Considering how the Outrealms seems to connect to every known dimension/universe, I figured it was only a matter of time before one of the Annas began "liberating" sacred items from different worlds and selling them at ridiculous prices. After remembering Tanaka's home shopping channel from the Persona series, I decided Anna should have an equally entertaining show where she would put these items on sale.
Currently, I'm debating if I should add in extra chapters showing what some of these buyers do with their newly purchased items or not. Of course, this would mean the updates will come a bit slower but I'll leave that for all of you readers to decide. For now, let's see what sort of crazy item Anna managed to get her hands on today. Without further ado, I present the pilot episode of:
Anna's Home Shopping Channel
Ep 1: A Master Sale
Hello and welcome to Anna's Home Shopping Channel, the one and only place for your strange and mythical merchandise! Today, we have a very special item straight from the legendary lands of Hyrule itself! That's right, the merchandise on sale today is none other than the one and only Master Sword! We're not kidding here folks, what you see here is the actual Master Sword wielded by the various heroes of Hyrule! Forged from the fires of Mount Doom it… Wait a second. This isn't the right script! Hubba! Did you forget to organize these again? Umm… give me a second.
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Aha! There you are! Okay, let's get back on track. Ahem. Forged by the goddess Hylia to protect the world from evil, the Master Sword is the ultimate weapon against the forces of darkness! Its magical blade is good for slaying all sorts of monsters without ever having to sharpen it! In fact, we're so confident, that we're willing to give a full money-back guarantee if the blade ever dulls!
But wait! That's not all! If cutting down monsters and other baddies isn't your cup of tea then you'll probably be interested in the sword's equally potent power of being able to easily cut down any and all forms of grass! If you're tired of managing your front yard with a boring old lawn mower, then this is the item for you! Just pick up the Master Sword and begin laying waste to the evils of your overgrown lawn! Add in a few grunts and shouts and you'll be on your way of being just like the legendary heroes of Hyrule!
If you order now, this awesome monster and grass slaying sword can be yours for the low, low price of 1,0000,000 rupees (or your local equivalent)! As a bonus, if you order in the next five minutes, I'll even add this evil looking mask for free! I think the natives called it the Majora's Mask or something but all I know is that it'll make you the center of attention at every costume party you go to! (Disclaimer: We are not responsible for any cases of moon-related destruction ensuing from this mask.)
This deal is so hot that we're only offering this once! Call now before you miss your chance to obtain this truly epic, one-of-a-kind legendary sword!
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Oh, it seems like we already have a buyer! Well, that's that folks! We're sold out for today's sale but make sure to stay tuned for the next amazing deal! I'm Anna from the Outrealms and this has been another exciting sale from Anna's Home Shopping Channel! I hope to see you again!
One guess as to who bought the Master Sword. And no, it wasn't Link. XD
