Prussia, could hear voices.
Some awesome nation he was.
Then he laughs bitterly as he realizes he wasn't a nation and he remembers everything that happened previously the day before in the world meeting in Germany and soon the laughter is some sort of crying of an agonized person trying to sound happy, in which he was doing. The person that sighs softly next to him is not fooled at all, and Prussia is grateful that China was not one of those people that immediately hugged you and whispered comforting words in your ear when all you needed was just someone to hold you, to show that you were not alone.
Although he most definitely is.
Soon his crying has subsided into something quieter, but equally sad. It is then that he feels himself pulled into a warm hug, and he is held as he listens to leaves dance around in the wind outside the calm house, trying to forget.
The voices then return, whispering such discouraging words to him as he feels himself let go of. Then soon, a hand gently wipes away his tears and a cup of warm tea is brought to his dry lips. Not hot, but warm tea.
It has practically become tradition for him to visit the third largest country in the world. It always started with something hurtful, then Prussia would fly all the way over there, and he would be a sobbing wreck, and totally unawesome.
Unawesome. He was already unawesome.
Those are the words of a small dainty voice as it giggles, leaving behind echoes as they ring in his mind.
He starts crying harder at how hopeless he was, and he is pulled into another hug, and it still surprises him how firm the grip around him is, coming from such a small and weak looking figure, but looks could be deceiving.
The sobs slowly turn into small hiccups and sniffles, and he sounded like such a kid.
He hates how helpless he is. How useless he is. But it makes him feel better that he doesn't have to act so strong all the time, and remain the cocky bastard he was. He already knew what people thought of him, but here was someone that really knew what the real Gilbert was like. Someone utterly useless and a waste of space.
It feels like hours, him just crying into the arms of a old nation. Soon, it is hours. A soft voice suddenly speaks.
"Do you want to talk about it aru?"
It sounded like words from a wise old man, aside from the accent China had when speaking any other language. It was sort of funny, but they long got past laughing at it.
"Nein."
Having a small understanding of German, the Chinese nation nodded.
"Do you want to stay over tonight then aru?"
"Ja."
So the Chinese man stands up, giving a brief nod to him before walking away to the kitchen as Prussia went to his reserved room.
It didn't have a nametag, as Prussia wanted this to be kept secret for obvious reasons, and China didn't mind at all. The room itself was like a grand guestroom, but Prussia knew where to look for special things done for him. Like how there were no teabags in the room, or tea leaves. China would always specially make some for him. Another thing was how under the bed, there was an extra pillow, soft with silk covers, and it had a small yellow bird on it.
Prussia grabbed that pillow and he dumped it on the bed before laying down and sighing.
The voices never bothered him during these moments, only when he was feeling sad, or when hurtful words were already said to add more hurt into them.
They had gotten less bothersome ever since he started visiting China, but they were still there.
There is a light knock on the door, taking Prussia away from his thoughts.
The door opened without waiting for a reply, and then there was China, nodding at him with a small smile as he revealed a tray full of Chinese foods.
"I am sorry that I have not mastered German cuisine, but I will attempt to learn in the near future aru. For now, please enjoy some of my country's dishes aru. I think you must be famished aru."
Prussia agreed gratefully, taking in the scents of the steaming hot dishes in front of him.
"Sorry they are not top quality foods as I have not gone shopping yet recently, and have not many options."
"Its okay, I am ze one coming here without calling ahead of time."
Prussia never called. He never needed to either. Most of their meetings consisted of him being comforted as he cried about being an ex-nation, and the voices.
Honestly, he came here a lot. To the point where he had his own personal airplane that China had gifted him with, and a pilot that was willing to take him back and forth as needed. The pilot could speak German fluently, and his Chinese was pretty good.
That was how Prussia got here.
"Well that's okay then aru. I have just been informed of a meeting that will be happening in a week in England, and I think it would be okay for you to attend aru." China knew he would go to them anyways because he didn't want to be left out of anything. That was how Prussia knew about meetings, even when Germany never told him about them. He still wanted to go, when only insults and pain came with them.
"Okay."
"I would like to know how long you will be staying here aru. You are welcome to stay here as long as you wish aru."
"I don't know."
"That is fine aru."
Soon he begins eating the food he was given, and the day ends with him staring up at the ceiling with moonlight reflecting off of it from his bed, and China sitting next to him, calmly sipping tea and watching the moon outside. Soon he falls asleep, and when he wakes up, all that is left is the scent of tea that seemed to linger everywhere, but stronger wherever China was physically standing.
X-
Prussia had returned home the following day, in a better mood, and had bothered his bruder again as usual.
Nothing had changed really. And since he wasn't with the only person that could actually help him, the voices only got more annoying.
He really thought he would be used to them by now, yet that did not seem to be the case.
He went to hang out with Spain and France again, but he didn't really feel like the BTT meant anything anymore, with them only getting annoyed. He is walking away, back to the airport, away from Spain, as he hears a disgusted voice whisper, "annoying and useless bother."
He doesn't freeze up. He continues walking like the strong nation he was. He could still hold his head high, because it didn't matter.
Although no one could deny the tears flowing freely down his pale cheeks, his bangs covering his eyes, and all you could see was a smile that was trying to reassure the person smiling that he was awesome.
He was.
But why did everything and everyone else say otherwise?
X-
Prussia stared ahead at the yellow bird in the cage, head resting on his crossed arms.
He rarely saw his bird anymore, and he just didn't need Gilbird anymore.
He was an awesome bird, but he had an unawesome owner.
He was awesome, he wanted to tell himself.
But it just didn't work anymore.
X-
China smiles brightly at Japan, smiling at the nation that was looking uncomfortable and was practically ignoring him.
He frowns at the fights occurring all over the room.
"Everyone calm down aru! I'll give you some free snacks, so you should calm down aru!"
As usual, he was denied.
He sees Prussia out of the corner of his eyes, yelling with other nations.
He frowns, listening closer, and soon the whole room is focused on Prussia.
"Why are you even here?!"
"I'm still east Germany! I could still attend these meetings!"
"What's the point anyways?! You can't even do a thing! You're useless!"
China froze up on he word, carefully studying a certain silver haired nation. Useless was one of the words he absolutely despised, and it always threw him into a long crying session. Prussia asked him not to react to anything, or do anything during meetings, but that didn't mean he wasn't prepared. This time though, Prussia was different.
"I know I'm useless! I know I can't do a thing! I would try, but you won't even let me!"
America rolls his eyes.
"A hero always has to be the hero! Normal civilians are supposed to be the ones that heroes save!"
"Wonderful job you are doing," Prussia bitterly said.
"What good could you be anyways? You are supposed to be dead! You don't even exist anymore! So why are you still here?"
China was inching out of his chair at this point.
"Maybe I would be better off dead anyways."
He was ready to whack everyone that was screaming at Prussia with his wok.
"Why couldn't you have died long ago anyways, and save us the trouble?!"
Prussia was quivering, and tears were just barely visible in his eyes.
China bit his lip as he tried to stop himself from going crazy. But he couldn't leave Prussia there.
"Useless ex-nation."
It was at this point that Prussia made his quiet exit. China followed him with his eyes.
"We could do much better without him." England sighed. "He is such an annoyance."
It is then that everyone decides to take a lunch break, and China is the first out of the door.
He glances around, wondering where Prussia could be. He would probably be in a isolated place.
So China heads up to the roof, and sure enough, he finds a silver haired nation quietly crying, sitting dangerously close to the edge of the fourteen story building.
"Should I just die now?"
China does not say anything, only hugging the taller nation as he felt tears stain his white shirt.
It is awhile before any of them speak.
"It is not correct to do that aru. Life is a valuable thing."
"But haven't you ever wished that you could die?"
He smiles softly, arms still wrapped around the thin, quivering figure.
"Many times aru. But I have learned over time how precious life is, and even more so that I am a nation aru."
"But I'm not a nation."
He pulls away, gently dabbing away all the tears shed by the crying man.
"Yes you are aru. You may be an ex-nation, but you are still a nation aru. And you are still alive aru."
This only prompts more tears.
Soon when he is out of tears, which is fifteen or so minutes later, Prussia falls asleep, tear stains standing out on his pale skin. China, being the third largest country in the world, managed to carry him into one of the rooms.
"Good night aru."
He gently shuts the door behind him.
