Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I did this never would have happened. I guess that's why Kripke is the master of our hearts.
Failure
Sam didn't know how long he'd been sitting on the blood soaked wooden floorboards as he held Dean's torn body in his arms. Time no longer had the same meaning. His brother was gone. He was in hell because Sam could not save him. He had made his brother a promise. He'd promised to get him out of the deal, promised to keep him out of hell. He had failed and Dean was gone. Tears slid down his cheeks and dripped onto his brother. He had failed to save him, just like he'd failed to save Jess and his father.
Sam heard someone come up behind him and he prayed it was one of the demons, prayed for a knife in the back or bullet though the brain. He prayed for an ending that would stop the meaningless existence of his life. A life that had gotten everyone he ever loved killed.
As usual, his prayer was not answered. Instead he heard the woman they'd sent to the basement. One of the three people they had saved. "Oh my God," she gasped quietly.
As the tears spilled from his eyes, Sam wondered why he was allowed to save these people but not his brother, not his family. Why would God think their lives were more important then Dean's? Why?
She was speaking to him saying something about calling for an ambulance, calling for help. He felt her hand on his shoulder attempting to comfort him and he felt her jerk it away at the deep rumble that came from him. He didn't even realize he'd made a sound.
Her husband came into the room. "Jesus," he said quietly.
Sam closed his eyes trying to block out their voices, their presence.
"Daddy…" the little girl cried.
Sam couldn't take it anymore. He stood up cradling his brothers' lifeless body in his arms. He carried him to the front door. The woman got their ahead of him. "Where are you taking him?" she asked opening the door. He ignored her and stepped out onto the front porch.
He saw Bobby coming up the walk way, saw him pale at the sight of Dean's torn and bloody body. He saw the tears fill the older hunters' eyes and spill over. "Take us home, Bobby," was all Sam could say. It was the only thing to say.
Bobby walked up the steps and put a hand on Sam's shoulder as silent tears streaked down his face. "I'm sorry Sam," he told. "I wish…" His hand fell from Sam and his head dropped and Sam knew, he wished the same thing.
Bobby led him down the steps and to the impala. He grabbed a blanket from the trunk. "We need to wrap him up," he told Sam.
"No," Sam told him impassively unwilling to release his brother even for a few minutes.
"Sam," Bobby implored. "Dean wouldn't want blood on the seats."
A hint of a smile crossed Sam's face as he realized Bobby was right. Dean's words came back to him. "Take care of my wheels". Sam nodded. Together they wrapped Dean in the warmth of the grey blanket before Sam climbed into the back seat and sat with Dean's body cradled in his arms.
Sitting in the drivers seat Bobby started the car, heard the roar of the engine and the blare of the music. He reached over to turn radio off.
"Don't," Sam told him. Bobby looked back at Sam through the rear view mirror. It was a bitter thing to swallow but he new Sam was right. He nodded, put the car in gear and drove off into the night.
Sam held Dean tighter, cradling him closer as tears streamed anew from his eyes. He didn't notice he was rocking his brother to the tune of the music. He didn't even realize he was humming along as AC/DC's Highway to Hell blared from the speakers.
A/N: The scene in the episode broke my heart. This story running through my head broke it again. I was crying when I proof read this one so if I missed any mistakes sorry about that. I'll check it again later. Hopefully now that it's on paper I can recover from it. Hopefully it broke your heart, just as it broke mine.
