DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own Skip Beat! sadly. :(

Also, this is my first Skip Beat! fanfic, so all criticism is welcome! :) Please enjoy I tried too keep the characters as true to themselvse as possible so. :) Please respond and let me know. :) I will read ALL reviews. Enjoy. :) Also, Only this chapter will be this long. All following chapters will be around half. or maybe they'll all be this long. I honestly don't know yet. Okay. enjoy. ^.^


I broke into a run; and this, was all I could do. The warm tears slowly falling down my face, as I ran. Ran away from all the things that I loved. From the life that I had discovered was the best thing to ever happen to me, the voices calling me back. But I knew, that I never could. Not after what I did to them all. How I'd hurt him, hurt her, and hurt HIM. The thought of his sweet smile that had unlocked the final lock on my heart, made the tears fall faster and me run faster. "Moegami-San! Please Stop! It's okay!" I heard someone yelling after me. But it didn't matter. It was too late.

I'd finally ran back to Darumaya, and ran up into my rented room and sat on the floor, and cried to the last of my tears. I sat down looking at my clean simple room. The two posters, a large tattered one of Fuwa Shotaro, a person I'd hated but have come to just ignore, and the other, a smaller but perfectly conditioned one of my sempai, my friend, my... my... "No! No! No! I can't think that. I can't have him. I'm just his junior. He already has someone he likes anyhow..." I said quietly to myself choking on my own tears.

After what had happened on set that day... In that room, when I was Setsu, and he was Cain. Touching him so closely even in character, the intimacy... What was I thinking? I don't know how I'll face him now. After that... I ran, I ran so far away. I can't see him. He'll never speak to me, even though it was a character that's just too far. No. No. No.

oOoOoOo

I watched her run off, "Moegami-San!" I called, but with no response from her. The moment we stepped off the set for filming, she ran off. As fast as she could. It hurt me, that she could hardly face me.. But I can understand, it was... Very out of character for her. I wanted so much to apologize to her, but I knew that if I spoke to her again, that she would never tell me the truth; that she'd just apologize over and over again and change the subject, because that's how she was. That's how the woman I loved was. But, she didn't know I did, and if I told her she'd just think it was a joke. Her heart.. locked because of the terrible thing that Fuwa did too her. But it wasn't all bad, I can't completely hate him... If it wasn't for him I'd have never met her, helped her. But still. I hate that I made her hurt, that I could ever do that. Though I know that I have so many times... So many accidents. The ways I've acted, the things I've done. The tears I've caused her. If I could take each one and take its pain on my self I would. Anything for her. Anything for my Kyoko.

I should've stopped it then. I shouldn't have let this happen. I swore I'd protect her, but did I? NO! God, I was such an idiot. She did it for the role. She didn't do it because she liked me like that. I know that, but why... Why did I want to take her that next step in a fake personality. One I could show her my feelings, but not as myself. As him. As Kuon. I can't fix this myself. I can't get her out of my mind the beautiful girl I'd known since my childhood. The tears she'd cry, the secrets she told me. I'll make them go away, I'll save her from her darkness and the darkness around her. I'll save her from myself. I will defeat Kuon. Or come to terms with him. I choose her over everything.

"Ah Ren-Sa, I'd been waiting on you to come to the car but you never came, so I thought I'd check myself." Yashiro's voice came calling. I turned around masking my anger, my grief, my turmoil, behind the warmest smile I could muster. Yashiro's face melted from a warm one into a look of complete horror and fear. "Ren-San... What happened?" He said cautiously slowly backing up. Stopping my ruse I let my true emotions show through on my face. "Ren.., Come one lets get you to the car. We can talk there." Yashiro said. "Yeah okay..." I replied slowly following him to the waiting vehicle.

We got to the car door, and I grabbed the handle and slowly open the door. I squashed my tall frame into the smaller car and let a large sigh escape my lips as Yashiro walked around to the other door. The thoughts of her running around outside alone filled my thoughts, I worried about her so so much. "God dammit!" I roared throwing my fist down into the dashboard, emitting a loud blare from the horn, not unlike my own feelings. I threw my head down against the top of the steering wheel and just sat there. Tears starting to fall slowly out of my eyes. "Dammit dammit dammit!" I said getting louder each time. I sat up straight fumbling for the key in my pocket. I had to find her. To see if she was okay. I had too. I would find her. I jammed the key into the ignition and threw my foot down on the gas as Yashiro opened the door. I looked at him in the instant before the car sped away a look of surprise and fear on his face and on mine, I knew, the face of Kuon. Not myself. But it didn't matter. I had to find her. The car sped down the road but it was never fast enough for me. My eyes bloodshot, and my ears ringing, my hands sweating from gripping the steering wheel so hard, my mission was to find her. I had to know, know if she was okay.

I drove the car faster and faster pushing its limits. I drove all over town, anywhere I thought she might be. I finally realized that would get me nowhere, and drove to the one place I hoped she would make it too, her boarding house. I didn't know which one it was but I knew it was nearby. I drove up to the street, and threw the car into park and rushed out. There were so many houses, though I didn't know which one. I knocked on every door. Each one yelled at me, and upon realizing who I was even at this late hour, asked for my autograph. Smiling I always complied and moved on as quickly as possible. Finally the last building, a store, called Darumaya. I knew this must be where she was, I hoped. I'd heard her talk about it before. Though, if I invade on her house now, at 1 o'clock in the morning she'd only be angrier...

oOoOoOo

I looked at the poster of Tsuruga-san on the wall, the small poster that had so much importance to me. I walked over to my dresser and pulled out the blue stone the fairy Corn had given me. I held it in my palm, the stone filled with all my pain and sorrow. But still, held the strongest dazzle of Tsuruga-san's magic, his kiss. I held the stone close to my heart and held it there letting it absorb all my sadness. I looked at the Princess Rosa, sitting on her pedestal, dazzling like a thousand suns. The stark contrast of the two stones, was amazing, one light and full of my happiest times, my times with Tsuruga-san, my courage. Then, Corn's stone, the deep blue filled with my saddest and most painful memories and thoughts, yet still managed to be beautiful and full of magic. My tears stopped falling and I looked out the window, at the freshly falling snow. Cleansing me of my fears, and my tears. I fell too my knees on the soft carpet of my room. I could feel the locks on my hearts trying there hardest to stay strong, locked for me. I fell with my back hitting the carpet as well, Corn's stone still firmly on my heart. I thought back to that last day, Corn looking at me with sadness in his shining blue eyes, like the blue of the most dazzling ocean when the sun set leaving everyone in awe. The openness that his young face still had. His sad smile as he saw me that day. The day he gave me his stone. "Kyoko-chan, how are you today?" he said sweetly smiling his warm smile. My eyes glowed full of happiness at seeing my best friend, my prince... "Corn corn!" I cried so so happy at seeing him. "Hello Kyoko-chan, today, I have to go back now... To my own world, back to the land of fairies." That moment, I felt it my heart heave with new weight, as the first lock was placed on it. "Oh... Oh." I said stuttering the tears starting to fall onto my cheeks, falling off my face, and down onto the hamburger kingdom. "No no, Kyoko don't cry! I'll always be watching over you. Here, whenever you're scared, or sad, or anything this will help you." He'd said, so sweetly it sang to my heart as he fished in his pocket and pulled out the large blue gem-esque stone. He placed it so carefully in my open palm and told me, "Hold it up to the light, like this." He demonstrated with his own hand and empty air. Slowly as I moved my hand to mimic his own with the stone in between my two fingers just like his own, the stone changed colors. From the deep dark oceany blue, to a deep purple, to a warm maroon, to a mild warm pink, and finishing its transformation in a beautiful sun yellow. My eyes had widened to the largest they'd ever been and I slowly smiled immensely. He looked down at me, and said, "That's my magic Kyoko-chan. It's in that stone too, it will always keep you safe. And I'll always look after you." He'd said looking down at me as I stared up at him in awe. He looked at his watch, and his warm face molded itself into that of a grimace though he quickly covered it with a smile, "I have to go Kyoko-chan." he said with tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry. I'll always watch you. I'll always be with you. Goodbye." he said smiling as he slowly turned away and walked into the bushes and disappeared. My prince, was gone.

I drew myself out of my reverie, and realized that tears had starting making trails down my face. I sat up slowly pulling the stone down from my heart and cupping it between my palms. I stood up from my criss crossed position, and walked over to my bed, the stone now sitting firmly in my hand, and laid down. I pulled the covers close to my face. Wrapping myself into a cocoon of warmth, and shielding myself from thoughts of Tsuruga-san.

oOoOoOo

I'd sat outside most of the night, sitting on a tiny bench next to a lamppost after getting there, the snow started to fall. The cold became bitter, and I wrapped my light jacket tighter around myself, and waited for her. I wouldn't knock, it'd make her angrier. So I waited, I waited through the cold, and watched the snow fall on the ground. Cars drove by, and the stars shone down on me. I looked at my wrist to check the time, but forgot, I'd taken off my watch, released myself of that burden, I'd chosen my own path. The stars changed patterns, as I leaned my head back and tried to count them all. The night gradually got darker, and the clouds got thicker, and soon all the stars had disappeared from sight. The clouds continued to get darker, the snowfall started getting thicker and the ground became deeply frosted in the icy white snow. I pulled my coat even tighter around myself, starting to shiver from the cold. The wind blew harder, making the snow fly around in tiny typhoons twirling across the ground.

Then, the hail and sleet came,the ice pelting me. What I do for this girl.. I thought to myself. The sharp sleet cut my cheek leaving a shallow stinging cut there. The lights started coming on inside of Darumaya, and I wondered what was going on. Only the top floor had life acting in it. The blinds were pulled down, and I saw the outlines of people on the bottom floor with the lights on trying to pull all the blinds and lock the windows. That was when I saw her. She caught my eye, and I caught hers. A look of true surprise on my face, that I quickly covered with a gentle smile and looked at her. Her face was so surprised. She quickly pulled down the blinds and came outside.

The whirling winds tugged at her clothes, and made her lose her balance as she came towards me. A look that I could not define laced her face. Concern, anger, sorrow... She walked closer towards me and I began to get worried. What would I say? "Tsuruga-san?" she said questioningly. "Yes Moegami-san?" I replied kindly. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? IN THE MIDDLE OF A BLIZZARD?!"she yelled at me. Chuckling softly, I replied, "Waiting for you, I wanted to apologize... While we were acting... I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." I said. The look on her face was pure shock as she started blushing. "You didn't have to go that far!" she exclaimed rapidly stuttering as she spoke. "I bet you didn't eat dinner." she said, looking at me with a soft ferocity in her eyes.

"Come on. I'll make you some." she said, with a new gentleness in her eyes. She held her hand out to me to take, and I accepted. Upon touching my skin, she jerked her hand back with a shocked look on her face. And again, my heart got heavier because I realized more so, that she couldn't even complete her own gesture because of who I was, her senior. That my chance with her was so low... Drawing back my hand, I pushed myself up from the small bench realizing just how stiff my body had become. As I stood up I could head the bones in my back pop. I stood for a minute and brushed off all the snow that had accumulated on me. As I tried to take a step forward, my knees buckled and I fell down onto the snow. "Ren-san!" Kyoko-san exclaimed as I fell down. "Are you okay?" She looked down at me worriedly. Realizing what she'd said she began furiously blushing. "I'm fine. Thank you for your concern Moegami-san." I said smiling at her. I pushed myself off the ground, and started wobbling. I attempted taking another step forward but started falling again, where as Kyoko stepped in and amazed me with her next action. She grabbed me before I fell and supported me as we hobbled into the store. I knew she was cold, wearing only a t-shirt. I pulled her closer to me and into my light jacket. I knew it wasn't much but maybe it would help. She looked up at me surprised. But I ignored her and kept trying to go forwards. Grudgingly I could tell she would go along with it temporarily. I could barely hide the pleasure I felt, having her so close to me, and using my given name. It made me so happy. I smiled softly to myself. We reached the door, and Kyoko pulled it open the warm air like fire too my frozen body. Kyoko brought me to the closest chair and sat me down untangling herself from me and my jacket. She quickly walked out of the room, leaving me alone in the main room.