Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the Harry Potter universe.
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Chapter One: Oh, Baby
Dumbledore was well known for having some rather strange ideas, but sometimes you had to wonder if everything was working properly in the old man's head. There was a fine line between genius and insanity. The staff at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was starting to think that Dumbledore was possibly crossing that line.
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Miss/Mr_____________
You are invited to attend a meeting this afternoon at three o'clock.
It will be held in the Great Hall, and you presence is required.
Students who elect not to attend the meeting will face
dire consequences.
We look forward to seeing you
Professor A. Dumbledore
Headmaster
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Ginny Weasley raced down to the Great Hall for the impromptu meeting called by Professor Dumbledore. She had no idea what was going on, but it must have been an important matter for Dumbledore to call a meeting about it on a Saturday afternoon, several hours past lunch.
There was a large crowd of students gathered outside the Great Hall, trying to cram themselves in through the double doors. Ginny elbowed and pushed her way to the front of the queue and managed to squeeze in along with ten or so other people.
All four house tables were set up, but the tables were hardly full. Ginny glanced up and down the Gryffindor table until she spotted the tell-tale red hair that belonged to her brother Ron; where Ron was, Hermione and Harry could usually be found too.
Ginny sat down beside Hermione and looked up at the head table. Most of the staff wasn't there, but all four heads of house were present.
"Any clue what this is about?" she asked the brunette beside her.
Hermione looked up from her book, startled to see Ginny sitting beside her.
"I have no idea," she said. It was obvious that Hermione wasn't pleased that there was something going on at Hogwarts she wasn't privy to. She was the Head Girl after all.
Ginny looked along the Gryffindor table and spotted a few of her friends. She looked at all the other tables and noticed that only older students appeared to be present; just sixth and seventh years, in fact. This really was unusual.
Eventually the clamor of students entering through the doors lessened and by around five to three, it appeared that everyone who had been summoned was present. After a closer inspection, Ginny realized that every single sixth and seventh year at Hogwarts was there.
There was a soft murmur of chatter amongst the students as they guessed all the possible reasons they had been called down. She saw Professor Snape roll his eyes slightly as he overheard some sixth year Hufflepuff make her prediction.
Harry was sitting across from Ginny, looking tired and exhausted from that morning's Quidditch practice. Ron was slumped down on the bench as well, looking as if he'd rather be in bed. It was November and the weather was quite chilly, which made for some very unpleasant practices.
Ginny looked up towards the front of the hall as Professor Dumbledore walked towards center stage. He had a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye. This meant that he was up to no good.
"Ten knuts says he tries to push house unity on us," Seamus said from somewhere close by.
The boys broke into amused laughter that they tried to play off as coughing when Professor McGonagall eyed them warily.
Dumbledore effectively ignored the boys as he surveyed the hall, which was rather empty, compared to how it was at mealtimes and normal assemblies.
"Thank you for coming," he began, as if he had given them a choice in the matter.
"You all must be wondering why you've been called down today," he continued happily. Several students nodded at him.
Hermione sat with a quill out, ready to jot down every word Dumbledore said, as if on the off chance she might be quizzed on it later.
"We have noticed the increase of students getting detention for doing… inappropriate… things in several of school's janitorial closets, along with the decrease of in the… borrowing of certain potions from Professor Snape's store."
If the situation wasn't so mortifying, one would laugh. Ginny was stunned, as were most of the students there. She understood what the Headmaster was getting at. Apparently one too many couples had been caught "shacking up" in a broom closet, but no one was stealing any contraceptive potion.
Ginny glanced at Hermione, who was staring at Dumbledore as if he had grown a second head. The situation was quite hard to believe. Was the Headmaster really about to give them the… sex talk?
The heads of house were sitting up at the front, not making eye contract with any of the students. Snape's expression was even more emotionless than usual, if that was possible; he stood up straight, stiff as a board. Ginny could tell that he was just as uncomfortable with the situation as the students were.
"We as a staff fear that many of you young minds are losing sight of responsibility as you approach these… endeavors."
"Oh, make it stop, please," Ron whispered, looking pale.
"That is why we have decided to take it upon ourselves to remind you of your responsibilities," Dumbledore went on, a gleam in his eyes. Ginny had a strange feeling at the pit of her stomach, as if something truly horrifying was about to happen.
"We have contacted all of your parents, and they have agreed that we should pursue this next course of action to remind you of your responsibilities."
At this, many of the Slytherin students looked up in surprise. It wasn't exactly a secret that several of the families involved with the Slytherin house weren't exactly fond of Dumbledore, so the fact that their parents approved of something Dumbledore wanted to do came as something of a shock.
Dumbledore didn't acknowledge the looks the student body was throwing him as he launched right back into his speech.
"That is why all sixth and seventh year students have been enrolled in a new class. A parenting class."
Dumbledore had to actually stop talking, waiting for the din from the outraged students to subside. Ginny looked around the table to see several different reactions, ranging from shocked to angry; Harry looked as if Voldemort himself had just walked in the room. Ron and Hermione didn't look much better.
Ginny herself felt mostly stunned, but there was some amusement. Dumbledore really was off his rocker, and it seemed like the heads of house felt much the same way. She watched as Dumbledore raised his hand, silencing the hall once again.
"As I was saying, you will all be enrolled in a parenting class, where you will be in charge of taking care of a baby day and night for an undetermined amount of time. You will receive extra credit for your hard work, but you will be graded on your ability to take care of your child. Of course, we understand that making a child is a two person job. That is why you will all be paired up. Pairs will be assigned."
As those words left Dumbledore's lips, all hell broke loose in the Great Hall. Everyone was shouting and yelling about the news. Ginny processed the whole speech in her head, trying to figure out exactly what this would accomplish.
"Uh, excuse me, Professor?" Hermione said loudly from her spot beside Ginny.
Dumbledore didn't seem to notice, and Ginny watched as Hermione got up off her seat and spoke louder in an attempt to be heard over the noise.
"Yes, Miss Granger?" Dumbledore asked.
"You don't mean we'll be looking after real babies, do you?" Hermione asked hesitantly.
The noise level dropped as everyone turned to Dumbledore to hear the answer.
"No, not real babies, that would be almost cruel… for them. You will have to take care of a doll, but don't let that fool you. It will be a magical doll that will behave as a normal baby would."
The heads of house then started to hand out sheets of paper to students at their own tables. Ginny looked down at the sheet. It seemed to contain a list of rules and regulations involving the project. Ginny watched as Hermione absorbed every detail, making notes on the margins of the page. Ginny took closer look at her own page.
Project Parenthood: Your Guide to getting a successful grade and raising a healthy baby.
It will accompany you to classes, and those students who don't have the same classes as their partner will have to devise a schedule as to who gets it when. It must be evenly split and we will find out if one parent does more work than the other
You will also have to split up the nighttime duties as well. The baby will be switched between the parents every night. The girls will start. All baby supplies will be transported to the other's room at midnight, including the baby.
Your child will not interrupt you while in class. It may make noise, but it will NOT cry while you are in class, so therefore you do not need to worry about having your class time compromised.
You must treat this as a real child, which means it must be fed (we will provide the magical milk) and the nappy must be changed periodically.
Any damage towards the child will heavily impact your grade in this course, so we suggest you not use it as a makeshift Quaffle for Quidditch practices.
You will be provided with a crib per child (yes that means some of you will have twins), nappies, bottles, clothing, blankets and an infant carrier which will make it easier to carry your child around.
You will need to spend time with your partner, as you will be "married" to them. Trading off the child just to get a decent grade will not be acceptable. Both parents will raise their child(ren) and communication between the two is essential.
Ginny stopped reading and looked up at the Headmaster with her mouth hanging open. Was he serious? This was completely unfair. Why were people who had no part in shagging in the broom closet being punished?
She voiced her opinion. "This is not fair."
"Agreed," Ron said, looking horrified as his eyes raced across the page, absorbing every word. If Ron studied his Potions text that thoroughly, he could be getting an 'O' in the class.
"Well, I mean, at least we get extra credit for it," Hermione said as her quill danced across the page.
Ginny rolled her eyes at Hermione's typical answer. She was not surprised that Hermione seemed to have no complaint about all the extra work this would involve.
"Well, without further ado, it's time to begin," Dumbledore said, conjuring a large box beside him. Ginny watched as he reached in with one hand and pulled out a very plastic baby, which wore nothing but a nappy, and Professor Sprout handed him a solid gold goblet similar to the ones they used during meal times.
"Hannah Abbott and Colin Creevey," Snape called out distastefully. He seemed to be reading the names from a piece of parchment.
Hannah and Colin stood up and walked to the front of the hall, where Dumbledore was standing. Dumbledore handed the plastic doll to Hannah and asked both of them for a piece of hair. Ginny watched in amazement as they each pulled a strand of hair from their heads and dropped them into the goblet as he asked.
Dumbledore tapped the side of the goblet and the contents disappeared. He then beckoned Hannah closer. She took a step forward and waited. Dumbledore took his wand and tapped the plastic baby on the head. The whole hall watched as the plastic doll started to morph. A fluff of curly blonde hair covered its head, and its skin became flushed. Hannah almost dropped it when it let out a loud wail.
"Fill out a birth certificate and hand it to one of the professors here before leaving," Dumbledore said as he pulled out the next plastic baby.
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Ginny tapped her foot impatiently as she watched students going up to receive their baby or, in some cases, babies.
Ron and Hermione were lucky enough to be paired up with each other, and now sat in front of her, each holding one of their twin boys. They both looked a little stunned, but it seemed everyone was suffering the same fate. At least their kids weren't crying, unlike several others.
She glanced across the room and watched Lavender trying to get her baby girl to be quiet. She had been paired up with Crabbe who, unsurprisingly, appeared to be completely out of his element.
Ginny looked at Harry, who was still single and childless. She really hoped that he would be paired with her. There weren't very many boys left that she would willingly work with on this.
"Pansy Parkinson and Harry Potter."
A loud shriek came from the Slytherin table, Where Pansy stood with a look of complete outrage on her face. Ginny saw Harry grimace as he stood up and reluctantly made his way to the front.
Ginny let her head fall down and hit the table, keeping it there. She was doomed, she could just feel it. Her last chance at possibly passing this project was with Pansy. Despite the fact that she came from a big family, she knew she wouldn't be capable of taking care of a baby. Not at sixteen. She was the baby of the family herself, and had no experience with children.
"Ginny Weasley," she heard Snape call. She bolted upright and waited for him to announce her fate. She saw a tiny frown cross his face. Oh, this could not be good. "And Draco Malfoy," he finished.
Ginny stood up and glanced across the hall, where furious grey eyes connected with her warm brown ones. She could not believe how cruel fate could be. She watched as Draco Malfoy started to walk toward the front of the room, where he took the plastic baby from Dumbledore's hand.
Draco held the baby as if it was contagious, extending his arm to keep it as far away from him as possible. Ginny found herself standing by him without knowing how she got there. She pulled out a strand of her red hair and dropped it promptly in the goblet, as Draco tugged out one of his platinum blond ones with a scowl.
Soon enough, the doll in Draco's hand started to change into something that looked like a real baby, with strawberry blonde hair.
"Take it, Weasley," Draco said, holding it more securely so it wouldn't fall from his grip. Ginny looked from Draco to the not-so-plastic baby. Her eyes rolled back and she fell to the floor, unconscious.
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So what do you guys think?
I want to thank Fiona for being my Beta and helping me make this readable, so thank you
