It was the rapping at her door that woke Andy McNally from her stupor that morning. She had been sitting there with the same cup of coffee clutched in her hands, feet perched on the coffee table, head tipped back to stare into the sponge-work of the plastered ceiling, pondering her existence. She had now been on suspension for ten days, which meant, only ten more days to go. She pitched forward and drank took in a gulp of coffee, now slightly cold. She ambled slowly to the door of her new home, nudged a box away from the door with her toe. She had finalized the papers a day after the terms of her suspension were settled, and the boys had helped her move in a few days ago. Now, the pristine condo she had purchased looked like an overgrown jungle of boxes.

Andy couldn't imagine who would be visiting her at this hour. She knew by 8:30 all of her friends were on shift, and had probably just left parade. She opened the door and was surprised to find Oliver Shaw standing there looking impatient. He glanced at his watch and said, "McNally, let's go. We need to have a talk."

"Huh?" She was slightly stunned by the order, but set her cup down on the coffee table and slipped on the pair of flats that were lying on the floor where she had haphazardly thrown them off last night. Shrugging into a jacket, she followed him out of her building and up to the police cruiser.

At her brief hesitation, he directed, "Just get in the car. We're gonna get breakfast."

"Ok, sir."


They were quickly seated at one of the diners they frequented on shift. Oliver had picked up a piece of toast and was buttering it. "McNally…" he started, then turned more personal, "Andy. I don't know the specifics of what happened during that undercover-and I don't want to know." But she could tell he did want to know. It was endearing how much of a gossip he was. "I don't know whose fault any of that was, but I do know that you put your career on the line for my best friend, no, my brother's safety." He took a bite of the toast and swallowed. "Sam is a brother to me. So when I say this, don't get mad, it is just me looking out for my family, I would do the same for you, too." He paused for a moment and looked at her, waiting for acknowledgment. At her nod, he continued, abruptly asking, "Do you love him? I mean walk-down-the-aisle-in-a-big-white-dress, have-sixteen-babies, old-people-hand-holding love?"

She paused for a moment. Did he really just ask her that? "I really think I do, Oliver. "

"Have you told him?" was the quick response.

"Haven't really had the opportunity, recently," she stated simply, mildly bitter about the situation.

He gulped back some scrambled eggs before saying, "Good. While I am in the mood for asking personal questions, can I ask what you were doing wasting your time with Callahan?" Zoe would slap him across the face if she knew he was asking all of these personal questions.

"To be honest I really can't even justify it in my own head. I think it all stems back to my dad. You know about his…problems," She paused and waited for a sign of recognition. At his nod she continued, "I felt that if I got into a relationship that I was truly, truly invested in, I could only get hurt. The same way my dad hurt me and the same way my mom hurt the both of us.

"I looked at Sam and knew if I let it develop, I would be totally invested in that relationship, and I was afraid of that. He had made it very apparent from the start that he was interested in going to Guns n' Gangs as soon as a position was available. So I went against my instinct that told me we should be together and I went for the opposite type of man. Hence, Luke." She paused. Taking a bite of food, then swallowing she continued, "He was safe, he wasn't my training officer, and he seemed stable- something I had never had in my life. And when I left him, it hurt, but not as much as it should have."

Hesitating a little, Andy went on, "It was a real relationship, I loved him, but I don't think I was ever truly invested in it. You know? It scares me to think that I would have married him. I really had fooled myself into thinking I would have been happy with a man who was married to the job, and couldn't get over the one that got away. He would have one day resented me and left me, just like my mother."

A heavy silence fell on the table, as the two finished their meals. The waitress ambled over and took Oliver's payment for the food, and they stood up to put their coats back on.

He drove her back to her condo and before she could open the door, he said, "Andy, my break is up. I have to go do some actual policing today… but, let's have lunch tomorrow. I'd like to continue this talk." She nodded and smiled at him slightly. Walking inside the entrance to the building she smiled a little to herself. That had been cathartic. Somehow, she felt she could talk to Oliver. He was like this guardian angel for her. And he was like family.


Ok. New story. Multi-chapter. Don't have a feeling for how long it will go, but it will span the suspension, at least. I really love the oliver/andy/sam/everybody dynamic. He is one of my favorites. Review please- makes me go faster, I promise! :)