Episode: "Niagara Brawls"
Song Dancing Through My Ears: Timmy, Meg & Dia — ❀.
Duncan watched the couples ahead bicker and ultimately fail, indifferent. He rolled his eyes and faced his "wife," reluctance tied around his actions. He stuffed his hands in his pockets.
Courtney was glaring at him, arms crossed over her chest. Surprise, surprise.
"Ya ready?" he questioned; his tone was bored and slightly irritable. He just wanted to get this challenge done and over with and win it. It was bad enough he had to do it with her.
"You are fortunate enough to know that the others are failing — for you!" she snapped, glaring toughening. "But if they didn't fail, we would've lost this silly challenge because of your damn slothfulness! Why'd you make them go first, anyway? Winners deserve to go first; I'm a winner. You're not a winner, but since you're my … husband — " cue disgusted tone " — we have to win together. Second place is not an — "
Jeez, how could he have endured all this babbling during the times they were dating? How could anyone?
He took a quick glance to his fellow competitors and saw that they were still bickering. He turned back to his "wife" and narrowed his teal eyes at her. She was still talking her ass off.
" … need a strategic plan for this particular challenge, because it's fairly effortless. Since you're my partner, however, you might create some setbacks for me. Basically, we have to see if they will still be — "
"God, will you ever shut the crap up?" Duncan yelled, reaching his breaking point. He scowled. His fists were clenched by his sides, trembling.
She was unfazed. "I can't 'shut the crap up,' because we need to formulate a plan — "
He groaned aloud. He dove down and grabbed her around the waist, hoisting her over his right shoulder. He ignored the loud shriek from his ex and made sure his arm was wrapped firmly and tightly around her torso. His hand was on top of her back.
Grunts came out of his system when she started pounding on his back. Why the hell did his partner have to be damn volatile?
"I demand to be placed down, you idiot! You two-timing jerk! You do not deserve to manhandle me like that! I am not a sack of potatoes! I am not! Put me down, put me down!" She continued to pound his back, flailing around.
He gritted his teeth from the pain and from this girl who lived to make his life hell. He remembered that she wore heels, and she was moving her legs to and fro.
He almost paled. Not wanting to risk his precious place and wanting to shut her up, he frantically tried to think of a solution.
The smirk appeared.
He loosened his hold on the screaming girl, making sure she slid down from his shoulder to a certain point. He almost winced when she screamed more and more, tone escalating — "What the heck are you doing? Are you going to drop me? You good-for-nothing piece of idiocy!" — but he held on strong. He stopped her from falling when he made sure she was … comfortable.
Right on the dot, she quieted. Oh, the silence was soothing to his ears.
"What … what — why's — what're you — ?" she spluttered, voice shaking. He could feel the warmness emitting from her body even though she was wearing a dress.
The smirk was permanent on his face. "Shh, shh. Let's just do the challenge, 'kay … sweetheart?"
He heard her grumble to herself, but she finally kept silent.
Smugness covered his face. Even though they weren't together anymore, there were good advantages about exes you have been with for a long time — like you knew a lot about them.
Like you knew how to shut them up.
His rebellious hand stayed planted on her rear end.
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Expect a lifetime supply of coconut cream pies, readers.
Oh, and imagine Duncan's hand thinking, "Score!"
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