Bleach is (c) Kubo Tite. Views expressed in this work are neither those of Tite or Shonen Jump and solely of the author. This is a fanwork that the author makes no profit from
So Perfect
It hit him suddenly. He was standing next to the man he'd had a crush on for the better part of his secondary school life. Beers sat on the balcony railing between them as they watched the lunar eclipse. That's when Ichigo realized that Grimmjow was his soulmate. There had always been an inexplicable draw between them. They fought when they were children constantly. But after Ichigo's mother passed away, an experience with a group of bullies had Grimmjow deciding that nobody was allowed to punch Ichigo other than himself. It had grown into a fiercely close friendship. It was an odd one. One that had more than a few all out knock down fights, but they understood each other better than anyone.
The problem with Ichigo realizing that his best friend was his soulmate was in Grimmjow's sexuality. The man was a very rigorous lover from what Ichigo understood. And while he experienced a deep love for his friend, he often found himself uninterested in anything sexual. He'd thought there was something wrong with him at first. How could anyone not want to be with someone that looked the way Grimmjow did? His freshmen year of college he dated a pretty goth boy. One with inky hair and wide, sad eyes. That relationship had told him everything he needed to know. Ulquiorra was a strange character, quiet and pensive. Ichigo had enjoyed his time with him, but rarely did anything go beyond platonic touches. They'd had a conversation one night while he helped the other man clip Murcielago's nails. Between the unhappy hisses of the cat, Ulquiorra had calmly asked if Ichigo was finding sexual release elsewhere or just afraid to perform. He would have been affronted if it had been anyone else, but Ulquiorra was the least accusatory person he knew. He explained with an embarrassed flush that something was wrong with him. He explained how he thought Ulquiorra was beautiful and he enjoyed kissing him and even laying next to him, but otherwise his body just didn't react. He just never thought about sex. The tiny smile he received to his answer made him feel like everything was alright. They'd broken up afterwards amicably. Their friendship had grown though.
Ichigo knew that should he ever enter into a relationship with Grimmjow, that he would not be able to satiate the other's sexual appetite. It had been disheartening and he never wanted to go dos the path of ruining their friendship. Grimmjow also was full of movement. He never stayed in one place too long. Ichigo knew that the commitment required to be in a sexless relationship would probably overtax them. So he was happy to stay by his friend's side, meeting up for drinks every few weeks.
On one particular night the dynamic changed. Their old group had gotten together to celebrate Tatsuki's birthday. Grimmjow had gotten utterly sloshed trying to out drink Matsumoto. Ichigo had then volunteered to take him home with an apology to everyone. As they had fumbled up the stairs together Grimmjow pinned him to the wall. He was surprised at the drunken kiss but gently pulled back.
"Hey don't. You're so trashed right now." He murmured.
"I know. Dun care..." He slurred. "Wanna kiss again. "
"Grimm, please don't. " Ichigo pushed harder and started them back up the stairs. "You'll regret it. "
"Bitch. " Grimmjow barked with a little laugh. "I want 'a kiss ya for a long time. "
Ichigo sighed as he unlocked the door and half dragged his friend inside. "This is not one of your drunk sexcapades Grimm. It's me, Ichigo. "
"Yea." He drawled. "Ichigo my hot as fuck best friend. Ichigo who I've liked since 7th fucking grade. " he grinned widely. "I know who I wanna kiss. "
"Grimm I'm not going to put out for you. Rather, I can't. " Ichigo admitted quietly while dumping his larger body on the guest bed. "I'm not attracted to you like that. "
"Bullshit. " Grimmjow snickered again. "Who said hell about putting out. I just wanna kiss you. "
Ichigo shook his head fondly. "Sleep it off. If you're still feeling that brave in the morning you can try again."
"Promise..?" Asked around a yawn.
"Sure. "
Ichigo didn't want to read into it. He didn't want to mistake Grimmjow's drunken actions for anything deeper, but his heart was ridiculously hopeful. Instead of sleep he messaged Ulquiorra to ask his opinion. He'd agreed that waiting until Grimmjow was sober was wise. Although, he told Ichigo that perhaps Grimmjow was more perceptive than he'd given credit for. Either way, he thought that if anything was to come of the strange turn of events, he would have to be upfront with the other man. Of course since Grimmjow was his closest and dearest friend, it made sense to tell him about it first to make an attempt at avoiding a difficult situation later. He pondered on what the other would think, but finally left it alone in favor of sleep.
The following morning started with the sounds of Grimmjow falling out of bed followed by loud cursing. Ichigo sighed as he got up to check on his friend. The comical scene of the taller man tangled in the comforter half-way off the bed was worth the rude awakening. He sighed as he shook his head and went to Grimmjow's aide wondering just how he'd ended up so twisted in the blanket.
"You drank a lot. I hope you didn't puke in my bed. " he commented with a snort.
"Yeah yeah. That was only once in highschool. " Grimmjow grunted out. "Thanks. " he muttered.
"Get up and take a shower. You stink. I still have a change of your clothes in the closet there. " Ichigo stood and started towards the door. "I'll make us some breakfast. "
Grimmjow flipped him off playfully and began stripping before he even left the room. Even though the other did not seem hungover, he still decided on a lighter breakfast. All he wanted was a cup of coffee, but he instead worked on making a somewhat traditional breakfast. He had enough rice in the cooker from the previous day to make a porridge. As for the rest. He fried an egg for himself and one for Grimmjow and put it on toast with lettuce. After a moment's thought, he put the jar of bulldog sauce on the table catering to the other man's strange tastes.
"I smell coffee. I smell eggs. But where's my meat?" Grimmjow hummed while coming into the kitchen.
"This is not your mom's house. Put a damn shirt on." Ichigo snipped while throwing a potholder at the other.
"And deny you the pleasure of seeing this body? No way. " he grinned and sat at the table.
Ichigo chuckled at his friend a small blush coming to his cheeks. "Shut it you egoist. " he set a plate and a mug in front of Grimmjow. "You're lucky I'm nice enough to make you breakfast after last night. "
Grimmjow's expression softened a bit. "I still want to kiss you. I meant what I said last night. "
Ichigo swallowed nervously as he sat down. "Why? You won't get any satisfaction from it. " he mumbled.
"Because you're the one I've been wanting to kiss since middle school. " Grimmjow admitted with a shrug.
Ichigo sighed and nibbled on his serving thoughtfully. "I like you a lot. But I won't be able to satisfy you. "
"What are you talking about?" He snorted. "You more than satisfy me."
"I mean sexually..." His eyes cast downwards. "I can't. I just don't function that way. "
"Give me some credit here. " Grimmjow laughed. "I know you don't like that stuff. But I know I can still kiss you. " he smirked.
"And how do you know that?"
"You were never affectionate with anyone. Even when you were dating that goth guy. Which by the way, he's dating your old lit professor. "
"That somehow doesn't surprise me. Wonder why he didn't tell me. "
"Look Ichi, yea sex with you would be awesome, but I don't care if you never want it. I just like being with you. I can't imagine you not being there. "
"It's more difficult than that though. " he protested. "You're a very physical person. I don't want to do anything past kissing or snuggling. I know that sounds lame. "
"Hey, I can get my physical rise out of sparring with you. That's actually when I feel the closest to you. " he shrugged.
"You say that. But would you really be okay with me never wanting sex?"
"If it means I get to have you then it's totally worth it. " he grinned around the mug.
"Okay. We can try, but Grimm if you change your mind..."
"I won't. "
He said it with a decisive nod. It somehow made Ichigo feel sure. After all, Grimmjow was a stubborn man. They finished breakfast in an easy quiet. It was strange for Ichigo knowing that just a few months ago he'd resigned himself to always being the best friend but never more. He smiled as he looked across the table. He hoped it would work out. Grimmjow smirked as he caught the smile and gave out a little snort of a laugh.
"Ichi, I'm going to kiss you when I leave. That makes it official. You're my boyfriend. "
The first few months dating had not been too difficult. They made extra time when they could between jobs to see each other. Ichigo worked odd hours as a massage therapist often seeing clients outside of office hours, where Grimmjow drifted in and out doing stunt choreography and motion capture. Most of their meetings were easy dates; jogging together, eating out, or even just driving down to the shore. There was no pull toward anything physical other than a few kisses and the occasional hand holding. It was nice.
Things got a little tougher as they were able to spend more time together. Sometimes movies would turn into kissing and a little bit of petting. Grimmjow tried his best to respect Ichigo's lack of sexual interest. When it got a bit too much he would attempt to extricate himself from the situation to cool down. Many times he found himself jerking off in the bathroom after heavy kissing with Ichigo. It was difficult because despite the lack of desire, Ichigo still enjoyed the tangible bits of their relationship. He loved hugs and touching. His hands liked to explore and trace patterns on bare flesh. It could get maddening for Grimmjow sometimes.
"Hey." He started while they were snuggled together on his couch one night. "You know I'm trying to be respectful of your boundaries right?"
"Yeah. " Ichigo murmured suddenly worried.
"Problem is, I'm not sure what your boundaries are. " he scratched his cheek idly. "Like is it just sex, or do you not like nudity or..?"
Ichigo smiled in some relief. "How about this, I'll kiss you. You react like you normally would, if I get uncomfortable I'll tap two times. "
"Yeah. Okay. " Grimmjow grinned and pulled Ichigo closer.
They sat through about half the movie when Ichigo decided he wanted a kiss. He nudged Grimmjow with his nose drawing his attention and then stretched up to initiate. It was slow at first. Short kisses turned into more languid ones and lips parted for deeper ones. These kinds of kisses made Ichigo feel warm, but not lust. The feeling was more of connection and completeness. Grimmjow liked to touch as he kissed and his hands went from the back of his boyfriend's head to his back and eventually to rest on his hips. Ichigo sighed softly but didn't pull away.
"Is it okay?" He murmured against Ichigo's lips.
"Yea. I like your touch. " he nuzzled into his neck.
"Fuck Ichi. " Grimmjow rumbled. "That really turned me on. " he inhaled deeply then slowly let it out.
"Sorry Grimm. " he leaned back and smiled a bit. "Do you want me to stop?"
"No, but if we keep this up I'm gonna have to take a cold shower. " he smirked. "Kissing you is worth it though. "
"I'll try not to tease. " Ichigo leaned forward again to kiss him. "Even if it doesn't turn me on I really do like kissing and touching you. "
Grimmjow grinned as he pulled Ichigo down. Their kisses were messy and fierce, just like their sparring sessions. And even though it was taking every ounce of restraint in him to hold back, he really did enjoy it. Ichigo seemed okay with skin to skin contact and had discarded his shirt. It was something that drove Grimmjow wild with desire, but he reigned it in and let the other pull his off as well. For a moment Ichigo paused and leaned his forehead against the larger man's chest. He took several deep breaths and then cleared his throat.
"Grimm, I know I won't participate, but would it make it better if I watched?" He asked quietly.
"What? What're you talking about?"
"Would you like it if I watched you jerk off? Would it make you feel like I was included in your pleasure?"
Grimmjow was silent for a moment thinking it over. Yes he knew he'd like that. "I mean, yeah, that's totally hot, but are you okay with that?"
"Grimm, just because I'm not sexually interested doesn't mean I don't love seeing your body. You are beautiful. " he pulled back and cupped the strong jaw. "I will enjoy watching you because it will make you happy. "
No words were needed. He moved to the floor as Grimmjow nodded. Ichigo was completely comfortable with nudity seeing as his job dealt with it, but he genuinely loved tracing over the dips and planes of his boyfriend's body with his gaze. Grimmjow was perfection. He knew how strong he was; each story to every scar; the whitened roughness of calluses from hours of kendo practice; how much time each tattoo had taken. He had so many memories tied into this person he loved. His eyes were attuned to every movement Grimmjow made. Rapt fascination with fingers dancing below the belt and eventually exposing his impressive sex. Ichigo felt a bit amazed that he had caused such a reaction for his boyfriend. He smirked at the memory of the twin dydoe piercings adorning the head of Grimmjow's penis. Surprisingly enough though, he thought they fit the other.
"How do I look?" Grimmjow asked with a wink.
"Like an Eidolon" Ichigo commented with a smile. "Strong and unearthly. "
Grimmjow cupped himself and began to stroke slowly eyes focused on Ichigo lounging next to the couch. It felt voyeuristic and naughty despite his full consent and it made him more aroused. Ichigo seemed to be interested though his gaze locked on to the movement of his hand and if studying. It might have been somewhat clinical, but it made all the difference that it was Ichigo. Grimmjow moaned and sped his hand up throwing his head back in pleasure. He could feel the intense stare and imagined Ichigo's liquid Amber eyes. His hand rubbed against the ridge of his piercings causing a small sting that he loved. He hissed at the feel.
He started when he felt Ichigo's cheek against his shoulder and a thumb running over his hipbone. Ichigo smiled at him when his eyes popped open. The touch was soft and innocent, but he understood that his boyfriend was trying to contribute within his own comfort zone. It caused more heat and he stroked faster. Soft kisses peppered along his jaw and suddenly he found himself climaxing with a low moan. He sighed contentedly and slumped back against the armrest of the couch. Ichigo's hand carded through his hair gently urging him to relax in his post orgasm haze.
"Was that okay?" He mumbled after he caught his breath. "Because I wouldn't mind having you watch again sometime. "
"Yea. " Ichigo whispered and rested his chin on the seat cushion. "You're beautiful Grimm. I want to draw you next time. "
"Fuck Ichi. You're so perfect. I wouldn't have you any other way. " he murmured while turning to face the other.
"Yea Grimm. Same here. "
Notes: I wanted to attempt a story with asexual Ichigo. I'd always thought him to be more Demi than anything else, so in this instance he's Demi-romantic ace. I liked the idea of him loving Grimmjow's body just because he thinks he's beautiful and not because he feels sexual attraction to it. I wanted to show that there are ace people who have a good relationship and don't have an aversion to sex or the related activities. I felt like I had a good dynamic between them. I seriously hope that I didn't make anyone too uncomfortable or misrepresent this part of the spectrum. I really enjoyed writing this.
