The Ewok Who Died for Our Sins, by Dickfart
rey went on a fuckboy message board one day and said "i'm a girl jedi and i'm in stair fax now suck my labia tit" and all the fat blubber ironic nazi trump supporter asshole fuckers that jerked off into their fedoras and pony fleshlights said "boo" and "i fapped to laci green buhfore she was red pill" and "get back in the kitchen and make muh err sandwich i'm too fat to get up" so she got mad and flipped a table with her MIND then went over to kylo ren's house while he was listening korn and fondling his balls and she said "you know what I hate fuckboys and disney and the illuminati let's team up and kill them all" to which kyol ren sed "k but first take a moment to appreciate my rippling abs and thighs" after gazing at his pale chicken skin drooping pathetically off branchy bones they sacrificed a pokeman called EWOK to the gods of starr worrs and summoned the spirit of lord vader who then became a virus on ever fuckboy's computer and what he said to them all was "i have altered your porn pray i don't alter it any further" and then he choked them all until they died and everyone livd happile every after except carrie fisher (rip carrie you were awesome) also vader said "luke i am your father" the mandela effect is real and chemtrails are real it's just like naruto said BELIEVE IT also taylor swift sucks and white chocolate reeses taste like god damn ass also the death star blew up earth and all humans are now dead except for fry, all according to bender's plan
this would go on but i really have to pee so bye
