A/N: "Why (Keep Your Head Down)" translation by KimKenoa twitter. As Nagoya is not where the Minami residence is located and the canon city was not revealed, a substitute town in the prefecture was put in its place. Finally, in the actual final, we had a tie for first place. Coincidentally, the victory speech was originally supposed to have Saki finishing second in mind. Now it has a double meaning. Also, this is actually the 13th Saimoe Administration set up, so Saki and Nodoka are the 13th Saimoe Prime Minister (joint).
All characters represented are property of their respective owners while the 2channel Anime Saimoe Tournament is (C) 2channel. Reviews are moderated, steady on if you don't want to play nice.
Operation Saimoe Sanjo Ikuri
OR,
The Three Girls For One Christmas Assignment
By Jo-Ryan Salazar
In a gesture of goodwill from Nagano's Kiyosumi High School, the members of the Achiga Girls' Academy mahjong club were invited to spend the Christmas at Saki Miyanaga's house. Saki was at the house, along with her partner Nodoka Haramura and her sister Teru, who requested time off from her time at Shiraitodai to be with her sister and renew the relations with her. The healing process was going smoothy, and Saki really felt like she had her big sister back. Anytime she was nagging her to work on her classes, to step up her technique, to improve her knowledge of directions, Saki knew that Teru Miyanaga was being the big sister that she always remembered.
"Onee-chan, can you tie my hair back?" asked Saki to Teru, who was preparing a hotpot full of goodies for the guests. The Matsumi sisters: Kuro and Yuu, were upstairs playing online mahjong, Arata Sagimori was taking up a new habit: online golf, after one week of schooling her peers online in mahjong from Korea, Europe and the Americas, going so far as to call the Brazilians counterparts "unskilled hackers." And in what was usually Saki's bed, Ako Atarashi was petting Shizuno Takakamo in their underwear while Nodoka was across from them, reading a magazine with Etopen under her bust.
"You can't do it yourself?" she asked, unimpressed.
"But you're my big sister, you're supposed to do it while you're here! Come on, big sis!"
"Jeez, Saki, you are who they say you are." Cracking her knuckles, Teru proceeded to tie her younger sister's hair back into twin tails. "Welcome back, my imouto." She had to chuckle.
"Hey big sis, you know I'm taken, right?" she snarked, grinning.
"Oh Saki, you REALLY are who they say you are! Not just in the mahjong arena. That aura is everywhere. I wonder..."
"Ehhhh, I smell something delicious," Shizuno yawned, walking into the room in just her panties. "Uh, good morning?"
"Oy, Shizu!" Saki said, throwing her track jacket at her while blushing. "On! Put it on!"
Shizuno immediately put on her trademark track jacket. On cue, she woke up, taking off her underwear, saluting. "Good morning, Saki-chan, Teru-san!"
"It's night," they both said, pointing to the window.
"Oh! The sun went down! Is there a wolf outside?"
"None," said Teru.
Saki peered. "I only see a drunk man out on the streets doing his...ahhh! Onee-chan!"
"You should not see such disgusting exhibitions, Saki," Teru deadpanned, covering Saki's maiden eyes.
"What did you cook, Teru?" asked Shizu.
"It's a Korean stew. It's called budae jjigae, I think. It's spicy. I don't know if you will like it."
"We were smelling the food here as well," Arata said, heading into the dining room with the others. "Really nice flavor." The living room was full of presents, and the interior was decked for the holidays.
"I hope this can warm me up," Yuu added, shivering.
"Don't worry, onee-chan, it will," Kuro replied, petting her big sister's head.
"Ahhhh..."
"Okay, what are we waiting for?" Ako asked, dressed up. "Let's eat!"
"Oh yes, and I brought a spread," said Teru, pointing to the other dishes on the table. It was Dec. 23, 10 p.m. JST.
"A buffet?" Shizu asked. "You shouldn't have!"
"It's not just for you, Shizu," Ako said as they had a seat and took some from the table to eat, along with the stew,
"Ahhhhh, this isn't too spicy," Yuu said.
"You like it?" Teru asked.
"Very, very good."
"This is awesome," said Arata. "Delicious."
"Good thing you brought the fried chicken, onee-chan," Saki said.
"To be honest," Nodoka whispered. "Saki..."
"Yes, Nodoka?"
"The only thing I'm really...hungry for...is you."
She lifted her chin, "I get that all the time." A kiss.
"Hey, Saki-chan, you gotta share the love, you know!" Shizuno flailed.
"Ahem," Ako said, an anger vein on her head. Shizu turned in horror.
Shizuno backed herself into a corner. "I'm sorry. I forgot! I am a prisoner of your own conscience, Ako-chan! Oh me, never change, myself!"
"Get back to the dinner table and eat, you monkey!" Ako roared, dragging Shizuno back to the table so that she could stuff her face, as usual. "Besides, you chest size needs work."
"Stop pointing that out, I can't help it! I was born this way."
"Heheheheh, just as planned." The other Achiga girls looked at Ako with looks of suspicion. "What, you can't let me bring a little tough love to the dinner table?"
"We're not playing, we're eating and relaxing," Arata said. Shizuno pointing to her mouth, which was stuffing a drumstick whole without choking.
"Shizu! Eat your food properly, that's dangerous!" Ako exclaimed, pounding the dinner table.
"Is Takakamo like that these days?" Nodoka asked Ako.
"She's reached the point in her life where showing off to prove a point is something to live and die by," Kuro added. "Sometimes playing in big tournaments can give you that much swagger."
"Well-earned." Nodoka recollected the tournament that happened months ago, and the legacy it left on all the teams who participated.
"People find different ways of entertaining themselves and others," Teru said, savoring her stew. "Swallowing a piece of chicken with the bone whole is an example."
Saki looked at Teru, and she looked back. Teru just had to pet Saki's head. It felt so good to see Saki smile like that. It was a warm feeling. Neither of them wanted it to end. They were sisters, and that wasn't going to change.
"Everyone," said Saki, "I want to thank you all for coming to my house to celebrate Christmas. It's a time of the year where you all have to be thankful that you're alive, that you live for now, and you live for each other. I don't think you'll have it any other way. So I dedicate this Christmas to all of you and your future. Let's raise a glass. Cheers!"
"Cheers!" they all said, clinking their glasses of cider before sipping and chatting with one another. 10 minutes later, the door rang. "Hello?" asked Kyoutarou Suga outside.
"Oh, Kyoutarou!" Saki said, "Come in!"
He walked in and found a chair to sit. "Ugh, damnit ladies, I had to haul some serious ass today to help someone."
"Ass?" they all asked.
Teru went over to Kyoutarou and lifted his chin. He was sweating and expecting a beatdown. "If you ever think about grabing a woman's behind without permission I am not going to forgive you!" she hissed, fire in her eyes. "I'll kick you ass, boy!"
"It's not what you think!" he cried. "Here, I brought this lady along, she can explain!" He pointed to a lady with long silver hair and emerald blue eyes, a black and pink dress and miniskirt, black boots and a white lab coat.
"Um, who are you?"
"Good evening, everyone!" the woman said. "My name is Thouars, and I am looking for three girls named Nodoka Haramura, Saki Miyanaga and Shizuno Takakamo."
"That would be us," they said, going to her.
Thouars shook their hands. "Good evening, how are you all doing?"
"Fine, I guess," Saki said.
"You look amazing," Shizuno exclaimed.
"Thank you."
"Can I call you Ms. Thouars?"
"Sure!"
"Okay. Well, Ms. Thouars, is there any reason why you're here with us?"
"Well, this is your lucky Christmas holiday!" she exclaimed.
"What do you mean?" Nodoka asked. "I don't know why you're here."
"The government of Japan sent me here to this house to ask the three of you to go on a major life-changing mission."
"A mission?" asked Saki. "What mission?"
"You heard of Santa Claus and how he delivers presents to all the good kids, right? You heard of it?"
They nodded.
"Well guess what? You get to give presents to people this Christmas!"
"What?" Saki said. "How are we gonna do that!? We don't have a sleigh or reindeer and I don't even know how to drive one! You must be joking, right!?"
"Nope. Apparently a connect that I have also signed off on this mission and she wanted me to prepare the vehicle to use and the presents to drive. You guys wanna come see?"
"Sure," they all said.
"Come follow me, come, come..."
"Stay in the house," Teru said to Kyoutarou as the others left to take a look. "Or I'll grab you by the balls and leave you in pain until next year!"
"Yes, ma'am!" Kyoutarou said as the girls closed the door behind them, leaving Kyoutarou alone, sitting on a chair, turning to stone.
"Whoa, holy crap," Shizuno said, looking at the vehicle. It was a updated version of Santa Claus's sleigh, but bigger, with a bubble of presents and a team of nine skaters moving it alone. The skaters were designed to simulate flying reindeer and they all had names: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph. The skaters were busy eating some high-energy snacks and playing table hockey to get fired up for the long voyage that would take place across the country.
"Impressed?" Thouars asked.
"My goodness, Ms. Thouars, this is amazing," Nodoka said.
"The mission that you, Ms. Nodoka, as well as Ms. Saki and Ms. Shizuno will do is called Operation Saimoe Sanshoujo To Ichiban No Kurisumasu, or Operation Saimoe Sanjo Ikuri, or OSSI. Three Girls For One Christmas. The three of you will be driving this sleigh and delivering presents to a number of important women on a predetermined list."
"Whoa," Shizuno said, her lips forming a sideways three.
"You will be doing this for all of Christmas Eve, with the penultimate stop being an important destination, where you will meet someone more important than me. Namely, the girl who started it all."
"Who's that?" Saki asked.
"Trade secret. I cannot say because Aika Tsube would kick my ass if I spilled it."
"Was it her?"
"No, she's just someone I know that I tease, but someone that treats me like a ragdoll because she's flat as an airport."
"I heard that..."
Thouars turned around. "No, I didn't mean that! Owww!" A kick to the face.
"Oh my, what an entrance," Yuu said.
"Hello," said the girl in black twintails. "Aika Tsube, an assistant to Thouars. I helped pack the sleigh with Kyoutarou and also...my significant other, who is here with me. Introduce yourself to these girls, Souji."
"Hi everyone," said Souji Mitsuka. "My name is Souji and I helped prepare the sleigh for the three of you wonderful ladies. Ah, are you Saki?"
"Y...yes," Saki said.
"Nice twintails. Keep it. It defines your awesomeness."
"I bet this guy has a fondness for Jindaii, too," Teru snickered.
"You must be Saki's sister, Teru," Souji said. "I have evidence." He whipped out his iPad and pulled out a nude picture of Komaki Jindai in a compromising position.
"Dear God!"
"I don't discriminate. If you have twintails, you are love. That's how much I adore twintails. I adore it so much that..." He transformed into Tail Red in a school uniform. "...I'm a twintailed girl too!"
"Oh God, I'm seeing everything now," Ako said, a palm to her head.
"Anyway," Nodoka said, "So what we do is ride this sleigh, and deliver presents, right? Are there controls to this."
"Allow me to show you!" Thouars pressed a button on the sleigh next to the reins. A number of touchable screens showed up. "This sleigh, which I call the OSSIO 9000, is a state of the art sleigh powered by magic and men. These human reindeer are designed to help move the sleigh around by skating through the air. These reindeer are conditioned to skate for long periods of time at fast speed to ensure quick, timely and accurate delivery. The sleigh has exact GPS. Saki."
"Yeah."
"I know you're not good directions, but thanks to the OSSIO 9000's GPS, you will know where to go and navigate like a pro."
"But I want to drive a sleigh!" Shizuno flailed.
"Ah, you're the excitable one, aren't you?"
"Yep!"
"All three of you, as well as the human reindeer, will have to take time to recharge and refuel. Allow time for breakfast, lunch and dinner breaks. Because it takes three people to drive this sleigh, it takes three people to make it disappear and reappear so that you don't have parking issues. You need to form a girl sandwich to make it disappear and reappear." Thouars handed Saki, Shizuno and Nodoka rings. "Try it."
"Um, what do I do?" Nodoka asked. Before she knew it, she was stuck in a girl sandwich by Saki and Shizuno and the three of them let out an orgasmic sigh. As they did, the sleigh disappeared.
"Ah? Hey, where did the sleigh go?" Ako asked.
"It disappered," Arata said. "We can go back inside now."
"NO! No, no, no, no, no!" Thouars flailed. "Get back here, I'm not done yet!" They all did, sitting around her. "Saki, Nodoka, Shizuno, sandwich again."
"I could get used to this," Nodoka whispered as she felt the smooth touch of her two love interests.
"Ahhhhhh!" they all said, orgasming, causing the sleigh to reappear. Steam came out of Souji's perverted nostrils, causing Aika to deliver a headbump. Oh Souji. Never change, Souji!
"And there's the sleigh," Thouars said. "This prevents theft of presents and you won't get a ticket for having something like this blocking the driveway or a parking lot when you and the human reindeer are having a break for a meal. Got it?"
"Got it!" the three of them said.
"Now, you need special uniforms for this occasion, since you will be up in the sky going from place to place," said Thouars. "Souji is in a girl mode, so it's fine for her to look."
"Well," Saki said, "we don't generally wear underwear."
"This time, you will have to, or you will freeze to death. Luckily I have special clothes that look like it's too cold for you to wear them but they actually warm you up. First, Shizu, I have a special track jacket."
"Ooooh, ohhhh, let me see!" Shizuno said. "Wow, nice!" It was a red track jacket with white trim and an insignia of Achiga's seal on it to go with her name. On the back was her last name in cursive writing and a silhouette of her striking a pose.
"You don't even have to wear anything underneath except this." It was a boyshorts bottom with a heart in the back and her name in the front with red trim.
"Yes! YES!" As Shizuno put on her outfit, Ako, Nodoka and even Souji blushed, the latter receiving looks of horror from Aika. "I don't even feel like I am wearing anything at all, and yet, I feel so warm! Thanks, Ms. Thouars!"
"Okay. And now, for Miss Saki."
"Oh, I get to wear pants this time?" Saki wondered. It was an stylized Santa outfit, but with a midriff and short shorts to go with the sweater. It included a Santa hat.
"Those aren't pants, Saki," Teru reminded her. "Those are shorts."
"Oh, sorry about that, ahahahaah!"
"No problem. Try em on! Do it, do it, do it..."
"Okay." Soon enough, after casting her current clothes aside, she put on her custom-made Santa outfit. "Wow, I feel warm in this. And...I feel my aura...haaaaah..."
"These outfits are embedded with a built in technology that replicates the mantra and mojo you get playing mahjong. In short," said Thouars, "a performance booster."
"Whoa," Shizuno said. "No wonder I feel like I'm on fire and I want to make out with Ako-chan right now!"
"Hey, Shizu, what are you thinking!?" Ako exclaimed.
"This outfit, is made with...burning...LOVE!" A kiss.
"Jeez Shizu, not in front of everyone..."
"Burning...love..." Souji whispered, touching herself while drooling.
"S...Souji! Stop that!" Aika said, shaking her significant other back into sanity.
"Heheheheheh...hehehehehehehe..." The other girls were looking at her with flat gazes.
"What about me, Ms. Thouars?" asked Nodoka.
"Your ring has a special ability. Give it a kiss," she said.
Nodoka kissed the ring. In a flash of light, she transformed into her Nodocchi online avatar. "Oh my...I've turned into...!"
"Like it?"
"Wow," Shizuno said, stars in her eyes. "It's the Nodocchi! Mou!" Angry, Shizuno motorboated her for a bit. "Nodocchi! Why must you be so angel! Not fair! Grrrrr! Rrrrrrriojgiofsdgjdfiogjdfgiofsdjs..."
"All right, snap out of it," Ako said, dragging Shizuno away by the ear. "Is your nose, bleeding?"
Shizu's nose was bleeding, her eyes were empty, and she laid a creepy smile on her fiancee. "Ako-chan. Take care of everything. Take care of my family. And tell Ms. Harue that...I did my best,.." She then closed her eyes as Ako's eyes misted.
"Oh, and, Shizu, you can't die from wearing your Santa outfit," Thouars said.
Shizu's eyes opened up and her catlike smile returned. "Good morning!" she exclaimed, knocking Ako out.
"It's night," they all said.
"Is there a wolf outside?"
"Yeooooooooo!" exclaimed one of the human reindeer.
"I called it! I win the lottery! I am boss!"
"No, Shizu, you're just an idiot," Ako deadpanned.
"An idiot that will be doing the greatest deed of good known to Japanese onna no ko! Right, Ms. Thouars?"
"You are in the holiday spirit, Ms. Shizuno! High five!"
The exchange. "Yeay! Ho ho ho!"
"Oh yeah, that reminds me Ms. Nodoka, you need a coat, to go with that." She tossed over a long red petticoat with white fur trim.
As Nodoka wore the petticoat, the halo and headpiece turned into a Santa hat and the wings folded. "I suppose this is a bit more modest," she said.
"Mmm-hmmm, looking sharp. Well, the reindeer team are almost finished warming up, so make sure to get filled up because this expedition is starting soon. We need to get going."
"Saki, are you sure this is fine with you?" Teru asked.
"Big sis, I'll be fine," she said, exchanging a pinkie swear.
"You are representing our family. Make mom and dad proud, as well as me, when you go on this mission. Ms. Thouars."
"Yes?" she asked, the other Achiga girls looking at the huge orb of presents behind the seats.
"How will my sister get back home?"
"Well, the final stop is here. So when all the presents are delivered and all the destinations are visited, they will drop off the sleigh, head home and have a good rest.
"What about you, Souji and Aika?"
"They're gonna stay here to monitor the voyage and make sure there are no issues."
"You must have a lot of pressure to ensure this goes smoothly, huh?"
"Ms. Teru, If I wasn't getting paid to do this, this task can bugger off for all I care."
"Spoken like a true professional," Teru conceded. "Saki,"
"Yes?"
"Did all three of you eat?" Saki pointed to the empty containers of food. "You finished it all. Wow."
"We did," Kuro said. "Thanks for the meal."
"All right. At least that didn't go to waste."
"Please cook more of your stew," Yuu said. "The heat...turns me on..."
"What are you implying?"
She crept in closer, and her aura was deep like purple. "Everything..."
"Okay, onee-chan, you're a guest, don't scare Teru!" Kuro said, pulling Yuu back. Teru smiled and nodded.
"Well?" asked Thouars to Saki, Nodoka and Shizuno. "Are you ready to go on the adventure of your life?"
"Yes, ma'am!" they all said.
"Okay, well, get on board and make yourselves comfortable. Also, the sleigh comes with endless snacks and drinks so you won't feel like you can't do this."
The three of them did. "Who's gonna drive first?" Saki asked.
"Me! Me! Me!" Shizuno said.
"You got it," Nodoka said.
"Wow, to be driving a sleight with Nodoka-chan and Saki-chan and being Santa...oh yeah!" The human reindeer were attaching themselves to their assigned stations.
"All right," Thouars said. "When you're ready, press the button that says in English, 'Let's Do This!' Have a great trip and send those presents."
"Don't screw up!" Ako said.
"Good luck," replied Arata.
"I'm already sleepy," added Yuu.
"We'll see you later," said Kuro.
"Did I miss anything?" Kyoutarou asked.
"Nothing," Souji said. "Good luck, the three of you."
"We'll keep track of your progress!" exclaimed Aika. "Get it done! Your country needs you!"
"HAVE A NICE TRIP!" they all said.
"Ready?" Shizuno asked Saki and Nodoka.
"Ready!"
"On the count of three...one...two...three!" They all pressed the "Let's Do This!" button, which disappeared and the sleigh levitated. A series of monitors shows up on the screen as the others below rentered the Miyanaga house.
"This is cool," Saki said. "But...directions..." Trembling.
"Don't worry, I got your back."
"Let's see, it says here," said Nodoka, "Welcome to the OSSIO 9000. This is Operation Saimoe Sanjo Ikuri 2014. Three Girls. One Christmas."
"Hmmmm," Shizuno said. "Wow, we are above Earth here. Okay, now what?"
A monitor popped up. "Hello, can you see me?"
"Thouars!" they all said.
"Yeah, you can drop the Miss from now on. Anyway, welcome to your sleigh. Let's get started. Your first mission: send presents to Otonokizaka High School in Akihabara, Tokyo. You are in Nagano City. These reindeer are programmed how to get there. Press this button next to me," she said, showing a floating button icon, "then crack the whip. Good luck!"
"All right!" Shizuno said, tapping the green button then cracking the whip. "Let's goooooo!" The human reindeer moved like a pack of short track speed skaters in synchronized motion as the sleigh took off for Tokyo.
"Wow, I hope I don't fall off!" Saki cried, eyes spiraling out.
"The magic in this sleigh prevents you from falling since all of you have hearts pure as water from the French Alps, maybe purer," Thouars said.
"Oh, thank goodness."
"Saki, I brought Etopen along," said Nodoka. "If you want, you can rest on my breasts so that you won't fall off."
Saki hung on for dear life, her face snuggled on top of her lover's cleavage. "This is why I love you, Nodoka. This is why."
"Um, Thouars?" asked Shizuno.
"Yep?" she asked.
"Does this sleigh have music?"
"The OSSIO 9000 has songs from every country from every time period. Your mind determines the choices, so you won't have to press any buttons on screen."
"Cool. Okay, can I choose a song first, guys?"
"Mmm-hmmm," said a blushing Saki, petted by a similarly blushing Nodoka. They were both smiling knowingly at Shizuno.
With a wink and a nod, Shizuno picked her song.
"Feeling light inside
Coming back to life
Open up my eyes
Finally alive
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
Feeling light inside
Coming back to life
Open up my eyes
Finally alive
Pass it out some more
I hear the lions roar
Deep inside of me
Sayin' "It's time that you are free"
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
Shining in the bright light, bright light
All the children come alive
We come alive!"
"I always envision a gang of dumb robots doing the moonwalk amidst a shower of fireworks to that song," Shizuno said.
"Looking at the itinerary, we are 30 minutes away from reaching Akihabara and our first destination," said Nodoka.
"Mmmm," Saki said. "Hey, I see city names and street names below, as well as a list of nearest cities." On the monitors were different scenes from different shows, perhaps featuring the people that the three were to deliver presents to.
"Okay, can I choose another song?" Shizu asked as the human reindeer continued to skate through the skies and tow the sleigh.
"No rush," Nodoka replied.
"Cool." Two seconds later, a new song played.
"Despertar
a un estado de lucidez.
Despertar,
no hay engaño esta vez.
Despertar,
hay un sentido y no lo ves.
El ritmo va
cuando resplandecés.
Pienso seguir,
no somos tan distintos.
Quizás no existe un fin.
Y este calor
(Hey! Tu calor...)
se queda en mí.
(Y voy perdido en esta danza...)
Despertar
a un estado de lucidez.
Despertar,
no hay engaño esta vez.
Despertar,
hay un sentido y no lo ves.
El ritmo va
cuando resplandecés.
Pienso seguir,
no somos tan distintos.
Quizás no existe un fin.
Y este calor
(Hey! Tu calor...)
se queda en mí.
(Y voy perdido en esta danza...)
Pienso seguir...
Pienso seguir,
no somos tan distintos.
Quizás no existe un fin.
Y este calor
(Hey! Tu calor...)
se queda en mí.
(Y voy perdido en esta danza...)"
"Ugh," said a tired Nico Yazawa to the others from mu's as they decided to celebrate a successful concert celebrating their accomplishments the previous Spring. All of them were in college and elected to attend the same university, JWU, so that they could perform together. "That was a concert, wasn't it?"
"It's nice to come back for a bit and reflect on how things have changed since," said Eli Ayase, watching the snow fall down at the Otonokizaka campus.
"I really miss this place," Honoka Kousaka said. "It's come a long way."
"Everything is so beautiful now," Kotori Minami added. "The school is now in good financial standing."
"And a lot of donors have stepped up to keep the place alive, too," Nozomi Toujou said. "We got them to contribute."
"I wish I could do it all over again and go through all the difficult times we did to keep this place alive," said Maki Nishikino.
"You're only young once," said Umi Sonoda. "As for us, we have to move on."
"The good thing is that the college life is doing wonders for us now, so now we have something to fall back on," said Rin Hoshizora. "Wouldn't you agree?"
"Yeah," they all said, reflecting.
"This must be the school," Shizuno said from the sleigh. "Hey, we're here."
"Whoa, look at all the lights," said Saki. "This was where I had the tournament a while back. Nice memories."
"Very bright," Nodoka said. "Tokyo is so beautiful in the evening."
"Let's look at the screen," said Shizu. "It says, 'Destination Reached. Deploy gifts?' I shall press...YES." She pressed the YES button, and nine large gift boxes came out and parachuted to the ground below. "Let's see what happens."
"Hey guys, big news!" exclaimed Hanayo Koizumi to the girls. "Over here!"
"What is it?" asked Honoka.
"Presents!"
"Wow," the girls said.
"These are Christmas presents!" exclaimed Nico. "I wanted this on my wish list. Everything on my wish list is in this box."
"Oh my god," Umi gasped. "I feel like I'm in heaven! Heaven! HEAVEN!"
"This is amazing," Kotori said. "I never got this many presents in a box! Wow. There really is a god!"
"But who would do this?" Rin asked as they talked among themselves and rummaged through their gifts.
The only one who wasn't talking with the others was Honoka, who was looking at the sleigh from a distance. Shizuno saw a visual of Honoka, who was smiling. Shizu put a finger to her mouth and said through telekinesis, "Keep this a secret from your friends. The best mahjong players in the country send their greetings. Merry Christmas and take care of yourselves."
"Thank you, Happy Holidays from mu's," she replied back, also through telekinesis and a smile.
With a wink, Shizuno pointed to the human reindeer and the sleigh took off.
"All right, so, what will be the next mission?" asked Shizu, who looking at different maps, and even checking out restaurants for breakfast. It close to midnight, Christmas Eve.
"Well, according to the list, your next mission is to deliver presents to a place called the Rabbit House Cafe," Thouars said.
"Rabbit House Cafe? Where's that?" A visual showed, as well as the directions to get there. "Oh, it's 20 minutes from here."
"Since it's also located in a house called the Kafuu residence," Thouars said, "you should be able to deliver this without issue. Pro-tip: come back to this place when breakfast is served. Prices are cheap."
"Nodoka-chan's got plenty of cash so we'll be good," Shizuno said. "Right, Nodoka-chan."
"I'm not a bank, you know," she pouted.
Shizu immediately made a groping gesture and said, "Remember how Touka left you wanting for more? I can give you 100 times that so that you finish this mission with no clothes on. Do you want that?"
"Fine, fine, fine, I give up! I don't want my dignity ruined any more than it is, jeez!"
"Take it easy, Nodoka, we're just getting started," Saki said, shaking her head. Nodoka didn't believe her.
"You know how to do this, right?" said Thouars over the monitor.
"Yep!"
"All right, let's do it! Have fun!" A button tap and a crack of the whip, and the sleigh set sail for Chino Kafuu's house. This time, Saki chose the song.
"Wandering out into the sea of streetlights
Calling up everyone I know
Trying our best to keep our monsters inside
Nobody wants to be alone
But tonight, we're all believers
And I feel all right, with all of my heart
Oh tonight, we're all believers
And I'll be all right, as long as you are
Running our hands over the stone and pavement
Giving up all the fights and complications
Nobody tells you that the city's different
Nobody wants to be alone
But tonight, we're all believers
And I feel all right, with all of my heart
Oh tonight, we're all believers
And I'll be all right, as long as you are
How could you say that I was too in love to remember myself?
How could you say I left you waiting up on the shelf?
The colors are dangerous, they shine so bright, thunder and lightning
How could you say this was a home?
But tonight, we're all believers
And I feel all right, with all of my heart
Oh tonight, we're all believers
And I'll be all right, as long as you are
Tonight, we're all believers
And I feel all right, with all of my heart
Oh tonight, we're all believers
And I'll be all right, as long as you are."
"Smooth music for the evening," Saki said, drinking a can of coffee to stay alert. "So it says here we are 15 minutes away from reaching the place."
"Time for one more song, Saki?" asked Nodoka.
"I got just the thing," she replied.
"I woke up on Champs-Élysées to the Djembe of Ghana
A fine lady from Belize said "You got the spirit of a Fela"
A young one dripping make-up put her hands out to holla
I gave her what I got but couldn't handle her broken heart
The right words in the hands of dissidents with the fire
Will rip apart the marrow from the bone of the liars
Well I'm afraid of saying too much and ending a martyr
But even more so I'm afraid to face god and say I was a coward, yeah
Will all these things I wait for revelation
These things make me want to duck for cover
With all these things I wait for revolution
These things ask the biggest question to me
And it's are you what you want to be
So are you what you want to be?
The war machines will put out both its hands for a dollar
It's drinking at the table with the chrome hand guerrillas
The young ones dripping make-up lift her leg up to holla
Well, I told her what she's got should be protected in the arms of love
The right things in the hands of dissidents with the fire
Will rip apart the marrow from the bone of the liars
Well I'm afraid of saying too much and ending a martyr
But even more so I'm afraid to face god and say I was a coward
Will all these things I wait for revelation
These things make me want to duck for cover
With all these things I wait for revolution
These things ask the biggest question to me
And it's are you what you want to be
So are you what you want to be?
Are you what you want to be
Are you what you want to be
Are you what you want to be?
Are you what you want to be
Are you what you want to be?"
Chino Kafuu was in her personal dreamland. All of her coworkers at the Rabbit House Cafe decided to sleepover for the holidays and was enveloped in a girl sandwich with Rize Tedeza and her love interest, Cocoa Hoto. Meanwhile, Chiya Ujimatsu, who decided to come in on her own terms was embracing Cocoa, Sharo Kirima was spooning Rize, and all of them were in their pajamas, except for Rize, who was sporting a babydoll and purple underwear.
"Don't stop," Chino whispered through her lustful sighs, purring like a cat through her deep blushes of love.
"Chino...so cute," Cocoa said through her hitched breathing, drawing her to her bosom.
"Rize-sempai," murmured Sharo, "I'm lonely...I'm..."
"Sharo," Rize whispered. "Hang in there, don't let go."
"Cocoa...smells so good..." Chiya said, snuggling her short brown hair as she spooned her through her tears of passion.
Tippy, the main pet and mascot of the cafe, was looking out the window and noticed a large package floating down. "Chino," he grunted.
"G...Grandpa?"
"Outside. Outside." Chino slowly got up and left the bedroom to go outside and have a look.
"Ehhhhhh, Chino, don't be rash and leave me this way," Cocoa murmured, drooling.
"What is it?" asked Chino to Tippy. She heard music. "Airy...guitar? Foster The People?" The she saw the oversized gift box. "A Christmas present?" She could see Shizuno from above doing a pressing gesture. Chino saw a button on a corner of the box. She pressed it, and the crated opened to reveal eight separate gift boxes: one for all of her friends, and even Aoyama Blue Mountain, too, as well as Maya Jouga and Megumi Natsu. "Christmas presents." A smile was on her face. "You guys...you are real after all," she said through telekinesis.
"We'll be back for breakfast but don't tell the others we were here earlier," Saki replied through telekinesis. "Bring the gifts to the house and then go back to sleep. Ask the others to help you." After Chino nodded, Saki pointed to the reindeer and the OSSI team took off.
"Grandpa..." Chino said.
"What?" Tippy asked.
A sneeze. "It's cold."
"All right, next assignment?" asked Saki, pumping her fists at the screen as the sleigh flew.
"Well, you guys are a bit ahead of schedule," said Thouars, "But better early than late, and better late then never."
"So what's the next assignment?" asked Shizuno, eating a banana suggestively, to the chagrin of Nodoka.
"Eating while driving is bad," warned Thouars,
"Ummm..." Nodoka was pointing to her. She was taking the reins.
"Okay, that's good. Anyway, you're next assignment is to send presents to the Oomiya household, since the child of the house brought her friends over for the holidays and some presents are due. Close by as well. Slow the pace down a bit, it's only 1 a.m."
"Thanks, Thouars," Nodoka said. A tap and a crack, and they were off. "It's my turn to choose a song," she replied. "Time for a little something from the 1990s."
"That decade had really good dance music," Shizuno added.
"Here's one." The sleigh slowed down its flight and was essentially hovering over the skies of Tokyo. Some onlookers noticed the sleigh because the music was loud and took photos. That would go viral in hours.
"Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
Money, sex, in full control, a generation without soul,
perfect people in a perfect world, behind closed doors all in control,
life, in a world of luxury, cold cash money mentality,
you gotta keep the faith, you gotta keep the faith,
you better keep the faith and run away.
It's time to break free, oh oh oh oh, run away, oh oh oh oh,
you better break free, oh oh oh oh, run away, oh oh oh oh.
Money, sex, in full control, look, big brother is watching you,
unlock your brain and save your soul, no more limits, no more curfew,
life in the perfect system, take a stand and fight for freedom,
keep the faith, you gotta keep the faith,
you better keep the faith and run away.
Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
Run away, Run away, run away and save your life.
Run away, run away, run away if you want to survive.
It's time to break free, oh oh oh oh, run away,
oh oh oh oh, you better break free, oh oh oh oh,
run away, oh oh oh oh
Keep the faith, you gotta keep the faith,
you better keep the faith and run away.
Keep the faith, you gotta keep the faith,
you better keep the faith and run away."
"Wow, that song does take me back a bit," said Shizuno. "I think my parents were listening to this music back then. When I was younger, I would hear all those 90's music. Can you play another one, Nodoka-chan?"
"I got just the thing," she replied, pointing to the player. The human reindeer skated as one, in sync to the tempo.
"What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Yeah, yeah
I don't know why you're not there
I give you my love, but you don't care
So what is right?
And what is wrong?
Gimme a sign
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Oh, I don't know, what can I do?
What else can I say, it's up to you
I know we're one
Just me and you
I can't go on
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
What is love?
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
I want no other, no other lover
This is our life, our time
When we are together, I need you forever
Is it love?
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Yeah
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love?"
"I love Christmas," said Karen Kujou inside Shinobu Oomiya's bedroom of the Oomiya house, where she was a guest, along with Youko Inokuma, Aya Komichi and Alice Cartelet. "Nobody gives me presents these days, though. I'm sad."
"Do you even deserve any?" asked Alice sheepishly. Shinobu was idly playing with her hair, humming.
"Of course I do." To English. "You must treat a woman like a lady!" Back to Japanese. "Not like a piece of dirt, you know?"
"That's not the point," Aya said. "You are not entitled to gifts. It takes luck and sometimes you have to earn them."
"Jeez, this country." Back to English. "O Japan! Never change!" She also said that in Japanese, a testament to her deliberate bilingual idiosyncracy. A glare outside. "Wha? What is going on?"
"Something is outside?" asked Shinobu, opening her eyes.
"Shinobu, go check it out," Karen said. To English, with a Kongou-style yawn. "I'm just sleeping now..."
"There must be something outside," said Shinobu's sister Isami, who was opening the door as the two Oomiya sisters left the house to see a number of presents parachute down. "Christmas presents?"
Shinobu looked up at the sky and saw the sleigh. Shizuno was flashing a vulcan symbol and her eyes were like rings to go with her catlike smile. Shinobu flashed in back and whispered, "Merry Christmas." Shizu nodded, and with a salute and a pointing at the human reindeer, the sleigh took off.
"Oy, Shinobu, are you going to help me bring these over?" asked Isami. She also had a present for herself.
"Umm..." She pointed to the others, who also came down.
"Ooooh! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good waifu!" Karen exclaimed in Engrish.
"That's night, Karen. Night," Alice said.
"Good night!" But before she could leave, Alice dragged her over to have her grab her present. "I wonder what's for me. A dress? Jewelry?" And back to English. "A sex toy?"
"Can you get your mind out of the gutter and get back to the bedroom with your gift so we can open them? I fear the minds of the vile Arsenal fans have gotten to you."
"Yare, yare...no fun police! Super super tease!"
The others groaned. "Karen..."
"This is so much fun," said Saki. "This really is an escape from having to do lots and lots of mahjong work."
"It is fun, Saki," said Nodoka. "It's 2 a.m., and we have a long way to go."
"Are you ready for the next mission?" Thouars asked. She was footjobbing Kyoutarou so that he could turn to stone as his love deserted him like rats off the Good Ship Lollipop.
"Bring it on," Shizuno said, eyes fiery like a Texas tornado.
"Your next mission: head out of the city and head to Asahigaoka to deliver presents to the Asahigaoka Branch School. That's presents for all the staff and students. It's located far from here, so you will need to up the pace a bit this time. The coordinates are displayed as shown. This will take one hour if you go top speed. Good luck!"
"All right," Shizuno said, tapping the button and cracking the whip. "We're heading to the country. Saki-chan, you wanna choose a song?"
"No, you first," she replied.
"Well, I'll choose a country song, then."
A twang, "Um, Shizuno, this isn't country, this is rock."
"Ooops." It was deliberate, though. Mississippi riverboat blues from Portland, Ore.
"Well I'm so above you
And it's plain to see
But I came to love you anyway
So you pulled my heart out
And I don't mind bleeding
Any old time you keep me waiting
Waiting, waiting
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
I'm a lonely boy
I'm a lonely boy
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
Well your mama kept you but your daddy left you
And I should've done you just the same
But I came to love you
Am I born to bleed?
Any old time you keep me waiting
Waiting, waiting
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
I'm a lonely boy
I'm a lonely boy
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
Hey!
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting
I'm a lonely boy
I'm a lonely boy
Oh, oh-oh I got a love that keeps me waiting!"
"I'm tired of this slave plantation rock music," said Saki. "Not my type. Can we play a song more accustomed to driving?"
"Just leave it to me!" Shizuno said. "Guys, ever heard of Afrojack?"
"I heard of his name from somewhere," Nodoka said. "He's a DJ, right?"
"You might know this song. Here it is."
"Let's go take a ride in your car
I will take the passenger seat
Baby, we don't have to go far
Unless you wanna show
Me a lovely place out of town
Where you feel most at ease
Well you are the one that I like
Always will be
I think it's time to let you know
The way I feel when you take hold
One single touch from you, I'm gone
Still got the rush when I'm alone
I think it is time I let you know
Take all of me, I will devote
You set me free, my body's yours
It feels the best when you're involved
I want you to take over control
Take over control
Take take take take over control
Oh oh oh, I want you to take over control
Plug it in and turn me on
I want you to take over control
Take over control
Take take take take over control
Oh oh oh, I want you to take over control
Plug it in and turn me on
I want you to take over control
Take over control
Take take take take over control
Oh oh oh, I want you to take over control
Plug it in and turn me on
Baby, baby, can't you see?
That I'm giving all of me
So, it's up to you now
We could let time pass away
I'll make an excuse to play
But, it's up to you now
Just wanna fulfill your needs
While you're taking over me
So, what do you want now?
Take a picture, make a show
'Cause nobody has to know
All the ways that we get down
I want you to take over control
Take over control
Take take take take over control
Oh oh oh, I want you to take over control
Plug it in and turn me on
Oh, oh whoa oh
Oh, oh whoa ooh oh
Plug it in and turn me on
Oh, oh whoa oh
Oh, oh whoa ooh oh
Plug it in and turn me on
Oh, oh whoa oh
Oh, oh whoa ooh oh
Oh, oh whoa oh
Oh, oh whoa ooh oh
Plug it in and turn me on
(On, on, on, on, on...)
Plug it in and turn me on
(On, on, on, on, on...)"
In the summer, Asahigaoka, Japan was warm, sunny and a bit humid, but in the winter, it was cold and snowy. A snowstorm has arrived, and residents of the village were snowed in. They were receiving some aid from the local prefectural government, but some more help was needed.
"So this must be the place," said Shizuno. "Look at all that snow! Wow..."
"The school is here," Saki said. "Small place. Thouars told us to leave the present here."
"Bombs away," Nodoka said, pressing a button, dropping a crate that included equipment to warm up the local residents. Aside from the equipment, the crate included gifts for the students and staff of the school.
For some strange reason, Hotaru Ichijou was out on the town, bundled in layers to build a snowman but noticed the crate lying outside the school. "Hmmm?" She went over and saw a button that said, "Press here." She pressed it, and the crate opened to reveal important equipment for the residents and gifts. "Wow...I hope the locals get a load of this. Christmas is saved!" She then noticed a special gift box with her name on it. "A present for me..."
"Hotaru, you shouldn't be out at this time," said Renge Miyauchi, walking over to her. "What is that you're holding?"
"Get all the others out here, we have presents and equipment to handle the snow!"
"Present? A present for me?" Renge had tears in her eyes. "Unbelievable. Wow..."
"What's going on?" asked Natsumi Koshigaya, walking over.
"Hey, wait up!" said her sister Komari. "There's a lot of boxes here."
"Presents, everyone. The teachers also have presents, too," Hotaru said.
"Wow. So Santa is real after all!" Natsumi exclaimed. "I thought this was fake! It's true! I'm not crazy after all."
"Um, everyone, look up," Hotaru exclaimed. "A sleigh!"
The girls looked up and saw the sleigh hovering above them so they could see them.
"Is that...hey now, it's the Santa Nodocchi!" Natsumi shouted. "She's here! She is real! The mythical Santa Nodocchi, the successor of Santa Claus that is all about that bass and no treble because the old guy can't do it anymore, so they have to send out a broad to do the man's job. The legend is true after all! For real!"
"Did you just make all that up?" Komari snarked with a pout. Natsumi did a dojikko pose.
"THANK YOU SANTA NODOCCHI!" the girls shouted as one.
"Ohohoho, be good to everyone you're with and be safe out here! It's cold outside!" Nodoka said in character. "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!"
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" they replied. And with a pointing of the reindeer, the sleigh took off. "YAAAAAY!"
"Well, we just blew our cover, didn't we?" Shizu said smugly.
"Just as planned," Nodoka replied, looking back while blushing.
"You mean that was deliberate!? O Santa Nodocchi! Never change!" Shizu's dramatic mind was part of her mystique.
"Next mission?" Saki asked Thouars on the intercom as the sleigh left Asahigaoka while giving Shizu a headbump.
"Hmmm, this next mission forces you to go back to the city. The next place to drop presents is Soubu High School. I believe three people are due presents for this mission and all you have to do is drop the crate. Easy peasy."
"Cool," she replied.
"Afterwards, I suggest you get breakfast back at the Cafe for everyone on the team. Good luck!"
"What song should we play?" asked Nodoka to the others.
"How about a little Saint Motel?" Shizuno suggested as the sleigh raced towards Soubu High School.
"That's just my type."
"Take a look around the room
Love comes wearing disguises.
How to go about and choose?
Break it down by shapes and sizes.
I'm a man who's got very specific taste.
You-you-you're just my type
Oh, you got a pulse and you are breathing
You-you-you're just my type
Uuh, I think it's time that we get leaving
You-you-you're just my type
When there's loving in the air,
Don't fight it, just keep breathing.
I can't help myself but stare
Double check for double meanings.
I'm a man who's got very specific taste.
You-you-you're just my type
Oh, you got a pulse and you are breathing
You-you-you're just my type
Uuh, i think its time that we get leaving
You-you-you're just my type
Uuuh uu.
Uuuuu uu uh
You-you-you're just my type
Oh, you got a pulse and you are breathing
You-you-you're just my type
Uuh, I think it's time that we get leaving
You-you-you're just my type!"
"That's big band music fit for driving a sleigh like this," Saki said.
"Yes, yes," Shizuno said, still nodding her head from side to side like a lemming on a Tuesday afternoon in the Bahamas.
"Can I bring up another 90's song before we reach the school?" asked Nodoka.
"After that, it should be my turn," Saki shot back.
"No problem. You know, Bastille actually made a terrible medley version of this so here is the original. Basketball comes to mind when this song come up. You can imagine."
"Hmmmmm," they both said.
"This is the rhythm of the night
The night, oh yeah
The rhythm of the night
This is the rhythm of my life
My life, oh yeah
The rhythm of my life
You could put some joy upon my face
Oh sunshine in an empty place
Take me to turn to and babe I'll make you stay
Oh I can ease you of your pain
Feel you give me love again
Round and round we go, each time I hear you say
This is the rhythm of the night
The night, oh yeah
The rhythm of the night
This is the rhythm of my life
My life, oh yeah
The rhythm of my life
Won't you teach me how to love and learn
There'll be nothing left for me to yearn
Think of me and burn and let me hold your hand
I don't want to face the world in tears
Please think again I'm on my knees
Sing that song to me
No reason to repent
I know you want to say it
This is the rhythm of the night
The night, oh yeah
The rhythm of the night
This is the rhythm of my life
My life, oh yeah
The rhythm of my life
This is the rhythm of the night
The night, oh yeah
The rhythm of the night
This is the rhythm of my life
My life, oh yeah
The rhythm of my life..."
A lone janitor was getting ready to open up the school to do some early morning yard work, perhaps a little snow shoveling. He noticed that a large sleigh was slowly easing its way in and would hove over the grounds. "Santa?" he muttered.
"This is it!" Nodoka said. "And...go!" A button press and a crate slowly parachuted down to the entrance. The janitor had to run for his life so that he didn't get crushed.
"What's going on here?" asked Hachiman Hikigaya, walking over with his sister Komachi, Yukino Yukinoshita and Yui Yuigahama.
"A button?" Komachi asked. "Can I press it?"
"Sure."
"Okay!"
"What's going on?" Yui asked Yukino.
"There is a sleigh floating above us," she replied.
"Ahhhh, it's Santa! He's here! He's here! Santa is...a she?" Yui blinked. "Ah, there are three Santas!"
"More like three women on a sleigh and those aren't reindeers. They look like speed skaters in short track."
"Presents!" Komachi exclaimed.
"Presents?" Yui asked.
"Hey, why isn't there anything for me?" Hachiman asked the others.
"Because in the eyes of men, Santa isn't real, and Santa is really a fat woman like the one above us right now!"
"I...I'm not fat!" cried a blushing Nodoka, teary-eyed.
"Ah, Yui, you made Santa cry," Komachi said. "You shouldn't do that or you'll get coal!"
"Sorry!" Yui said, bowing.
Nodoka wagged her finger and said through telekinesis. "Next time I will put you on the naughty list if you make fun of my appearance. Santa was fat in his day too, you know, and no one made fun of him."
"I...am such a fool," Yui said, imitating Sayaka Miki.
"Stop, Santa forgives you, snap out of it," Hachiman said. "I did get a present." He was pointing to his box.
"What is it?" asked the others.
"Porn."
The girls all proceeded to bury Hachiman in snow. "Merry Christmas, Santa!" they all said to the three on the sleigh.
"Merry Christmas," Nodoka said. She pointed to the reindeer, and they were off. It was 5 a.m.
"The good thing about this," said Nodoka as the sleigh touched down outside the cafe, which would open in a few minutes, "is that we know where to go for breakfast."
"Yep," Saki said. "So, how about a sandwich?"
"Yes, I want a sandwich," Shizuno whispered lustily.
Nodoka was soon sandwiched as they orgasmed and came at once, the sleigh disappeared and the girls and human reindeer were in casual outfits. The human reindeer now looked like identical salarymen or e-sports gamers from Korea with very thick-rimmed glasses and brown suits.
"I suppose wearing normal clothes with underwear would suffice," Shizuno conceded. "First time I ever wore jeans."
"Soon, it will grow on you," Saki added, flashing her hip-huggers with an ass shake, causing Nodoka's face to turn into a rose.
The door opened. "Come on in!" said Chino. Then she noticed that it was the team from earlier in the evening. She was left shaking.
"I told you we would be back," Saki said to her through telekinesis, a finger to her lips.
"You weren't kidding," she replied. "I better not let them know..."
"Um, Chino-chan?" asked Sharo, putting a hand on Chino's shoulder, causing her to shriek a bit. "Do you know these people?"
She immediately regained her senses. "These are new guests. You know what to do."
The crew immediately took their seats and began ordering. "The boys here want all the coffee items you have," Nodoka said. "No latte art?" The men flashed X's to indicate no. "Just straight up, no latte art."
"I guess this is business stuff for them," Cocoa said. "Oh, I'm Cocoa. Chino just greeted you. The other ones in our staff are Rize, Sharo and Chiya, who is actually an employee at another restaurant but is helping out for this week. Ask us if you need anything, and welcome to the Rabbit House Cafe."
"Give us all the food items on the menu," Nodoka said.
"My goodness!" Cocoa exclaimed. "All of the items!? Are you that hungry?"
"We need the fuel because we have...important matters to take care of..."
"Can you finish it all?"
"We can," Saki, Shizuno and Nodoka said.
Cocoa looked at Chino, who was blushing and sweating. "Can you tell me what's going on here?"
"I can't say...I can't say..." she said to herself, hiding her face with a round tray in a corner, about to turn to stone.
"Chino, you have to tell us what's going on here," Rize replied.
"Something's the matter?" asked Chiya.
"Nothing, nothing, it's nothing!" Chino said, the blush even deeper.
Sharo looked at the three girls at the table. A vision of Santa outfits and a sleigh. She turned to Chino. "These are the girls from earlier this morning, aren't they?" she said through telekinesis.
"I give up, yes, it's them!" she replied, through her tears and telekinesis.
"Rize-sempai, coffee please."
"Here," said Rize, handing Sharo a can.
She juiced it down in five second. "YOU'RE THE GIRLS AND GUYS FROM EARLIER THIS MORNING AREN'T YOU!?"
The people seated groaned. Chino was inconsolable, crying as she was forced to give it away.
"Are you mad at us?" Saki asked.
Sharo's eyes lit up. "You...are...AWESOME!" She proceeded to glomp Saki incessantly, squealing like crazy. "My heroes! My Christmas Angels. Thank you so much for the presents! We appreciate it! Woo hoo!"
"The pleasure's all ours, I guess," Nodoka said.
"You know what," Chino said, taking the bill. She ripped it. "Everything is on us today, thanks to you."
"Wow," they all said.
"You gave us the presents we wanted, so we'll give you what we have to offer for free." Chino snapped her fingers, and the kitchen staff immediately created a spread with all the dishes and beverages available, minus the alcohol.
"Now this is the Breakfast of Champions right here," Shizu said, digging into a hot, steaming plate of Napolitan. "This is a knockout! Delicious!"
"A secret recipe developed by my grandfather." Chino pointed to Tippy, who was on her head.
"This is your grandfather?" Saki asked.
"This pet of mine's, Tippy, has the spirit of my grandpa and is the mascot and guardian of this place."
"Good morning," Tippy said. "Thank you."
The three girls nodded. "Our pleasure," said Nodoka.
"So what do you guys do for a living?" asked Rize while the boys drank the coffee, ate some pastries and talked amongst themselves.
"We're students, but we're aspiring to be mahjong professionals," Shizu said. "We want to promote our style of the game around the world."
"Wow, You must be very good at this huh?" asked Chiya.
"We've won trophies and we took part in a national tournament a while back," Saki added. "So I have to say we're good."
"Do you have any special abilities?" asked Sharo.
"For me, it's rinshan kaihou, tsumo after a kan. +/- 0 ability, and I can actually manipulate numbers of my competitors so I can win hands easily."
"As for me," Nodoka said, "I play the game online as well as offline. I specialize in speed and quick hands. People call me Nodocchi, and that is the name of my online avatar."
"I'm the opposite of Nodoka," said Shizuno. "I build up power if a match goes on longer. I negate the ability of players over time and also have the ability to nullify them."
"A number manipulator, a quick-drawing angel, and a nullifier," Chino said. "Good thing I don't play mahjong for a living, I end up becoming weird like these guys."
"Well, so what will you guys do after you finish breakfast?" asked Cocoa.
"We have more gifts to send and more places to visit, I think," Nodoka said. "We started at about 11 last night, and we should finish by midnight tonight."
"You're not gonna get tired, are you?"
"From what I'm told, the sleigh we have keeps us refreshed," Saki said, recalling details she saw at the beginning of the trip. "So we can do this all day. I think when we're done, we'll feel sleepy and melt."
"You actually melt into nothing?" Chino said, alarmed.
"Calm down," Cocoa said, nibbling her ear to calm Chino dawn and sigh suggestively.
"Do you know who's making you do this?" asked Rize.
"We won't know until get to the final stop, outside of where we started," said Saki. The person overseeing our trip told us that it's a secret and she won't tell, so we have to respect that."
"All right."
The team finally finished breakfast and got ready to leave. Very few people were outside. "Can we see your sleigh?" asked Cocoa.
Saki, Nodoka and Shizuno looked at each other, nodded, and formed a girl sandwich, smooshing each other wish love, causing the employees to feel uneasy for a bit. The sleigh reappeared, and the boys returned to their human reindeer forms, going back to the spots and strapping themselves.
"So this is powered by humans dressed as reindeer?" asked Sharo.
"And magic," Nodoka said, the three girls dressed into their Santa outfits from before.
Sharo's eyes spiraled before she fell into Rize's cleavage, motorboating. "How...is that possible?" she muttered through her half-lidded eyes that were drunk with love.
"In a country like Japan, anything is possible," Shizu said. "Impossible is nothing. Thirst is everything. Obey your thirst. Sprite."
"I remembered seeing that campaign on YouTube," Cocoa said in a dreamlike state. The others looked at her with suspicious looks and sleazebag expressions.
"All right, well, good luck sending those presents and thanks for stopping by for breakfast," Rize said.
"We'll see you soon," Chiya added.
"Thanks for making Christmas awesome," added Chino.
"Merry Christmas," said Saki, Shizuno and Nodoka. "Bye-bye!"
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" replied the others as the sleigh took off.
"All right, well, let's see what our next mission will be," said Saki, loading up the monitor. "Wait a minute, this isn't Thouars."
"Good morning, Saki, Nodoka and Shizuno!" said Souji in her Tail Red twintail form.
"Souji?" Nodoka asked. "Where's Thouars?"
"She's sleeping with Kyoutarou," she replied. "Apparently, Kyoutarou gave in and made Thours his dakimakura or something, She was ravaged."
"Oh...my...did Teru beat him up?"
"No, apparently she joined in. Now he's stuck in a girl sandwich and they are all sleepy and won't wake up for a while. So that means I'm going to monitor your progress on the mission until about lunch, that's when Aika will take over, and then Thouars will send you home. Good?"
"Good!" they said.
"Your next mission, according to the list, is to go to Myoujou Academy and deliver gifts to the former members of the 10th Academy Class Black. Two of those members will get the best ones as they are the most important of the group. I will not say who they are, just drop the crate, like you always do. Can you do it?"
"Yes, we can!" they said.
"Good luck."
"This calls for a little Tohoshinki, what do you say?" asked Shizuno.
"I like that band," Saki said. "Really cute guys."
"Are you saying I'm not cute?" Nodoka snarked. "I'm your wife, you know?"
She pointed to the smug, flat-chested monkey girl. "Shizu. Play."
"Keep your head down U-Know time (Max)
You know what time it is?
This is return of the king
(Everything has ended) I didn't even start yet
(We broke up) I haven't even heard the reason yet
Everyone around me keeps asking me why I'm like this
Why are you like that, why are you like that? I'm already the bad guy
(If it's a sin) If loving you was a sin
(If that was a shin) If being genuine is a sin
(I'll keep it low, I'll keep it low) I'll hold it in and stand my ground
(Keep your head down)
You look pretty, but inside you're so different, that's what I'm afraid of
(Keep your head down)
I said I loved you but I'll let you go
(Why?) Did you leave me so easily
(Why?) Did I look easy to you?
(Why?) My heart is ripping to shreds
(Why?) If every moment was a dream
(Why?) If only I had the time to set it right
(Why?) I prayed for your happiness
I was always satisfied with having you
I was happy to dream the same dream as you no matter what they said
I had to let you go, but I'm just walking my path anyway
Now I'm just chillin', Feel like I'm healing
It's too late, you said you can't come back
You've always believed that I'd crumble without you
That's a misunderstanding, why would I do that? why, why, I told you I wouldn't
(Hey) I was really, really sad, because you were so immature
and I was afraid you'd meet someone bad (Why? baby)
(Keep your head down)
You're really pretty, but that's all there is to you, there's nothing important inside of you
(Keep your head down)
A nail is driven into the heart that is holding in the pain of love
Ha~ Don't play with people like that
In front of me, all you do is speak of lies
You're such a two-faced person
(Why why why) Since when did our crystal-like feelings become so opaque?
Our love has ended, I've let you go, and now my heart is empty
But my future is gesturing towards me to get up and smile
I'm letting you go, live happily (why why why)
One day far from now, far from now, I want to just smile comfortable
(Why?) Why
(Why?) You let go of our love so easily
(Why?) Did you ever think that someone would get worried?
(Why?) I don't think you know yet
(Why?) Exactly just what you let go of
(Why?) Just remain there and watch me grow
(Keep your head down)
Erased, disappeared, you've burned to death in my heart
(Keep your head down)
Erased, disappeared, you've died in my heart and you no longer exist."
"Really powerful song," Shizuno said, "when you think about it."
"How about this song?" asked Saki. With her mind, she brought up another piece.
"I wanna be your Superstar. oh my girl, listen
Staring eyes, Scorching flash
Summer sun, Lightning speed
Let me escort you, ah ah summer time love
Two people who met are starting a story?ok
We got shout like a eeey-oh! Kiss and dancing eeey-oh!
You are my girl girl, go burn, get down down
Cheer up boom boom, Live it up, Rush into falling in love
Dazzlingly blindingly shining Superstar Superstar Superstar Star
It's burning hot everyday but need to stop the global warming
Oh, I see. Let's cast off our clothes
Undisguisedly and freely
Wanna frolic around on the red carpet
We got shout like a eeey-oh! Kiss and dancing eeey-oh!
You are my girl girl, go burn, get down down
Cheer up boom boom, Live it up, Rush into falling in love
Dazzlingly blindingly shining Superstar Superstar Superstar Star
Summer is a mystery mystery always
I hold your everything everything in my arms
Sweetly, mystery mystery, Melting
So seeking everything everything of you
Come on kiss me my baby, pervading magic, run across the Galaxy (on fire)
We got shout like a eeey-oh! Kiss and dancing eeey-oh!
You are my girl girl, go burn, get down down
Cheer up boom boom, Live it up, Rush into falling in love
Dazzlingly blindingly shining Superstar Superstar Superstar Star
We got shout like a eeey-oh! Kiss and dancing eeey-oh!
You are my girl girl, go burn, get down down
Cheer up boom boom, Live it up, Rush into falling in love
Dazzlingly blindingly shining Superstar Superstar Superstar Star
wanna be your Superstar Superstar
oh baby you' re my Superstar
oh baby you' re my Superstar!"
"That is my type of music right there," Nodoka said. "I think an Irish group did an rendition of that. Or maybe it's the other way around."
"You start to wonder," said Saki. "We're almost there."
"Wooo hoo! Foe yay!" Shizuno roared.
"Do you even know what that is?"
"No?"
"Ugh..."
Tokaku Azuma and her partner, Haru Ichinose, were now forever entwined. The game of assassins had long been history, and Tokaku herself realized that it wasn't the game that draw her to Haru. It was true love in the deepest sense. They were now each other's best partner, they roomed together, they slept together, they went through the hell of college together. It was tough living the life of a freshman, but they were managing. Haru wasn't as sharp in her studies as Tokaku was, so Tokaku had to be the personal tutor,
But what disturbed Tokaku was that the other members of 10th Year Class Black never got in touch with her after graduation. They all went their separate ways and never got in touch. Not even Nio Hashiri, who was closest to the two of them, left a phone call or a message. Tokaku and Haru were each other's best company. But that would all change on Christmas Eve.
"I don't get why I have to come back here to this place," Tokaku said, looking at the Academy building, holding Haru's hand.
"But do you miss it?" she whispered.
"I missed trying to win the game and get my own wish."
"And if you had won?"
"I would have wished for you to come back to me if I had killed you, because I realized that I do love you."
A kiss. "I like that part of you, Tokaku. I don't want you to change."
A petting of her sweet-selling hair, redolent of strawberries. "I know. I know."
A voice. "Hey, did you miss us?" It was Nio, waving with the others, who had walked in, holding pieces of paper with writing.
"You guys!" Haru exclaimed. "I haven't seen you all in months!"
"We've been trying to get a hold of you," said Isuke Inukai. "The other way around. We couldn't get to you to see what you're doing."
"Yeah," said Kouko Kaminaga. "What she said. I last saw you handing me my bloody diploma and that was months ago. What have you been doing all this time?"
"College," Tokaku and Haru said.
"Is college tough for you guys?" asked Hitsugi Kirigaya.
"Not for me," Tokaku said.
"Struggling a little," Haru added.
"We were actually called to rendezvous here on this day at this time," said Shiena Kenmochi.
"Yeah, apparently, we were given these stupid leaflets," said Haruki Sagae, "and we were told to show up here or else."
"It was like some ultimatum on our lives our something," added Suzu Shutou, "and we had to come here."
"The place has definitely changed from before," said Otoya Takechi. "And for us, we've changed."
"We sure have," said Chitaru Namatame. "We're college students, office workers, construction workers, engineers, police officers, and Otoya here just got out on parole on a good behavior clause and has elected to work in the hairstyling industry instead. As for me...somehow I am able to finally realize my meaning in life, and it wasn't easy."
"Some of us took the hard way, some of us had it easier," said Sumireko Hanabusa. "Tokaku, Haru, I also found my partner as well."
"Sumi gives me confidence," said Mahiru Bamba. "I was able to finally fight my own fears and realize who I can become. We're gonna work together to make our dreams come true. I have reason to believe."
"Wonderful," Haru said. "Well done, everyone. Thank you for coming."
"So..." asked Nio, "...now what?" Tokaku pointed up with a flat gaze. Her jaw dropped. "Son of a...!"
A large crate slowly parachuted down. "There's a button here," said Haru, pressing it. The crate opened, showing a mountain of gift boxes.
"Oh my!" Haru exclaimed. "Christmas presents! How nice!"
"So that's what we came here for," said Haruki. "Let's see what's in my box. Oooh, a lifetime supply of Pocky! Oh yes! Jackpot!"
"A set of cooking books, videos, restaurant certificates and a Michelin guide, not bad," said Sumireko.
"Hey, I got the unreleased version of The Interview!" Nio said. "Yes! In your face, North Korea! My dog can rule better than that fatass in charge! I never liked you stupid idiots anyway! Oh yea!"
"Plenty of health supplements and videos," said Chitaru, opening her box. "Better safe than sorry."
"Let's see this, oh! It's an all-expenses paid trip to the Rio 2016 Olympics!" Suzu exclaimed. "I've always wanted to go one of these things! Now I get to run along the best beaches in Rio!"
"Congratulations," Tokaku said.
"And I got all the materials I need to start my own salon," added Otoya. The others, except for Tokaku and Haru, got clothes and jewelry as per request.
"Hey lovebirds," said Nio to Tokaku and Haru, nudging them, "you haven't opened your boxes. Hmmmm?"
"Oh yeah, we should do that," Haru said, giggling Madoka-style. "Go first, babe."
"Yep." Tokaku opened her box. "Whoa. A Homura Akemi magical girl uniform with hairband and red ribbon? A Mitakihara Middle School outfit with pantyhose and maryjanes? And an Akuma Homura uniform with wings, a bow, an earring, lipstick and no underwear!? Wow."
"Seriously!?" Nio roared, hyperventilating, steam coming out of her nostrils, furious and jealous. She was gasping for air. "No...underwear... Are you fucking serious!? If that's the case, if that's the case...then Haru...Haru...HARU...!"
"Calm down," Haru said, as she opened her box. "Whoa, a Madoka Kaname magical girl uniform with pink bows, striped underwear, shoes and a bow; a Mitakihara Middle School Uniform with white thighhighs and maryjames and red ribbons...and an Ultimate Madoka outfit with wings. And no underwear! Oh my..."
"AAAAAAAH, GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT FUCKING FAIR, JESUS!" Nio wailed to the skies in despair, running her fingers through her hair wildly. "Tokaku and Haru got the best gifts! This is because you two are truly a couple, aren't you!? Aren't you!?" Her head was towering over both of them for added effect. And steam was still coming out of her nostrils. She was persistent.
"Well, yeah?" Tokaku said, blinking.
She fell to her knees and whipped out her trademark blade. "I just wanna die..." But before Nio was about to stab herself, Suzu and Haruki stopped her and calmed her down by forming a girl sandwich. "Ahhhh, this world can be cruel to my own purity..."
"Implying you even have any," Tokaku snarked.
"Oh you, don't you ever change, you champ!"
"No present for the riddler of this crew?" asked Kaiba, emerging out of thin air and throwing dice before walking to the girls.
"Hmmm," Tokaku said, turning to the one box remaining. "Oh, here. Catch, sensei."
It was a big one. A big fish in a box, although it wasn't really a dead, frozen fish inside. "Whoa," said Kaiba. He opened the box and found...a pillow. "Wow. A dakimakura of Haru naked, lifesize. Mai...mai wai...fu?" He turned around and noticed that everyone but Tokaku and Haru were angry, with fiery auras to boot.
Haru had tears in her eyes and was about to lose it. "Kaiba...how can you be this lewd..." she sobbed. Tokaku had to give her a long kiss and they both consummated with her on top.
Meanwhile, Kaiba took a deep gulp. "Um, hi?" Seconds later...the perv was on the run. "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"
"You dirty, lewd, perverted riddling freak!" Nio screamed. "I'll kill you for turning Haru into your whore and messing with Tokaku's maiden heart!"
"I have a reason to use my scissors now," said Otoya, licking her lips before invoking the Bruce Buffer with the "don't argue." "Iiiiiiiit's tiiiiiiime!"
"I may not have assassinated Haru," said Isuke, "but god help me if I can't assassinate your ass right now on Christmas Eve, Kaiba!"
"Ore...maneater ni narimasu," Mahiru whispered, shades of Shinya coming back just in time for the holidays.
"Oh dear," said Tokaku, watching Kaiba get beaten up. "It's okay, it's over."
They both got up. Haru looked at the sleigh and Shizuno, Saki and Nodoka. "Thank you." she said through telekinesis. "Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas. Your future starts...now," said Nodoka with a smile.
Haru suddenly felt contractions. "Is something wrong?" Tokaku asked.
"Tokaku...everyone..." Haru was embarassed. "I think...I am pregnant." Everyone else stopped what they were doing and fell over in shock.
"WHAT!" the others on the ground exclaimed.
"Let me die, let me die, please, Santa Maria de Jesus, quiero morir!" Nio bawled while rocking on her knees, having to be sandwiched again to prevent a comedic tragedy.
"And," Haru whispered before kissing who would eventually be more than a partner, "you, Tokaku, are the father." All of a sudden, Tokaku blacked out and fainted. "W...was it something I said, love?"
"Okay guys, I think we can get the hell out of here already," Shizuno squeaked, already embarassed. "Hyaaaaa!" Embarassed, Shizu cracked the whip and the sleigh rolled out, leaving Haru to pick up the pieces while the others lay in total shock.
"What the hell was that?" Shizuno said, clearly in pure disbelief. "There's too much yuri in Japan, it gets me feeling too excite!" She felt an embrace. "Eh?" Suddenly, Shizu was on top of Nodoka, her breasts on Shizu's head as she steered the sleigh.
"Calm?" Nodoka asked, petting Shizuno, causing her to let out a release.
"Mah woman," she said in a deep, manly voice reminiscent of a transient from Mississippi. "Make that, not enough."
"Just let me drive," Nodoka said. "Saki, take the next mission."
"Okay, uh Souji, are you there?" asked Saki on the big virtual board.
"Good job sending those presents," Souji said, clapping her hands.
"Yeah, now, what's our next mission?"
"Looking at this, your next mission is to deliver a crate of presents to Raku Ichijou's house. He's brought all of his friends and all of his women to the house for a Christmas Party. And it will result in some really kinky stuff going on but you already have an idea."
"We know," they all said.
"You do?" asked Souji.
"We're lesbians. We do kinkiness in our sleep. Literally," Nodoka said smugly.
"Thanks for telling me, I thought you were unassuming Mormons in disguise."
"What's a Mormon?" asked Shizu.
"Another name for a moron, but this is an opinion and not fact. Use a grain of salt, get it."
"I could use salt right...now..."
"Here," Saki said, giving Shizuno a bag of onion rings. In one fall swoop, she scarfed the whole thing down without even chewing. "Warrior."
"Anyway, the coordinates are here. It shouldn't be too far," Souji said. "Good luck!"
"You should chew before you swallow," Nodoka said.
"My flat chest and my metabolism allows me to swallow whole bags of salty snacks easily as if it was paper going through a shredder," Shizuno retorted. "True story, no lie, no gimmicks."
"Full power, 24 hour, no ticket, no shower," said Saki. "I'm starting to finally know where to go for once. Hey Shizu, wanna choose a song?"
Her eyes were aflame, the Shizu's. "Here it is."
"Dry lightning cracks across the skies
Those storm clouds gather in her eyes
Her daddy was a mean old mister
Mama was an angel in the ground
The weather man called for a twister
She prayed blow it down
There's not enough rain in Oklahoma
To wash the sins out of that house
There's not enough wind in Oklahoma
To rip the nails out of the past
Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away,
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away
'Til there's nothing left standing, nothing left of yesterday
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away,
Blown away
She heard those sirens screaming out
Her daddy laid there passed out on the couch
She locked herself in the cellar
Listened to the screaming of the wind
Some people call it taking shelter
She called it sweet revenge
Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away,
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away
'Til there's nothing left standing, nothing left of yesterday
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away,
Blown away
There's not enough rain in Oklahoma
To wash the sins out of that house
There's not enough wind in Oklahoma
To rip the nails out of the past
Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away (blown away)
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away (blown away)
'Til there's nothing left standing, nothing left of yesterday (blown away)
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away,
Blown away, blown away, blown away, blown away, blown away..."
"Are you sure you can do the cooking, Haru?" asked Raku Ichijou to Haru Onodera as she began to prepare some of the cakes and pies for the guests at the Ichijou household.
"Just leave it to me," she said. "I was able to memorize every recipe in the book Big Sis gave me six months ago and now I can do it myself."
As for Raku, he was setting up the decorations and installing two turnables and a microphone for his longtime buddy Shu Maiko to test his DJing skills. Rumor had it that the two rival gangs were enjoying their good terms with each other and consipired to discreetly pilfer some records including some dubstep, mainstream pop from America and rock from Latin America, in addition to trance music from Europe.
"Yo, Raku," Shu said, walking in. "I see Haru is cooking dessert already. Are we preparing dinner early?"
"It does take time," he concurred.
"Where's Chitoge, Kosaki, Seishirou, Ruri and Marika?"
"Strip poker."
"Whoa, can I take a look."
Haru went over to him. "If you even dare to mess with Big Sis's internal affairs, I will ask you to leave!"
"Um, Haru, this is MY house," Raku deadpanned.
"I know that, but...privacy..." she said, blushing.
"Anyway, I wanted to go ahead and test this DJ set that was sent to me by this guy from Sweden." Shu said, walking over and turning the two turntables and a microphone on. Actuallly, it was a computer that had a list of songs pilfered illegally by the two gangs.
"What's the guy's name?"
"His name is Tim, but allegedly he is known by the Italian-sounding name Avicii."
"T...TIM BERGLING? AVICII!?" Haru exclaimed. "I was at one of his concerts a few months ago! Oh my god! You have connections with him? That's so cool."
"Yep. And this set has all of his music."
"Well, that's news to me," Raku concurred. Meanwhile, at the sleigh, Shizuno was indeed playing an Avicii song that was already on that set.
"Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can't tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start
They tell me I'm too young to understand
They say I'm caught up in a dream
Well life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes
Well that's fine by me
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn't know I was lost
I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
Hope I get the chance to travel the world
But I don't have any plans
Wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life's a game made for everyone
And love is the prize
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn't know I was lost
Didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know (didn't know, didn't know)..."
Ruri Miyamoto opened her eyes after falling into a trance while playing strip poker. She was the only one who still had her underwear on. "I sense something," she said.
"What do you sense?" asked Marika Tachibana, looking at her hand.
"Stay here, you can continue playing, I need to come downstairs." They were all in Raku's bedroom.
"Be quick," Kosaki Onodera said.
"Nah, let her take her time," Chitoge Kirisaki said. "We got all the time in the world."
"Uh guys, this isn't fun," Seishirou Tsugumi said, her entire body blushing like a camellia. She was the only one naked among the others playing. "This is no fun at all."
"Oy, Ruri, where are you going?" asked Raku, as Ruri quickly walked out, an overcoat and slippers covering her lacy underwear.
"Raku. Follow me."
"Something going on?" asked Shu, testing the sound with some bass beats.
"What is it, Ruri?" Raku asked her.
"There is a crate with a button," Ruri said. "Shall I press it?" He nodded. The crate opened to reveal another mountain of gift boxes.
"Christmas presents?"
"Presents!?" Haru exclaimed. She lowered the heat on the hotpot and pies to the minimum before heading upstairs. "Uh, Big Sis, Chitoge, Marika, Seishirou, there's some presents outside the door!"
"Ooooh, let's go!" Chitoge said as they all put on their pajamas and rushed out to take a look. They noticed that a sleigh was hovering over them.
"Santa does exist..." said Seishirou, fainting.
"So the legend is true after all," Marika concluded, stroking her chin in thought.
Kosaki had a closer look, "It looks like there are skaters powering the sleigh, and that there are three girls driving it..."
"Oh my," Chitoge said as the others waved. "Hey you guys up there! Merry Christmas! Thank you!"
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good life!" Shizuno then flashed a salute and pointed to the human reindeer, and the sleigh took off.
"Didn't she mean night?" Ruri asked Chitoge as the others brought the gifts inside.
A flat gaze. "I can assure you...it was deliberate."
"All right, another mission down," Saki said to the others as the sleigh continued to roll.
"What's the next one?" asked Nodoka to Souji.
"Your mission," Souji said, with a giggle, "is to head to Yuuta Togashi's house to send another batch of present to him, his future wife Rikka Takanashi, and their close friends who will be having a Christmas party which watching plenty of 'masculine magic manipulating sessions in cold, damp air,' known in plebians' terms as 'football games.'"
"Oh, the Chuunibyou crew," Shizuno snarked. "The crazy people that make crazy look saner than insanity."
"Huh?" Saki asked, tilting her head.
"Oh, whatever, let's do this!" A tap and a whip crack later, "LEEEROOOOOOOY JEEEEEEKIIIIIIINS!"
"In the words of Kyubey, I don't get it," Saki said as the sleigh raced towards the Togashi house. "Nodoka, wanna pick a song?"
"How about another one from Avicii?" A flock of birds and jets accompanied the sleigh as it flew across the Eastern skies.
"Hey, once upon a younger year
When all our shadows disappeared
The animals inside came out to play
Hey, went face to face with all our fears
Learned our lessons through the tears
Made memories we knew would never fade
One day my father—he told me,
"Son, don't let it slip away."
He took me in his arms, I heard him say,
"When you get older
Your wild heart will live for younger days
Think of me if ever you're afraid."
He said, "One day you'll leave this world behind
So live a life you will remember."
My father told me when I was just a child
These are the nights that never die
My father told me
When thunder clouds start pouring down
Light a fire they can't put out
Carve your name into those shining stars
He said, "Go venture far beyond these shores.
Don't forsake this life of yours.
I'll guide you home no matter where you are."
One day my father—he told me,
"Son, don't let it slip away."
When I was just a kid I heard him say,
"When you get older
Your wild heart will live for younger days
Think of me if ever you're afraid."
He said, "One day you'll leave this world behind
So live a life you will remember."
My father told me when I was just a child
These are the nights that never die
My father told me
These are the nights that never die
My father told me
Hey, hey!
My father told me..."
"I think what we'll do is make three more stops," Shizuno said, "then we'll have lunch."
"I love how our human reindeer move like one unit, as if the sky was made of ice," Saki said.
"Really cool team," Nodoka said. "Ah, I know the song that goes great with this."
"Hey brother! There's an endless road to rediscover
Hey sister! Know the water's sweet but blood is thicker
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
Hey brother! Do you still believe in one another?
Hey sister! Do you still believe in love? I wonder
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
What if I'm far from home?
Oh brother, I will hear you call!
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister, I will help you hang on!
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
Hey brother! There's an endless road to rediscover
Hey sister! Do you still believe in love? I wonder
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
What if I'm far from home?
Oh brother, I will hear you call!
What if I lose it all?
Oh sister, I will help you hang on!
Oh, if the sky comes falling down, for you
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do."
"When it comes to cooking dinner for a Christian turned secular festival like Christmas," Rikka said, striking a pose with her eyepatch before her brave attempt at a fondue, "no one does it better."
"Just be quiet and cook," Yuuta said, testing the flavor of a soup he was making before decided to add a few more herbs for added effect. "Balance."
"Jeez, Yuuta, you can't let your wife be spontaneous for once?"
"A good wife never makes a scene when doing something serious."
"You know, Yuuta," said Shinka, moving some objects over to make space in the living room, "you need to have some fun in your life. It is the holiday season, you know."
"Is anybody heading out of town for the New Year?" Sanae Dekomori asked the others. "I'm planning to celebrate the new year in MItakihara with a few friends of mine."
"Academy City for me," said Kumin Tsuyuri. "Massive all-night concert with some rock bands from Korea coming in to town."
"Amateurs," said Satone Shichimiya. "I am heading out to America to watch the Rose Parade and the Rose Bowl Game."
"You watch American football?" asked Shinka to her.
"It's a great sport. Really fun to watch."
"But some of those people have turned into demons, especially the black people," Rikka said.
"Rikka, you shouldn't be a xenophobe."
"No, but it's true. The forces of evil have corrupted their minds." A pause. "They have turned into wifebeaters, ladykillers, adulterers, drug dealers, and some have been martyred on the street by other unsavory black men, and the Southern region of America is a wasteland in terms of purity and respect because of those heartless demons who play a joke of a sport called American football by day, and lose the game against the forces of justice by night, never to be awakened ever again...in prison."
Yuuta gave Rikka a headbump. "If you were to say it to those athletes who are making millions of dollars, you would not be able to live to tell about it.
"I was just being honest.
"No, you are poking the bear."
"Is it made of sugar?" Yuuta was shaking her incessantly. "Ahhhhh, Yuuutaaaaaa!"
"Stop it, stop it, you! You're supposed to be cooking here!"
"Do you want me to take over for her?" Shinka asked. A few seconds later, back to normal. "Oh."
"Oh?" Satone noticed a glow outside. "Something's outside."
"Can I stop cooking for a bit to see, Yuuta?" asked Rikka.
"Yeah, go ahead. Actually, keep the heat very low." After she did that, Rikka and the others went out to take a look. "Let's see what this is."
"A crate?" Sanae asked. "Hey, what is a crate doing outside Yuuta's house?"
Rikka was in shock. "There is a button. ! This must be a bomb!"
"A BOMB!?" they all exclaimed.
"Waaaaaah," Satone cried before falling over a few steps later. "I hurt myself."
"Someone doesn't like us..." Yuuta was about to press the button. "DO NOT PRESS IT, YUUTA!"
"Why?" he asked.
A dramatic voice, with flower petals flowing down. "If you do...we're all going to die...and I will not forgive you in the afterlife."
"It's not a bomb, Rikka!"
"Hey guys," Nodoka said from the sleigh. "You can press the button!"
"So it isn't a bomb," Rikka said. The others sighed. But before Yuuta could push... "It's a bomb set up by the terrorists in the sleigh."
"WHAT!?" they all exclaimed, from the people in the sky to the ones on the ground.
"I knew the Islamic State was going to do us all in, and they weren't kidding. It's over." She went over to Yuuta and embraced him, the tears falling out of her eyes. "Just press it. Let's suffer together."
"Rikka.." Yuuta whispered.
"Yuuta, I love you!" she cried, sobbing.
"Tch." He punched the button, knowing that Rikka was being seriously overdramatic. The crate opened to reveal gift boxed.
"I...I'm still alive?" Rikka asked, blinking. "And...presents?"
"Hey, three of you," Souji said over the monitor at the sleigh, "you can drop down for bit to assure here that we're not who she thinks we are."
"Okay," Nodoka said. A button press, and the sleing dropped down to just five meters over the ground.
"Still think my wife is a terrorist...Rikka Takanashi?" asked Saki with a smile.
Rikka took a close look. "You're not a terrorist...you...are the Santa Nodocchi!"
"What?" the others except the ones of the sleigh said. The human reindeer were stuck in a Green Leaves pose.
"This," Rikka said, pointing to a blushing Nodoka, "is the Santa Nodocchi. According to the oracles of my sister, she is the reincarnation of a goddess born to save Japan from the forces of tyranny coming from Tokyo!"
"I don't get it," Yuuta said.
"She is here to spread happiness and smiles across the country, and then she will advocate for changes to the way Japan views its neighbors. It will do what the Koreans ask, work with the Chinese, destroy the North Korean Kim dynasty, lay waste to the Yasukuni Shrine, make corrections to the textbooks regarding our nation's history, and altogether draw out the super-awesome power of East Asian Strength. She, the Santa Nodocchi, is our savior."
"I'm just a mahjong player," Nodoka said, waving it off.
"And she plays mahjong, dear brothers and sister," Rikka said. "She will make mahjong the official state-sanctioned sport of the country instead of baseball."
"Huh?" Sanae exclaimed. "Is that true?"
"Well," Nodoka said, "I do want everything to learn how to play it..."
"See?" Rikka shouted. "The Santa Nodocchi speaks the truth, for she is the Angel of Angels determined to save Japan!" Rikka fell to her knees and prayed, her face looking up through her tears. "O Santa Nodocchi, thank you for giving me the strength to come to terms with the passing of my father. Through your intercessions, I am able to harness his spirit in me until I finally see him again in the afterlife. He told me in a dream to find a husband and start a family, and thanks to your help, I have been able to put my best foot forward. Thank you, Santa Nodocchi, for bringing so much joy in my life. I am forever in your debt."
Rikka was close enough to the sled that Nodoka went over and touched her forehead, making a sign of the cross. "You are welcome, Rikka. Be filled with the wishes and goodwill of those whose lives I have touched. You may rise."
"Is Nodoka your real name?" Satone asked.
"Yes," she said.
"You're from that show, right?" she asked. "Saki The Player, is that what it's called?"
"I think that's the name. We just call it Saki."
"And I am the star of the show," Saki said. "Saki MIyanaga. She's Nodoka Haramura."
"And I am Shizuno Takakamo," Shizu said.
"Ah, the monkey girl," Rikka replied.
"Urghk!"
"That's enough dramatics," Yuuta said, bopping Rikka's head. "Anyway, thanks for the presents."
"Yeah, thanks for the girls, you guys," Shinka added.
"I wonder what I got," Kumin said.
"I suggest you wait until midnight to find out, but you won't be penalized if you open it early," Nodoka said.
"Nah, I'll open mine's at midnight," Sanae said. "Gotta keep up with tradition."
"Thank you," Yuuta said. "See you later, and Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas!" they all said to each other as the sleigh took off.
"And the fact that men are used to power a sleigh like that...it is a remarkable advancement in technology that only the Santa Nodocchi could come up with!" Rikka added as the others went back inside with their gifts.
"Get inside and get back to cooking," Yuuta snarked, dragging Rikka back in by the ear while she had her gift in hand.
"Ah, Yuuuuutaaaaaaa!"
"Oh my, another mission complete, baby!" Shizu said. "Yeah baby!"
Nodoka was stroking Etopen while Saki was steering. "So that was Chuunibyou in a nutshell, huh?"
"What's the next mission, Souji?" asked Saki to Souji.
"Your next mission is to head to Shidou Itsuka's house in Tenguu City to drop the next batch of Christmas presents," she said. "One of the recipients is an important person, as she is the designated Saimoe Leader of the Free World, and so all the gifts in her party will include something extra special."
"Saimoe Leader Of The Free World?" Nodoka said.
"Yes," she replied. "That's a very important position in terms of the big picture, so get there right now."
"Let's do it!" Shizuno said, pressing a button and cracking the whip. On cue, a Neil Young song played.
"There's colors on the street
Red, white and blue
People shufflin' their feet
People sleepin' in their shoes
But there's a warnin' sign
on the road ahead
There's a lot of people sayin'
we'd be better off dead
Don't feel like Satan,
but I am to them
So I try to forget it,
any way I can.
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world.
I see a woman in the night
With a baby in her hand
Under an old street light
Near a garbage can
Now she puts the kid away,
and she's gone to get a hit
She hates her life,
and what she's done to it
There's one more kid
that will never go to school
Never get to fall in love,
never get to be cool.
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world.
We got a thousand points of light
For the homeless man
We got a kinder, gentler,
Machine gun hand
We got department stores
and toilet paper
Got styrofoam boxes
for the ozone layer
Got a man of the people,
says keep hope alive
Got fuel to burn,
got roads to drive.
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world
Keep on rockin' in the free world,
Keep on rockin' in the free world."
"52 kilometers to Tenguu City," said Shizuno, "according to the GPS. Look at all that farmland and mountains." She whipped out some aviator sunglasses, and the others also wore theirs as well. "Sun's pretty bright today."
"Hope I don't get a tan," Nodoka said. "Oh, I haven't tanned yet."
"According the label on this fabric," Saki said, "this prevents your skin from tanning while being out in the sun."
"All right!" said Shizuno. "I wanna pick another song. How about U2?"
"Us?" Nodoka asked.
"No, I'm talking about that band."
"We were had," they both said in a disappointing tone.
"Every breaking wave on the shore
Tells the next one there'll be one more
And every gambler knows that to lose
Is what you're really there for
Summer I was fearless
Now I speak into the answer phone
Like every falling leaf on the breeze
Winter wouldn't leave it alone
Alone
If you go?
If you go your way and I go mine
Are we so?
Are we so helpless against the tide?
Baby every dog on the street
Knows that we're in love with defeat
Are we ready to be swept off our feet
And stop chasing
Every breaking wave
Every sailor knows that the sea
Is a friend made enemy
And every shipwrecked soul, knows what it is
To live without intimacy
I thought I heard the captain's voice
But it's hard to listen while you preach
Like every broken wave on the shore
This is as far as I could reach
If you go?
If you go your way and I go mine
Are we so?
Are we so helpless against the tide?
Baby every dog on the street
Knows that we're in love with defeat
Are we ready to be swept off our feet
And stop chasing
Every breaking wave
The sea knows where are the rocks
And drowning is no sin
You know where my heart is
The same place that yours has been
We know that we fear to win
And so we end before we begin
Before we begin
If you go?
If you go your way and I go mine
Are we so?
Are we so helpless against the tide?
Baby every dog on the street
Knows that we're in love with defeat
Are we ready to be swept off our feet
And stop chasing
Every breaking wave?"
The legacy of Ratatoskr was known by many people within the Japan Self Defense Forces by this time that an agreement initiated by the Government of Japan allowed the governement and the JSDF to recognize the organization as a ally in the ongoing war against terror. It was a partnership that resulted in Kotori Itsuka, the commander of the Ratatoskr-owned airship Fraxinus, to receive awards across Japan and Asia for her advocacy in fighting global conflict through peaceful, constructive means while using self-defense to protect Japan. However, since Itsuka was named the Saimoe Leader of the Free World months earlier, she had been forced to temporarily delegate her position as commander to Kyouhei Kannazuki until she was not reelected to the position for the 2016 cycle.
The good thing for Kotori was that she did not need to move to New York City yet to do her work in advocating the Saimoe movement until January 1, 2015, when her term began. So, as Leader-elect, she chose to go on holiday and have a Christmas sleepover with Shidou, Tohka Yatogami, Origami Tobiichi, Yoshino, Kurumi Tokisaki and even Miku Izayoi, who insisted of coming, primarily to idly play FIFA 15 on the XBox One and stuff her face with KFC.
"Do I have to carry all of this?" Shidou asked, annoyed as they all went inside the house to unload and prepare for the party.
"Yes, because you," Kotori said, "are the man of the house."
"That's what she said," Origami added. "You should know how to treat women right."
"All these food and snacks," Yoshino said. "Are we going to be able to finish them all?" For the first time, Yoshino learned to speak without help from her puppet.
"If we can't finish our share," Kurumi said, "I say we fatten Shidou up before the real fun begins tonight."
"Whoa, slow down there, Kurumi," Shidou said. "We just got back from the mall, you know.
"I know you know how to sing, but can you cook, Miku?" Kotori asked, pulling the ingredients out while the others set up the room.
"I'll give our dinner a voice, because it will do anything for love," she sang, "but it won't do that."
"Do what?" the others asked.
"Not get eaten by us." The others went off to take care of their business in the house, leaving Miku to do the cooking, "You haven't heard of Meat Loaf? Oh you guys..."
20 minutes later, while the others weren't watching, the sleigh closed in on the house. "This must be it," Shizu said. "Tenguu City."
"Time to deploy the presents," Nodoka said, pressing a button. A tap later, a large crate parachuted down.
Yoshino's puppet, Yoshinon, also known as Zadkiel but better known as Yoshinon, glowed a little, and spoke. "Hey guys, we better stop what we're doing and head outside," said Yoshinon. "Right now!"
"What's going on?" asked Shidou.
"There might be something outside," Tohka said.
"Interesting," Kurumi mused.
"It better not be another Spirit raising hell on my watch," Kotori snarled. They all left the house and saw the crate. "Oh, it's just a crate."
"With a button," Shidou added. "Pushing." He pressed the button and the crate opened to reveal a mountain of gift boxes.
"Christmas presents," Miki said, "Yes! Santa is here!"
"Men towing a sleigh controlled by women," Yoshinon noticed. "Somehow I have seen everything this month."
"Guess we can open the presents or at least see what's inside," Origami said.
"Let's take a look at my box," Kotori said with a grin. "Each of us has two boxes. Oh my, everything on my wish list...and a lifetime supply of Chupa Chups! Santa truly exists!"
"Uh, Kotori, we also received Chupa Chups," said Shidou. "And there's gifts for the Yamai sisters."
"Hey, there is something else inside the lollipop box," Tohka added.
"What is it?"
"OOOOOOOOH! It's a all-expenses paid trip to New York City to celebrate New Year's Eve!" Miku exclaimed.
"Are you serious?" said the others.
"I've always wanted to go to New York City and sing Auld Lang Syne down there while being drunk!"
"Um, we're not of legal drinking age yet," Shidou said.
"But underage drinking is common! It's the New Year, darling!"
"The law is the law, though." He turned to Kotori, who had a fiery aura. "Uh, Kotori?"
"Somehow the person who gave us this trip to New York knew that I have business there next year." She looked up at the sleigh. "All right, which one of you Santa knockoffs figured out I was the Saimoe Leader of the Free World next year huh!?"
"You're the Saimoe Leader of the Free World?" asked Shizuno, Saki and Nodoka.
"You...don't know?"
A screen popped up in front of Kotori, Shidou and the others. "That would be me."
"Huh?" Shidou asked. "There are two Kotoris."
"Oh my," said Souji. "Twintails. Red twintails! I wish I could touch them and experience your awesome power! Twintails make the world go round!"
"Hold the phone," Kotori said. "While I appreciate your compliments for my hairstyle, who the hell are you!?"
"Me." Souji giggled. "My name is Tail Red, and I also have red twintails. I'm also a hero like you are. And I am also awesome and sexy and cute like you. I love girls with twintails."
"Well I'm Kotori Itsuka, the de factor commander of the Fraxinus and the 2015 Saimoe Leader of the Free World. I've accomplished far more than you, I'm better than you and I even have a bigger chest than you." She stick her tongue out, closing an eye.
"Heheheheh...in that case..." Souji reverted back to his normal self. "My real name is Souji Mitsuka and I'm actually a guy," he deadpanned. "My last name sounds like yours, but it includes an M because I am really a man."
"Is that so..." Kotori immediately fainted, her eyes empted. "Ahahahahahahahah," she laughed faintly. An angelic sigh and a release later she fell into a deep sleep, in love with defeat, chasing another breaking wave. U2 called it all along.
Shidou shook his head and immediately princess-carried the sleeping Kotori. "Hey, thanks for the presents and the trip to New York," he said to the three of them. "Merry Christmas from Ratatoskr!"
"Merry Christmas!" said the rest of Shidou's women, which grabbed their presents before walking back into the house.
"Oh, why me..." Kotori murmured. Miku grabbed a Chupa Chups from Kotori's box and put it into Kotori's mouth as an impromptu pacifier. "Uguuuu..." And on cue, her ribbons turned white and her wavy mouth began to drool.
"Merry Christmas," Nodoka said. She pointed to the reindeer, and just like that, they took off.
"What's our next mission?" asked Shizuno to Souji on the intercom as the sleigh got rolling.
"Your next mission is to head to an island community 300 km away called Itogami City and deliver presents to seven people at the residence of Kojou Akatsuki. Unlike the last few times, they have been asked by the organizers of this mission in advance to await your arrival so that you can immediately head to your lunchtime location in Academy City."
"Wow, two cool towns in one," Shizuno said. "Oh yeah. And..." A growl. "My stomach could use some food."
"Let's get going," Nodoka said. "I have a feeling that there may be some kinky stuff going on there, too."
"Come on, Nodoka-chan," Shizu said, "you live for that stuff."
"Don't say that out in the open, Shizuno!" Nodoka exclaimed, blushing wildly. "Tch!" Soon, another song played as she cracked the whip. A flock of angels accompanied then, flying and dancing to the Tove Lo melody.
"I eat my dinner in my bathtub
Then I go to sex clubs
Watching freaky people gettin' it on
It doesn't make me nervous
If anything I'm restless
Yeah, I've been around and I've seen it all
I get home, I got the munchies
Binge on all my Twinkies
Throw up in the tub
Then I go to sleep
And I drank up all my money
Dazed and kinda lonely
You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Pick up daddies at the playground
How I spend my day time
Loosen up the frown,
Make them feel alive
Oh, make it fast and greasy
I'm numb and way too easy
You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Staying in my play pretend
Where the fun ain't got no end
Ooh
Can't go home alone again
Need someone to numb the pain
Ooh
Staying in my play pretend
Where the fun ain't got no end
Ooh
Can't go home alone again
Need someone to numb the pain
You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh..."
"That music turned you on, didn't it, Nodoka-chan?" said Shizuno.
"It would turn anybody on because it's a song about sex, duh!"
"My, oh my," Saki said through her wavy mouth. After shaking her head, she was back to her senses. "Can I choose a song now?"
"Yeah, go ahead," Shizu said, pointing to Saki.
"Ehhh, ummmmm, how about...this?" A backbeat. The bass. And soon, visuals of moonwalking flashmobs from around the world were in sync with the music. Wacko. To the Jacko.
"She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene
I said don't mind, but what do you mean, I am the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round
She said I am the one, who will dance on the floor in the round
She told me her name was Billie Jean, as she caused a scene
Then every head turned with eyes that dreamed of being the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round
People always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young girls' hearts
And mother always told me be careful of who you love
And be careful of what you do 'cause the lie becomes the truth
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
For forty days and forty nights
The law was on her side
But who can stand when she's in demand
Her schemes and plans
'Cause we danced on the floor in the round
So take my strong advice, just remember to always think twice
(Don't think twice, don't think twice)
She told my baby we'd danced till three, then she looked at me
Then showed a photo my baby cried his eyes were like mine (oh, no!)
'Cause we danced on the floor in the round, baby
People always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young girls' hearts
She came and stood right by me
Just the smell of sweet perfume
This happened much too soon
She called me to her room
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
She says I am the one,
(you know what you did, (she says he is my son)breaking my heart babe)
She says I am the one
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover (don't Billie Jean)
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover..."
Kojou Akatsuki had one heck on an orgy the previous evening, as Yukina Himaragi, Asagi Aiba, Kanon Kanase, La Folia Rihavein, Sayaka Kirasaka and Yuuma Tokoyogi all consummated with him at his home, resulting in a lot of adult noisemaking, a lot of love flowing out, and a lot of passion shared. Kojou's sister, Nagisa, was in the other room and she never heard the noises because she asleep, perhaps having visions of relations with a boy of her own, hand holding and all that. But she felt the heat, and was masturbating all night.
The morning came, and while all of Kojou's harem were still sleeping naked with no clothes on and his manhood was still harder than a rock, Nagisa woke up and proceeded to idly play on her newly-purchases PS4 to play FIFA 15. Her team: the Los Angeles Galaxy. The reason, she thought they were the only good team in MLS, although Seattle was more popular.
"Okay, so Mr. Twellmen said to press L1-triangle over the top for the goal," Nagisa said. "Here it goes." A few presses. "Oooooh, GOOOOOOOAL!" She paused the game, ran around, and shouted. "GOOOOOOOOAL!" Of course, she was also in her yellow underwear with cat ears and a tail. Sensing something, she went downstairs and peered through the window. A crate gently landing down.
Nagisa quickly went up the stairs and opened Kojou's bedroom door then did a football-style celebration slide with a cat paws pose right into Yukina. "GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAL!" she exclaimed.
The girls groaned. "Oy, Yukina, we're trying to sleep, you know," Kojou said.
"Heheh." She did a cat pose, sticking her tongue out. "There's a crate waiting for you, big brother."
"There's a crate waiting outside?" exclaimed the others, waking up instantly.
Kojou cracked his knuckles and flashed his fangs in a menacing smile. "It's here. Get dressed."
"Ohhh man," Yukina sighed, putting on her underwear, shirt, skirt and sweater. "I feel like a train ran me over."
"I feel drunk," Sayaka said. "I still feel drunk."
"That was the best night of sex ever, Kojou," Asagi added. "You rock."
"Nagisa, you should get dressed too," Kojou said, putting his clothes on.
"Okay!" And she was off.
"I wonder what presents we're getting?" asked Kanon Kanase as the girls and Kojou walked outside the house.
"Here's the crate," Kojou said.
"Whoa, a button," said Nagisa. She pressed it. The crate opened, revealing gift boxes.
"Christmas is officially here," Sayaka said. "Dig in."
"This is fantastic," said La Folia. "I got what I wanted for my Christmas list."
"I got basketball jerseys of all the teams in the NBA," said Yuuma. "And a basketball. And all-expenses paid tickets for the Final Four in America next year. I wonder if I'll have time to even go..."
"I got new clothes!" exclaimed Asagi. "And jewelry! And perfume! And a two-week vacation to the South of France!"
"Wow," said Kojou. "Congratulations."
As the others picked up their gifts, Nagisa turned to Sayaka, "Hey Sayaka."
"What?"
"Let's settle our differences the right way."
"How?"
She whipped out a controller and tossed it over to her. "I challenge you to a game of FIFA 15!"
Sayaka smiled. "You're on." A fist bump and five minutes later, they were playing while the others were busy preparing for the party later that night.
Kojou nodded at the team before going back in. "Good work! Happy Holidays."
Yukina looked up and flashed a thumbs-up. "Thanks for the gifts! Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas, everyone," Shizuno said before pointing to the human reindeer and the sleigh took off.
"It's lunchtime," said Aika, who was now at the monitor.
"Aika-san!" Shizuno said. "Hello. Did you have a good sleep?"
"Good rest. I am starting to learn how to play mahjong and was able to call riichi a few times and learn the terminology. It's like poker."
"Great. Nice to see you're learning," said Nodoka.
"Lunchtime will be in Academy City at a restaurant called Joseph's. Here, there will be a party waiting for you, and after you eat, you will need to give out some presents to some people. To facilitate things, the human reindeer will assist with distribution."
"All right!" Shizuno exclaimed. "Lunchtime, baby! Wooooooo! Let's step on it, boys!"
A crack of the whip. "YEEEEEEAAAAAAH!" the human reindeer roared, and the team raced towards the world-famous Academy City.
"So what song should we play?" Saki asked.
Nodoka snapped her fingers. "This."
"If I told you, that this couldn't get better babe
And your heartbeat, it lets me know you feel the same.
I can hold you, keep you safe until you fall asleep.
Never worried, cause I can give you what you need.
Now everything I do, is all for loving you.
Its not something that we're used to.
No other way to say, I need you every day.
And now I'm gonna change my ways.
And it's a part of you, I never wanna lose.
I'll do anything you want me to.
Like any other day, I know I'll find a way-aa-aay.
And if ever I'm alone you'll say.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
In a moment, I know that everything could change.
And I know that, my life would never be the same.
You're the only one that's making sense to me.
When I close my eyes, You're the one, I see.
There's no other way I could ever be...Without you babe.
Now everything I do, Is all for loving you.
Its not something that we're used to.
No other way to say, I need you everyday.
And now I'm gonna change my ways.
And it's a part of you, I never wanna lose.
I'll do anything you want me to.
Like any other day, I know I'll find a way-aa-aay.
And if ever I'm alone you'll say.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you.
I'll be thinking about you."
"Nice song," Shizuno said as the number concluded. "I love Calvin Harris."
"That's a great song, too," Saki said. "Well, it looks like we're halfway there the rate we're going, so how about another song? Man, our reindeer are straining to get to Joseph's, wherever that is."
"Hmm, how about this?" asked Nodoka.
"Let's go!
Make no excuses now
I'm talking here and now
I'm talking here and now
Let's go!
Your time is running out
Let's go!
I'm talking here and now
I'm talking here and now
It's not about what you've done
It's about what you doing
It's all about where you going
No matter where you've been
Let's go!
Let's go!
Let's go!, Let's go!, Let's go!...
There ain't no better time
I'm talking here and now
I'm talking here and now
Let's go!
Right now is where you shine
I'm talking here and now
I'm talking here and now
It's not about what you've done
It's about what you doing
It's all about where you going
No matter where you've been
Let's go!
Let's go!
Let's go!, Let's go!, Let's go!...
Let's make it happen
Ooh, Let's make it happen tonight
Let's make it happen
Ooh, Let's make it happen tonight
Let's make it happen
Ooh, Let's make it happen tonight
Let's make it happen
Ooh, Let's make it happen tonight
Let's go!"
After that song, the drop beat, synth drums, squeaks and claps of "Awooga" were playing as the sleigh eased into the outskirts of the Academy City in Tokyo. The human reindeer were programmed to know the coordinates of Joseph's, but they slowed down to allow the three girls to savor the sights of the city so that by the time the song ended, they touched down at the parking lot of restaurant. Two long lines of traditional dancers and drummers from around the world on either side were dancing and drumming in sync to the melody, welcoming the team as it arrived. Some members of the press were on hand, as well, and police had to divert traffic.
"What an entrance. Nice timing," Shizuno said in Engrish as the three girls left the sleigh.
"Sandwich time," Nodoka said.
"Yes, dear," Saki said.
"Ahhhhhh!" they all said, and the sleigh disappeared, with the entire team in casual gear.
"Let's go in," Nodoka said.
"HELLOOOOOO!" said the crowd inside.
"Oh my. Were you expecting us?"
"We apparently were," said Touma Kamijou.
"I had reports from my laptop that you had been giving presents to really cute girls across the country," said Kazari Uiharu. "And I bet you have more stops to go!"
"Um, maybe?" asked Shizuno.
"Also, we thought you'd be stopping here for lunch, since we tend to go here to eat," added Ruiko Saten.
"I predicted that you would arrive here at this time, and apparently there was a city-wide culture festival going on, so I arranged in the 11th hour for the participants to welcome you here," said Kuroko Shirai.
"And I had it all shared virally through social media," said Misaki Shokuhou.
"Welcome to Academy City," Mikoto Misaka said, shaking their hands.
"Hi," Nodoka said. "Nodoka Haramura."
"Shizuno Takakamo," Shizu said.
"Saki Miyanaga," Saki added.
"We came to deliver presents to important women on a list that was given to us earlier last night," Nodoka said as the team sat down to order food.
"So we've been delivering presents to people that have been nice."
"Kuroko here has been naughty," Mikoto said. "Isn't that right."
"Onee-sama, how can you say that! Onee-aaaaaah!" Electric shock.
"Don't worry, Kuroko-san," Saki said. "We got you covered, but we need to eat first."
"So," said the waitress, "what would you like to order?"
The three girls and the reindeer boys slammed down their menus. "Everything on the menu," they said flatly.
Frenda Seivelun was also at the restaurant with her confidantes. "My goodness, are you serious?"
"Ms. Frenda," Nodoka said, "delivering presents around the clock to important nice people is serious business. It's as serious as our appetites."
"Can't give out presents to people on an empty stomach, either," said Shizu, scarfing down a curry katsu plate that was extra spicy. "This is work."
"Fun work, at that," Saki added. "Once in a lifetime work." The others at the other tables collectively nodded.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, that as well. Oy, waitress! Where's my parfait?" On cue, it arrived. "GOOOOOOOOAL!" And she dug in.
"As long as you can finish it, your capacity is in good standing," Misaka #10032 concluded.
"I'm sure we won't have to worry about them finishing their food too quickly," Mikoto told Touma. "Right?"
"Look behind you," he said.
"Eh?" She face-faulted and noticed that they were finished eating and drinking in 10 minutes but needed time to let it settle. "DId you guys even chew!?" They nodded. "I thought I needed to call a medic..."
"You guys aren't going anywhere, right?" asked Shizuno as Nodoka paid the bill.
"Why do you ask?" asked Ruiko.
"We have gifts for you."
"Presents!?" Kuroko exclaimed. "Onee-sama, these wonderful girls brought us presents! Heheh, what did you order for me, onee-sama? Huh? Huh? Let me know, please!"
"Absolutely not! What I wanted has nothing to do with you, got it?" Mikot roared.
"Biribiri, calm down," Touma said.
"Jeezus, the nerve..."
"But anyway, how you are you going to send us the presents? We don't see a sleigh out here," said Kazari.
"Come outside and we'll show you," Saki said. The team was already at the door.
"You're outside already!?" Kuroko roared.
Touma and the girls left the restaurant to see the OSSI team gathered. "Watch this," Nodoka said as she was sandwiched by Saki and Shizuno to make the sleigh with gifts reappear. Also appearing was a crate.
"Girl sandwich!?" Kuroko was off her rocker again. "Onee-sama! SANDWICH ME!"
"It takes three to do that, you idiot! How about I shock you instead!" Mikoto shot back.
"Hyaaaaaaaaaah!" One shock later, Kuroko came, foaming at the mouth. She wasn't rabid, though. It was shock of love. "Haaah, haaaah, haaah."
"Um, here's your present," Touma said, offering a box.
Kuroko got back to her senses immediately and got up. "Whoa! What's in this?" Her eyes sparkled. "The finest lingerie and sex toys. For...onee-sama." Mikoto turned to her. "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Mikoto chased her down and delivered more shocks of love in embarrassment.
"Thank you for stopping by and dropping presents," Frenda said.
"Thank you very much," Misaki added.
"Merry Christmas," Kazari and Ruiko said.
"Happy Holidays from the Academy City," said #10032.
"And be sure to come back soon," Touma added. "If you want. Your call."
"Merry Christmas, bye-bye!" said Saki, Nodoka, and Shizuno, who added a hearty "Ho Ho Ho!" before pointing to the human reindeer, and the sleigh took off, the two lines of international dancers and drummers seeing it off as well.
"All right, now what's next?" asked Saki to Aika. It was 1 p.m.
"The next part of the journey, according to the list," said Aika, "is to do a quick-stopover of places, since we need to allow time for the later portions of the voyage. First, we go to the Minami residence in Tougou, Aichi Prefecture to drop presents to four members of the family."
"Let's do it," Shizu said. "Come on!" A tap and a crack and they were off. "Select a song, Nodoka."
"Ummm, okay. Ah, Etopen knows."
"Everybody knows you're the summer sails
If we're together then, why am I lunar pale?
Lost my breath in you, fell out with all my friends
Should have realised we started at the end
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Love on the run
Don't leave me hanging on
Got the warning sings, can't look me in the face
Make me forget myself, left behind my grace
Said you were dead to me, be better on my own
So why am I sitting here, just staring at the phone
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Call baby call
Don't lead me on
Love on the run
Don't leave me hanging on..."
"Oy, Kana, wake up, idiot," said Chiaki Minami to her older sister inside the Minami residence. She and the others were preparing for the Christmas party.
"Huh? Stop, Chiaki, I want to make love to my precious...hnnnnngh."
"What's going on?" asked Haruka Minami to the two of them.
"Kana has been asleep for 18.7 hours and has done nothing today but sleep."
"What if I told you," Touma Minami said, walking to the three of them, "that we have a crate of presents outside?"
Kana snapped out of her sleep. "Presents! It's Christmas already!? YEEEE HOOOOO!" Chiaki tripped her, causing her to stumble hard.
"Slow down," Chiaki said.
"Ugh..." Kana was the last to get to the entrace of the house and saw the large crate. "It's big." Chiaki took the opportunity to ram Kana's face into the button, sending her flying again. "Owwww..."
"Presents," said Chiaki. "Cool..."
"Wow, I got the clothes and books I was looking for," Haruka said.
"What did I get?" Kana grinned. "Ow!" She was knocked out by her own present that Chiaki threw at her. "Study books? Oh, there's some light novels here too. Woot, I got what I was looking for. Oh, yes and and 'I AM BOSS' shirt...with matching underwear..." Chiaki went to her and delivered a roundhouse kick. "Ohhhhh, mercy!"
"That's enough, Chiaki," Touma said. "Oh, I got some cosplay outfits. A Ciel Phantomhive set and a Souseiseki set. No need to make these myself, I guess."
"And I got some new clothes," Haruka said. "And hipster glasses. I've always wanted to look like a hipster and see if I could change the way I looked."
"I'd love to look like a hipster too," Kana said, "but then I wouldn't be Tail Red."
"Who's that?" the other three said.
"Some girl that is actually a guy. OOOF." A kick to the womanhood. "I've said...too much."
"Oy!" Chiaki called out to the people on the sleigh. "Thanks!"
"Merry Christmas," Haruka said.
"Merry Christmas," said the three girls in the sleigh.
"Let's go," Shizuno said, pointing to the human reindeer.
"Quick!" Saki added as the sleigh departed.
"Oy," Chiaki said to Kana. "Are you all right."
Her chestnut mouth told no lies. "I live for this."
"And so, the next stop," said Aika, "is for you to head to Synapse to send gifts to two angeloids; however, one will be accepting both."
"Synapse?" Shizuno said. "Where is that?"
"All these places," Nodoka wondered. "My head is spinning..."
"Synapse is located in the skies. The reindeer know the coordinates. Normally, you would be attacked by the Zeus anti-aircraft defense system, but since it no longer exists, you should be able to fly there without being attacked. There are residents awaiting your arrival and they have been informed in advance that you are scheduled to arrive. This is one that you will do with heavy hearts because one of the recipients that will receive a present...is dead."
"Oh my God..." Saki said before making a sign of the cross. "This is a serious thing."
"Are you ready to head there?"
"Let's go. The goodwill of mahjong players across the country is counting on us," Nodoka said.
"To Synapse!" Saki said, cracking the whip after a button tap. A large fleet of panties were accompanying the sleigh at it flew towards its destination.
"Why is there flying underwear accompanying us on this trip?" asked Saki.
"Perhaps this is to ensure that there is no sorrow from heading to our destination," Nodoka replied.
Shizuno nodded, putting her aviators back on, tears flowing from her eyes. "Sail," she whispered in English, sounding like Ryuuko Matoi.
"Sail!
This is how I show my love
I made it in my mind because
I blame it on my A.D.D. baby
This is how an angel dies
I blame it on my own supply
Blame it on my A.D.D. baby
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Maybe I should cry for help
Maybe I should kill myself (myself)
Blame it on my A.D.D. baby
Maybe I'm a different breed
Maybe I'm not listening
So blame it on my A.D.D. baby
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
La la la la la
La la la la la oh!
La la la la la,
La la la la la oh!
La la la la la,
La la la la la,
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail!
Sail with me into the dark
Sail!
Sail with me into the dark
Sail!
Sail with me into the dark
Sail!
Sail with me
Sail!"
Nymph, who was rebuilt with her memories intact after her previous self destructed many months ago, looked towards the skies, sitting down on her island in the region of Synapse, and a cherry tree, reflecting on Ikaros and her love for Tomoki Sakurai. It was a shame that he could never have a real family or become a father, at least not yet. But she was happy to still be alive and be in the place where it all began. Today, on Christmas Eve, she was assigned to accept a gift for herself and a gift for Ikaros which she would open for her. This was made via request by Tomoki. Astraea and Chaos were not with her; she was asked to go to Synapse alone to accept the gifts.
"Second chances...are things that I never take for granted," she said to herself, closing her eyes and feeling a strong breeze. A flash of light forced them to open after a few minutes. "Ah, here they are," she said, the sleigh arriving to the strains to the AWOLNATION song before touching down.
"Let's get off," said Shizuno as the other two got off the sleigh and two gift boxes, one pink and one blue, came out of the orb in the back. "So this is Synapse, huh?"
"The cause for a new world," Nodoka said. "I could never imagine such a beautiful place."
"My sister is gonna be so jealous that I got to actually visit heaven and live to tell about it," Saki said.
"You must be the three I have been looking for," Nymph said as she approached them. "My name is Nymph. Welcome to Synapse." Soon, she was being embraced by Shizuno. "Huh?"
"I'm sorry about what happened to Ikaros!" Shizuno said. "I'm Shizuno, by the way."
"You know her?"
"I saw a vision of her smiling at Tomoki while we were on our flight here to give you your presents. I hate giving gifts to anybody that's gone. It's no fun!"
"I'm sure she feels the same way."
"Here's your presents," Saki said, handing her the boxes.
"Oooh, snacks from around the world, and gift baskets," Nymph said. "And what is this for Ikaros?"
"Open it, I don't know what it is, either," Nodoka said.
Nymph did. "A wedding dress and a wedding ring. Oh?" The dress and ring levitated and turned into rays of light that went into the stratosphere.
They all turned around. It was a vision of Ikaros, now dressed in her wedding dress and wearing the ring.
"I...Ikaros!?" Nymph exclaimed, the tears falling out of her eyes.
"Everyone..." she said to them. "It's been a while."
"So you are Ikaros," Shizuno said. "Oh my gosh. I'm sorry for what happened to you."
"Shizuno Takakamo is your name, correct."
"Yes. Yes!"
"This dress what what Tomoki wanted me to wear if we were able to have our wedding. And this ring...he chose this for me, it seems. It's beautiful."
"Ikaros!" Nodoka called out. "This is Nodoka Haramura of the Kiyosumi High School Mahjong Club! On behalf of everyone here, we want to wish you a Merry Christmas to you and to Nymph, Astraea and Chaos!"
"Merry Christmas as well from Saki Miyanaga!" said Saki.
"Thank you, Merry Christmas to all of you," Ikaros said through her tears of joy. "One day, I'll be able to see all of you...and Tomoki...again..farewell, and be safe..." With a smile, Ikaros disappeared.
Nymph, who was also crying, received a group hug from the three of them. "Merry Christmas as well from me. Don't work too hard. Do you have other stops to go to?"
"We're on a schedule, we have more stops to go to," Nodoka said.
"Come back here anytime you want if you need to refresh, okay?"
"As long as we can fly to here, you bet on it," Shizuno said with a wink and a thumbs up. "This place rocks." The three girls got on their sleigh.
"Have a wonderful trip and Happy New Year, too," said Nymph.
"Same to you!" Nodoka added.
"One more time!" Shizuno said, pointing to the human reindeer. "SAIL!" she cried. The sleigh flew around and then departed Synapse to the strains of the song before they were debriefed on their next mission.
"So, how was it?" asked Aika to the team as the song concluded.
"Emotional," Shizuno said. "I realized it was Ikaros and she received a wedding dress and ring."
"That really was something," Nodoka said. "I kinda felt bad for her but at the same time, she truly is in a better place right now."
"Ready for the next mission?" AIka asked.
"Are we going to give presents to more deceased maidens again?" Shizu asked.
"Nope, this time you be flying into the future to receive presents."
"The future?" asked the three girls.
"Yep. You will be heading eight years into the future on this same day."
"This thing can travel through time?" Shizu asked. "Ooooh, man!"
"Feel better?"
"Absolutely! Maybe I could see myself now having a chest for once."
"Don't...go...there..." Nodoka said.
"I wasn't talking about you," she snarked back.
"Anyway," Aika said, "You will have to send presents to seven people in the timeline assigned. Their names are listed in the screen next to me."
"Kirito, Asuna, Leafa, Silica, Sinon, Yuuki, and Lisbeth?" Shizu said. "They don't lift a middle finger to Nodocchi, I'm afraid."
"They don't play mahjong, though," said Nodoka. "They play MMORPGs."
"I thought online mahjong was an MMORPG?"
"Completely different."
"Enough, let's go," Saki said, tapping a button and cracking the whip before selecting a song as the sleigh traveled through time.
"Sixteen years - without even a place to call my own,
but I'll dry my tears looking for a place to rest my bones.
All these years - but never changed the one that I have known.
And despite my fears - I'm sure that I can make it on my own.
Quality drugs and limousines - oh Momma this is killing me.
I'm half the man I used to be.
To give to lust and gambling - Oh Momma I need rescuing.
What sixteen years has done to me.
Sixteen years - burning every bridge that I have known.
Without you here, the world has gotten colder on my own.
Quality drugs and limousines - Oh Momma this is killing me.
I'm half the man I used to be.
To give to lust and gambling - Oh Momma I need rescuing.
What sixteen years has done to me.
There's nothing like it - I'm going away.
There's nothing like the feeling -
Of being alone now on a New York street,
gives everything some meaning.
There's nothing like being torn apart -
from a love you've known right from the start.
There's nothing like this feeling.
Quality drugs and limousines - Oh Momma this is killing me.
I'm half the man I used to be.
To give to lust and gambling - Oh Momma I need rescuing.
What sixteen years has done to me.
It's what sixteen years has done to me.
It's what sixteen years has done to me."
"We're halfway to clearing the time vortex and arriving in Tokyo in 2022," said Saki said to the other two. "What song should we play?"
"How about some more Monarchy?" asked Shizuno.
"We must really like that band. What do you have in mind?"
"This."
"I watch you from afar
Can't reach your burning star
Still I will to keep you safe in my sight
I know we hardly speak
But your words I can complete
I have built you up too high to talk you down
And I won't let go
I won't let go of you
There's no limit to my love
No limit to my love
I won't let go my love
Can't step over the line
And you don't give me any sign
So I will take a deep breath and rise up
I live unnaturally
Half with you half with me
All my words lay waisted at your feet
Can't you see I'm waiting for you to come back to me
I never left you only you can choose what you wanna see
What can I do I'm still in love with you...
And I won't let go
I won't let go of you
There's no limit to my love
No limit to my love
I won't let go my love
And I won't let go
And I won't let go
And I won't let go..."
"Um, actually," said Aika as the team members entered Tokyo in the year 2022, "there was one thing I forgot to tell you. And you're not going to like this, Shizuno."
"What is it?"
"I'll give you her real name: it's Yuuki Konno. She has passed away due to AIDS."
"Wow, I didn't think this would happen to her,"
"So how is this going to work?" Saki asked.
"Her gift is actually going to be the biggest of them all. And this time, I will tell you what it is. Her gravesite will have an elaborate monument in which she exchanges a handshake with Asuna. The second part is that on Christmas Day, a foundation will be created in her name in cooperation with the University of Tokyo, dedicated to AIDS research, as well as research of cancer and other diseases. This amount to start this is 100,000,000 yen and is signed off by the organizer of this expedition, whom you will meet at the tail end of this journey. Donations will be accepting starting midnight, Christmas Day, 2022."
"Donating cash through time for a cause..." Saki mused. "If I wasn't a mahjong pro, I might consider philanthropy."
"The sleigh will head to the cemetery where Yuuki and her family are buried. You will be there in a few minutes. A crowd of 1,000 will be there to welcome you, comprising of all of the active players that are alive. This is also where you will hand the presents to the others on the list."
Shizuno took a deep gulp and did a sign of the cross. "Hang on, Yuuki, we're coming."
Asuna Yuuki and Kazuto KIrigaya looked at the tomb of their friend who was gone. It was a long time since she passed, but to think she was in a better place, that was a comforting feeling. The others were there with the two of them: Keiko Ayano, Rika Shinozaki, Shino Asada, and Kazuto's beloved cousin, Suguha Kirigaya. They were laying flowers, and many others from across Japan who were playing ALfheim Online were paying tribute to her. One gamer even did bagpipes, playing "Amazing Grace" and "Abide With Me."
"It hurts," Asuna said, the tears flowing down her face. "It hurts so much..."
"Asuna, I know it does," Kazuto said. "She's in a better place now. She is not suffering any more."
"I wish she never had to go like this, though. I wish she never had to."
"We're all going to see her again, Asuna." said Suguha. "All of us. She doesn't want us to see us yet. She wants us to live our lives, because that's what she did, and that's how she would have wanted it for us."
"She was a tough act to follow and was very brave in what she did," said Shino.
"I couldn't said it any better myself," said Rika.
Keiko nodded. "No one should die because of something like this."
As they continued to reflect, they noticed a sleigh rolling in. "Why is a sleigh here?" asked Asuna.
"To cheer us up," Kazuto said with a smile, brushing away a tear and kissing Asuna. "Hey, you guys," he called.
"This must be the place," Shizu said. "Hello. My name is Shizuno Takakamo. She's Nodoka Haramura, and she's Saki Miyanaga. We come from the past and are bringing Christmas presents to a number of people."
"Christmas presents at a cemetery?" RIka asked. "Are you sure this is the right place to do it?"
"There are two reasons," Nodoka said. "First, we're on a schedule and need to head to other places. Second, we know about the death of one of your beloved friends. Yuuki Konno."
"You know about her?" asked Keiko.
Saki. "We may not have known her, but we heard about her story, and we send our condolences to all of you here. And apparently we have been sent to deliver gifts as part of her will that we were able to find. It's two parts." A whistle. "Boys!"
The human reindeer slowly carried a large tombstone over the then-unmarked grave.
"Oh my gosh," Asuna said, tears falling out of her eyes, smiling through her clasped hands. The flowers began to bloom in the cemetery as the crowd admired the monument. At the top was Yuuki and Asuna exchanging a handshake with wings on their backs. On the base of the headstone was her name in kanji, the dates of the lives of her family members, the date of her own life, her IGN and an insignia.
Five dashes from top right to bottom left. Five dashes from top left to bottom right. And a stylized Catholic cross to represent the finishing move that represented her. "This...is the Mother's Rosario! This is beautiful! This is amazing!"
"It's more than that," said Nodoka, upon further review. She walked over, stroked the insignia and placed her hand on it. The monument glowed. "Yuuki, can you hear us?" she asked.
A few second later a voice. "Who...who's there?" she asked.
"Oh my, she sounds like me!" Shizuno cried.
"Y...YUUKI! Can you hear us! It's Asuna!" she wailed. Kazuto had to hold her back before she fell to her knees in awe.
"So you can still talk to us," Nodoka said. "Hello."
"Hello...who are you?" Soon enough, a spectre version of her online avatar appeared, drawing an collective gasp of amazement.
"My name is Nodoka Haramura, and I come from the past," she said. "Look around you. These are the people who you left, and they miss you. They are happy that you have found happiness and are not suffering."
Asuna was crying. "This can't be true...this can't be true..."
"Yuuki, is it really you?" Kazuto asked.
"It is," she said, flying over to Asuna to comfort her. "Asuna, look up. It's me."
"Yuuki, I missed you..." Asuna whispered. "This should never have happened to you. I miss you so much."
"I know. I miss being here. But I realized that I needed to offer a present to everyone for being so nice and for being by my side before I finally left. That's why," said Yuuki, "This monument is here to commemorate the time I finally realized happiness."
"Yuuki-chan?" asked Shizuno.
"Yes?"
"I'm Shizuno Takakamo of the Achiga Mahjong Club. On behalf of all of us, we wanted to say Merry Christmas to you. We never got to know you, but we heard about your heroic battle, and we realized that you wanted to start something important." She gave the box of cash to Asuna.
"Ah, this is it," Yuuki said. "This money will be used to start a foundation dedicated to AIDS research, cancer research, and research of terminal illnesses. Asuna, please deposit the money and start up the foundation so that people will be able to give and donate. Everyone, I don't want anybody to suffer like I did."
"Yuuki," Asuna whispered, tears still flowing, but she was smiling as she brushed a tear.
"Life is too precious, too important. I want everybody this holiday season...to enjoy life the fullest and live for now. Because if you don't enjoy life and realize that it's the greatest thing that could happen to you, I will never forgive you."
"I will. I will, Yuuki. I will...Yuuki..." The two Yuukis embraced.
"And as long as I am resting here, you can talk to me whenever you want. But I know you'll be all right. You have friends who care for you, you have a community of gamers and guilds that have your back...and you have your future husband readying himself for the next part of his life...with you."
"Kazuto..." Asuna whispered as he embraced her. "This...is the greatest Christmas present I could ever have!"
"We'll make sure your foundation gets up and running and people learn about your story and they donate," Shino said.
"We got your back," Suguya added. "Thanks for everything."
"You've made our holiday, that's for sure," said Keiko. "Be safe wherever you go!"
"There's nothing to worry about everyone," said Rika. "This is a time to celebrate and enjoy the holidays and living. Right, everyone?"
"RIGHT!" the crowd said.
"That's what I want to hear," Yuuki said, flying back to the headstone. "Goodbye and Merry Christmas. Shizuno, Saki and Nodoka, Merry Christmas to you too and be safe when you head back, okay?"
"You got it!" Shizu said. "I'm not afraid of anything anymore because you sound like me!"
A wink. "Coincidence..."
"Wehihihi."
"Farewell everyone!" Yuuki said, waving.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" the crowd said as Yuuki disappeared.
"Thank you, you guys," Asuna said to the three girls. "Thank you so much. Thank you for the gifts and for really giving me a reason to enjoy the holidays."
"What are you talking about?" Shizu said. "The holidays were always meant to be enjoyed. And besides, you have a husband that won't just be an in-game husband soon."
"We better get going," said Saki, getting on the sleigh.
"Thanks a lot for the gifts," Suguha said. "We salute you!"
"Drive safe on the way back to your timeline!" Keiko added.
"We got this," said Shizu. "And we got Yuuki's back as well. She's only three in our timeline! We got both Yuukis' backs. Two for one! Till death do we part!"
They got a good laugh. "Ready?" Rika said to the crowd. "1, 2, 3!"
"MERRY CHRISTMAS SAKI!" they all exclaimed.
"Merry Christmas, guys. Let's go!" Saki shouted to the human reindeer as the sled flew off and reentered the time vortex to go back to 2014.
"So what song should we play?" asked Shizuno to the two of them as they traveled back to their current timeline.
"Maybe a little John Legend?" asked Nodoka.
"I know what you're thinking..." Saki replied. "But first, some Sunday music."
"Childhood living is easy to do
The things that you wanted, I bought them for you
Graceless lady, you know who I am
You know I can't let you slide through my hands
Wild horses couldn't drag me away
Wild horses couldn't drag me away
I watched you suffer a dull, aching pain
And now you decided just to show me the same
No sweeping exit or offstage lines
Can make me feel bitter or treat you unkind
Wild horses couldn't drag me away
Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away
Faith has been broken and tears must be cried
Let's do some living after we die
Wild horses couldn't drag me away
Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away
Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday
Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday."
"Oh yeah, that really does reflect the relationship between the two Yuukis," Shizuno said.
"Okay, we can play that John Legend song," said Saki.
"Playing."
"What would I do without your smart mouth
Drawing me in, and you kicking me out
You got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down
What's going on in that beautiful mind
I'm on your magical mystery ride
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright
My head's underwater
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind
'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh
How many times do I have to tell you
Even when you're crying you're beautiful too
The world is beating you down, I'm around through every mood
You're my downfall, you're my muse
My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues
I can't stop singing, it's ringing in my head for you
My head's underwater
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind
'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh
Give me all of you, oh oh
Cards on the table, we're both showing hearts
Risking it all though it's hard
Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you
I give you all of me
And you give me all, of you, oh oh oh..."
"That fits the relationship between the two Yuukis so well," said Nodoka.
"Lesbian, even?" Shizuno said.
"There you go again, stating what we already know!"
"Actually, that's more for Kirito and Asuna. Hey, maybe another piano song will give us closure to what is already a tough afternoon for us," Saki said.
"Walk blindly to the light and reach out for his hand
Don't ask any questions and don't try to understand
Open up your mind and then open up your heart
And you will see that you and me aren't very far apart
'Cause I believe that love is the answer
I believe that love will find the way
Violence is spread worldwide and there are families on the street
And we sell drugs to children now oh why can't we just see
That all we do is eliminate our future with the things we do today
Money is our incentive now so that makes it okay
But I believe that love is the answer
I believe that love will find the way
I believe that love is the answer
I believe that love will find the way
I've been seeing Lisa now for a little over a year
She said she's never been so happy but Lisa lives in fear
That one day daddy's gonna find out she's in love
With a nigger from the streets
Oh how he would lose it then but she's still here with me
'Cause she believes that love will see it through
And one day he'll understand
And he'll see me as a person not just a black man
'Cause I believe that love is the answer
I believe that love will find the way
I believe I believe I believe I believe that love is the answer
I believe that love will find the way
Love will find the way
Love will find the way
Love will find the way
Please love find the way
Please love find the way..."
"How was it?" Aika asked the three of them as they returned to the current timeline.
"You gotta stop doing this to us, Aika," said Shizu. "That's the second dead person we've sent gifts to."
"I'm not the one who made the list, Shizuno. The higher-ups were the ones. The higher-ups."
"Still, she was a pretty nice lady we met, even though she's now a ghost in that timeline," said Ndoka.
"I liked her, though. I liked her positivity," Shizuno said. "It's just like mine's. And she sounds like me, which is a bigger plus!"
"Are you ready for the next mission?" Aika asked.
"I could do this until Boxing Day if I wanted to!" Shizu said. "Bring it on! Death could never make a fool of the great Shizuno Takakamo! Never!"
"Calm down, Shizu," Nodoka said, snuggling her with her cleavage.
"Never...never..."
"The next mission, guys, is one you will like."
"OOOOOOOH!"
"You're heading to Kyousuke Kousaka's house to deliver gifts to three people. Kyousuke himself won't be at the house because he's on assignment to buy things, but there are three girls that will be awaiting you at the door so this can be quick. They have been asked ahead of time to wait."
"A quick one this time," Nodoka said. "That works." A tap and crack and they flew.
"We gotta get moving here folks," said Saki. Five minutes later... "Fortunately we're here."
"Santa exists?" Ruri Gokou said in her trademark Kuroneko gothic uniform with cat ears and tail. "There's three of them, though."
"So you're the guys sending them out?" asked Kyousuke's sister Kirino, who was pregnant through a sperm donation.
"Thanks for coming down here and giving us something!" added Manami Tamura.
"Our pleasure," Shizu send, pressing a button. "Watch out..."
"Whoa," Ruri said as the crate descended down. "A button. Will press." She pressed it. "Fantastic. Christmas presents. Thank you, you guys!" she said, flashing a cat pose.
"Enjoy your Christmas!" Nodoka said. "There's gifts for your other friends too, so make sure they come to your party."
"Will do. Thanks a lot!" Kirino said. "Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas," Nodoka said. "Hyaaah!" And just like that, the team was gone.
"Okay," Aika said. "Your next stop is to go to...the Araragi Residence."
"Where is that?" asked Shizuno.
"We got coordinates here," she said, showing a screen. "It's a three-story house, it's yellow, and there is space for you to temporarily park to unload the gifts."
"Cool."
"And also, there will be all of Koyomi Araragi's women awaiting your arrival. You will be hand-delivering their presents to them."
"Got it!" the three girls said. "Here we go!"
"Can we play a disco song this time?" Shizuno asked.
"What do you got in mind?" Saki asked.
"Heheh...this."
"Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Tonight I wanna give it all to you
In the darkness
There's so much I wanna do
And tonight I wanna lay it at your feet
'Cause girl, I was made for you
And girl, you were made for me
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can't get enough of you baby
Can you get enough of me
Tonight I wanna see it in your eyes
Feel the magic
There's something that drives me wild
And tonight we're gonna make it all come true
'Cause girl, you were made for me
And girl I was made for you
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can't get enough of you baby
Can you get enough of me
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can give it all to you baby
Can you give it all to me
Oh, can't get enough, oh, oh
I can't get enough, oh, oh
I can't get enough
Yeah, ha
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can't get enough of you baby
Can you get enough of me
Oh, I was made, you were made
I can't get enough
No, I can't get enough
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can't get enough of you baby
Can you get enough of me
I was made for lovin' you baby
You were made for lovin' me
And I can give it all to you baby
Can you get enough of me?"
Nadeko Sengoku looked in the distance and noticed the sleigh rolling in. "Ah, this must be them."
"What is that?" asked Mayoi Hachikuji.
"It's the sleigh," said Suruga Kanbaru. "And, are those humans as reindeer."
"Oh my gosh," said Tsubasa Hanekawa. "I didn't know that humans could tow sleighs after all."
"A little magic, a little poke at logic and physics and anything is possible," said Hitagi Senjougahara. "Isn't that right, Koyomi?"
"I guess so," he said.
"Human reindeer?" asked his sister Karen.
"Now I've seen everything," added his other sister Tsukihi. Shinobu Oshino was too busy eating a pile of donuts at the door to pay attention. Slowly, the sleigh touched down, and the three girls driving it got off.
"Are you Santa's elves?" asked Mayoi with a sleazeback look. A flock of seagulls flew in the air.
"No, we're mahjong players delivering gifts to women," Shizuno deadpanned, causing the others to fall over.
"You seriously aren't going to give me a present even though I'm the man of this house!?" Koyomi roared, his ahoge on fire.
"We were trolling you," Saki said. "Here, champ."
"Heheheheheheh..." Koyomi quickly opened the present. "Fantastic. DVDs of different shows. And...and..."
"Porn," the others said.
"Will you stop that!"
"I knew Araragi was trouble," Tsubasa said.
"Tell us something we don't know, brother!" Karen and Tsukihi exclaimed.
"Here's your present," Shizu said, giving Shinobu a present.
"Hm?" She opened it. A lifetime supply of Krispy Kreme donuts. She offered a fist.
"Eh?"
A fist bump. "Good job," she said. "Merry Christmas."
With a nod, Shizuno returned to the others as the others girls got their gifts.
"Thanks for the presents," Nadeko said.
"Are you leaving already?" Suruga asked.
"We're on a schedule," Saki said.
"Oh," said all of Koyomi's harem.
"Well, Merry Christmas to the three of you, thanks," Koyomi said as they went back on the sleigh. "Huh?" He noticed that he was carrying all of the boxes. "Hey! Just what is the meaning of this!?" To rub salt in the wounds, the sleigh took off, leaving him alone, comically. "Mother of God, such misfortune." Hitagi looked at him and had to giggle.
"Next stop?" asked Nodoka to Aika.
"The next stop is Shiro Emiya's residence in Miyama Town, a suburb of Fuyuki City," Aika said. "Five girls will be looking for you outside the door. As ypu are not coming into the city with any malicious intents and this is considered a humanitarian mission, the barrier's bell will be deactivated for this delivery."
"Cool," Shizuno said. "Step on it boys!"
"YEEAAAAAAH!" the human reindeer said, skating through the eastern skies towards Miyama Town.
"Franz Ferdinand time," Shizu said, activating the next song.
"You see her, you can't touch her
You hear her, you can't hold her
You want her, you can't have her
You want to, but she won't let you
And you see her, you can't touch her
You hear her, you can't hold her
You want her, you can't have her
You want to, but she won't let you
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done
Now, you wish she'd never
Come back here again
Oh, never
Come back here again
You see her, you can't touch her
You hear her, you can't hold her
You want her, you can't have her
You want to, but she won't let you
And you see her, you can't touch her
But you hear her, you can't hold her
You want her, you can't have her
And you want to, but she won't let you
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done, boy
She's not so special so look what you've done
And now, I'm nailed above you gushing from my side
It's with your sins that you have killed me thinking of your sins I die
Thinking how you'd let them touch you how you'd never realize
That I'm ripped and hang forsaken knowing never will I rise again
You still see her
Oh, you hear her
You want her
Oh, you want to
And you see her
And you still hear her
And you want her
And you still want to..."
One thing about Saber was that she wasn't just a competent fighter. She was also savvy regarding her cooking and decided to help Shiro with cooking around the house due to her obligations to him. Sakura Matou and Rin Tohsaka were inside the residence to also prepare for the party, and even Illyasviel von Einzbern and Taiga Fujimura were joining in to assist.
"Should I add a few more vegetable to this, Shiro?" Saber asked.
"Yeah, add some string beans and carrots to the pot," he replied. A few chops later, they were in.
"La, la, la, la, la," Illyasviel said, mopping the floor enthusiastically.
"She seems to be enjoying this, isn't she?" Sakura asked Rin.
"She likes cleaning the house all of a sudden, Illya does."
"And she does it so well," Sakura pulled down the stove door to check on the turkey. "Gotta baste this a bit." Pulling it out, she took out a brush and basted the bird before putting it back in the oven.
"How much longer do you think it's gonna take?" asked Rin.
"Maybe one hour."
"Don't burn it, or else we're gonna have to order pizza, you know."
"I think she'll be fine," Shiro said.
"If you say so,.."
"All right, stop what you're doing, I have news to tell you," Taiga said. "We have something waiting outside for us...take a look."
"Oh wow," Saber said, putting the heat on low before heading outside.
"Good afternoon, everyone," Shizuno said. "Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas," Shiro said. "Do you have something for us."
"Hey, I know that face!" Sakura said. She pointed to Nodoka. "You're...you're Nodocchi, aren't you! From that show!"
"Yeah, that's me," Nodoka said.
"Oh wow, you guys, you are the mahjong players from the tournament, right?"
"We are," Saki said.
"Bring those presents over!"
"I wanna get mine first!" Illya said. "Gimme!"
"Slow down," Taiga said, pulling her away.
"Awww."
"You have to press a button first," she said, pointing.
"And...done. Now what?" She turned around. "Presents!"
"All right," Shiro said. "We're gonna go ahead and put this inside. Thanks a lot."
"Thank you very much and Merry Christmas," Rin added.
"The guy who's making us do this work loves girls with twintails, by the way," added Shizuno. "He loves you too."
"Tell him thanks and be safe."
"All right, Merry Christmas!" Sakura said.
"Okay, let's go!" Saki said. "Bye-bye!" And the sleigh took off.
"Next stop, Aika?" asked Nodoka to Aika over the monitor.
"Hmmm, this next stop is one you'll like," she said. "You will be heading to Fujou High in Tokyo."
"What do we do there?"
"There's three people that will be receiving gifts, and they will get it at the entrance. This is a drop-off."
"How far is it from here?"
"Minutes away," Aika said.
"All right, let's do this," Since they were minutes away, the girls decided not to play a song.
Funabori was busy taking random Instagram shots on her iPad, even perfecting her trademark blush when she is given the love for her awesomeness. "What are you doing?" asked Roka Shibasaki.
"Taking photos," she said.
"Cool. Have you seen anything weird."
"Not really. Just a few birds pecking at crumbs."
Takao was looking up at the sky. "Here they are."
"Fantastic," Roka said. "Now we can head home after sitting out here for the last three hours!"
"Hey there!" Takao said, waving as the three girls came off to bring the gifts.
"Merry Christmas," said Nodoka to Takao. "Nice rack by the way."
"Eh? That is...that is..."
"It's as big as mine's."
"That's not what I wanted to hear!" Takao despaired, falling to her knees in a wariza position.
"Tough. Enjoy your present."
"Here's your present," Shizu said to Roka.
"Thank you very much. Merry Christmas," she said.
"And for you," Saki said to Funabori, handing her a present. That caused Funabori to blush and tremble with happiness. "Um...are you all right?"
"You've made Funabori happy," Takao said. "You made her day."
"Thank you," Funabori said. She couldn't help it and decided to give Saki a hug. "THANK YOU!"
"Pleasure is all mine," she replied, petting Funabori's head. "Take it easy."
"You're like an angel. You're on a sleigh run by boys! And magic. Whoa...you're truly amazing and made my year!"
"And speaking of which," Shizu said, "we gotta get on this sleigh and head to the next stop right NOW! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! See you!"
"Merry Christmas!" said Takao, Funabori and Roka as the sleigh took off.
"Goody, goody, goody," Shizu said. "Next stop?"
"Fantastic," Aika said. "This next stop is a big one. folks. You're heading to Elchea City to drop presents for three people."
"Where is that?" asked Shizuno.
"It's located in a dimension called Disboard," Aika said. "Unlike Japan, they prefer to play games like chess and card games. You are to head to the Inn to drop the presents. They'll be waiting for you."
"Sooner or later, this delivery thing, this is going to tire us," Nodoka said.
"But that's what Santa does, you know," Shizuno said. "Ever heard of Alan Parsons?"
"Oh, the Imanity..."
"Where do we go from here now that all other children are growin' up
And how do we spend our lives if there's no-one to lend us a hand
I don't wanna live here no more, I don't wanna stay
Ain't gonna spend the rest of my life, Quietly fading away
Games people play, You take it or you leave it
Things that they say, Honor Brite
If I promise you the Moon and the Stars, Would you believe it
Games people play in the middle of the night
Where do we go from here now that all of the children have grown up
And how do we spend our time knowin' nobody gives us a damn
I don't wanna live here no more, I don't wanna stay
Ain't gonna spend the rest of my life, Quietly fading away
Games people play, You take it or leave it
Things that they say, Just don't make it right
If I'm tellin' you the truth right now, do you believe it
Games people play in the middle of the night
Games people play, You take it or you leave it
Things that they say, Honor Brite
If I promise you the Moon and the Stars, Would you believe it
Games people play in the middle of the night
Games people play, You take it or leave it
Things that they say, Just don't make it right
If I'm tellin' you the truth right now, do you believe it
Games people play in the middle of the night."
Inside the inn, Sora, Shiro, Jibril and Stephanie Dola were playing a game of poker, which was a change of pace from the usual card games they played. Naturally, Stephanie couldn't lift a middle finger to the other thee and was forced to cast off her garments, triggering a look of glee from Sora and a look of disgust from Shiro.
"This is so not fair," Steph said, completely blushing.
"Heheheheheh, I'm not complaining," Sora said, smug as a mug, perusing the epitome of imperfect perfection that was...Le Steph.
"You're one to talk!"
"Big brother, calm down, please," Shiro said.
"This doesn't look good for Steph unfortunately," Jibril admitted.
"I know you want us to have the world, don't you?" Sora said. "They say the longest journey begins with the smallest step..."
"Big brother, are you touching yourself again?" Shiro deadpanned as she continued to look at his hand.
"What does it look like, I'm getting burned here!" Steph roared, fire coming out of her mouth. On cue, the door opened, causing her to grab a towel to cover herself. "Oh God, don't you even knock!?"
"Everyone, the sleigh has arrived," said the innkeeper.
"Take a break," Sora said, "Put some clothes on, Steph. One of the girls outside is lewder than I will ever be. Just a guess."
"A guess!? Tch!" Stephanie immediately put her garments on and headed out with the other three. "The nerves of men...and siblings..."
"Hello," Shizuno said. "Special Christmas delivery from the real world!"
"Oh, we got presents?" Shiro ran over to Steph and rotated her so she could see the crate. "What the hell, a crate? What is this thing doing here!?"
"I think there's a button you have to push," said Jibril.
"A button?" Shiro pushed Stephanie into the button to allow her bust to press it. "Hey, what is the meaning of...oh! PRESENTS!" She was wallowing in joy.
"Cool, do I get any?" Sora asked.
"One box for both of us, big brother," Shiro said grabbing it. "One big box."
"Oooh," Sora said. "Let's see what we got...mmm, a new card table, a new laptop and tablet, yes, and oh, we have some cards, a lifetime subscription to Playboy Elchea, yes! And, all right, high quality amateur porn vids and an exclusive interview...with RON JEREMY! Legend! You beauty! Oh yes!"
"And I have new cosplay outfits and accessories," Shiro said. She then pulled out a shampoo bottle and a box of fancy soap from Europe. "Big brother, I told you, I don't like to take baths!"
"Shiro, at some point in your you're gonna have to learn that taking a shower regularly is actually beneficial to you health," Stephanie said. She then felt a breeze. "Ahhhh, my underwear, dammit!"
"I should let you know that we mahjong players generally don't wear underwear, either," Nodoka said.
"Is that even legal in the real world!?" Steph cried.
"As long as you don't get arrested," Saki deadpanned.
"Oh girls, don't ever change..." she wailed.
"So soft," Shiro said, taking a sniff of Steph's underwear before her panties on her head. "A nice scent."
Stephanie was on the verge on losing it again. "OH SWEET JESUS!"
"What about your present?" Jibriil asked as the siblings were carrying their boxes.
Stephanie snapped out of it. "Oh yeah." Taking a deep breath, she picked up her box and curtsied. "I'm Stephanie Dola, she's Shiro, she's Jibril, and he's...Sora. Thank you for the gifts and stopping by, I hope you liked our wonderful home out here!" And a head tilt.
"I'm Shizuno Takakamo, and she's Nodoka Haramura and she's Saki Miyanaga," said Shizuno, pointing. "We're mahjong players. Enjoy your gifts and Merry Christmas."
"Christmas! Oh, it's that time, huh? I think I should do some last-minute shopping..."
"You should wear this first," Shiro said, handing Steph back her bra and panties.
"You...gimme that!" She snatched them back. "Anyway, are you heading off right now?"
"We gotta get going, we have a lot more stops to go before it's midnight," Shizuno said, getting back on the sleigh with Saki and Nodoka. "Game on, all of you!"
"Merry Christmas," said Shiro, Sora and Jibril.
Stephanie was bawling crocodile tears through her bitter smile. "Why me...why me..."
Sora offered his hand. "Get up, Princess."
"I'm a queen! A queen."
"No, to us you're still Steph," Shiro deadpanned.
"Ahhhhh, someone just ravage me now!" Steph said, falling on her knees, the back of her hand to her forehead.
"Do you want me to volunteer?" she asked, towering over her imposingly.
"NO, NOT YOU! ANYBODY BUT YOU, JESUS!"
"You really are something," Sora said in his sexy voice, taking her by the hand.
Soon enough, Stephanie felt like she was on a cloud. "So...ra..." she whispered, still clutching her gift and her underwear. "Haaaa..."
"Ahem," Shiro replied, pointing to her. She was grabbing Sora's other hand.
"Mi dios, por favor, ¡quiero morir!" Stephanie sobbed through her now-geniune tears, now sounding like a vain Equestrian pony named Rarity in despair as the siblings dragged her back to the inn.
"Steady on, Stephanie," Jibril concluded. "Steady on..."
Unimpressed, the three girls all tilted their head to the front in unison and put on their aviators. "Vamonos," they all said, and they hightailed out of Elchea immediately. It wouldn't be long before riichi mahjong became a new, effective way to resolve conflicts across Disboard, as all 10 Pledges could be adapted to the fast-flowing gameplay. Later that day, Stephanie would buy a gift for Clammy Zell as a peace pipe offering.
"And now what's our next mission?" asked Shizuno to Aika.
"This is the last mission I will give on my end before...Thouars takes over for the final mission debriefings," she replied with a sigh. Off-camara, Thouars was teabagging Souji. "You are to head to Akihito Kanbara's residence in Nagatsuki City to deliver the next batch of gifts. This is actually a large batch because some other visitors from out of town are coming in and will also receive presents.
"How many?" asked Nodoka.
"More than five, but I don't know the exact number. After this, you should go ahead and have dinner before the stretch run. The city has plenty good places to eat, but don't do anything fancy."
"All right," Saki said. "I think I will play some country music this time."
"Let's see," Shizu said enthusiastically.
"Well I came home
Like a stone
And I fell heavy into your arms
These days of dust
Which we've known
Will blow away with this new sun
But I'll kneel down
Wait for now
And I'll kneel down
Know my ground
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
So break my step
And relent
Well you forgave and I won't forget
Know what we've seen
And him with less
Now in some ways
Shake the excess
'Cause I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
Now I'll be bold
As well as strong
And use my head alongside my heart
So tame my flesh
And fix my eyes
A tethered mind freed from the lies
And I'll kneel down
Wait for now
And I'll kneel down
Know my ground
Raise my hands
Paint my spirit gold
Bow my head
Keep my heart slow
'Cause I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you..."
One of the major consequences that came from the situation in Nagatsuki City stabilizing was that everybody was wearing glasses: whether cosmetic or prescription, everybody was wearing glasses. It was becoming a city littered with hipsters. Polluted with hipsters. It was a deliberately delicious defiler's disgrace. four D's, all sleaze. Luckily, Akihito was one of the few that went against the trend since he already was wearing contacts. He and Mirai Kuriyama were decorating the room and getting the table ready since the guests were coming in.
"I believe that a good Christmas party has a lot of decorations and decor," Akihito said. "There's a lot of people that will be coming!"
"It's a pot luck, everyone will bring something," Mirai replied. "Someone might sneak in some Jagermeister and put all of us in trouble."
"Hey you two future newlyweds, we're back," said Hiroomi Nase with his sister MItsuki, Ai Shindou, Izumi Nase, Sakura Inami, Shizuku Ninomiya and a few others. The door was open and they were all bringing in containers of food.
"Hey, everyone," Akihito said. "Come on in."
"Sorry, I forgot to close the door," Mirai said, closing the door after the guests went inside the house. "We have some new people from out of town. Care to introduce yourselves?"
They all did. "Kazumi Schlierenzauer, and I am coming to this party on behalf of Neko Kuroha, Kotori Takatori and Kana Tachibana."
"Natsume Tsuchimikado."
"RIngo KInoshita."
"Kaori Fujimiya."
"Mashiro Mitsumine."
"I am the Uka No MItama No Kami," the spirit said.
"Setsuna Ogiso."
"And you know us," said Rena. "I'm Rena Ryuuguu..."
"And I'm Rika Furude."
"Wow, what a group we have," Akihito said. "Thank you all for coming. Go ahead and chat amongst yourselves so we can get started."
The group started to introduce each other as dinner was bring prepared and break the ice with each other. 10 minutes later, the sleigh arrived. "Here's the place," Shizuno said.
"Ready?" Saki asked.
"Yep," Nodoka replied.
"Go!" A button press, and the crate dropped down.
Setsuna looked out the window. "Hey everyone, look!"
"What is it?" asked Ringo.
"I think that's a package," said Ai.
"A package?" asked Rena. "One to take home?"
"Might be some stuff for us to play with," Rika suggested.
"Nice, some clothes, maybe," said Kaori.
"Come on, let's go," said Mirai.
"This looks like a crate," Kami said.
"There's a button here," Hiroomi said. "Want me to push it, Akihito?"
"Go for it," he replied.
"Okay." The crate revealed a mountain of presents.
"Ohhhh man," Mashiro said. "Presents everywhere!"
"Nice," Sakura said. "These are some big boxes."
"Who brought these boxes here?" Izumi asked.
"It's them," Rika replied, pointing to the sleigh floating.
"Whoa," they all said.
"Hey you guys," Mirai called out to them. "Thanks for the gifts!"
"We know you have other place to go, so have a great trip!" added Natsumi.
"That's what she said!" Ai added.
"Merry Christmas all of you," Nodoka said. "Enjoy your party. Have a good night."
"Thanks a lot," said Mitsuki. "Merry Christmas from all of us."
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" said everyone on the ground, fists in the the air.
"Time for dinner!" Shizu said. "Hyaah!" They all applauded before heading back into the house to continue their party as the sleigh took its leave and headed out for dinner.
"I bet there's plenty of beer in my box," Shizuku suggested.
"And sake in mine's," added Rika. The others collectively groaned. But they would be right and all of them would suffer a hangover the next evening.
"Let's just do McDonald's this time," said Nodoka as they got off the sleigh, reverted back to their normal forms and the team went to a local McDonald's to eat as the sleigh disappeared temporarily. It was 4:30 p.m. The team, as before, ordered everything from the menu. The human reindeer did multiple runs to the soda fountain to load up on caffeine and vitamins for the final phase of the delivery.
"How's everybody doing?" asked Thours over Nodoka's headset that was also provided to her.
"We're having dinner right now at McDonald's in Nagatsuki City to reload and recharge," said Saki. "We've delivered a lot of presents already."
"Thouars, why do you have a lot of kisses on you?" asked Nodoka.
"Ladies," she said with a victorious chuckle, "I...am pregnant."
"HUH?" One of the human reindeer almost spit out his ninth Diet Coke.
"How did that happen?" asked Shizu.
"I got Kyoutarou to finally channer his inner manliness. Now, I get to learn how to be a mom,"
"Please tell Kyoutarou to take responsibility!" Nodoka cried, tears falling out of her eyes.
"Oh, he will," she said slyly. "He will..."
"Congratulations," said Shizuno. "What's our next mission."
"This one you will like."
"What is it?" asked the three of them.
"With the exception of Achiga, you get to go to all of the major schools that you have met the last several months. All of the players will be awaiting their gifts at this time."
"Wow," Saki said. "But what about the others at my house?"
"They will be the last to receive their presents, since your house, Saki, is the final destination."
"Oh."
"So do we have a list of places to go?" asked Nodoka.
"When you finish your meal," Thouars said, "get on the sleigh and we'll get started with this part of the delivery. Take your time." 20 minutes later, the team were back on the sleigh. "Did you even chew?" she deadpanned.
"Yes, we did," Saki said.
"Let's get started," said Nodoka as the sleigh took off. "So, what's our first stop."
"Nagano and Kiyosumi High School. Three people will be waiting," said Thouars.
Saki and Nodoka looked at each other. "That is...!" They wouldn't have time to take a stop by this time. This was rapid-fire, quick-strike type of delivery.
"Hmmmmm, it's too cold out here," said Yuuki Kataoka, munching on a taco outside the school. "At least I have a taco to snack on."
"Apparently, we have to wait for someone," Mako Someya said. "I wonder who..."
"Here they are," said Hisa Takei. "About time they got here." The sleigh flew by and a crate dropped down. "Ah." She pressed a button. "We got presents..."
"All right!" Yuuki said, finishing her taco before grabbing her box. "But who was on that sleigh. Was it Santa?"
Hisa took a closer look at the sleigh flying by. She knew it was Saki, Nodoka and Shizuno, but she didn't want to spoil it for them. "It was."
"Thanks, Santa," said Yuuki.
"That wasn't Santa, was it?" Mako asked Hisa through telekinesis.
"It's those two, and Shizu," Hisa replied through telekinesis. "Don't tell Yuuki."
"Heh." The three of them watched the sleigh disappear into the sky.
At that point, Maho Yumeno appeared. "Do I get a present?"
"Maho," Mako said. "Here you go." She handed her a present from the pile. "Thanks a lot for your hard work. Merry Christmas."
"Okay, Merry Christmas to you, too."
"I've always wanted to build a snowman," said Koromo Amae at Ryuumonbuchi High School, building a snowwoman and making it look like Saki. "Ahahahah! It's Saki!"
"What are you making?" asked Touka Ryuumonbuchi, peering over.
"Touka! It's Saki!"
"Saki as a snowman, huh? Well, how about a look at this?"
"Huh?" Koromo turned around.
Hajime Kunihiro was making a snowwoman version of Nodoka striking a very provocative pose. "Like it?"
"Heeeeeeeee!" Koromo's nose began to bleed.
"Nodoka," Touka said. "And her clothes are shredded." A tongue flick. "Just the way I like it."
"Not surprising, really," Tomoki Sawamura concluded.
"Anyway, why are we making snowmen and snow angels?" asked Jun Inoue, idly making a snow angel through a flat gaze.
"Because something is coming," Hajime said, watching the sleigh pass by.
Unfortunately, the crate dropped on the two snowwomen. "Noooo, my snow Saki!" Koromo wailed.
"Ah, my snow Nodocchi!" Touka cried.
"NOOOOOOOO!" they both bawled. Tomoki had to comfort them.
"What's this?" Jun asked, pressing a button. Out came five more gift boxes. "Here, Koromo, don't cry," she said, handing her a large gift box.
"Oh?" She opened it. "Ah! A Shimakaze cosplay outfit! And...a Saki dakimakura! This is even better! Hnnnnnngh!" Tears of joy.
"The dress of my online avatar," Touka said, "And a dakimakura of Nodoka in tattered clothes! Yes! Oh yes! Ahahahahahahah!"
"I supposed they feel better now," Hajime said. "I'll open mine's later."
"But who could be on the sleigh?" asked Tomoki.
"Hmmmm?" Touka had a closer look. "Ah! It's...Nodoka Haramura and Saki Miyanaga! And the monkey girl!"
"What! They ruined our snowmen of them and gave us our presents!?" Koromo exclaimed.
"Unbelievable. Tch!"
Their butler, Hagiyoshi, brought a big tray. "Tacos?" he asked. They all grabbed some."
A visual on the monitor. "Hmmmm?" asked Nodoka.
It was the two of them. "Hey, thanks for the gift, Saki-chan!" Koromo said, munching on a taco. "Oooh, this is good."
"Nodoka, I like the dakimakura you gave me," Touka said in a deep voice, and a naughty face. "Now, there is no escape!"
"!" Nodoka exclaimed.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" they both exclaimed before the screen closed.
"On to the next stop!" Shizuno said.
Mihoko Fukuji and Kana Ikeda were waiting idly at the gate for the sleigh to pass by. MIharu Yoshitome, Seika Bundou and Sumiyo Fukabori were at home and couldn't come to pick up their gifts. "Have any plans for the New Year?" Mihoko asked Kana.
"VIsiting the local temple with Hina, Nazuna and Shirona, maybe getting my face inked up," she hinted, her cat ears perking out.
"Same here, but I want Hisa to ink me in the [insert NSFW part here] and in the [insert NSFW part here]."
"Ahhhh! Too extreme! Why did you have to share that?"
"Because swagger?"
"Ugh..." Soon enough, the sleigh passed by and a crate dropped down. "Ah, here it is."
"It's them," Mihoko said as Kana pressed the button. "Thanks and Merry Christmas."
"They can't hear you, they already left. Care to help me deliver these presents to the others?" Kana asked. "Too heavy..."
"Allow me." She was able to carry all five boxes by herself. Together, they distributed the presents to they members and their coach, Takako Kubo.
At Tsuruga Academy, Momoko Touyoko was on the lookout for a certain sleigh passing by. "In about a few minutes," Momoko said, "they'll be here."
"Who?" asked Yumi Kajiki.
"Oppai-san and two others."
"Nodoka, Saki and Shizuno, it looks like," said Satomi, checking through her laptop. "Reports have suggested it's those guys."
"Oh," said Kaori Senoo.
"So that's why were have been called to wait here at the entrance," said Mutsuki Tsuyama. "Do you sense it, Momo?"
"Here they are," Momoko said. The crate dropped down. She then became invisible and pressed a button.
"Awesome, we got presents," Yumi said as she and the others received presents from the still invisible Momo.
After they received the presents, they all began to go home. Momoko reappeared and look at the passing sleigh. "Oppai-san, Merry Christmas," she said through telekinesis.
The sleigh then headed back to Tokyo to head to Shiraitodai High School. Teru was at Saki's house, but the others were waiting. "I wonder when Teru is going to come back here," Sumire Hirose said, warming her hands. "She's with Saki and I'm already missing her."
"Um," Awai said, "she's doing this because she wants to do the things sisters do, which is spend time being with each other doing the holidays."
"Is that so," Takami Shibuya. "Well, I hope we get new stuff for our mahjong room as presents,"
"I'd like to actually get some fishing lines and poles so that I can actually learn how to catch fish one day," said Seiko Matano. "There's a MMORPG that is all about fishing. It's a change of pace."
"I want new clothes," said Awai. "I want to make a pass at Shizuno Takakamo because...I'm starting to like her for a reason." They all looked at her with strange looks. "It's not what you think! Look! Here she comes!" On cue, the sleigh dropped the crate on her. "Ahhhh! Get it off me! Get it off me! Heavy!" she flailed. Sumire pressed a button, and a mountain of presents fell on top of her. "Ugh..."
"Nice presents," said Seiko. "Ah, some fishing material. Fantastic..."
"New stuff for our mahjong room," said Takami.
"Are you okay?" Sumire asked Awai, whose eyes were spiraling out.
The sleigh had long left. "St. Peter...is that you.;..?"
The next destination for the sleigh was Rinkai All-Girls School, where five girls were waiting for their gifts. "How long do we have to wait here?" asked Satoha Tsujigaito, adjusting her frames.
"Shouldn't be too long," Hao Huiyu said, eating some chow mein with chopsticks from a box
"Satoha, sandwich?" asked Nelly Virsaladze.
"Not really hungry."
"Can't survive if you're starving..." She scarfed her share down.
"I hope that one day, that Kim dynasty up north will be gone and Korea will finally be at peace with itself," said Choe Myeonghwa. "I've been blogging about Korea with a friend of mine from Malaysia that loves Korea and I've been offering my recipe for budae jjigae that involves a little consomme added to it."
"Fusion cuisine?" asked Megan Davin. "My father is currently a kitchen staff apprentice at the French Laundry and might be interested in using your recipe as a foundation for their menu."
"You know how to cook, Meg?"
"Absolutely. After we get our presents, let's head to my house and we'll all have dinner."
"Good idea," Huiyu said. "Ah, here's the sleigh."
The crate dropped down. "Oooh, presents!" Nelly said. "My box...has cash! We also received a sponsorship from House Foods!"
"Well, we should be fine for the long haul. Can you see the sleigh?"
"I see a light..." said Megan. "They pretty much took off."
"I wonder who was in that sleigh," said Satoha as the others picked up their gifts and headed to Megan's house for dinner.
It took the team 45 minutes to fly over to Eisui All-Girls School in Kagoshima Prefecture from Tokyo. At a room inside the campus, the five members of the team—Tomoe Kanjuku, Haru Takimi, Hatsumi Usuzumi, Kasumi Iwato and Komaki Jindai—were meditating by the fire in their shrine maiden uniforms, reflecting quietly on a long year of competition and of study and enlightenment. In deference to the sacredness of the place, the sleigh slowly eased into the campus before the crate dropped.
A flicker of the flames. "Hatsumi," Komaki said. "Go after it."
"Right!" She ran off and saw a crate before returning to the others. "It is here," she said.
They all walked to the crate, with Kasumi pushing the button. Each of the members picked up their gift box. Looking up at the sleigh, they all bowed before returning to their meditation room. The three girls and the human reindeer bowed as well before the sleigh went to its next destination.
Normally, the next stop would be the campus of Senriyama Girl's High School in North Osaka, but a detour forced the sleigh to head to the home of Ryuuka Shimizudani, where she, Toki Onjouji, Izumi Nijou and Sera Eguchi were staying. Hiroko Funakubo, being related to the Atago family, was staying with Hiroe, Kinue, her aunt Masae and the other members of the Himematsu team for dinner.
"Ryuuka...Ryuuka...all I want for Christmas...is you..." Toki said with a lustful his, savoring her already undressed body.
"I feel the same way," she replied, stroking her sculpted back, her nipples getting dangerously erect.
"Why are you filming Toki and Ryuuka consummating?" asked Izumi, playing FIFA 15 as Eintracht Frankfurt to get a change of pace during the holidays. In the kitchen, the turkey was being rotated slowly on the automatic rotisserie, smug as the chicken from Humanity Has Declined.
"Because Instagram, Vine and YouTube's perverted male viewership need to get off like Foxy," Sera said, coming in closer to watch them grind.
"Who are they?"
The song played, causing Toki and Ryuuka to ratchet up their lovemaking. "Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oooooooooh!"
"Oh."
Sera looked out the window. "I think there's a crate outside."
Toki's eyes lit up. "It has arrived. Our presents. On schedule."
"Presents?" Ryuuka blinked. "Hey, Toki, don't go out like that in the cold!" She was only in her long nightshirt, slightly unbuttoned. Toki sneezed and fell to her knees, hyperventilating. "Toki? TOKI!"
Toki looked up and looked like how she was when Teru gave her the love a while back. "I'm sorry, I was a bit rash."
"Toki...Toki!" Ryuuka sobbed, embracing her as Izumi and Sera brought the presents inside and the sleigh took off. Ryuuka princess-carried Toki back inside.
"Hmmm, it says I need to place Toki's present here," said Sera. "And I need to press...this button." The gift box turned into a endless Coke dispenser machine. "Hmmm..." A button press, and a large cup of Coke Zero was made.
Sera looked and decided to give the cup to Ryuuka. "Have Toki drink this," she said.
"What do you mean? How is that going to work!?"
"Just do it."
Ryuuka placed the straw to Toki's lips and she took a sip. Her empty eyes went back to normal and she delivered a catlike smike. "!"
"Gotcha, Ryuuka."
"You mean, you deliberately faked your own demise on purpose!? Toki!"
"I like soft drinks, especially Coke." A kiss. "Ryuuka, Merry Christmas, love. Merry Christmas everyone."
"Merry Christmas to you too, TokI! Please don't do that again!" Ryuuka bawled as the others had a group hug. "Toki! I LOVE YOU!"
"So I wanted to share this one joke with you guys," said Hiroe to Kinue, Hiroko, Masae, Kyouko Suehara and Yuuko Mase. "A man walks into a bar and orders a beer then looks into his pocket. He does this over and over again. Finally, the bartender asks why he orders a beer and after drinking it he looks into his pocket. The man responded, I have a picture of my wife in there and when she starts to look good then i'll go home."
"Sis, that joke sucked," Kinue replied.
"Shut up, you ain't seen nothing yet!" Masae, Hiroko and Kyouko were busy setting up the dinner table while Yuuko was playing The Battle Pentagram on her PSVITA, fighting as Mami Tomoe in her bikini. "Here's another one. A man, whose level of drunkenness was bordering on the absurd, stood up to leave a bar and fell flat on his face. 'Maybe all I need is some fresh air,' thought the man as he crawled outside. So he tried to stand up again but fell face first into the mud. 'Screw it,' he thought. 'I'll just crawl home.' The next morning, his wife found him on the doorstep asleep. 'You went out drinking last night, didn't you?' she said. 'Uh, yes,' he said sheepishly. 'How did you know?' She says, 'You left your wheelchair at the bar again.'"
"Typical of the Retard Master," Yuuko muttered, masturbating to Mami's moves.
"And I schooled your retarded asses! Ho ho ho! Cop that!"
"Night is young, Hiroe," Masae said. "Hiroko, put this here."
"Okay," she said, placing the sukiyaki pot on the table. She looked out the window. "Heheheh, they're here."
"Who? Who dey?" asked Hiroe. They left the house to see the crate parachute down. "Oy, what's this box doing here."
"The sleigh dropped it, sister," Kinue said, pressing a button before stepping aside, adjusting her frames.
"Whoa, oh yes, praise be to the idiots running our government, we have gifts! Woooooo!" Hiroe exclaimed, jumping up and down like an idiot before grabbing her box. "MERRY CHRISTMAS! AWWWWWWW YEEEEAAAAAH!" And she made a dash for the house before Kinue tripped her as she went in. "Ow! Ow! Ow!" The others were gentle walking over her as they made their way inside, except for Masae, who picked her up. "Mom, why me?" she cried with a pout.
"It's okay," she said. "Let's go it."
"One of these days, Saki Miyanaga, one of these days..." Hiroe cried as she was dragged back to the house through her crocodile tears.
The next stop for the girls was Iwate prefecture and Miyamori Girl's High School. The five girls, Shiromi Kosegawa, Aislinn Wishart, Kurumi Kakura, Sae Usuzawa and Toyone Anetai, were busy watching some rugby matches via cable in the mahjong room, watching a replay between Wasps and London Irish. Aislinn was finally able to learn Japanese, but to make things better, the others had a solid command of English. "In New Zealand," Aislinn said, "we play this game a lot,"
"Rugby is pretty popular in Japan, too, since we're the best Asian rugby nation out there," Shiromi said. "Not as popular as baseball or soccer."
"Or mahjong," added Kurumi. "There is no escaaaaape!"
"Is that turning into your new catchphrase?" asked Sae.
"Confidence builder."
"Whatever allows you to wake up tomorrow, AIslinn," Toyone concluded. "One sided match, though. Wasps are pretty good. Hey, another try."
The door opened. "Ladies," said Toshi Kumakura, "head outside. There's a package."
The sleigh had already left when the girls arrived. "Whoa," Kurumi said. "We got presents."
"And in New Zealand, it's a nice time to head to the beach," Aislinn said.
"Who's your favorite rugby team out there?" asked Sae as they went back to the room, carrying their boxes.
"If I were to pick one...I would say Chiefs."
The next stop for the sleigh was Shindouji Girl's High, in Fukuoka. Like MIyamori, their mahjong room had an HDTV for watching sports and other pop culture shows, and late-night anime shows, including the very ecchi ones. "Christmas is a very Subara celebration!" Kirame Hanada proclaimed. Subara meant "Marvelous!" "The songs are Subara; the baby Jesus is Subara; Santa Claus, Rudolph and Frosty are Subara; Black Pete and his whip of love is Subara; even the Grinch is Subara Desu!"
"The Grinch?" asked HImeko Tsuruta. "Do you know who the Grinch is?"
"He's a real bro, Himeko! He's what makes Christmas Subara! As well as the food, the music, the shopping, the anime illustrations..."
"Truly into the Christmas spirit," said Mairu Shirouzu, Himeko's partner.
"I don't like this idiot from No Game No Life," said Hitomi Ezaki. "Sora."
"Ewwww, this person is trying to peep into a bathroom with a device?" asked Yoshiko Yasakouchi. "Change the channel."
Kirame changed the channel. "How about this?" But instead of a screen showing up, the lights shown on Haruka Takayama and Yuu Sonoda, two girls from out of town, making love in the mahjong room. "Subara Desu!"
"What are you two doing here?" Himeko asked.
"I invited them so that they could learn about the basics of mahjong and perhaps have the fortitude to play it online when they head back home," Kirame said.
"Nice," Yoshiko said.
"Haruka! Haruka! Hyaaaaah!" Yuu cried, feeling her juices flowing. Mairu's nose began to bleed.
"I think I see some gifts outside," Hitomi said. "Be right back." 10 minutes later, she returned with boxes.. "Presents. Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas," said the other members of the team.
KIrame left the gifts for Haruka and Yuu next to them, and they were still consummating. "Try not to be too loud," Kirame said. "Merry Christmas." She and the others went back to watching more anime.
Afterwards, the sleigh then made two cross country stopovers: leaving presents at Usuzan High School in South Hokkaido for the team of Naruka Motouchi, Chikako Himori, Yuan Iwadate, Sawaya Shishihara, and Maya Yukino; Kentani High School in Hyogo Prefecture for the team of Miyuki Tsubakino, Sumiko Yorifuji, Kozue Furuzaka, Yuuka Morigaki and Riko Yasufuku; Koshigaya Girl's High School for the team of Sophia Arai, Hanako Asami, Shiori Mizumura, Tamago Utsugi and Keiko Yagihara; Sukoya Kokaji's house, where presents were being delivered for Sukoya, Yasuko Fujita, Kouko Fukuyo, Eri Hariu and Uta Mihorogi; Hirataki High School in Nagano for Kazue Nanpo and Sangamaki High in North Osaki for Kei Arakawa.
"Marvelous job," said Thouars, clapping her hands. "You have completed the Saki Ballroom Blitz portion of the delivery today."
Saki, Shizuno and Nodoka were exchanging high fives. "So is that it?" asked Shizu.
"Not quite. Your next stop is perhaps the most important one, aside from your meeting with the event organizers."
"What is it?" asked Nodoka.
"Have you been to the twin cities of Mitakihara and Kazamino?"
"That...that's Madoka Kaname's place!"
"Yes, this is Madoka's hometown. And what I will reveal to you is that she is the one that arranged this delivery that you are doing."
"Oh my..."
"So what Madoka wants you to do is deliver presents to every building, every residence, every street and family. No one will come from Christmas in Mitakihara and Kazamino without something to be happy about because she loves this city. It's time for you to head out there and deliver her final gifts to the place that calls home. The sleigh is programmed to cover the city limits and deliver presents within three hours. You don't have to do anything: once you reach Kazamino, press this picture." She pointed to the picture showing up.
"Is this...Madoka and Homura Akemi?" asked Saki Miyanaga.
"They are the guardians of this city. They will not be in the city, though, they will be somewhere else. You will find out. When this picture shows up, all of you have to touch it, and the delivery will begin. Just sit back and relax and reflect and eat and drink if you want. It's just like a flight or riding on a blimp."
"Wow," Shizu said. "Let's do it!" Thouars smiled as the sleigh went to Kasamino City.
20 minutes later, the sleigh entered the city limits. The visual of the Ultimate Madoka and the Akuma Homura embracing showed up.
"Ready?" Saki asked. "1, 2, 3!" The three girls touched it, and the three-hour delivery of the gifts to the cities of Kazamino and Mitakihara began. Gift boxes, statues, monuments and other presents parachuted down.
"Time for a song," Shizuno said. The screens in the skyscrapers in the twin cities were showing important scenes from all of the shows and movies that took place from July 2013 through June of 2014. Soon, the three of them were having a good idea why they were handing out all these presents.
"I fell between the lines, made you surrender
The promise at the start, just got lost on the way
Held eternity, gazed at the splendour
Give up all these simple games that we hold on too
Now our victory march is struck with charm
I can bear the tears upon my arm
Now our victory march is struck with charm
We can keep the spirit safe from harm
Rise from the ash in darkness
The Phoenix alive, the phoenix alive
Turn bones to constellations
The stars in our eyes, stars in our eyes
We tore ourselves apart, all the indifference
Rewrite the empty lines of the illusions we had
Repeat a million times to aid the persistence
This will be our last chance that we hold on too
Now our victory march is struck with charm
I can bear the tears upon my arm
Now our victory march is struck with charm
We can keep the spirit safe from harm
Rise from the ash in darkness
The Phoenix alive, the phoenix alive
Turn bones to constellations
The stars in our eyes, stars in our eyes
Bed's angry voice still in your hair, still in the air
Hear your victory march but your tears they fall on my arms..."
"Nice song," Nodoka said. "Can I go next?" Below, fireworks were going off, and thousands of dancers and revelers were cheering as the sleigh however over them. They waved to the crowd as the delivery went on.
"Go for it," Shizu said.
"Okay. Let's do...this." The fireworks were also going out in full force, accompanying the sleigh, whose human reindeer were moving in sync to the music. At the Nissan Stadium in Yokohama where a concert dedicated to this delivery and Saimoe Prime Minister general election was going on, Daft Punk was also playing live with Pharrell Williams. Scenes of the concert on the screen were juxtaposed with moments from the 2013-14 anime season and the sleigh with the three girls, as well as a results marquee from the many matches that took place during the election process, as well as exit polls. NHK was broadcasting this live with MIkoto Mikoshiba and Chiyo Sakura.
"Like the legend of the Phoenix
All ends with beginnings
What keeps the planets spinning (uh)
The force from the beginning
(Look)
We've come too far to give up who we are
So let's raise the bar and our cups to the stars
She's up all night to the sun
I'm up all night to get some
She's up all night for good fun
I'm up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to the sun
We're up all night to get some
We're up all night for good fun
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
The present has no ribbon
Your gift keeps on giving,
What is this I'm feeling?
If you wanna leave I'm with it (ah)
We've come too far to give up who we are
So let's raise the bar and our cups to the stars
She's up all night to the sun
I'm up all night to get some
She's up all night for good fun
I'm up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to the sun
We're up all night to get some
We're up all night for good fun
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
(We're up all night to get
We're up all night to get
We're up all night to get
We're up all night to get)
(We're up all night to get (together)
We're up all night to get (let's get funked again)
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky)
(We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky)
(We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky)
We've (we're up all night to get lucky)
Come too far (we're up all night to get lucky)
To give up (we're up all night to get lucky)
Who we are (we're up all night to get lucky)
So let's (we're up all night to get lucky)
Raise the bar (we're up all night to get lucky)
And our cups (we're up all night to get lucky)
To the stars (we're up all night to get lucky)
She's up all night to the sun
I'm up all night to get some
She's up all night for good fun
I'm up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to the sun
We're up all night to get some
We're up all night for good fun
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky
We're up all night to get lucky..."
"I know you don't get a chance to take a break this often
I know your life is speeding and it isn't stopping
Here take my shirt and just go ahead and wipe up all the
Sweat, sweat, sweat
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
Lose yourself to dance
I know you don't get a chance to take a break this often
I know your life is speeding and it isn't stopping
Here take my shirt and just go ahead and wipe up all the
Sweat, sweat, sweat
Lose yourself to dance (come on)
Lose yourself to dance (at all)
Everybody dancing on the floor
Getting you ready for some more
Everybody on the floor
Yeah, come on
I know you don't get a chance to take a break this often
I know your life is speeding and it isn't stopping
Here take my shirt and just go ahead and wipe up all the
Sweat, sweat, sweat
Lose yourself to dance (come on)
Lose yourself to dance (at all)
Everybody dancing on the floor
Getting you ready for some more
Everybody on the floor
Yeah, come on..."
"And as you can see below us," said Mikoto as the nationally-televised broadcast continued, "the crowd below is jumping and jiving to the music here at the Nissan Stadium to the strains of Daft Punk. This is the 2channel Anime Saimoe Election Night 2014 here on NHK, I'm Mikoto Mikoshiba and this is Chiyo Sakura with me. What an evening we're gonna have, as we will welcome the 14th Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan. Chiyo, your thoughts on this?"
"Everyone was mulling as to whether or not the Saki Party would finally get a second term at the Saimoe leadership, but this is the year that the power will swing back to the favor of the favorites. The only question is who will be the leader of the Japanese Saimoe Diet: will it be Nodoka Haramura or will it be Saki Miyanaga? The loser of this race will become the deputy Saimoe Prime Minister by agreement."
"Spare a thought for the voters for Homura Akemi," Mikoto said. "The Puella Magi Party felt she was going to have a chance to finally make a difference, but she will only finish fifth place in the competition, which is her best-ever, but the will of Japan's voters is to elect the Saki Party to power for the 2015 session."
"Absolutely, but the fact that the last four years including this year have made the Saimoe Diet a two-party system has disillusioned future voters into participating next year, but since neither party will be eligible, you have to wonder if the Kancolle Party—which is being organized right now by the party's president, Akagi, to submit their paperwork—will be the successor to the Saki Party in terms of leverage."
"Next year is going to definitely be wide-open in terms of the field. It may be a power vacuum, but this is what makes Saimoe exciting. You never know who might just make waves in 2015. The future of the race to be Saimoe Prime Minister and. in turn, an assistant to Princess Aiko, just might be brighter than we would normally imagine to think."
On stage, musical legend Ryan Tedder and his band OneRepublic played, accompanied by a bunch of traditional drummers and martial arts dancers. Flags of every series that participated in the 2channel Anime Saimoe Tournament 2014 waved in the air.
"Lately I been, I been losing sleep
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be counting stars
Yeah, we'll be counting stars
I see this life
Like a swinging vine
Swing my heart across the line
In my face is flashing signs
Seek it out and ye shall find
Old, but I'm not that old
Young, but I'm not that bold
And I don't think the world is sold
I'm just doing what we're told
I feel something so right
By doing the wrong thing
And I feel something so wrong
By doing the right thing
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie
Everything that kills me makes me feel alive
Lately I been, I been losing sleep (hey!)
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard (hey!)
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be counting stars
Lately I been, I been losing sleep (hey!)
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard (hey!)
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be, we'll be counting stars
I feel the love
And I feel it burn
Down this river every turn
Hope is our four letter word
Make that money
Watch it burn
Old, but I'm not that old
Young, but I'm not that bold
And I don't think the world is sold
I'm just doing what we're told
And I feel something so wrong
By doing the right thing
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie
Everything that drowns me makes me wanna fly
Lately I been, I been losing sleep (hey!)
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be counting stars
Lately I been, I been losing sleep (hey!)
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard (hey!)
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be, we'll be counting stars
Oh, oh, oh.
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Everything that kills me...
makes me feel alive
Lately I been, I been losing sleep (hey!)
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard (hey!)
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be counting stars
Lately I been, I been losing sleep
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard
Said no more counting dollars
We'll be, we'll be counting stars
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned
Take that money
Watch it burn
Sink in the river
The lessons I learned..."
"Look at the crowds of people below us," Nodoka said, holding Saki tight, smiling. "This is amazing..."
"I know, right? My guess," she said as Shizuno waved to the crowd and blew kisses while the gifts continued to drop, "is that we are on the verge of history."
"What history?" Saki whispered in her ear. "Heh. Just as planned."
"About time, too." They shared a long embrace. They knew something historic would happen hours from now. There was a crowd of 50,000 inside the Nissan Stadium.
"I'll be your light, your match, your burning sun,
I'll be the bright, in black that's makin' you run.
And we'll feel alright, and we'll feel alright,
'Cause we'll work it out, yeah, we'll work it out.
I'll be doin' this, if you had a doubt,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
I'll be your ghost, your game, your stadium.
I'll be your fifty-thousand clapping like one.
And I feel alright, and I feel alright,
'Cause I worked it out, yeah, I worked it out.
I'll be doin' this, if you had a doubt,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
I got my mind made up, man, I can't let go.
I'm killing every second 'til it saves my soul.
(Ooh) I'll be running, (Ooh) I'll be running,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
And we'll start a fire, and we'll shut it down,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
There's a maniac out in front of me.
Got an angel on my shoulder, and Mestopheles.
but mama raised me good, mama raised me right.
Mama said, "Do what you want, say prayers at night,"
And I'm saying them, 'cause I'm so devout.
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out, yeah.
I got my mind made up, man, I can't let go.
I'm killing every second 'til it saves my soul.
(Ooh) I'll be running, (Ooh) I'll be running,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
And we'll start a fire, and we'll shut it down,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
Oh, we all want the same thing.
Oh, we all run for something.
run for God, for fate,
For love, for hate,
For gold, for rust,
For diamonds, for dust.
I'll be your light, your match, your burning sun,
I'll be the bright, in black that's makin' you run.
I got my mind made up, man, I can't let go.
I'm killing every second 'til it saves my soul.
(Ooh) I'll be running, (Ooh) I'll be running,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
And we'll start a fire, and we'll shut it down,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
I'll be your light, your match, your burning sun,
I'll be the bright, in black that's makin' you run.
And we'll feel alright, and we'll feel alright,
'Cause we'll work it out, yes, we'll work it out.
And we'll start a fire, and we'll shut it down,
'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out.
'Til the love runs out."
"I've been seeing all these different shows, and even highlights of you at work, Saki," Nodoka said. "So cool..."
"Memories, that," she replied. "When I relive all this, I feel like I am full of energy. I get so much energy when I am filled with your love."
"Jeez, can you hold it in until we get to bed?"
Shizuno turned to the two of them who were looking into each other's eyes in a miko embrace. "The ceiling can't hold us," she snarked. "We spread it across the country!" A few piano notes, and the next song began. Some mosh pits were forming in the crowd.
"Ay, ay, ay
Good to see you, come on in, let's go
Yeah, let's go
Alright, alright
OK, uh, alright, OK
Alright, OK
Return of the Mack, get up!
What it is, what it does, what it is, what it isn't.
Looking for a better way to get up out of bed
Instead of getting on the Internet and checking a new hit
Get up! Fresh out, pimp strut walking, little bit of humble, little bit of cautious
Somewhere between like Rocky and Cosby. Sweater gang, nope, nope y'all can't copy
Yup. Bad, moon walking, this here is our party, my posse's been on Broadway,
And we did it our way.
Grown music, I shed my skin and put my bones into everything I record to it
And yet I'm on.
Let that stage light go and shine on down,
Got that Bob Barker suit game and plinko in my style.
Money, stay on my craft and stick around for those pounds,
But I do that to pass the torch and put on for my town
Trust me. On my I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T shit hustler,
Chasing dreams since I was fourteen with the four track bussing
Halfway cross that city with the backpack, fat cat, crushing
Labels out here,
Now they can't tell me nothing
We give that to the people,
Spread it across the country
Labels out here,
Now they can't tell me nothing
We give it to the people,
Spread it across the country
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us
Now, can I kick it? Thank you. Yeah I'm so damn grateful.
I grew up, really wanted gold fronts
But that's what you get when Wu Tang raised you
Y'all can't stop me, go hard like I got an 808 in my heart beat
And I'm eating at the beat like you gave a little speed to a great white shark on shark week
Raw. Tell me go up. Gone!
Deuces goodbye. I got a world to see, and my girl she wanna see Rome,
Caesar make you a believer. Now I never ever did it for a throne.
That validation comes from giving it back to the people. Now sing this song and it goes like
Raise those hands, this is our party
We came here to live life like nobody was watching
I got my city right behind me
If I fall, they got me. Learn from that failure gain humility and then we keep marching ourselves
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us
And so we put our hands up
And so we put our hands up
Wa oh oh oh wa oh oh oh wa oh oh
Let's go!
Na na na na na na na na (aha)
Hey
And all my people say
Na na na na na na na na (that's right, feels good)
Hey
And all my people say
Na na na na na na na na (it's alright)
(oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh)
And all my people say
Na na na na na na na na
Ma-ckle-more
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us
Can we go back, this is the moment
Tonight is the night, we'll fight 'til it's over
So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us
Like the ceiling can't hold us!"
"We interviewed a number of random people at this stadium to ask who their favorite Kancolle ship is," said Chiyo on the broadcast. "Here they are."
The answers from a sample of anons. To protect the innocent and the insane, the names were not disclosed. "I like Akagi."
"Kaga. Gotta go with Kaga."
"Shimakaze! The most awesome outfit, period!"
"Kongou. Gotta go with Kongou."
"Arashio and Asashio."
"Inazuma and her sister ship, I forget the name."
"Yamato. Going with the original."
"Haruna is the most obedient ship out there."
"Fubuki, because she's the main lead in the show next winter!"
"Honestly, nobody decided to pick Tenryuu? My word. That's my choice!"
"Tone. Most underrated ship of the fleet."
"Shigure. Because of the hair."
"Akashi for me! Because I like pink hair and green eyes."
"Kiyoshimo. The end."
"Kongou. Everyone knows that's all about Kongou."
"I'll go with Hiei. I like girls that looks like boys."
"Mamiya. I like coffeehouses."
"Amatsukaze. She's mine."
"Inazuma and Ikazuchi!"
"Um...Kongou's the only one I care about, so I'll go with her."
"Any ship voiced by Nao Toyama is all for me! For ME! AHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"And there you have it," said Chiyo. "A small sample of people. We couldn't fit everyone in due to time purposes but by consensus, I think I like Kongou's chances of doing well next year, what do you think?"
"You never know," said Mikoto. "But her mix of English and Japanese makes her look like Karen Kujou, who finished in the top 16 of the race for the office this year."
"Speaking of which, we have Karen on the line with us tonight," Chiyo said. "Karen, good evening."
Broken English time. "Good evening, national TV audience on NHK! I'm Karen! Nice to meet you!"
"Good evening to you, where are you at?"
In Japanese. "At Shinobu Oomiya's house, having dinner with Alice, Youko, Shinobu, Aya and Isami." Back to Engrish. "Delicious, tasty set meal!" And back to Japanese. "At a very affordable price."
Chiyo let out a hesitant laugh. "What do you think of the final so far."
"Well, I think we had a very good campaign. Alice and I did well to finish top 16 but Saki and Madoka are too strong so we could only be a third party to everything." Back to English. "Too bad. Japan..." And now to Japanese, "...missed the boat, big time. All is fair in love and Saimoe." She repeated that phrase in English.
"Very true. So who do you think is going to win?"
"Nodocchi will win because..." From Japanese to English. "Her chest is the best pillow for lewd boys!"
"You know she's lesbian, right?" Mikoto snarked.
"Does that make her a sacred cow?" she asked in Japanese.
"Ugh..."
"Well, I can say that you've made your mind as to who will win this thing," Chiyo said. "Any message you want to give to the fans in attendance or people watching on television?"
"Thank you for your support and have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year." Back to English and a Kongou pose. "Peace around the world! YES! Burning...LOVE!"
"Have a good night, Karen," said Chiyo. "That's Karen Kujou with us on Election Night 2014 here at Nissan Stadium."
"It's going down, I'm yelling timber
You better move, you better dance
Let's make a night, you won't remember
I'll be the one, you won't forget
wooooo oooooh
The bigger they are, the harder they fall
This biggity boy's a diggity dog
I have them like Miley Cyrus,
clothes off twerking with my
bras and thongs, timber
Face down, booty up, timber
That's the way we like the war, timber
I'm slicker than an oil spill
She say she won't, but I bet she will, timber
Swing your partner round and round
End of the night, it's going down
One more shot, another round
End of the night, it's going down
Swing your partner round and round
End of the night, it's going down
One more shot, another round
End of the night, it's going down
It's going down, I'm yelling timber
You better move, you better dance
Let's make a night, you won't remember
I'll be the one, you won't forget
It's going down (It's going down)
I'm yelling timber
You better move (You better move)
You better dance (You better dance)
Let's make a night
You won't remember
I'll be the one
You won't forget (You won't forget)
ooooh
Look up in the sky, it's a bird, it's a plane
Nah, it's just me, ain't a damn thing changed
Live in hotels, swing on plane
Blessed to say, money ain't a thing
Club jumping like Lebron, now, Voli
Order me another round, homie
We about to climb, wild, 'cause it's about to go down
Swing your partner round and round
End of the night, it's going down
One more shot, another round
End of the night, it's going down
Swing your partner round and round
End of the night, it's going down
Ooooh
One more shot, another round
End of the night, it's going down
It's going down, I'm yelling timber
You better move, you better dance
Let's make a night, you won't remember
I'll be the one, you won't forget (you won't forget)
It's going down (It's going down)
I'm yelling timber
You better move
You better dance (You better dance)
Let's make a night (Let's make a night)
You won't remember
I'll be the one (I'll be the one)
You won't forget (You won't forget)..."
"Hey," asked Shizuno to Thouars back on the sleigh as its cruised around Mitakihara to continue its mass distribution of presents. "Is it possible for me to stand on the orb containing the gifts and dance?"
"Yes," she said.
"Hey!" Nodoka said. "Shizu might fall to her death!"
"Don't worry," Thouars said. "The shoes that you all wear will allow you to stand on the orb and dance the night away."
"Really?" asked Saki. Soon enough, the three of them were on top of the orb. "Ahh, it's so breezy!" she said. A few hitched sighs later. "I feel...like dancing."
"Same here," Nodoka said, holding hands with Saki.
Shizuno was fired. "Music...START!" The girls were dancing, the people were dancing, everyone was dancing to King Kong and d. Jungle Girls. Even Chiyo and Mikoto and the producers of the broadcast.
"It's thriller, darling
You're a wonderful lover, baby
(Ay, iyaiyaiyai)
July, December
Always deep inside of my mind
Tell me why (Ay, iyaiyai)
You keep a pocketful of green green dollars
I love you though it's the time
You're very hard
You sound like a young fella
Take me on the night
Boom boom boom boom
Shoot you like a bambar
Boom boom boom boom
At your order
Boom boom boom boom
Pushing all the buttons
More time
Don't like a tango
Dancin' your fandango tonight, baby
(Ay, iyaiyaiyai)
We'll meet tomorrow
Boom boom never slows for you, baby
(Ay, iyaiyaiyai) ]
You pretty doll you like me like tha dollars
Oh baby this is the time
So you can buy the world like Rockefella'
Dance with me tonight
Boom boom boom boom
Shoot you like a bambar
Boom boom boom boom
At your order
Boom boom boom boom
Pushing all the buttons
More time
Boom boom boom boom
Shoot you like a bambar
Boom boom boom boom
At your order
Boom boom boom boom
Pushing all the buttons
More time..."
The three girls got back on the front of the sleigh and noticed that they were close to finally completing the delivery of all the presents to all the businesses and families in Mitakihara City. "I think we have time for one more song for this city," Nodoka said.
"Bruce Hornsby," Saki said.
"Play it," said Shizuno. The song played before the sleigh finally left Mitakihara and began its flight to the Nissan Stadium in Yokohama, to the roar of the waving crowds below.
"Standing in line, marking time
Waiting for the welfare dime
'Cause they can't buy a job
The man in the silk suit hurries by
As he catches the poor old lady's eyes
Just for fun he says, "Get a job."
That's just the way it is
Some things will never change
That's just the way it is
Ah, but don't you believe them
Said hey, little boy, you can't go where the others go
'Cause you don't look like they do
Said hey, old man, how can you stand to think that way?
And did you really think about it before you made the rules?
He said, son
That's just the way it is
Some things will never change
That's just the way it is
Ah, but don't you believe them, yeah
That's just the way it is
That's just the way it is
Well, they passed a law in '64
To give those who ain't got a little more
But it only goes so far
'Cause the law don't change another's mind
When all it sees at the hiring time
Is the line on the color bar, no
That's just the way it is
Some things will never change
That's just the way it is
That's just the way it is, it is, it is, it is..."
"Congratulations, you have almost finished giving away all of the presents for this Christmas," said Thouars. "I am so proud of all of you."
"Our pleasure," said Nodoka. "It's been a long night, a really productive day. We visited so many important people and felt the highs and lows of sharing the Christmas spirit.
"It was really fun," said Saki.
"So, I guess we all know what's next," said Shizuno.
"Yep, you're on your way to Nissan Stadium," Thouars said. "Six girls will be awaiting you, including Madoka Kaname. They are the ones who have assigned you this day-long trip." You will have time to pick one song before the sleigh heads down here. Also, by passing by Mitakihara, you have already given them their presents, so you won't have to hand anything out.
"Awesome," Saki said.
"Thank you again. Go there now."
"What song should we play."
"Let's do this," Nodoka said. At the Nissan Stadium, scenes of Saki, Shizuno and Nodoka visiting all the different places were displayed along with them currently on the sleigh as the audience waved white lilies of victory and yuri solidarity, an important tenet of the Saki Party alongside the promotion of East Asian Strength and riichi mahjong as "a sport for all people." All of Tokyo and Yokohama was awash in fireworks as the sleigh approached the stadium. There were a number of other guests who were listed among the VIPs and were watching the concert and victory ceremony, including Escha Mailer, Manaka Mukaido, Chisaki Hiradaira, Tamako Kitashirakawa, Enju Aihara, Tina Sprout, Satsuki Kiryuuin and Ryuuko Matoi.
"Remember when the days were long
And rolled beneath a deep blue sky
Didn't have a care in the world
With mommy and daddy standin' by
But "happily ever after" fails
And we've been poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers dwell on small details
Since daddy had to fly
But I know a place where we can go
That's still untouched by men
We'll sit and watch the clouds roll by
And the tall grass wave in the wind
You can lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence
O' beautiful, for spacious skies
But now those skies are threatening
They're beating plowshares into swords
For this tired old man that we elected king
Armchair warriors often fail
And we've been poisoned by these fairy tales
The lawyers clean up all details
Since daddy had to lie
But I know a place where we can go
And wash away this sin
We'll sit and watch the clouds roll by
And the tall grass wave in the wind
Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair spill all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence
Who knows how long this will last
Now we've come so far, so fast
But, somewhere back there in the dust
That same small town in each of us
I need to remember this
So baby give me just one kiss
And let me take a long last look
Before we say goodbye
Just lay your head back on the ground
And let your hair fall all around me
Offer up your best defense
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence..."
As the number finished, the sleigh arrived on the parking lot, where a number of media were waiting, as well as the Puella Magi Holy Quintet and Nagisa Momoe, who was eating a block of Dubliner. "They're here," she said.
"Finally," Sayaka Miki said. "Took them a while."
"Sayaka," Kyouko Sakura said, "they've been at this since 11 p.m. last night, so they already have been up for a day.
"That's true," Mami Tomoe said. "I wonder if they are really tired or if the magic in the sleigh is waking them up."
"I lost to someone worthy," Homura said in her goddess uniform. And she wasn't wearing any underwear underneath, like Madoka in her ultimate outfit. "At least I finished fifth and I will always have Korea."
"This was a successful mission," Madoka said. "And they arrived on schedule. Let's go."
"Right!" the Puella Magi said, walking over to them.
"Hey, we are here," said Shizuno, walking over to them.
Madoka clapped her hands. "You've finally made it," she said. "Congratulations."
"So, why are we here?" asked Saki.
"You have been assigned to give Christmas presents to everyone on our list because one of you has been picked to succeed me as Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan."
"Who is that?" Nodoka asked.
Madoka went over to her. "Nodoka Haramura, I am picking you to become the 14th Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan. Do you accept?"
Nodoka ran over to her and embraced her. Her Christmas petticoat came off and she was now in her Nodocchi outfit. "I do!" The tears fell out, and she was sobbing.
"It's okay, let it out," Madoka said, petting her head and stroking her wings. "It's over, you've done it."
"I've fallen short so many times...so many times," she cried. "This was my last chance to lead this country because it needs us. It needs me. I want to make Japan happy. I want to make Japan proud. It's like a burden is now off my shoulders! I'm so happy I could fly!" Nodoka closed her eyes and smiled, her warmth also causing Madoka to shed a few tears.
"I knew I made the right decision, because you wanted this more than anyone. You will now have to assist a number of important people in this country and be a leading figurehead in all things moe. You're capable and with Saki-chan with you, you'll be unstoppable."
Nodoka looked into Madoka's eyes one more time, then embraced her again before walking over to Saki to hold her hand. "We'll do our best to make you proud," she said. "Thank you for finally giving me the chance I always wanted."
"You're welcome," Madoka said. "And Saki Miyanaga."
"Yes?"
"You will assist her as her equal," she added.
"Me?"
"Correct. Your bond is so strong, it must be shared across the world. Nodoka will lead the way in name, but it's you two who will work together to accomplish the goals you set out to do. I think you will both do an amazing job."
"Okay, we'll do our best," Saki said.
"Good luck. And may we will meet again someday." The Holy Quintet and Nagisa reverted to their casual forms before they walked away.
"Ms. Nodoka, Ms. Saki and Ms. Shizuno, follow me," said an official, giving them credentials to enter the stadium. They followed him.
"So now what?" Sayaka asked as the six girls left Nissan Stadium, hands behind her back. "What a bad trip this has been, but our year was last year so oh well."
"There's a restaurant near here where we can eat some beef bowls," Homura said.
"Since Sayaka finished the highest of all of us," Kyouko said, "she's footing the bill tonight. Nobody likes Sayaka anyway. That's why the voters deserted her: Sayaka is very foolish!"
"Kyouko, stop it, stop it you!" she shot back, blushing though she was, in fact, a very guilty love partner of Kyouko. They all had a laugh and chatted amongst themselves as they headed to a nearby Yoshinoya.
The strains of Saki's original anthem, "Glossy MMM," were playing as more fireworks broke out and the three girls made their way to the stage to a standing ovation. Signs were in the air of, "WE'VE DONE IT!", "WE MADE HISTORY!" "NODOCCHI VICTORIOUS!" "JAPAN IS SAVED!" "MADOKA OUT! NODOKA IN!" and "SAKI X NODOKA = IMMORTAL MAHJONG GUARDIANS OF JAPAN!" were among the banners placed. As the song ended, chants of "NODOCCHI! NODOCCHI! NODOCCHI!" were ringing among the crowd.
As Saki and Shizuno took their seats on either side of Nodoka, who took the podium with Etopen, the new Saimoe Prime Minister looked around, fanned herself to stay calm, but the tears of joy were coming down her eyes as she smiled, soaking it all in. She now felt like a head of state, like a really important person. And now, it was time for her to finally do her speech, which came from the heart.
"My partner for so long was unable to come up with a speech, so tonight, I am speaking for us.
For me, patience is something that cannot be forced or taught. Patience is one of those virtues that comes with winning. It comes from within. I came close so many times in my life, only to fall at the last hurdle or fall short of the edge of glory. This year has been different. Fueled by a drive to return to the policies set my my predecessor, Toki Onjouji, in 2012, the Saki Party has chosen me and my partner, Saki Miyanaga, in leading Japan into the year 2015.
My patience has been rewarded, my future has been secured, and with this, I am accepting your offer to become the 14th Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan with Saki.
The many years that I have been active in Saimoe have given me experience and a legacy that is unique in so many ways. People know my skills as a mahjong player and I have aspirations to play this game professionally. I have dreams of being a family person, a mother, and a good...wife. I promote lesbianism and the choice for anyone to choose who they want to love, regardless of sex, race, creed, color, orientation, or any other category that may restrict the empowering, emancipating power of choice.
We are here to not only promote the progressivism of our society, but also promote peace here in Japan, and around the world. Mahjong is our sport, and our country loves to play the game of mahjong. So as with the 2013 session, we plan to promote the game of riichi mahjong around the world and allow players to develop their own special abilities that will makes heads turn and convert skeptics into believers.
People will say that we have been too influential the past several years we have been competing in Saimoe. People will tell us, "Saimoe is dead," and bring other competitions to a more positive light. However, even after I am through with my term, I am confident that our competition to find the best young woman to lead Japan will continue with a new outlook and a toughness and resilience that you will not find in any other competition in the world. I believe the 2channel Anime Saimoe Tournament is the gold standard. And if they mock our process, that is a sign we are doing our job and we shall continue to promote the message of moe around the world.
I want to tell you a story. Last night, I was summoned by the outgoing Saimoe Prime Minister, Ms. Madoka Kaname, to take part in a mission that I will never forget. I was summoned to deliver Christmas presents to many people across the country, some in different dimensions, and some in different timelines. It was a journey of highs, it was a journey of lows. But through thick and thing, I learned a lot more about myself and how I could also help people who need happiness in their lives this holiday season.
I did this with my two deputy prime ministers: Saki, of course, and Shizuno Takakamo, both of whom I have known for many years, and whose lives I am indebted to, especially Saki's. We flew on a sleigh powered by men who never tired, who never quit, and who were dedicated to seeing us cross the finish line tonight.
And the people I met, and the lives I touched, were all amazing and unforgettable in their own right.
In a future timeline, I met the spirit of a young gamer who lost her life due to AIDS. With the blessings of her friend, I was able to initiate a foundation in her name dedicated to the research of a cure for AIDS, cancer and other terminal illnesses.
In a place about the skies called Synapse, I was able to bring close to an angeloid who lost her life out of love and devotion for the one person she always wanted. With her wedding dress and her ring worn, the cycle and exchange of vows was complete, the closure was made, and no matter what, they are forever together as one.
As the very first mission in this long journey I made, I went to a school in the heart of Akihabara to reward a rising idol group for reaching the pinnacle of success. Their tireless work and dedication to entertain audiences of all ages is commendable and must be respected by those who knew them, and those who have yet to know.
I even went to dimension in a game. There, the residents prefer card games or chess. I was able to introduce our party's sport of choice to the residents of Elchea City. It is my unshakable hope and belief that the Elchea Federation and all of Disboard will consider and use mahjong as a way to settle differences in the name of sport while at the same time experience fun and camaraderie among those special to them.
We even had two of our meals at places that were stomping grounds for some of the receipients of our gifts, A master of electricity, a teleportation aficionado, a computer genius and a daughter of a JSDF official were among some of the faces there. We passed by another school in which a lesbian couple were celebrating their new life together while reuniting with those that used to be their classmates. The power of the holidays allows old ties to be strengthened while creating new ones that will last a lifetime.
We gave gifts to important members of our party across the country, stretching from Hokkaido to Kyushu, our symbol of thanks for their support throughout this long drawn-out campaign. And before we arrived here, we gave gifts to everyone at a festival in both Mitakihara City and Kazamino City on behalf of both the Puella Magi Party and the Saki Party for their faith and support in the Saimoe movement this year.
Ecchi, yuri, comedy, drama, we do it all because we're all women and we love to be awesome. To the people in all those towns we visited, I collectively thank you for being on our side this year and supporting a winner.
This coming year, we plan to do more than just promote our party platform and work with the Imperial Household's Princess Aiko. We have a number of important events this year that we are planning to advocate. First, the FIFA 2015 Women's World Cup is coming. I call on the residents of Japan to support Nadeshiko Japan in the hopes that they will win their second FIFA Women's World Cup and further the perseverance from the disaster that took place in Tohoku in 2011.
A new threat to the world, the Islamic State, is rising in stregth and is unlike anything we have seen in our world. As your Saimoe Prime Minister, I will be an advocate in strengthening self-defense while advocating for humanitarian relief in those war-torn regions of the Middle East and North Africa that need our help.
The concept of East Asian Strength is important to us, and the Saimoe Diet will advocate for concessions to our partners in Korea and China while making changes to our study material in the name of historical accuracy. Cloud computing is another technology that we are hoping to advocate. Our goals is to ensure that everyone that is a part of the Saimoe movement utilizes the cloud to get things done.
Finally, we are hoping that Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, is able to outlive her great-great-grandmother Queen Victoria as the longest-reigning monarch. For this, three members of our Saimoe Diet, Aislinn Wishart, Karen Kujou and Alice Cartelet, will be assigned to be joint Saimoe ambassadors to the Commonwealth of Nations and Great Britain so that they may check on the progress of Her Majesty the Queen.
There are many other events, functions, and duties that I will need to do, but as I have an ambition to be a professional one day, I plan to use this as a way to better myself, to prepare for a life outside of school, and build the type of resolve that will make me a more complete individual. This is a calling that eluded me for many years. Now, I get my chance to show what I can do.
We are so confident about the future of Japan and what is next. New shows, new faces, new looks and feels, new everything. Saimoe will not end here. The movement will continue to go on because our supporters never waver and are dedicated to keeping the spirit alive and relevant in our society. So to the voters who participated during this campaign, I applaud you faith, I applaud your perseverance, and my election as your Saimoe Prime Minister is now your reward.
Japan is now ready to put its best foot forward and carry on the legacies of those that came before us into the future. We are ready. We are committed. We are excited and drive. The time is now. Rise. Stand up, Rejoice. Saimoe is now alive again, everywhere, always and forever. This is what makes Japan the greatest nation on Earth.
Thank you, have a wonderful evening, have a Merry Christmas, a Happy New Year and Season's Greetings. Take care of yourselves, be good to yourselves and be good to those you love. We love you all, we love you and we support you. May God bless you, and may God Bless Japan. Good night, everybody!"
-Nodoka Haramura
13th Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan (with Saki Miyanaga)
Nissan Stadium, Yokohama
December 25, 2014
After she concluded her speech, the three girls took a collective bow. As Shizuno applauded the crowd and fired them up one more time, pumping her fists in triumph, Saki and Nodoka looked at each other and after a smile shared a long, deep teary-eyed kiss that triggered the biggest cheers from the crowd. Saki embraced Nodoka through her half-lidded eyes of happiness, and they looked at their supporters, smiling as some of them even bowed down to worship them like the goddesses the were.
The sleigh then reappeared after another girl sandwich, triggering more hoots and holler, some boys' noses bleeding, and then they got on the sleigh. Full of confidence, and now with a sense of direction, Saki cracked the whip as the three of them waved goodbye and flew back to Saki house.
One hour later, they had returned. It was 1 a.m. "Oh man," Shizu said. "What an awesome trip. We're gonna lead the country again! Aren't you excited?"
"Tired," they said.
A jolt. Then a yawn. "Oh yeah, I'm also bushed. Excuse me while I pleasure Ako-chan." Nodoka and Saki watched as Shizu went up the stairs and then snuggled Ako, causing her to orgasm as they both fell asleep.
"Welcome back," said Kyoutarou, shaking their hands. "Congratulations, Nodoka. Congratulations to you too, Sakl."
"I can't believe you're now going to be a dad," Nodoka said. "Yuuki is going to be heartbroken now that you've...you know."
"I felt I needed to enter the next part of my life. Besides, I found out she's older than me and she can handle it by herself."
"You're not going to take responsibility?" Saki asked. "Kyoutarou..."
"No, no, I'll do that. It's just that Thouars is very independent and spontaneous can also manage."
"Don't let her do all the work, though," Nodoka said, the two of them heading to Saki's bedroom, which was designated empty. All the others were sleeping in another room, including Teru. "The child is also yours, too."
"I know, I know. I just want...experience."
"Good night," they said.
"Good night Saki, and Madame Prime Minister."
Nodoka smiled as the two of them went inside and they changed to their pajamas.
"I wonder how long we're going to sleep now," said Saki, as her eyes began to close.
"As long as we want, Saki," Nodoka said. "Good night. I love you."
"I love you too, Nodoka Haramura." The two of them, the new rulers of all things moe, were locked in a naked embrace as they began to sleep for what would be exactly 18.7 hours. Shizuno, on the other hand, wouldn't wake up for another 24. Thouars, Aika and Souji had already left, but they left a note, saying, "Merry Christmas, and thank you for your hard work. Let's do it again one day," to go with a large stipend to help fund all three mahjong clubs represented in the house.
OPERATION SAIMOE SANJO IKURI
THE END
