This story is the result of way too much time on Ming Ming's and My hands. We were bored one day saying random things, and this is the result. The story idea is Dreema's so if you like it, send her a message. Her screen name here at is dreemaazaleiawingblade.
Well, here it goes!
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter! Are you happy now! Making me admit this truth that breaks my poor, fragile, sensitive little heart?
Harry: Your heart may be lots of things, but fragile and sensitive are not two of them.
K.L.: Shush you, or I'll seek Draco after you again.
Harry: gulps and shuts up
K.L.: HA! You made a sound! Draco!
Harry:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Draco: MY LOVE, WHERE ARE YOU!
Harry: I hate you with a passion…
K.L.: I know. Now I suggest you run, because Drakie is getting closer.
Harry: runs for his life with Draco right on his heels
K.L.: Ah, don't you love the smell of yaoi in the morning? Ming Ming is going to kill me when she reads this…
PODER PERRUNO!
By: K.L. Bloodfang and Dreema Azaleia Wingblade
Chapter 1: Super Sirius!
Our story begins at the end of Final Battle between Voldemort and Harry. Why not at the beginning? Because I got here late okay! The invitation said 9:00 p.m. Thursday and they began on Tuesday! Never trust Neville to tell you anything right! Anywho… Where was I? Oh yeah…
Harry had fought a very valiant bout. For three days he battled the Dark Lord Voldemort, for three days he managed to keep him at bay, for three days he didn't went potty… Wait, he didn't went to the bathroom for three days! How he do that? I can't spend more than three HOURS without having to go pee! FOCUS!
But today, the Boy-Who-Lived had finally lost his last bit of strength. Poor Harry laid at Voldemort's feet, battered and bruised, at the Dark Lord's mercy.
"Well, Potter, you have given me a fight worthy of your title, the Chosen One. But still, at long last, you have lost. After all, you are nothing but a mere child and I have years of experience behind me", said the dark Lord at the broken child. At that time Harry looked everywhere behind Voldemort. The Dark Lord stared confusedly at the green-eyed child.
"What? What is it?" he asked.
"Where are they?" answered the boy with another question.
"Where is what?"
"The years of experience? You said you had Years of experience behind you but I don't see them. So, where are they?" Voldemort smacked Harry behind his head and walked in front the boy.
"Very amusing Mr. Potter. This is the end, oh, Chosen One. Say Goodbye!"
Voldemort raised his wand and pointed it at Harry heart. Remus, Dumbledore, Hermione and Ron could just stare helplessly as Voldemort prepared to kill their friend.
"it has been fun, Harry. Avadra Kedav…" A flash of gold and blue slammed against the dark Lord, stopping his curse at the nick of time.
" Not so fast, Lord Moldybutt!" yelled the colourful flash. "I will not allowed you to kill my godson! For I am SUPER PADFFOT! PODER PERRUNO!" yelled Sirius Black with a Puerto Rican accent as he prepared to attack the Dark Lord.
Let's hit the pause button for a second here. Yes, Sirius is back. Sirius Black, now know as Super Padfoot was now a super hero. He wore a yellow spandex suit and blue gloves, boots, cape and briefs. In his chest was a blue paw print with the letters SP written in gold. And…
"Um.. I hate to interrupt, lovely authoress, but can we continue. I don't think we can all keep this poses for long", said Voldy, whose arm was tired of holding up his wand in front of Harry.
Oh fine.. Pussy! Anyway.. Action!
Everyone stared dumbfounded at the new Sirius Black, a.k.a. Super Padfoot.
"Sirius… WHAT THE FUCK, asked Harry. "Care to explain what the hell you are doing?" asked Remus also.
"Hey, aren't you supposed to be dead, anyways?" asked Ron stupidly, which earned him a very good slap behind his head.
"RONALD WEASLEY! That was very inconsiderate!", said his girlfriend, Hermione.
"Sorry…"
"Wait, even if the way he said was beyond tactless, Ron does have a point. Sirius, how can you be here? I saw you fall into the Veil," pointed out Remus to his old friend.
"Well, my dear Moony, when I died I was sent to Heaven but I didn't got in because I caused too much suffering to Snape with my pranks. HA! Suffering my ass! As if he didn't got us back with his own pranks! Anywho… I was sent to Hell for a year, but I annoyed the Hell out of everyone down there so they sent me to Limbo. While I was in Limbo, I got hungry so I ate some of the fluffy cotton candy they had floating around there and the next thing I knew I had super powers! After that, the Higher Forces decided to send me back here because you where in trouble and so here I am! Aren't you glad to see me Harry? Asked Super Padfoot with big, puppy dog eyes, which only caused Harry to sweatdrop even more.
"Yeah, I am. But what's up with the Puerto Rican accent and what does poder perruno mean?", asked Harry to his bizarre godfather.
"Oh, that! I was revived in Puerto Rico and I watched lots of Scooby-Doo episodes in Spanish. That's where I got my catch phrase! Poder Perruno means PUPPY POWER!", answered the happy-go-lucky Super Padfoot, who was right know posing as a super hero in chibi form. Everyone else fell over anime-style. Suddenly an incredibly loud and obnoxious laughter was heard from behind everyone. It was none other than Voldemort himself. The Great Dark Lord lied on his back on the floor, kicking and laughing, like he had never done before.
"HHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He looks so funny! Super Padfoot! Puppy Power! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHA!" said the old Tom between his hysterical laughter. Meanwhile, Remus was walking away from the whole lot of them while chanting "I don't know him; never seen him in my life". Suddenly, Voldemort laughter turn to horrible choking noises and soon there was silence.
What happened? The great Dark Lord, feared by thousands and the torturer of hundreds had died, choking on his own saliva. Harry was slamming his fist on Voldemort's lifeless body. The poor boy was distraught. Hermione walked over her friend and put her hand on his shoulder.
"Harry, why do you cry? Sirius is back and Voldemort died. What on earth has you so upset?" asked the brunette.
"Is that, precisely Hermione. Voldemort died!" answered the black-headed boy. Hermione stared at him wide-eyed, trying to comprehend the boy's words.
"You… are… upset… because… Voldemort… DIED?"
"Exactly! Is so not fair! Sirius, I hate you!" yelled the boy at his godfather. The man, hurt by the words uttered by the one he saw as his own son, could do nothing but cry large waterfall tears.
"Why Harry? Why do you hate me?"
"Because you killed Voldemort. I wanted to kill him!" whined the Chosen One as he had a temper tantrum in front of everyone.
And this is how the Dark Lord came to meet his maker. Yes, he laughed all the way down to Hell. Many say he still laughs to this day.
This is what boredom does to someone. It is a comic look at a possible way for Voldemort to die. I actually have a far different idea of how Voldemort will meet his end. I will also write that one and post it.
