A/N: Aloha! This story has been sitting on my hard drive for years now along with its brothers and sisters; which I hope they enter the spotlight. Per usual, I do not own any of the characters shown below, This is a work of fiction and used solely in a fictitious manner. All credit goes to the creators and producers of OUAT.
She should have known that the peace that settled over the town, over the people, would have been short lived. She should have lost the inkling of hope that everything could or would move on. She should have known that the small staples, the small stitches interweaving into the chaos would be ripped open once again. The never ending, never scarring wound that would cease to heal. She looks into his hazel eyes and sees the shining of hate again. A simple needed mistake, and the end result was a cluster of words screamed at her. When will enough, be enough. She needed to expel the overflowing magic that would cause more harm than good in her. She needed to escape a bit of magic, but as always fate is never aligned with her. The Fates, the Gods, the universe once again laughed down at her human life and again her heart shattered; the last remaining stitch she could possibly hold on to dissolved.
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[20 minutes before]
Regina sat in her family room while brewing a couple potions, mostly to render new protection wards over her house and mausoleum. Typically she brewed her potions in her vault, but she had no want to travel far. She needed the enclosure her house provided with the mixings of safety. As her potions of regeneration, protection, and sleep brewed; her energy levels leveled into a comfortable space. Regina felt as she could breathe once again, the tremblings and aches having stopped. She really did loathe that all magical properties differed so much from those compared to the Enchanted Forest.
Gathering her breath she reclined aback the sofa and tilted her head upwards and with a flick of her wrist, a moonless starry night shimmered above her. Calmness seeped through her pores and ran into her veins, as memories of stargazing flooded her hippocampus. After a few minutes, Regina flicked the stars away and righted herself on the sofa. In a trance like motion she watched over the potions on her coffee table. Two set over a bunsen burner and another resting in ice, all three simmering. Completely set into her trance she never noticed the sounds of keys, the sound of the front door unlocking and opening; nor the set of feet that entered her home. It was only until she heard a gasp and an accusatory shout that she turned and stood from her seat, eyes slightly bulging at the sight of her son.
In a confused and slightly guilty state she looked at her son, while he continued to hammer question after question about magic. Henry did not know that his mother continued to do magic in secrecy, because she knew that at the chance of him finding out he would look at her with disdain as he is now.
"What are you doing?! You promised me you stopped doing magic! You lied!," Henry shouted towards his mother not noticing that she still stood there stunned. This was not the way she wanted him to know that she needed to do magic in small doses to control the overwhelming darkness.
"Henry, let me explain. I need-," Regina tried to do damage control once her fixings were in order, but Henry would have none of it and cut her explanation off.
"No! You don't need magic! Emma doesn't need it! I knew you were EVIL! I knew you could never stop being the Evil Queen. I trusted you! I trusted you, but you are nothing more than the dark Evil Queen. I hate you, Regina." Henry shouted at Regina with the force and hatred seeped into his eyes.
By the time he was proclaiming his hate his words winded down into a cold whisper. Never in the past 6 months has Henry called her by her name. Henry gulped breaths and forced them into his lungs to tamper down the anger running through his body. He thought she was good again, but it was all a lie. She was all lies. The Mother of Deception bored into his heart and eyes.
However, he had it all wrong. Had he given her the slightest of doubt, he would have known that the disuse of magic for one of the strongest practitioners known in the world of realms, physically and emotionally hurt her terribly. That the disuse of magic reaching to its boiling point would lead to a catastrophe by her hands. Without her consent, her dark magic could take over and create absolutely awful situations in which Regina's body would only act as a host. He did not know because he is a child who still needed shielding from certain issues the world offers. He rather demanded her to cut off magic. Hence her secrecy of controlled usage. Except it was not a total secret, certain adults knew. Her once upon a time savior knew and helped come up with a plan to help Regina release her dark magic. Emma and the Charming's had known what needed to be done, so Regina could have control. They had agreed to help her. Her, the Evil Queen, receiving help from the Charming Clan.
Regina knew though that as her caramel eyes set onto those hazel, she lost. She lost everything she willingly fought for, bent for, and almost kneed for, within seconds. She had lost the moment her being the Evil Queen was true, but she held on, and she gripped onto anything to have a sliver of space in her sons heart. Looking into those hazel eyes, she knew she could no longer fight the inevitable. With stinging tears gathering and blurriness encompassing her eyes, droplets of saltwater cascading down her cheeks and falling from her trembling chin. She gazed into those hazel one last time and inhaled a shaky breath. Exhaling a trembling carbon, tears flowing as a running waterfall, she whispered, "Oh, Henry…"
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It does not dawn onto Henry what hurtful and hateful words spewed until he studied the pain filled caramel eyes set straight into his. It is not until he watched the remaining flake of hope fall away and be replaced with utter despair, does he seem to grasp that he has undoubtedly flipped his mothers stability. He wanted to portray regret into his eyes, but it is far too late as his eyes settle onto the streams of tears falling from his mother's eyes. It isn't until he hears his name that he snapped out of his sea of guilt and he wanted her to know he is sorry. He wanted to beg for forgiveness. Henry needed her to know that he does love her. She needs to know. She needs to know he is sorry, so he runs to her.
However, he is too late. He runs into the remaining whispers of purple fog. "Mom!" He faltered in his steps. He searches around the family room, he runs out and runs upstairs to her bedroom, all while screaming for his mother.
Tears adorned his cheeks and mouth, "Mom! Mom! I'm sorry. Please. I'M SORRY. Mom!"
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[Present]
Henry ran through all the upstair rooms, flinging many doors open; he doesn't find her. He hurriedly ran downstairs, leaping from the staircase from the last four steps down and ran into her study. He knew she isn't home any longer, but he still searched for a trace of his mother.
"Mom! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!," is the mantra Henry is yelling throughout the house, into the backyard.
Into the run towards the Sheriff's station, he has tears running down his face and whispering to himself the same mantra. He throws the Sheriff's door open and screams for his Ma. "Ma! Ma! You need to help! I didn't mean to, I swear!"
Emma having heard the force of the door rip open, pulls her concentration away from reading a case file. Sitting upright, until she heard the painfully rough voice of her son yelling for her, does she scramble from her seat and runs towards Henry. The sight she sees of his red rimmed eyes, tear stricken, panic inducing face, along the garble of words stun her for a moment. Quickly coming out of her shock she reaches for Henry and she closed her arms around him. Emma whispers into his ears to 'breathe' and calm, does he do so. Emma continues to hold him to her chest as they sit on the linoleum floor. Henry still has trouble breathing and she guides him into sets of panic coping mechanisms.
"Henry, shh…shh. Keep breathing in, sweetie and out. There you go in and out. Now what is going on, sweetheart. What happened?" Emma calmly whispers to her panic stricken son. Taking note of his countless tear streaked face with wet patches adorning his shirt.
"I didn't mean to, I didn't mean to. You have to find her, Ma. Please, you have to find her." Henry responds, burying his head into his mother's chest, seeking some sort of comfort. However, his mind knows that this isn't the chest and the rhythm of heartbeat he is seeking; he wants his moms, he needs Regina's.
"Find who? Didn't mean what?" Emma curiously wonders. It takes all she has to stop the bombardment of questions as to ask who dare hurt her son. Her magic tingles within her of the prospect of someone emotionally harming her son. Her heart breaks at seeing his completely devastated eyes stare up at her. She can recognize the guilt and pain throbbing from his colored eyes that glaze over in fresh tears.
"Mom…" he brokenly sobs after a few inhales and exhales, he continues, "I didn't mean to yell at her. I didn't mean to say I hated her. I..II didn't mean to call her Evil. It-t just came out. I'm sorry Ma, I'm really sorry. I tried to say I was sorry, but she poofed away. I couldn't find her. I can't find her, Ma." His words come out broken and botched with fresh tears falling from his face, with the last words garbled into her chest as he clings onto her.
"Why?" was all Emma could recall asking her son about his actions. She wondered what triggered such emotions from Henry.
"I saw her do-doing magic. I... I got liv-livid about her lying and I screamed horrible words at her. I…, I didn't mean to Mama… I..." looking onto the floor and shaking his head side to side. Emma knew about keeping Regina's magic use had been a secret, she understood and was helping her friend overcome the darkness. Of course she didn't like excluding that particular decision from their son, but it had to be made. Her heart accelerated in wondering what the brunette was holding on to. She reigned her emotions once more and placed Henry to her chest and cradled his head.
"Shh… I've got you. I've got you. I've got you." Clearing her throat from the knot that had formed, she begun to whisper, "We make mistakes. It's a crucial part of us. We live and we learn. What you did was not okay, I am sure you know and feel that. You need to learn. You must learn, my dear son, to listen before passing judgement. I don't say this to make you feel worse, but your mother has been trying. We knew; she needed to use magic. Your mom was doing it under short spurts to help her control the darkness, Henry. The darkness was hurting her. I saw it and we helped her, Henry." Emma pauses for a bit to control the tears that wish to shed.
She recalled the broken body trembling the night after she felt Regina magically calling for her. She rushed to the mansion and witnessed Regina crying and howling from the pain in a fetal position. She saw the changes in Regina through trial and error. Emma cheered her friend on and their magical escapades. Regina became her mentor throughout the last months.
"It may take time, my dear son. She does love you. I'm certain she will forgive you in time. Mistakes happen, but you need to let the Evil Queen name go. Your mother is Regina, Regina Mills, the mayor of this town. Yes, by name, the Evil Queen. However, who raised and nurtured you was all, Regina Mills. A person who still had love and hope in her heart. Especially, if you are the one who carries the Heart of the Truest Believer. That would never be possible without her love having surrounded you. You need to cease the idea that the world is only made up of two colors, but rather the multiple shades of two. A complexity of multi-colors. You need to see her grey, or her red or purple." Emma takes a small break to allow Henry to grasp her message, she continued, "You will grow, Henry. Now, let's get up. I will take you to your grandparents and I will search for your mother." Emma softly speaks to ear of her son still laying on her chest. Hoping he will heed the words tumbling from her mouth and analyze each one. Hoping that he learn from this mistake and will be able to grow from it.
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Dread formed in her throat,chest, and heart as her thoughts flooded towards Regina. Even after the past couple of months, Regina's only force of goodwill has been for Henry. Emma had acknowledged that the former Evil Queen continued to struggle with the darkness and the one millimeter holding her from the edge of a cliff, was their son. The same son she would lay down her life without hesitation. The son she saw the goodness in. The son who was her light at the end of the tunnel. It was the driving force behind all the things she had recently tried to accomplish.
Being called evil and being told by the son you had raised, nurtured, loved, and cared for ten years, that he hates you probably had reset all of her progress made. Emma realized with horror the possibility of Regina having teetered off the cliff and fallen to the depths; had her last grain of happiness boiled away. The light at the end of the tunnel extinguished. For Regina no longer had a reason to try. She inexplicably knew with dread that she would need to quickly find Regina, and hope. Hope she could save Regina once again.
"Hold on to me, Henry and hold your breath." Emma requested of Henry before she was able to disparate them to her parents loft.
A/N:If you finished, thank you for taking your time in reading my fic. This is my first fanfic story out of many that I have hidden. I hope to share them with you soon.
