Of Evil Plot Bunnies and Hot Characters: Redux
A Percy Jackson story
Original written by: Lex/xXxDaughteroftheKingxXx and Max/musiclover99
Edited by: Max/musiclover99
©-Rick Riordan and other people for other various things

Gods, it's been a while. (Lex . . .) So basically, I was feeling nostalgic and read OEPBHC, the original—and I realized something. It sucks. It's like, 50% okay, but the "romance" is awful, there's a few grammatical errors that now peeve me off, etc. So I'm grabbing the bull by the horns and just redoing a few things. Hope you don't mind. ;) [At least now I'm 'updating' instead of just not doing anything on FF anymore.]
For anyone who doesn't remember or doesn't know, here's the name list (some account names may have changed or the person on the may have just fizzled out of fanfiction or something - if anyone knows any changes or updates, please inform me/us in a review!):
xXxDaughteroftheKingxXx(Lex)

musiclover99(Max)
daughterofhades5565(Terra)
bubble drizzles(Gigi)
Luke'sgirl.D..LL(Tallie)
Chosen Hero(Rjay)
Akheilos and Delphin Inc.(Angela/Gel)

Enjoy the redux!


"Bored," Max dragged out, plopping her feet on top of the coffee table in front of the couch. "So bored, so very, very bored, this level of boredom should not be humanly possible to achieve, like, God—"

"We get it," Tallie interrupted. "You're bored. So are we. Any ideas?"

"I've got nothing," Rjay said.

"Nothing new," Terra commented. Before Rjay could object, however, Gigi stated, "Same here. There's nothing to do!"

"Stupid evil plot bunny," Gel grumbled. Terra raised an eyebrow at the girl.

"Evil 'plot bunny'?" she questioned.

"The one that gave us all our ideas for our stories? Like—"

"We know, Lex," Max said, holding a hand up to stop the girl. "We don't really care."

"Well, Terra asked, and—"

"Look at all the fu—"

"Enough you two," Tallie intervened. "We're bored, we don't really wanna start a fight."

"That'd be more exciting than this, you know," Rjay said.

"I got it!" Gel exclaimed happily.

"An idea?" Max asked hopefully.

"No, I found my pen!" Everyone promptly groaned at the statement, besides Gel and Lex.

"No, I got it," Lex said, rolling her eyes. Everyone turned towards her, who then grinned at her friends with her new idea.

"What if—and I repeat, what if—we write a story about us meeting characters from Percy Jackson?"

The room fell in silence, the others pondering the idea as Lex grinned triumphantly. Eventually, Tallie spoke up, asking, "With characters from the actual books or the characters from our stories too?"

"And what about The Heroes of Olympus characters, like Leo?" Gigi asked. "I mean, he seems pretty hot."

"He can conjure fire," Max said, grinning. Gigi rolled her eyes and said, "That's not what I meant."

"I know," was the only reply she got.

Lex shrugged at the questions. "Depends—whatever you guys want."

"The idea's interesting," Gel concluded.

"Agreed," Tallie said. "All in favor?" Everyone proceeded to raise their hands in a unanimous voting.

"Good," Lex finalized, smiling. "Now, let's start with a qu—" She was cut off by bright flashes of light. All the authors shielded their eyes.

When the lights faded away, nine unfamiliar, yet completely familiar people were standing in its places.

"Oh—"

"My—"

"God," the seven authors said in unison.

"Y-you're—" Gigi started in shock.

"Um, hi?" a teenage boy with jet black hair and sea green said warily.

". . . tell me this isn't a dream," Max said. "Please."

The girl with electric blue eyes and choppy black hair blinked, and said, "Percy? Annabeth? Grover? What're you guys doing here? Where are the other Hunters? And Lady Artemis?"

"The better question would be: What are we doing here?" a blonde girl with stormy gray eyes corrected.

Max proceeded to sit down onto the couch in shock, while the others were thinking about doing the same.

"It's—it's them," Rjay whispered in wonder. "Percy—"

"Annabeth—"

"Grover—"

"Thalia—"

"Nico—"

"The Stolls—"

"Chris—"

"—and Clarisse," Rjay and the others said in hushed tones. Said girl raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, cough up some answers, punks. Where the Hades are we? Who the heck are you guys? And how the heck do you know our names?" Clarisse demanded, narrowing her eyes.

"She's a bit calmer than Rick said she was," Gel muttered. "I think."

"Rick?" Nico overheard, narrowing his obsidian black eyes. Gel edged away a bit.

"Should we tell them?" Tallie questioned, whispering as to not let the campers know. Lex nodded reluctantly, saying that it's, "probably the best idea."

Max rubbed her head while getting up and explained, "You guys are in the real world. At least, to us, the real world. The world without Greek gods on top of the empire state building."

"Sadly," Terra commented. Max went on, finishing with, "You guys are . . . fictional here. Along with your world."

"What?" one of the Stolls—Travis, judging from his height compared to the other—sputtered. "That's impossible. We're right here!"

"And we can see that," Gigi amended. "But it's true. You're 'fictional' in this world. We know practically everything about you, some more so than others." Her eyes went to Max, who in turn rolled her eyes, and continued, "Yeah, like Percy's first quest, what schools he went to, even his 'Achilles heel.'"

Percy's eyes widened. "Wait—you know what?"

"And how?" Annabeth demanded.

"We just told you," Terra argued. "You're fictional—books."

After a pregnant pause, Tallie continued, "Very popular books, at that. There's way more people that know this stuff than us—hundreds of thousands at least."

The campers' eyes widened slightly.

"But they don't know you're real," Gel reminded. "So don't worry—you probably don't even belong in this world."

"Too bad," Terra muttered. "Some campers are hot."

Everyone, thankfully, chose to ignore that comment.

"Well," Lex started. "Since we currently don't know how to get you guys back, we'll just have to hang out and figure it out, eventually."

"We can watch your movie, or read The Son of Neptune, or—" Gigi started, before being interrupted by Max's hiss of, "Shut up!"

"That stuff hasn't happened yet!" Gel picked up. "Too much information of the future for them."

"Son of Neptune?" Annabeth inquired. "Neptune means Poseidon. So if it's a Son of Neptune, isn't that Percy?"

"No!" Lex insisted. "That's another book series! Totally irrelevant! Don't worry!" Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Max shooting her a look that screamed, You are an idiot. She glared at the twelve year old in return.

"Forget about it, okay?" Tallie pleaded when she saw that Annabeth didn't believe Lex.

"Nobody's even got a copy," Rjay said. Then he added, "Right?"

Everyone nodded, while Gigi mentioned, "Well, since this is our 'house', we all have it in our rooms or something—"

"Shut up, Gigi," Rjay groaned.

"Right. Yeah. No one's even got the book here . . ."

"This isn't such a bad thing, though," Terra said. "I mean, there's hot boys in the room!"

"Oh, God," Max muttered, plopping down on the couch again. "Please don't get started."

"You think they're cute," the goth girl argued. "What difference does it make?"

"Oh, please," the girl scoffed. "There's a difference from liking characters, and being in love with them, Terra."

"It is true though," Gigi backed up, then sighed dreamily. "Like Zach Goode."

"Oh, yes!" Lex agreed. "Fang's hot. Even if he sucked in those last few book, he's hot."

"Nico's hot, too, for a like, twelve year old," Terra added. The campers were now practically invisible to most of the authors, except for Max and Rjay.

"I don't know whether to be flattered or scared," Nico muttered.

"I'm with you there, cousin," Percy said. Thalia wrinkled her nose at some of the snippets from the girls' conversation. After a moment of thought, Max said firmly, "'Creeped out' would be a better reaction."

"Why did I join, again?" Rjay asked, edging closer to the campers.

"Dude! It's six single girls! Alone! With you!" Connor said, like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"Five. I mean, she's like, twelve or something, so . . . " Travis trailed off, pointing a thumb towards Max, who looked a little green at the idea.

"Good lord, don't even joke about that, dude," she insisted, shaking her head.

"Max! Explain to Tallie that the Stolls are cute!" Lex called over, walking towards the girl.

"Um, hello, they're right here," Max said, pointing towards the two. "Less than a few feet away from me. Can this be any more awkward?"

"Well, it's to be expected," Connor said, starting to puff out his chest a little. "We are totally handsome." Travis nodded, a serious expression on his face before his classic crooked grin came out.

"Oh, totally," Max said drily, rolling her eyes.

"I like their characters and all," Tallie explained, "but they're never really mentioned too much. So yeah . . ."

"They're right here, Tallie," Gigi persisted. "You can not say they're not cute now."

"We are not 'cute,'" Travis insisted. "We are ruggishly handsome, and totally hot."

"Keep thinking that, boys," Max said.

"We are not boys," Connor protested. "We are totally tough, manly men." The two brothers tried to emphasized the fact by flexing their virtually nonexistent muscles.

"Whatever gets you through the morning," Max replied, an amused smile on her face.

"But I guess I like Travis better than Connor," Tallie said after a moment of contemplation.

"Who doesn't?" Gel agreed, grinning. Connor visibly deflated after that, the grin replaced with a slight grimace.

"Gee," he muttered. "I just feel so loved."

"I told you I'm better," Travis said triumphantly, smirking at his little brother.

"But seriously," Chris intervened after calming down Clarisse, who was seething about how this is all pointless and that they have to find a way to go back to Camp. "What're we going to do now?"

After another moment of silence, Gigi piped up, saying, "Leo's hot, probably."

"Oh, yes," Tallie nodded. "So is Iggy. Never forget Iggy."

"Sage[*] wouldn't let us," Max commented, while rolling her eyes again.

"But Percy tops them," Lex said. "But maybe Zach Goode can beat even him. Maybe."

Percy face felt warm, and he had to restrain his girlfriend from doing something that'd be later regretted.


"Got any 3's?" Gel asked to Percy, Nico, Thalia, Gigi, and Max, the people playing Go Fish. After the initial chaos had settled, everyone dispersed to do various things.

"Go Fish," Percy replied. All was rather calm compared to earlier, but then, Annabeth said from where she sat in front of the computer, "Oh my gods."

"What?" Tallie said curiously. She walked over to see Annabeth on Fanfiction, on one story where the characters read The Lost Hero.

Tallie cussed, which brought the attention of the other six authors.

"Ugh," Max groaned, getting up slowly and throwing her cards into the pile. "What is it now? I was winning . . ."

"What is it?" Gel asked. The others' eyes widened, and Max summed up their thoughts in one statement.

"Oh, crap!"

"Who let her on the computer?" Lex asked.

"Not me," Rjay said, backing out.

"And obviously not me," Tallie said.

Everyone continued to deny that they had, until Terra was left, looking sheepishly at the ground.

"Dude!" Max exclaimed. "Are you insane?"

"Well, was I supposed to know she'd go on Fanfiction?" she protested.

"Um, hello, we're Fanfiction authors!" Gigi said. "Pretty sure that it's in your history."

"She hasn't read our stories yet, right?" Lex asked, then muttered, "Cause I kinda killed Percy in one."

"She's still a demigod," Max said. "She's got dyslexia. She probably only read the one right now."

". . . then why aren't we stopping her from finishing chapter two?" Rjay asked. The others' eyes widened in realization.

"That . . . is a good question," Max muttered.

"Too bad we don't have the answer," Tallie deadpanned. "C'mon, let's stop her."

Terra went to where the plugs were and unplugged her computer, causing it to beep and the screen to go black to setups. Annabeth turned around and looked up.

"Okay?" she said. "What was that about?"

"Get off," Lex said. "Now. Seriously."

"Make me."

"I will."

"I'd like to see you try, mortal."

"In case you've forgotten, Chase," Lex started, a smirk showing up, "I created the Revolution. Us seven are the main founders."

"Yes, yes, blah blah, etc., etc., and because of Rjay, Miss I-Started-The-Revolution here has a huge head," Terra interrupted.

"We might as well let her read it," Rjay said reluctantly. "I mean, if we started this thing, we can probably come up with another thing, like a mind-wiping machine."

"Yes! Like the one from Artemis Fowl! It's so cool. We'd better do a fine-tune wipe, though, if we try," Max said, trailing off near the end. Lex blinked, then rubbed her temples, sighing.

"Why on earth did I get these two to join?" she moaned. "As if their obsession with Pokémon was bad enough, now they're gonna become PJO-fanatic, Pokémon-nerd mad scientists."

"At least we're not addicted to Nico di Angelo, like some people," Gel said, looking pointedly at Terra, who grinned.

"I would be very, very scared if Rjay was addicted to Nico di Angelo," Tallie muttered.

"That image just made me want to laugh and puke at the same time," Max commented, shuddering. Everyone else agreed, except for Rjay. "Although we did call him a fag before."

"On the forum!" Lex said, recounting the memory. "Then Fanfiction edited it out, so we had to call him a gaf instead."

"I am young and straight, thank you!" Rjay protested.

"You're welcome," the two girls said.

"Okay, we're getting off topic," Gigi stated.

"I dunno, this is kinda fun," Terra said.

"As entertaining as this is, I think Gigi has a point," Tallie said.

"We should probably stop Annabeth from reading the rest of The Lost Hero, right?" Gel said. "Dyslexic or not, she's still gonna read it, eventually."

"Oh god," Lex said. "She knows Jason."

"No kidding!" Terra said. "He's the POV of the first chapter, of course she knows Jason now!"

"Jason," Thalia said suddenly. "Jason who?"

"Oh, crap," Rjay muttered. "Cheese." The hunter looked confused.

"Cheesecake," Gigi added.

"Strawberry cheesecake," Gel joined in.

"Junior's strawberry cheesecake," Lex put in.

"Junior's strawberry cheesecake tastes," Terra added. Thalia was now rolling her eyes at the odd authors and their attempt to distract her.

"Junior's strawberry cheesecake tastes very," Tallie said.

"Junior's strawberry cheesecake tastes very gross," Max concluded.

"Blasphemy!" Rjay gasped.

"You realize that blasphemy is the insulting of God, religion, and sacred things, right?" Lex pointed out.

"Cheesecake's sacred!"

"Sure it is," Gigi said. "Keep telling yourself that . . . Geezer."

"Not you too!"

"It's not just us, you know," Lex said, rolling her eyes.

"But you know I'm not an old man! I'm right here!"

"Or, you were sent by your grandpa who's the real Rjay, and you're just a decoy to trick us," Max said.

Annabeth sighed as the authors bickered behind her. Percy's missing? And there's this Jason guy with two others—the girl, Piper and the boy, Leo—with a satyr, but they're so old to be just found. What's going on?

Despite these thoughts, Annabeth smirked. They never did take away Terra's laptop.


[*] Sage makes a cameo! She's in The Mansion, and is totally obsessed with Nico and Iggy for some reason. I couldn't resist.

So yes, I did squeeze together chapters one, two, and three into one kinda-large chapter, but only because those chapters are so irrelevant to the actual story. I figure, one chapter's enough. I have a feeling that this will be much better than the first version (but some parts still can't satisfy me). It had a few grammar errors that I didn't know were grammar errors until a few months ago. It was rather awkwardly written. The dialogue didn't flow smoothly. The "romance" in coming chapters are off. So . . . I wanted to redo it. [Now I'm just repeating myself.] And therefore, this redux was born. Hope you enjoyed, and remember to watch for the rest of the redux!