Hey guys, so this is just the first part of a two chapter story I'm doing about a different take on the shooting. Now please just read till the end of the chapter to see what happens. Thanks

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She stood in front of the large mirror in the closet of her bedroom. She could never get over this closet and how huge it was. It was a massive room bigger than their whole first apartment on Morgan Street. She ran her hand over the deep blue silk dress taking in every detail of it. It was a beautiful dress, probably one of the most beautiful she had ever worn. Her stylist had truly outdone herself. It was a special dress for a special occasion, her husband's 50th birthday Gala. He hadn't wanted a big party, but she had insisted, she needed this party, it was her chance. She turned her attention back to the dress as she traced the beading around the hem, it was such a shame such a beautiful dress would be ruined. They would cut it open when they were doing the C- section to save the baby. Ah the baby, the little boy kicking away inside of her. She smiled when she thought of him, she loved how innocent babies were, how they hadn't been exposed to the real world yet, how they hadn't realized that the silver lining can't distract from the darkness of the clouds. She had used to be like that, hopeful with big dreams for the future, until that night where everything changed. That part of her life, the joy the happiness, the optimism was gone, crushed by Big Jerry deciding that his 3 minutes of pleasure was worth her lifetime of pain. She didn't want to think about it, she never thought about it, that part of her life didn't exist, that chapter was closed never to be reopened. That had never happened to her , it would be very hard to forget something like that , you would have to go to deep dark places to forget that. She quickly pushed the thoughts out of her head as she turned her attention back to the mirror. She reached out and rested her hand on the glass staring at her reflection in the mirror. Her mind wandered back to that day in 1993 to the girl in her hotel room twirling in front of a mirror in her wedding dress. The naïve little girl so young and innocent , so determined to not have a marriage like her parents but instead to have a happy loving relationship with the man of her dreams. Oh how that girl had disappeared, vanished under the layers of pain, gone replaced by a ghost made up of broken dreams and failed promises. That little girl so excited about her future, so excited about her future happiness was gone ….. she had gotten to the Whitehouse , she walked the corridors of power but it didn't matter , nothing mattered anymore.

She glanced over at his side of the closet, it was empty. She wanted to believe that he was off somewhere doing something presidential but in all honesty he was probably off screwing Olivia Pope. Every time she thought of them she felt a tiny piece of her die. She had known for a year, when she first found out her heart had shattered in a million pieces. She had wanted to break down right there on the floor of the oval, but she couldn't. She was first lady and she and a reputation to uphold. Instead she had headed to the bathroom, turned the shower on to the hottest setting and stood under it for hours. She had felt so broken and numb she hadn't even noticed the scalding hot water burning her skin. She just fell to the floor of the shower and sobbed. She curled up in a ball and sobbed for hours. At one point she had grabbed her razor and considered it .It would be so easy, one swoop and it would all be over. She couldn't do it through….. It was too messy, to many questions it would ruin Fitz's career, and she had given away to many pieces of herself for his career to end because of her selfishness. Instead she had pulled herself up of the floor put on a cocktail dress and headed off to play the whole good wife routine. Although she had left the razor behind, she never forgot that moment in the shower all these years later.

She glanced down at her watch seeing that it was time to go. She slowly slipped on her heels and walked out of the closet turning the lights off for the last time. She walked down the halls she had only dreamed of as a child. Staffers smiled and shot looks of pity , they all knew , everybody knew. She felt her heels click as they hit the marble floors. She had always dreamed about the Whitehouse as her fairytale castle not realizing it was just the crown jewel of the American prison system. She walked to the door of the Whitehouse where the secret service opened it for her leading her to the car where Fitz was waiting. As they drove away she glanced back at the Whitehouse as it disappeared into the distance. As soon as they were closer to the party she decided to finally speak to him without looking at him though.

"Remember that time we went skinny dipping in my pool and then the gardeners came and we had to hide in the guest house for hours because we didn't have clothing" she reminisced

"What about it?" he asked coldly

"Just remember those moments once this is all over"

"What's all over?" he asked

"All this …. Just when it's over please remember that I love … loved you" she said as they pulled into the circle.

"Mellie what are you talking about … what's going on?"Fitz asked as he grabbed her hand

"Explaining's to complicated, there's a letter on your desk in the oval that will do that, just please remember the girl who you married, try to remember her no me please don't remember me." she said as she pulled her land away exiting the limo. Fitz exited as well scanning the cheering crowd trying to figure out what was making Mellie act so strange. He grabbed her hand as they smiled to the crowd. Suddenly he felt her squeeze his hand as a gunshot rang out covering him in blood.