DISCLAIMER: I don't own PJO. The troll known as Rick Riordan does. *huff*
CALYPSO'S POV
Listen up geniuses. For the fucking last time, I don't like Leo Valdez. He's an annoying, self-conceited brat who can't sit still for five damn seconds. Guess who completely trashed my peaceful island? Leo Valdez. Guess who trampled my precious plants? Leo fucking Valdez. Guess who disturbed my sleep? You guessed it, Leo Valdez.
My first few days with him were torture. In a short period of time, he had broken half my plates, injured a few of my fellow servants (don't ask me how. I simply do not understand. My head was filled with whiny voices for days!), and worst of all, he fucking burned ALL my clothes except for the red dress I hate! How DARE he come onto MY island and act like he owns the place? Hey, I'd rather have my heart broken all over again a thousand times than spend another second in his presence. Just kill me now. Oh wait, I can't die because I'm FUCKING IMMORTAL IN THE PERIOD I'M STUCK ON THIS ISLAND. And before someone mentions, I'm allowed to swear when I'm extremely pissed. And a pirate once came by so I'm not an innocent Titan.
Listen to me when I say that I only gave Leo clothes and food out of the kindness of my heart. I'm a very kind-hearted soul, you know. Ha, no, I'm just nicer than other deities. My sisters anyways. Man, they could rattle on about the 'flaws' of their suitors. Stupid shit like,
"His nose was too big!"
"I know, right? My one gave me a small teddy bear! Like, how dare he?"
"Pfft, try a small dick! It would never fill me up!" (That one is so gross)
Zoe was my favorite sister. She had the right idea about boys. No boys. Join Artemis. Blah blah blah. I wish I listened to her. Shame she died though. Ha, I love faking sadness. Those strong, muscular men holding me in their arms. Ahh, Percy. If only Annabeth was out of the picture…
Phew, it's been a long time since I've been able to sleep peacefully. I should probably check on Leo in the morning. To see if he's okay. Yes, that's a great reason to see those warm brown eyes. Wait, Calypso, snap out of it! You can't fall for Leo fucking Valdez, right?
