Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Jeff and Annie were currently making out in Jeff's car parked in front of Annie's apartment. Technically, they were doing more than making out, but calling it 'heavy petting' made him feel like a teenager sitting in Sex Ed class. He had moved the seat farther back than it already was for someone as tall as him so Annie could be relatively comfortable as she straddled him in the front seat. She was nervous about hitting the steering wheel and setting off the horn which had already happened…twice.

One of Jeff's hands was snaking through Annie's hair as he kissed and nuzzled her neck while his other hand was creeping up her thigh and passed her raised dress. If it was the action of his lips or his hands that were the cause of Annie's heavy breathing and the keening noises she was making, he didn't know. And to be honest, he didn't care. As long she kept her hand where it currently was.

After a particularly long kiss, followed by some shared heavy breathing, Annie pulled back. "We should really move this inside."

"We are inside. Can't wait to be more inside." He pulled her back to him for another kiss.

She let him for a moment before asserting, "I meant inside my apartment."

"And I was serious about not being able to wait. We'll be fine. No one can see us thanks to your neighborhood's awesome use of broken street lights." Jeff tried to pull her back to him, but she stopped him.

"You're worried that someone will steal your car."

He only thinly tried to deny it before admitting, "Yes, but can you blame me? This is a really nice car, and a really bad neighborhood. You should move out."

"We've talked about this. I can't afford anything else, and I don't want to rely on anyone. If you're so worried, then why did we come here instead of your place?"

"Because yours was closer to the restaurant and with the way you looked in that short dress, I was really more worried about my—"

"Okay! I understand."

"Annie, we've been having sex for two months. You can say 'penis' now. Or at least be more comfortable with me saying it."

"I just think it's vulgar to talk about."

"I don't remember you having a problem with all the vulgar things we did last night. If I remember correctly, and trust me, I do. You even said some pretty vulgar things."

"My point exactly, it's okay to be vulgar and talk dirty when making love…don't give me that smirk…but it's entirely different to do so in normal conversation." She slapped him across the chest when he smirked, but he continued to smile in a way that said she amused and amazed him at the same time.

"I don't think any conversation where you are currently straddling me could be considered normal, but if you wish to start all conversations this way, you'll get no complaints from me." He raised his hands to cup her face. "However, if it makes you feel better, I will hold off my vulgarity until I get the okay from you. Now, can we please have sex in my car?"

Annie rolled her eyes and laughed, but she didn't resist when he pulled her back for another kiss. His hands slid down her back and reached beneath her dress. Her hands returned to their position beneath Jeff's pants and above his briefs.

Suddenly, a knock sounded on Jeff's window and a flashlight momentarily blinded them before revealing the stern face of a cop.


"We are not calling Shirley. Agreed?"

"Agreed." Annie replied as she looked around the police station. She was nervous about what the arrest would do to her public record, but Jeff had assured her that he knew people who could easily get a public indecency charge dropped. He had already managed to convince the police that Annie shouldn't be charged with prostitution. They had balked a little that a young woman would willingly date an older man for reasons other than money, but with no previous record and confirmation from the pictures in his wallet, they reluctantly agreed to his assertions. After tonight, he swore he would never make fun of Pierce again. At least not when it came to young women choosing to date him.

Now, they had to call someone to post bail because Jeff wasn't carrying enough cash, and this wasn't one of the upstanding police departments that let people post bail with a credit card.

"And we're not calling Pierce, because while I'm certain he's been in this situation many, many times, I don't want him making any lurid comments about you. They'll have to add assault to my charges."

Annie 'awwed' at Jeff's protectiveness. "Let's call Britta. She'll probably understand and won't say much."

"Yeah right. She'll mock me for getting arrested because it wasn't in the name of a good cause; which will be worse than Pierce. And then she'll rant about cops locking up innocent people instead of going for criminals, getting herself arrested and we'll never get out of here."

"Fine. Why do we even need to call someone from the group? What about Alan? Doesn't he owe you, and you'll need him to represent us in court anyway."

"It's Friday night, he's nose deep in strippers, booze, and certain illegal substances. Plus, he'll make comments about you and again, we're back to square one with me and assault charges."

Annie made her disgusted face, and had to admit she'd rather deal with the embarrassment of someone from the group than another encounter with Alan. "What about Troy or Abed?"

"If they both come, they'll decide they want to play cops and robbers. I'll call Abed, at least all we'll have to listen to is his observations instead of Troy's worries about us being locked up in 'the joint' for so long."


It was another hour before Abed showed up with Troy and Pierce in tow.

Jeff stood up as much as he could from the bench where he was handcuffed. He had managed to convince the officer that they didn't need to be placed in the cells with other prisoners. Okay, Annie's Disney eyes had managed that. "What took you so long? And why is Pierce here?" He couldn't really be surprised by Troy's presence.

"Troy and I each wanted to dress up in uniform and bring the other in for an arrest, but we couldn't decide on who would pass most for a usual suspect. I was hanging out with Troy at Pierce's when I got the call. He insisted on coming with us," Abed stated.

Troy stepped forward and hugged Jeff. "Are you okay? Did anyone touch you in your no-no place?"

Jeff gave Troy his 'You're strange, and I want to get away from you as quick as possible' stare. "I'm fine. Annie and I just want to get out of here, so can someone post bail, and I'll pay you back."

"No problem, Jeffrey. I've already set up an account with this precinct." Pierce went speak with the lady cop at the front desk who had seen him coming and quickly switched places with a male cop.


Pierce had posted bail, and Annie and Jeff had finished the process of being released when Britta and Shirley appeared.

"Great! What are two doing here?" Jeff asked.

"Pierce's twitter feed stated you and Annie had been arrested for public indecency. Really, Jeffrey, how could you? And to get poor Annie involved in this?" Britta nodded in agreement with Shirley's assessment.

Jeff stared group down. "Hey, let's get some things straight. First, Pierce, what have we told you about Twitter?"

"If you won't let me tweet my personal thoughts and opinions, what else is there to tweet about?" Pierce asked.

"Not us. Second, why are you following Pierce's twitter feed?" He asked Shirley.

Shirley shrugged her shoulders. "Pierce may be…misguided in his ways, but he is the best at finding campus gossip. Most people assume he can't hear them so they don't lower their voices."

Pierce looked offended before changing his mind and saying "Thanks."

Jeff drew the group's attention back to him. "Whatever. And finally, Annie was a willing participant in our actions."

Annie nodded her head and put on her politician smile. "Yes, even though I did tell Jeff that we should move said actions to my apartment and not in the public area where he had parked his car."

Jeff mirrored her stance and smile. "Well, your actions weren't doing much to convince me you wanted to leave the car. In fact, one could argue that it was your particular actions that got us arrested."

At this, Annie turned to face Jeff and he faced her. Neither forgetting about their audience, but neither willing to break eye contact from each other. "I don't remember hearing you complain about my actions at the time. Or any other time when I had performed said actions of this or a similar nature."

"What reasonable man is going to contest said actions or can claim rational thought when actions of that nature are performed on him. If anyone had the ability to say, notice a cop walking up to the car, it would be the person performing said actions and not the one receiving them."

"I see. So a man like you would rather people believe he can't make a woman forget about thinking rationally than admit he is just as much to blame, perhaps more so, for their arrest as she is?"

"Lawyered." Everyone turned to look at Troy. "Sorry. Abed and I have been marathoning How I Met Your Mother. You two were talking about who's to blame for having sex in Jeff's car which led to the arrest, right?"

Britta spoke first. "I don't understand why you would do this Annie. You're better than sex in a car. Don't let Jeff think you don't deserve more. You are about romance, and you shouldn't let Jeff convince you to do a meaningless quickie because you're afraid that's all he'll ever offer you. " Britta's voice rose at the end of her argument.

As the awkwardness of the moment, washed over everyone, Annie broke the tension. "Thank you for that passionate if somewhat misguided plea, Britta, but this wasn't the first time for Jeff and me."

"What?"

"Annie and I have been dating for three months. And I won't be offering any details on our first time, Pierce, but trust us that it wasn't a quickie in a car."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Shirley asked sweetly.

"We didn't want to deal with the accusations. Plus, we worried about what would happen if things didn't work out and forced you guys to take sides. We wanted to make sure this would last before we said anything which in retrospect we should have done before you had to find out through this arrest." Annie smiled sheepishly. Jeff placed his arm around her and pulled her into a sidelong embrace.

Jeff concluded, "We'll be willing to talk about this tomorrow, but right now we're really tired and want to get home. So if we could get a lift to the impound lot to get my car, we would really appreciate it."


After getting Jeff's car and making plans to meet for lunch and discuss the intricacies of the Jeff & Annie relationship, Jeff and Annie were finally on their way back to his apartment. The drive was spent in silence until Jeff pulled into his parking spot.

"I can't believe you tried to place the blame on me." Annie said.

Jeff shrugged. "Well, I was right. Not about your actions, but it was your fault we were parked in front of your apartment."

"What? You were the one who drove to my place, and you were the one being irrational about leaving the car."

"I wouldn't have gone to your place if you hadn't been living at your place. I wanted my only option to be going back to our place."

"Jeff, I told you I can't afford anything else and…what? 'Our place'?"

"Last month, I asked you to move in with me after I finally got Chang to leave. You spend more time here than your own place. I don't have to worry when you go back to yours. And more importantly, I really like having you around."

She smiled and blushed. "You don't think it's too soon? We have only been dating three months, and I know this is a new relationship level for you."

"It's new level for you too. Why can't we take it together? I'm okay with the firsts we've had so far. I mean you are the first woman I've ever been arrested for public indecency with, and I want you to be the only and last."

Annie moved across her seat and reached Jeff, planting a kiss on him. He pulled her closer to him, and soon, she was once again straddling him in the front seat. After a few moments, Jeff pulled back, "Annie, I was serious about only wanting to be arrested with you, but I don't want it to be tonight."

"Okay, let's move this to our apartment."

The End.