A/N: This fic contains my first published attempt at smut, enjoy :)
Dearly Departed
He couldn't believe her! They were having such a great morning, snuggling in bed and sharing lazy kisses, and then she just had to ruin it. A stray comment about a possible case developed into an argument that ended with Kevin storming out the door as she pleaded for him to stay. Now he's running around the neighborhood to work off his frustration. Luckily, he had dressed appropriately before he left since it's almost single digits right now.
They live in a nice neighborhood where the sidewalks are meticulously kept snow and ice free, so he doesn't have to worry about slipping as his feet pound the concrete. She promised to cut back and never go on a case alone, but obviously she lied. She's taken solo hunts and has barely reduced the number of hunts. I know she's been sneaking out on some when she thinks I won't notice, but she can't hide the injuries no matter how fast she heals. Kevin thinks furiously. Now she wants to go on another case by herself right after the holidays. Am I not good enough? Why does she feel the need to hunt all the time? We were together long before the Winchesters finally let her tag along. I was there for her when she got powers, when she died and came back temporarily blind, and when she was kicked out with nowhere to go.
After about an hour of this, he begins to calm down and realize he just ran out on his fiancé on Christmas. He smiles as he remembers the first Christmas they spent together. He hasn't seen that unique twinkle in her eyes since then. Mentally slapping himself for being so selfish, he turns on his heels and heads back home.
As he runs, he begins to feel off. His breath is shorter than it should be considering he takes long runs often. His heart is also out of rhythm, like it was knocked off center. Suddenly, he feels a sharp pain in his chest and his steps falter. He falls to the ground and realizes he's dying. He has enough time to regret how he left Cat before he sees a figure that wasn't there before.
"Are you a reaper?" he asks the mysterious woman.
"Yes, Kevin Tran. I've come to help you move on." she tells him, no emotion on her face.
He turns and looks at where his body is sprawled on the sidewalk. "I didn't get to apologize." he sighs sadly. He knows Cat will blame herself for his death and worries about what she'll do when she finds out. From knowing her the past years, he knows she won't handle it well and will most likely try to disappear. He prays for her safety before turning back to the reaper. She holds her hand out and he takes it.
He suddenly finds himself in Garth's houseboat. He hears the secret knock and cautiously opens the door, holy water in hand. When he sees a younger and extremely exhausted version of Cat, he realizes he must be in Heaven. He remembers hearing about Heaven being a trip down memory lane, and this is definitely a good one.
He remembers this moment, the first time they ever met. He had acted standoffish and annoyed at first, not wanting to get attached to the beautiful girl who just swept into his life. He had been distracted as she had sat down and read. His eyes followed her hand as she had to brush her long dark hair out of her eyes every so often. He had caught himself staring at her soft full lips a few times as she would sometimes mouth what she was reading. Her laughter had caused his heart to flutter and he knew he was screwed.
The scene shifts and now they're at the little diner where she first started telling him her story and when he began to fall head over heels in love with her. Reliving her animated storytelling causes a pang in his heart. He misses those carefree days when it was just the two of them and there was much less baggage between them.
He relives all her visits to the houseboat, remembering how they had warmed up to each other. He had quickly stopped trying to push her away with rudeness after he realized it was too late to not fall for her. He recalls admitting to this after they were officially together and they had laughed at how foolish he had been.
Soon he's to the night where everything changed for both of them, the night he held her as they just talked about anything and everything after her nightmare. He wonders if they'll come back now that he's gone. He hopes, for her sake, that she returns to her brothers. If anyone can take care of her now, it's them. He listens with the same rapt attention he always has as she reveals some of her past to him. He knows now that she isn't big on sharing anything about herself and the Before as she calls it. As her soft melodic voice floats through the air in song, he remembers that it was that exact moment that he realized she was the one.
He already knew he loved her, but at that moment he realized he would only ever love her. He smiles when he remembers her admission that this moment was when she discovered she was in love with him too. It had all moved so fast for them, but that's how love works.
The kiss is just as amazing the second time, all sweet passion and her soft lips. He's spared reliving her terrifying transformation as the surroundings ripple before he's laying in Cat's bed, Cat snuggled up against him. He thinks this might be the day she returned after running away. His thoughts are confirmed when Dean barges in and he and Cat harass each other. He's then hit with why this would make the highlight reel. This is the morning when she first tells him she loves him.
He gets swept up in the moment, the same rush of emotions flooding his senses as soon as he hears those three words. The heated passion of this kiss is in stark contrast to the sweet slow kiss he had just experienced. This kiss is full of wandering lips and hands. He gets turned on all over again at Cat's small gasp when he pulls on her hair and thrusts his tongue into her mouth.
He remembers having to restrain his urge to grind against her as he had crowded up against her. She tastes like chocolate and something almost minty. He moans at the taste, something he knows is uniquely her. No matter how many times they've kissed, that flavor is always there. He releases her lips and begins kissing down her jaw and neck, causing her to gasp and moan as he sucks on her sensitive spots.
While he's driving her crazy with his lips, he moves his hands from her hair and slowly runs them down her body. Her back is toned and he's tempted to pause when he feels the swell of her soft breasts, but past him had kept going, so he continues down. He traces her curves and feels the firmness of her stomach, toned from all her training. When he reaches the hem of her shirt, he watches the scene dissolve before she has her panic attack.
He once again finds himself in bed with her, and when she opens her eyes, he realizes this must be post-Purgatory. He feels bad that such a terrible time for her is actually one of his happier memories, but for the first time she had actually needed him. She has always been independent so those few weeks when she relied on him were special to him. As he helps her into the bath, he remembers how much he had wanted to kiss her scars. Every time he saw them, he was reminded that this amazing woman sacrificed herself for him. It was the ultimate expression of love and all he wanted to do was show her how much he loved her in return.
He had finally gotten that chance when he found her dancing in her room one day. It had felt so right to have her in his arms as they swayed together through the five songs. She had looked so happy, the happiest he had seen her since Purgatory.
She didn't talk about that time very much with him. Dean knows everything, having lived there for a year himself, and she often went to him when it overwhelmed her. Sam had told him about how she had been covered in injuries when they had found her, but he had also told of her impressive fighting skills.
He lives through all their various dates and that wonderful Christmas. He realizes that all his good memories are centered around Cat and that just makes him feel worse about how he left her. He has no idea how long it's been since he ran out on her, there's no concept of time here. Soon he finds himself immersed in the weeks of domestic bliss when she first came to live with him. He remembers thinking how great she looked in his bed, in his kitchen cooking dinner, and in his arms on the couch as they cuddled and watched TV.
The nights of heated kisses and mornings of lazy lips sliding against each other are something he will always savor. However, there's one memory in particular that he's anxiously anticipating. Finally, he finds himself in the snowy park where he had proposed. She had looked so beautiful with the twinkling Christmas displays shining in her eyes and her cheeks rosy from the cold. He had actually had that ring for months, but it never seemed like the right time.
She yanks him up by his scarf and smashes their lips together before pulling back enough to enthusiastically say, "Yes! Of course I want to spend the rest of my life with you!" He pulls her into another quick kiss, not wanting to make out in public, then slips the simple band on her finger. She then grabs his hand and they stumble home giddily.
As soon as the door shuts behind them, Kevin pushes Cat against it and finally kisses her like he had been wanting to. She melts under him, groaning in pleasure at the slick slide of their tongues. Soon they are shedding their coats and scarves, letting them puddle on the floor as Cat's hands settle in his hair while he slowly moves his lips down her neck, sucking a few bruises in her most sensitive spots. She groans and yanks him back up into a passionate kiss, nipping his lip before pulling back and panting, "Bedroom."
They had made out like this before so he hadn't thought anything of it at the time. They make their way up the stairs, still attached at the lips. He kicks the door closed behind him then Cat grabs his sweater and pulls it over his head. As soon as it's free from his arms, she reaches for her own, post-Purgatory baths had conquered her fear of being exposed to him. He immediately pulls her back into a kiss, savoring the feeling of warm skin on skin. He reaches back and unhooks her bra before backing her toward the bed. With the bra on the floor, she willingly falls back onto their bed.
The vision of her pale skin and dark hair spread across the deep blue comforter is something he'll never forget, no matter how many times they'd done it, it never failed to take his breath away. He removes his pants, leaving him in just his black boxers before joining her on the bed. He starts to kiss his way up her stomach, rediscovering every spot that makes her gasp or writhe under him. When he reaches her breasts, he sucks one nipple in his mouth while massaging the other with his hand. He had discovered quickly that Cat has sensitive nipples and always made sure to take advantage of that.
Her hands rest on his back and he can feel a slight sting as his ministrations cause her to dig her nails in. He remembers how contrite she had been the first time she had scratched him, but he had just kissed her and told her he liked bearing her marks. Suddenly, he feels the world tilt as she flips them over. He never told her, but every time she overpowered him like that, it went straight south. She wastes no time in peppering his chest in kisses, sucking on his collarbone and the dip where his neck meets his shoulder.
His hands run up and down her back before reaching her waistband and following it to the front. He pops the button and pulls down the zipper before she helps with shimmying out of her pants. He takes in her white lace panties and runs his hands up her inner thighs. He then grabs her ass, bringing her in for another heated kiss. When he squeezes it, he gets another moan. By this time he's fully hard and flips them so she's underneath him again and continues to assault her with kisses as he starts to grind against her, eliciting another gasp in response to his own groan.
It had taken time for them to reach that point. She still refused for him to touch her where he knew she would get the most pleasure, but he'd been patient. When she had told him about everything those guys had done, he had been furious. He knew it would just take time for her to be comfortable, so they had been slowly building up. It was only about a month or two ago that she had finally allowed for them both to be naked while making out and only a few weeks after, she had given him an amazing hand job.
He feels her hands move to the waistband of his boxers and push them down. Soon they're both completely stripped of clothing and just look over each other. Her skin is smooth and flawless, her Grace causing all injuries to heal with no marks left behind. She shivers as he runs his hand over the miles of pale skin under him, staying clear of her wet folds, unwilling to cause her any distress. To his surprise, she actually grabs his wrist as he continues down her inner thighs.
He looks at her questioningly and sees the nervousness and determination in her eyes as she slowly pulls his hand and releases it just shy of the warm heat of her core. "Are you sure? We don't have to go any further if you're not ready." he'd assures her, but she's adamant.
The first dip of his fingers into that wet heat triggers a groan from both of them. He takes his time and covers her in kisses and reassurances as she finally starts to relax and writhe underneath him with just two fingers thrusting in and out of her, his thumb brushing her sensitive bud every so often. She begs for more, so he adds a third finger in, keeping a steady and slow rhythm as he starts stretching her open. He didn't even entertain the idea they'd go further, it's purely for her pleasure.
He'd been shocked when she'd gasped out, "Need you…inside me…now". He'd searched her face and saw the fear he expected, but also so much trust it'd warmed his heart. He tried to talk her out of it, but she refused.
"We don't have any condoms." he'd finally used as a last resort, his will quickly crumbling. He wants nothing more than to make love to his gorgeous fiancé, to feel the tight heat wrap around his achingly hard cock, but he also cares about her wellbeing. Kevin is expecting all this, having lived through it, but it still amazes him that she trusted him so much that she overcame her fear.
"Kev, I can't get pregnant and we're both clean. Please, I want this with you." He had melted at that and Kevin finally gets to slowly enter her tight hole. She tenses and her breathing speeds up, but with the help of kisses and murmurs, she becomes loose and pliant underneath him once again. He knew it wouldn't go completely smoothly, but after that initial panic, the room is just full of groans, moans, and the sound of skin slapping together.
It wasn't a quick roll in the hay, it was slow and passionate love making that night, something he duplicates in his memory. He watches her fall apart under him and hears his name as she lets the pleasure sweep her away in an intense orgasm. The pulsing of her walls quickly pulls him over the edge and he shoots deep inside her core as he moans her name. When they both come down from their respective orgasms, he rolls off her and pulls her tight against him. "I'll never hurt you, Cat, I promise."
"I know, Kev. I love you so much. Thank you for helping me get over my fears." she responds with a sated and tired voice. They'd quickly fallen asleep and the days continued like normal afterwards. He'd wanted to wait, to give her time to adjust to the new direction of their relationship and now they'll only ever have that one night.
One morning he wakes up and is confused to be alone. He gets up and pulls on some pants and a plain red t-shirt before going to find Cat. He doesn't know what morning this is, he'd always woken up with her in his arms. As he walks down the stairs, there's a knock on the door. Glad he had the forethought to get dressed first, he answers the door.
He's filled with profound sadness and joy as he sees a slightly older Cat standing there with a hopeful expression on her face that transforms into pure happiness as she throws herself into his arms and starts crying. He wraps her up in his arms, pulling her further into the house and closing the door. Just before it shuts, he sees a man with tousled brown hair and a soft smile on his face before he disappears.
