A/N: Written for a Hetalia-Kink prompt. I thought I'd post it here so that it would motivate me more to finish this~ :Dv Read and enjoy, and yes, I ship USXUK. Hard.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.



Arthur Kirkland had enough.

The Englishman had been patient; he had been dropping hints literally everywhere of every single form possible without looking overly intimidating or like a stalker that he liked Alfred who had a hero complex the size of the galaxy and he still didn't get it.

At all.

Arthur massaged his forehead, a frustrated sigh escaping from his lips. Alfred was such a clueless git. Taking a long sip of the wonderful tea to calm his nerves down, Arthur started thinking back about the time he came admitted to himself out loud (good god, that was embarrassing) that he had feelings for Alfred and more recently, the whole…wooing process. Arthur Kirkland tried hard and very hard he did.

The first move was flowers. Arthur had arranged a bouquet of different flowers (all which carried the meaning of love with them) delivered anonymously every single day to Alfred for a week, and specifically requested that whoever was delivering to 'do it discreetly, or else'.

After a week, Arthur called Alfred-and almost broke the phone he was holding when Alfred mentioned to him that the lovely bouquets of flowers he had received from an unknown admirer had either withered away or thrown outbecause he didn't had the time to care of them, and the water in the vases were turning into potential breeding spots for mosquitoes. Alfred had also nonchalantly shrugged the whole thing off with a 'Nevermind!' and there was no mention of even a little gratitude for the sender.

Arthur Kirkland had never wanted to punch Alfred's lights out this much in the whole of his life.

--

The second move was quite brilliant-in fact, Arthur thought it was the best idea ever out of all things in the history of romance. He had managed to invite Alfred down to one of the local pubs (with good food-Arthur grudgingly admitted that it was hard to find one that would suit Alfred's taste buds) for the night. Arthur shelved his formal wear and dived straight for casual clothing. Everything was going well until a) Arthur got drunk, b) decided to go up and sing 'Take Me Out' by Franz Fredinand , c)stared real intensely into those sky blue pools of Alfred's throughout the whole time while d)dancing, hoping that the bloody thickhead would finally get the message.

It failed completely.

(That night, a slightly disturbed and sniggering Alfred F. Jones bolted out of the pub with a camera in hand with one very high and flustered Arthur Kirkland behind after him. When Alfred showed Francis the video, he had simply sighed and said, "Vous êtes sans espoir, mon cher ." And Alfred didn't know why.)

--

The most recent (and the last) one was-dear lord-it sounded, it went like a great idea in beginning but it became one of those incidents that Arthur himself would prefer not to recall even one bloody shred of it at all.

Arthur had decided to watch a romance movie. With Alfred. It was a little trickier this time-he knew that romance movies weren't Alfred's cup of tea and Arthur had to pick the best. Stick to the classics, Arthur, he told himself. The classics never fail.

He picked Titanic-and everything headed straight for disaster zone once the movie started playing. Alfred stuffed himself with popcorn when the movie begun and the noise generated were bloody annoying and loud. Halfway through the movie, the younger blond started whining about how boring the whole movie was and how there wasn't enough action going on. Arthur had to kick Alfred's leg-hard-several times to get Alfred to his trap up. At the very climax of the movie, the touching scene was unpleasantly interrupted with a big, loud snore from none other than Alfred F. Jones himself.

Arthur Kirkland sunk as low as he could into the seat, his face burning fiercely red in embarrassment and anger as he tried to ignore the glares around him while covering Alfred's mouth, effectively muffling the snores for the rest of the movie.

--

I really, really, really shouldn't have fallen for that idiot in the first place, Arthur thought wryly as he poured himself more tea. Those moves didn't work, and it was more than likely that any similar moves in the future weren't going to work. Arthur had approached it with a slow and subtle strategy-

Wait.

Wait a minute.

If slow and subtle isn't going work with that dense idiot, what about straight and hard?

A smirk slowly formed on his face as a new flame of determination started to burn.

"Screw the classics," Arthur declared out loud as his eyes gleamed with that very same cockiness and confidence he had possessed back in the years when he was a pirate. "Arthur Kirkland is going to go dominate and conquer-and damn well I will." (Arthur also swore secretly by the end of this week, Alfred's vital regions would get invaded so hard that Alfred would be literally begging for more.)


French: You're hopeless/you are without hope, my sir (direct translation)