Sanya leaned against the tree, gripping one of her elbows with her other hand. The sun was setting, displaying a spectacular view to all who cared to look. But Sanya's gaze was directed to the ground a few feet from her. She was having another mood swing; a feeling of worthlessness. She thought they'd have gone for good after so many years, but as of late they were becoming more frequent. And she didn't know how to stop them.
What is wrong with me? Why do I always feel depressed and worthless? I should be happy! I have friends that are very dear to me and friends that I can trust with nearly anything, I have an occupation that I enjoy and leaves enough free-time for reading and writing. So why am I so unhappy?
I feel so worthless; like I am nothing in the eyes of others. My friends attend the feasts and spent hours dancing with many a male Elf. I have not attended one in years; no one would ask me and I would just feel left out and ashamed that I cannot draw the least bit of attention.
My friends are all asking me if I am well – they must have noticed my mounting depression – but they have enough to worry about, what with all the Elves they have on their tails. Legolas has even asked me a few times of my well-being – probably one of his duties as Prince – but I tell him I am fine. He has more important things to pay attention to.
But how do I become happy again? I have been dreaming that a certain Elven-Prince would lend me some aid, but that will never happen. I'm not good enough for someone as well-respected and caring as him, or anyone else, for that matter. I'll never be good enough for anyone.
"Sanya?" a voice pulled Sanya from her thoughts. It was the Prince.
"Yes, my Lord?" she answered.
"I saw you standing there alone and I was wondering if you wanted some company."
'You can stay if you like," Sanya said. "But I am not in the greatest of moods."
Legolas leaned against the tree, facing Sanya. "What troubles you, Sanya?"
"You do not need to trouble yourself with my problems, my Lord," Sanya said, looking fixedly at her feet. "They are not important."
"Ah, so you admit that there isa problem," Legolas said. "And it seems very important to me if you are not in a good mood.
"Why would it be important to you? I barely know you."
"Sanya, I have known you long enough to know that you have changed."
Sanya looked up. "Changed?"
"You are more depressed than content, I have not seen you laugh for a long time, nor have I seen you at banquets for many years."
Sanya was silent for a long time, unsure of what to say. At length she spoke, keeping her gaze on the ground and playing with the sleeve of her dress with one hand.
"I feel as though I am worthless; as though I will never be good enough."
"How can you say such a thing about yourself?"
Sanya did not answer, but Legolas lifted her chin, silently asking her to look at him.
"Tell me, please. I swear I will not laugh at you or hurt you in any way. I want to help you."
"Truly?"
"Yes," he replied, taking his finger away from her chin.
Then Sanya told him everything, not once glancing at his face. Though he had given her his word, she was afraid of his reaction. She left out her dreams about him too. How stupid would that sound if she told him? It was far better off if he never found out.
When she was finished, she waited anxiously for his response. She was certain that he could hear her heart hammering in her chest. But what Legolas did next was not something she had expected: he took both her hands in his and bade her to look at him.
"You feel alone, do you not?"
Sanya nodded and Legolas continued.
"I find it hard to believe that you have failed to attract an ellon's attention. You are kind and caring, not to mention easy on the eyes, as well as intelligent. Some of my colleagues had have taken a liking to you, but they are the types who make their moves at banquets and dances. They were quite disappointed when you failed to attend the New Year festival; they had been hoping to spend time with you then, as you always seem to have something to do or somewhere to go. You are more popular than you give yourself credit for." He winked at her and she smiled. "Ah, there is a smile! It is easier to be happy as opposed to depressed, is it not?"
"Legolas…" Sanya said softly, throwing her arms around him and hugging him. It was the only way she knew how to thank him for understanding her. "Thank you," she whispered, just in case he mistook her embrace for something else and she ended up feeling like a fool.
He took it for something else anyways. When she tried to step away, he kept his arms around her. When she looked at him in confusion, he smiled at her mysteriously. "There is one thing I do not understand, however."
"Yes?" Sanya asked, her brows furrowing in a frown.
"How can one feel as though she is not good enough for anyone if she has managed to attract the Prince?"
"Surely you jest!" Sanya exclaimed.
"Do I?" Before she could answer to that he slid a hand behind her head and lowered his face, his mouth covering hers.
Seems like it is too late for those ellyn now.
