It's FINALLY the End for Penelope Pittstop!

By Sharan McQuack, Launchpad's wife.

Dating myself, aren't I? By admitting I remember this stupid show. I have no doubt this is EXACTLY what the little dingbat would do, either. I can't think of a worse punishment for her Guardian, neither. I THOUGHT I remembered he was her Uncle, but it was 40 years ago!


Penelope's Guardian, Sylvester Sneaky sighed. It was over. It was Penelope's 21st birthday and here they were at the lawyers.

Penelope was about to inherit the money her parents had left her. All these years, he had control over all that lovely money and she lived on a trust fund he administered. And she lived very high on the hog, too. She could well afford to- it was so much money, even just the trust fund was more money than most people will see in their lifetimes.

And he had found ways to multiple that money many, many times. While charging a fee for his services. And while embezzling the money under her pretty little nose. And trying his best to kill her, in his guise of the Hooded Claw.

Nobody could say he didn't try. He so loved all that money, he could not bear the thought of giving it up. But he knew he, her legal Guardian, would be the most oblivious suspect if she died. After all, if Penelope died before her 21st birthday, he would inherit all that money.

So he created the false identity of the Hooded Claw. A dangerous maniac who hated Penelope and wanted to kill her because he was nuts. If the Hooded Claw succeeded, it would have nothing to do with him, Penelope's Guardian. A tragedy such a young and lovely girl had to die, of course. But that such a young and lovely and rich girl might make somebody so jealous they'd decide to kill her out of spite- well, we all know there are crazy people in the world.

But now it was over. All those times he had tried to kill her. And failed, time after time. In a few minutes, the money would be hers forever and he would be out in the cold. He had no doubt she would reward the Anthill Mob richly for rescuing her many, many times. She might even marry one of them.

"Well, Penelope, you waited many years for this. You are now 21 years old. You merely have to sign this consent form, and you will gain control of your parents' fortune." Penelope's lawyer said.

"But I don't want it. I want you to draw up a different form. I've given this a lot of thought, and I've decided to allow my Guardian to go right on controlling my money and living on the trust fund, same as always." Penelope said, much to everyone's shock and surprise.

"Excuse me?" the lawyer asked.

"My Guardian, Mr. Sneaky has done an excellent job of administrating my money, hasn't he? It's actually grown a great deal, despite all the money I've spent, hasn't it?" Penelope asked.

"True. Very True. Many times over." her lawyer admitted. He frankly believed her Guardian was embezzling money left and right, but Mr. Sneaky so sneaky about it, there was no way of proving it.

Beside, Penelope was right. Her Guardian was so good at playing the stock market, that even if he did embezzle money, he STILL increased her fortune better than anybody else could of.

"Then why should I change things? I don't know the first thing about handling money or the stock market. My Guardian does. And I trust him. Draw up some legal paper that lets him go right on controlling my money until he dies and I'll sign THAT. That way I don't have to worry about my spending the money foolishly or fortune hunters trying to marry me for my money or anything of the sort. I can just go on, living the way I've always lived. And who knows? Maybe if I give up all that money that horrible Hooded Claw will finally LEAVE ME ALONE AND LET ME LIVE IN PEACE!" Penelope said.

So Penelope's lawyer drew up the form. And Penelope signed it.
"There! And I hope you outlive me, Guardian, so I never have to worry about trying to control all that money!" Penelope said, and SHE MEANTH IT.

A few minutes later, the shock of this had worn off. And once he was all alone, Penelope's Guardian found himself a nice hard tree to knock his head against.

"It was for NOTHING! NOTHING! All that work! All that trouble! All that planning! And she just hands me the money! I didn't have to BOTHER!" Penelope's' Guardian said.

The End.