Sirius stepped through the front door without knocking. He waltzed into the kitchen hoping to find Lily there with something resembling food he wasn't picky at this point.

The kitchen was in ruins. Cupboards open, dishes broken on the floor, the water in the sink still magically running. Sirius felt all the blood in his body turn to ice. He slipped his wand into his hand from his back pocket, and slowly threaded his way through the wreckage of the kitchen. He searched all of the rooms in the house surveying the haphazard damage. Who ever had come, didn't seem to be looking for anything in particular, and if Lily had been home it didn't look as though there had been a fight. No scorch marks on the walls, no blood anywhere. Sirius mounted the stairs.

He found Lily in the bedroom, her arms wrapped around her knees, she had been crying, her eyes red from it, but her cheeks were dry now. She didn't look up as he came through the door, she didn't move when he crouched in front of her, and didn't acknowledge that she heard him call her name.

Sirius sat in front of her and eyed her carefully. "Lily?"

Nothing.

"Lily you left the water running downstairs…"

Not a flicker.

"Lils…?"

"Leave me alone, Black."

"Did you and James have a row?"

Lily narrowed her eyes.

"Did you and James have a big nasty row?"

Lily cracked the muscles in her neck, "Its not any of your business."

"Well as James's best man, I do take a personal interest in his happiness and by extension your own. If you're not happy, James is not happy, and if James is not happy he's a bit of an ass comes over to my place to mope and make a nuisance of himself." Sirius scratched his ear. "Unless you didn't have a row, and you tore up your own house for fun…"

"It wasn't for fun."

"Well…?"

"Well what?"

Sirius sighed. "You know, Lils, I'm not an idiot. It looks like a Death Eater went to town in your kitchen and you've been crying."

Lily looked at Sirius for a long time, her green eyes roving over his unshaven face. "You wouldn't care."

"I doubt that very much."

Lily ran a hand through her hair. "I received a letter today…"

"And?"

"It was from Severus—"

"Snivellus? How in the holy hells did he find you?"

"I don't know," she said looking at the floor, "But if he could find us…it's not that I think he'd come to hurt me or James but, since he's working for you-know-who I have to wonder who else knows where we are and—"

Sirius was on his feet in an instant. "Not hurt you? For Merlin's sake Lily, wake up! The man's a bleeding death eater! Did you hear what he did to Gideon Prewitt? I was there Lily, I had to carry Gideon to Mungo's; he'd lost so much blood they didn't think he'd last the night."

"Is he…?"

"For now. But if that rat knows you're here we've got tell the Order, get you moved as soon as we can. It's clearly not safe here anymore."

"It's not safe anywhere!" Lily wailed. "It doesn't matter where we go, because someone will find us there, and then one of us won't come home, and…" Lily covered her face with her hands and cried. Really cried. Deep wracking sobs that shook her from shoulder to toe. Sirius had never witnessed such a display of raw emotion, the light fixtures were blinking, and Sirius watched in mild horror as the paint on the walls began to melt. Lily was a powerful witch if she could do this without even knowing, no wonder the kitchen looked like a war zone. He coughed awkwardly trying to think of a way to distract Lily before she tore her own house apart.

"Lils, come on now, we'll get through, I'm mean, we've got Dumbledore for Merlin's sake, and well it's not all bad is it?"

"I'm pregnant!" She cried.

The dresser began to shake. Sirius grabbed Lily by the arms and hauled her up. "Lily!"

She was shaking in his grasp, her eyes strangely unfocused. Sirius pulled her into a tight embrace, rubbing her back in slow smooth strokes. "Lily, it's going to be alright, everything is going to be alright. Really Lily,"

"What am I going to do Sirius? I can't possibly keep it, how can we raise a kid in this?"

"I don't know, but Molly Weasley is still going strong."

Lily shuddered.

"She's due again soon…"

Lily pulled away from Sirius. She folded her arms across her chest, "Would you keep it, if you were me?"

Sirius scratched his head and shifted his weight, unwilling to meet her eyes.

"You wouldn't." she said.

"I can't say for sure Lily, but we both know that James will be thrilled over the whole thing…" Sirius watched Lily blush. "You weren't even going to tell him. You have to tell him, Lils, I mean come on the man is your husband."

"You think I don't know that? You don't think I'm drowning under the thought of it. I know he wants kids, but we agreed not now, and this wasn't supposed to happen. We're so young, and with things the way they are, how could we bring a kid into this?"

"Life doesn't stop for wars, Lily."

"And wars don't stop for babies."

Sirius nodded, and then shrugged. "I'll go put the kitchen back together, and I'll write Remus and Moody to assemble the Order, but you have to tell James. I don't think you could hold a secret like that forever, and really Lils, I don't think you'd want to."

"I'd be protecting him."

"You'd be protecting you." Sirius walked out the door towards the question. "Either way Lily, he loves you. We all do. And you're a smart witch, just tell him…"

"Or you will?"

Sirius shook his head, "Not my secret." He smiled at her and walked out into the kitchen.