This story is one about death, life and rebirth. It is also supposed to be about hope. It's an old story I thought I lost ages ago I just refound, so here, enjoy. (It was written before Caliborn ripped pages out of the ~ATH book and so he doesn't yet even know Crowbar's crowbar exists.)


The End Ushers In The Beginning.

Lord English towered over them.

Now that they were finally facing off with Death himself, All of this journey, all the fucking pain and agony, all the friends dead because you hadn't been strong enough a leader, all the fucking tears you have shed feel like a total waste of time. You have no way of killing this guy. None. There is no way.

How are you meant to destroy Death itself? Even Jane, with her powers of the Maid of Life was useless in this case. Dirk with his ability to destroy the soul itself was just as useless, as Lord English didn't exactly have one. He just was. Always has been and probably always will be.

You were just going to die. Die like you always were supposed to. Like a coward mutant blooded freak who was capable of nothing. Your eyes fall to the book in one of those huge hands. You'd expect something silly, like Egbert's stupid fucking huge tome of pranks. But you recognise it instantly.

You recognise it, because you used to own it. It is your book, your ~ATH book. The one you had never understood.

Until now. Now it suddenly makes perfect sense. It was the book Rose and Kanaya had written their guide in. The one Gamzee had edited out the parts involving him. Using Equius's blood. The fucking Heir of Void. The blind spots of Doc Scratch and the Felt all had to do with Gamzee. Gamzee was off the radar.

But he had helped them, and you know it now. Lord English held the book, and there was only one way he could have gotten it. With help. You guess Aradia also had something to do with it, seeing as she was the Handmaiden of Death. The Fangirl as they called her.

And it suddenly made sense. So much sense was being made. All the sense.

Facing down death, a conversation you once had with a future/past self of yours, the one in which you changed your text colour to that of candy red, is remembered and you laugh.

You laugh in the face of Death, because suddenly it doesn't matter anymore. Lord English wasn't going to be the one who destroyed you. No. You were luckier than that.

"Oh fucking hell, I get it! I finally fucking get it! It makes so much fucking sense!"

You know that Lord English can't know. Because it was the way, it was the only way. You are the Knight of Blood. You are both Protector and Fighter. Negative and Positive. Hate and Love. Creator and Destroyer. You had fought as hard as you possibly could to keep everyone together, only for things to fall apart and you finally had a way of making it right. You do this one thing, and everything would be forgiven.

Tavros, Feferi, Kanaya, Equius, Nepeta, Eridan, Vriska, Sollux. While Kanaya had come back as a rainbow drinker, and Sollux as a half dead dream bubble freak, it hadn't stopped them from dying to begin with. You had been there to witness both deaths personally.

All you had to do was stop fighting. Give in to the inevitable. Calm the fuck down and accept fate as it was given to you. And for the first time in your life, you know you can.

It was such a fucking relief.

For the first time ever, right here, just before your inevitable, imminent death, you don't hate yourself or what you are. Because you have a purpose. Possibly the biggest purpose anyone has ever had. And that makes you proud. Proud that you could fix so many wrongs. Proud that you could make things better.

You turn to the humans, Kanaya and Terezi who were standing just slightly behind you and Gamzee. "Whatever happens, don't interfere. Any of you. I know what I'm doing. And I really mean that this time, no fake bravado or anything. I know."

Maybe it was the lack of your swearing in that sentence which got everyone to believe you, but whatever it was, it was a damn miracle. They all nodded, some of them quite reluctantly.

You just hope John or Jane doesn't try and do something heroic over this.

Slowly you turn to your Moirail standing silently by your side, his juggling pins held loosely in his hands, knowing they'd be all shades of useless in this fight.

"Thanks for being my Moirail, Gamzee. You were only ever going to be my one quadrant filled. I always wondered why I was always unable to keep a romance, even though I am basically an expert in it. I just wasn't meant anyone but you. Now I get that."

Gamzee sits on the ground and, with a sigh, you join him, lying with your back to his chest. You tilt your head up to look at him and smile. "I'm ready now."

Somehow you manage to stay awake through the pain, though it was bad. Looking down, you see the tip of a red crowbar. You wouldn't survive the attack, you knew that, but you still had a bit of time left. You grin back up at Gamzee.

"You know I forgive you, right? For all of it. Thanks for being my best friend. Even when I was being a total ass to everyone, including you. I just...wanted you to know that. Before... before... I die. Go ahead, my pale bro. Paint your miracles with my blood. Do...what's right. Make...it happen."

You expect Gamzee to do what was normal for him and honk at you, but instead he smiles down at you, and you aren't too sure if he is crying or not, because you are having trouble focusing on anything except his words.

"Got your back, best friend."

You try to laugh at that, as you know it is what you want to do, but instead you just cough up blood. "Got...yours...too. Always." You can't speak anymore. It is getting difficult to breathe, and your vision has now completely gone. For a few more minutes you lie in your moirail's arms and slowly fade.

You are still in that same position the moment you die.

And you remember.

And it begins.

Not for you, and maybe not for your dead friends, but for the others left alive. For the species that can now be made from a null and void game session. You are Cancer. You are the Cure. From your death, a new universe starts.

A new beginning.