Author's Note: This didn't turn out quite how I wanted it to. It's not very good. But I figured that it's been so long since I've posted anything that I might as well go ahead.
She supposes that it might be better to just leave. To pack a bag, sell her apartment, and move far away. Away from him. Away from her.
Away from them.
But she doesn't.
She supposes that if she were to leave she could be melodramatic about it. Don't tell him and let him discover that she's gone all on his own. Or leave a letter telling him that she'd fallen in love with him and that she couldn't see him running around with her. She could be melodramatic about it.
But she isn't.
Instead, she stays. She watches him use her smile on his reporter girlfriend. Watches him put his hand on her back. Watches as slowly everything that was theirs-Booth and Bones'-becomes Booth and Hannah's.
She watches as he moves on.
She'd always said that emotions were ephemeral. Chemical reactions in the brain that simply didn't last. He'd almost had her believing otherwise with his 'someday' and 'everything-happens-eventually' and his 'miracles'. Until the day when he told her that he was taking a gamble… a gamble on her.
A gamble on them.
He told her that he'd known. She was 'the one'. He wanted to spend the next 30, 40, or 50 years with her. And she'd gotten scared. She'd pulled back. And he-without a fight, without trying to convince her otherwise-let her.
She finds it funny that she'd felt such an urge to run then. Even when she knew it was best to stay, and now when it would probably be best to go she can't do it. Can't let go of his 'someday' and 'everything-happens-eventually' and his 'miracles'.
But mostly she just can't let go of him. She'd once told Hannah that when Booth loves you, he gives you everything. She's starting to think that maybe she loves the same way.
So she stays. She doesn't quit her job or sell her apartment. She doesn't pack a bag and move far away. Instead she watches.
She watches as he proposes, and Hannah says 'yes'. She's there when they get married-sitting in the back grasping Angela's hand so tightly that afterward she notices some slight bruising. She's there on Hannah's 'just-us-girls' nights. She's even there when Hannah goes into labor and the Burley-Booth's welcome their first child into the world. She's there to play Auntie Tempe,(even as a small part of her whispers that she should be the one the child calls 'mommy') to his first child and then ones following.
She's there for the important public milestones. Even when Booth stops talking to her. Even when Hannah uses every opportunity to match make.
She's there when Booth retires, and although he doesn't acknowledge her at the party she leaves him a present anyway. She's there as Booth and Hannah grow old, as their children grow up and get married and have children of their own.
She's there even when her heart is breaking (because there is only so much crushing an organ can endure before it starts tearing).
Sometimes she rues the day that she ever met Seeley Booth. Sometimes she hates him for making her care…for making her love… for turning her world upside down.
She'd like to say that 'sometimes' turned into 'all the time', but she can't. She can't because no matter how hard it is to see him with someone else she could never hate him. Not really.
She'd like to hate Hannah… but how can she when all the reporter is guilty of is loving the love of Brennan's life? How can she hate Hannah when Booth is so happy with her? When Hannah give him everything that Brennan couldn't?
She watches as his life goes on, as he gets everything that he ever wanted, and she is left behind. No longer needed. No longer important. Like a doll put up on a shelf to gather dust and wither away.
And wither she does. She grows old, near him, but not with him. She spends the next 30, 40, or 50 years watching and loving and staying. Spends them playing the good 'best friend' until Hannah yet again takes her place. Until the center no longer holds but instead becomes nonexistent.
Until there is nothing left of Booth's 'Bones' except two figurines that she keeps on her bookshelf.
She could have saved herself the pain. She could have left.
Could have been melodramatic about it (maybe if she had Booth would have realized what he was losing).
But she doesn't.
She isn't.
She stays.
