Oliver Finds His Higher Ground
Oliver poured the YooHoo into the blender and Shane burst out laughing. She opened the first letter and began:
"Dear Oliver:
We took off just a few minutes ago, and as I sit here writing to you I realize that you have made a believer out of me. It wasn't a mistake that I was transferred to the Dead Letter Office, but my own Divine Delivery, as it was truly an event that would change my life forever. I'm writing this letter with your pen, and my mind returns to our date, a doodled napkin that you placed in your jacket pocket, and the staircase. I remember the look in your eyes as I stopped, pulled your hand and drew you down towards me. I was holding my breath in anticipation and had to put my hand on the railing to steady myself as we finally shared our first kiss. I'd waited so long for that kiss, but the waiting made the reality of that moment so sweetly beautiful that I struggled to keep back the tears."
Shane folded the sheet of paper, put it back into the envelope, and laid it aside. Oliver looked up from the ginger he was chopping.
"Why did you stop?" he asked.
"Steve walked up and handed me a cup of coffee. I hoped he would go sit somewhere else. We had the entire airplane to ourselves except for the flight crew and a couple of well-armed Marines, but he sat down beside me and began outlining the mission parameters."
She reached for the next envelope and opened it.
"I don't want the smoothie right now. Come sit with me."
Oliver raised his eyebrow and tilted his head slightly to the side.
She patted the spot next to her. "Come on."
Oliver obliged, walking over to the file cabinet and pulling himself up beside her as she began the next letter.
"Dear Oliver:
We landed about an hour ago. A sliver of sun just edged over the horizon. I have no idea where I am. I asked Steve, but he said it was safer for me if I didn't know. We're in the desert. It's hot, and dusty, and barren. It is a military facility. My 'quarters' have one window, a bed, a desk, and a small bathroom. The paint is as dull and drab as the scenery outside. I'm sitting on my bed while I write, and I'm suddenly overwhelmed with loneliness. I miss you, and I wish I'd never left. Why didn't I tell Steve no? There are so many people here. He couldn't have needed me that badly. I recognized many colleagues from my time in DC, but no one can acknowledge that fact. Security is tight. Army and Marines patrol every corridor. No one goes anywhere without an escort. I'm so tired. I barely slept on the plane. I wish I could have and then I wouldn't have had to deal with the reality that I was flying farther and farther from Denver and everything & everyone that's important to me. I can't sleep now. I'm due at the first meeting in five minutes.
Always, Shane"
Shane put the letter back into its envelope and laid it on top of the first one. Oliver placed his arm around her and laid her head against his shoulder. She raised her eyes to look at him, and he noticed for the first time the heavy, dark circles under her eyes that the carefully applied makeup didn't completely conceal.
"You can't be comfortable sitting here." Oliver slid off the cabinet, then placed his hands around Shane's waist and lifted her down. Shane gathered the letters and they moved towards the well worn sofa. Oliver paused long enough to remove his jacket and loosen his tie. He sat down and laid his arm across the back of the sofa. Shane took off her shoes and sat down next to him. Oliver put his arm around her, pulled her close, and returned her head to his shoulder. She opened the next letter.
"Dear Oliver,
The first day is finally over. I'm exhausted and completely overwhelmed. I remember how shocked you were the first time I used my hacking skills to check out Michael Wheeler's activities. Breaking into a city hall mainframe is easy. What I'm facing here is closer to what I dealt with during our first Christmas together, trying to get past the firewall of the Denver Mercy Hospital to see if Hannah's mother had been admitted there. You believe I'm the best at what I do, but it may not be enough. I'm a good hacker, but this time I'm not sure. I'm afraid. I'm really afraid that I can't do what they need me to do. I have a mountain of reading to do before tomorrow, so I'd better get started. If only I could get this knot of fear out of my stomach.
Always, Shane"
Shane opened the next letter and continued reading.
"Dear Oliver:
I can't believe we've been here a month. We're finally making some progress, but there are many times when all I can do is let the programs run, sometimes for hours. I've started looking for Hattie again. You promised me that you would find Gabe, and I know that you and Norman and Rita are using our "wide powers of postal discretion" in pursuit of that goal. Even though we're separated, my heart is with all of you, and working on finding Hattie keeps me connected to you. Steve almost caught me the other day. I programmed a new search for Hattie and was just about to start it when he came up behind me. Fortunately, I was able to press delete before he saw anything. It's late. I really need to get some sleep.
Always, Shane"
"Going back to our old way of doing things presented quite a challenge," Oliver told her. "We'd had nothing but dead ends at the time you wrote that letter. Actually, the first solid lead to locating Gabe came from Ramon. He added live music to the Mailbox Grille. Saturday nights were to be Blues Nights. Ramon assured us that since musicians attract other musicians, if Gabe was in Denver, he would come and play there."
"Did he come that first night?"
"No, but we talked to the blues players that performed. One gave us another potential lead."
Oliver picked up the next letter and handed it to Shane. "I'll tell you more about Gabe later. Keep reading."
Shane opened the letter.
"Dear Oliver:
Another month has passed. The compound was attacked today. This wasn't the first time. In the beginning, the bombs were far away, but with each new attack, they keep getting closer. Steve and I were in the middle of analyzing the latest data when one exploded again, right outside the window. Steve put his arm around me, but it didn't help. Each time we're attacked, the knot of fear in my stomach grows tighter and tighter. I'm so scared that I'm going to die before I can see you again. I need to see you, to talk to you, to feel your arms around me. In spite of everything, I'm getting closer to finding Hattie. I have a solid lead; I just need some uninterrupted time to pursue it.
Always, Shane"
Shane picked up the next letter and opened it. The ink was blue, and faded in several spots as if she'd been crying. Oliver shifted uncomfortably on the sofa. Shane had written this letter after he walked away from her in DC.
"Dear Oliver:
Why did I let you go? Why didn't I just leave with you? Why did I trust Steve? You were right. We've been back in the States a little over three weeks, exactly when you told me the crisis ended. After you left, I confronted Steve and he admitted the truth. He just wanted to keep me here. He also told me he was still in love with me, but said nothing about wanting a relationship with me, or about the kind of relationship he hoped for. I never knew where I stood with him in the past, and that still hasn't changed. I want to come home, but I can't leave until Steve signs the necessary papers. I'm stuck here. I must keep up the facade, looking for breaches that don't even exist. I could refuse to work, but that won't accomplish anything. There's no point in filing a complaint against Steve, no one would believe me. Trying to find Hattie always helped keep me going, but I don't even have that any more. All I can do is survive, one day at a time, and wait.
Always, Shane"
The pain in Shane's eyes was more than Oliver could bear. He had caused her much of that pain, but he didn't know what to do or what to say. He decided it was time for him to read a letter. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a small envelope.
"What's that?" Shane asked.
"My turn." He opened the envelope and withdrew a single sheet of paper.
"My dear Shane:
I'm writing this while sitting on the plane. I'm heading for Austin to find Hattie. I'm so proud of you. You found her. You are the best at what you do. Always. Why did I let you go and walk away? Why didn't I take you with me? Yet, if I had done that, I would have deprived you of your right to choose. I don't want you to come home because I made you, but because you want to. At least now I have your address and can write to you. You are in my thoughts and prayers. If you decide to come home, know that I am here waiting for you. Until then, I remain, faithfully,
Oliver"
Shane raised her eyes and looked at Oliver. Her cheeks were wet. Oliver lifted his jacket to retrieve the pocket square, and then remembered he'd given it to Norman. He took Shane's face in his hands and gently wiped her cheeks with his thumbs. She wrapped her arms around him and put her head back on his shoulder. Oliver laid his head on top of hers. They sat in contented silence for several minutes.
The first rays of the morning sun were shining through the windows. Oliver slipped on his jacket and gathered the letters while Shane put on her shoes.
"Would you like that smoothie now?" Oliver asked Shane.
"I have to finish reading the first letter."
She took the letters from him and pulled it from the bottom of the pile.
Oliver frowned. "You weren't able to finish it. Steve came up and interrupted you."
"I added something later." She stood up and stretched.
Oliver walked to the refrigerator and took another YooHoo. He dumped the warm one out and poured the cold one into the blender. Shane sat on top of the file cabinet again.
"Continued the day after you left DC.
I was eating breakfast the next morning when a stiff, sober Marine walked up and handed me an envelope. It contained my release papers and a plane ticket. I'm on the plane now, coming home, and I'm never leaving again. Back to the Rockies, to Denver, to you, to the life God meant me to live. I can barely sit still. I finally asked the flight attendant for headphones so I could listen to music, hoping that would calm me down. Coincidently, the first song I heard was And So It Goes, but it wasn't a coincidence, since coincidence is the middle name of the Almighty. I closed my eyes and returned to that evening so long ago, to a dance, a dip, a slow spin and my hand laid over your heart. I gave you my heart that night, even though you weren't yet ready to receive it. Our journey towards each other has always been a series of steps, some forward, some back, but without taking those steps, we would never have known the ones we'd need to find our way back to each other.
Always and Forever,
Shane"
Oliver just stood there until Shane finished her letter. She folded it and placed it back in the envelope. He walked over to her and lifted her down. He took her into his arms and kissed her, a kiss that was long and sweet and filled with promise.
Oliver raised his head and smiled. "Now I'll make you the perfect Kombucha smoothie."
"I'd rather have a cup of coffee."
"You don't want the smoothie?"
"No. Not anymore."
Shane picked up the letters and put them into her purse.
"I have a better place to keep those," Oliver told her. He opened the bottom drawer of his desk, pulled out a small box, and handed it to Shane.
"Open it."
Shane lifted the lid and gasped in surprise. "A puzzle box."
"I bought that a long time ago. I've just been waiting for the right thing(s) to put inside it."
Shane handed him the box. "Our own 'treasure box' ".
Oliver pushed and pulled the panels to retrieve the key. He put it in the lock and opened the lid. Shane removed the letters from her purse and placed them inside the box. Oliver pulled the napkin from his jacket pocket, then reached inside the jacket, removed his pen, and laid them on top of the letters.
"Wherever you keep your treasures, that's where your heart will be, too."
He placed their Treasure Box back in his desk. "If you're not too tired, would you take a walk with me before I drive you home? There's something I'd like to show you."
"Coffee first?"
"Of course."
They left the post office and headed for the Denver Bean Coffee House.
"One Aspen Skinny Vanilla Latte and one Steamboat Americano," Oliver told the barista.
By the time they reached the capitol building, they'd finished their coffee.
"You're showing me the capitol building?" Shane asked Oliver. "I have seen it before."
"Not everything."
Oliver dropped the cups into the garbage can, then took Shane's hand and led her up the steps. Halfway up, he stopped.
"We're not going all the way to the top?"
"What does the step say?"
Shane looked down. "Exactly one mile high," she read.
"What was Gabe's return address?"
Shane thought a minute and her eyes widened. "Gabe. A mile high. This is where you found him?"
"Yes. Every Sunday morning, for 12 years, he stood on this step - a mile high - playing his guitar, singing, counting his blessings, and waiting for Hattie. He never lost hope, and yesterday morning, Gabe and Hattie stood on this very spot with their arms around each other."
Oliver lifted Shane's hand and kissed it, then laid it over his heart. He placed his other arm around her and drew her close. He stood exactly one mile high, and for the first time in more than three months, he felt peace, and purpose, and clarity. He could say with absolute certainty "God is in his universe, and all is right with the world." He had found his Higher Ground.
