I own nothing but the ideas I place before you. I own no rights to anything of the original story of DeathNote.
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Why Not Me?
I laid in bed and looked at the empty pillow next to my head. I saw the white pillow and I psychically felt pain in my chest because I wasn't seeing his hair and the back of his head there. I reached out to touch the memory and instantly felt foolish when I didn't feel anything and saw the empty space next to me again.
I turned away to keep from feeling alone, but I felt the coldness at my back even more. I turned over and laid on my back with a thump on the soft mattress that didn't squeak. I turned my head and looked at the pillow again. I saw his face now. He normally turned in the night a number of times and which side of him I saw when I opened my eyes was always a guess.
His jaw was covered in short hairs that he would shave when it was his turn to use the bathroom in the morning.
I remember sitting up and watching him the third night we slept together. I crouched on my pillow, my hands were on my knees and I looked at him in wonder as he experienced oblivion of the world around him. Of me next to him.
His hair was out of place as his head moved from side to side. His perfect image of being in control no longer there. The awe of his presence cracked with this of a normal man.
I crossed my toes and rubbed one with the other as I pulled the length of chain that connected us a bit closer.
The memory went black and I questioned the darkness until I opened my eyes and I saw the cream colored ceiling hanging over head in the shadows. My mind thought of where he would be now. With her. I don't hate her and I don't hate him.
I just wish that it was me.
I turned back to what was his side. I pulled the pillow closer and wrapped my body around it. I smelt a faint smell that I once thought was his.
It will fade. The memory and the pain always fades.
I closed my eyes for my last attempt at finding sleep and this time I found it.
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Yes, this story is connected to the other DeathNote that I wrote. DeathNote was not a happy story for these two characters, and don't feel that inclined to change it. That is one of the reasons why it's so powerful. So I'm keeping all that and trying to work my own ideas around that.
Now if someone else hooks up and has a happy couple life... that wouldn't be so bad would it?
