Title: Down
Characters: Kate, Jack, Sawyer, Sayid, Jin, Miles, Hurley.
Pairing: Jack/Kate
Summary: The Losties make camp the first night after The Incident.
They had decided to go back to the beach. No one was sure why or how the decision was made or who even made that decision.
No one wants to be the one to make decisions. But no one trusts anyone else from the group with their decisions either.
The bomb had exploded. Juliet was dead. They were still on the island.
They walked through the jungle dejectedly in a cloud of despair, heartache, pain, guilt, anger and fear. Barely a couple of words were spoken between any of them for hours.
They made camp in a place oddly familiar yet eerily not.
Like a defeated army mourning its dead but more so its living, they each quietly take to a log, or rock, and get out whatever food each managed to pick on the way.
Hurley gets water for everyone and Miles mumbles something about getting fire wood. Their voices and words disappear into the darkness of the disheartened night before they are warranted a reply. Jack tends to Sayid wounds. He knows that his actions are futile at this point. Everyone knows it. But he stubbornly continues to change the dressing. No one argues with him. They have lost too many of them.
A couple of hours later, the night turns mercilessly cold and Kate tries to get some sleep on her bed of grass and pebbles.
Hurley and Miles' whispered argument about when they are now frustrates her as much as it terrifies her; thinking that once again they do not know what it is this time that they should fear in the godforsaken place.
Sayid's labored breathing haunting her every moment, reminding her constantly that anyone of them can die, at any moment, and there was nothing they can do about it. And maybe they should.
This is our destiny.
Our destiny is to die on this island. We should have all died when we crashed. This is the universe's way of making sure it does what it should have the first time.
Sawyer's silent heartbroken sobs tug painfully at the strings of her heart. She wants to go to him, talk to him, hold him and tell him everything will be ok. But she cannot bear the thought of it. Guilt washes over her every time she looks at him and the first thing that crosses her mind "thank God the one I love is still alive".
She gives up the hope of getting any sleep and moves closer to the fire. She sits with Jin for a while. She tells him about his daughter, what little she does know, tells him how brave Sun had been. But soon her minds wander to Aaron. Her voice cracks and she cannot hide the tears welling up her eyes. She excuses herself, says she's tired and wants to try to get some sleep.
She is tired. Tired, scared, frustrated.
She pretends to sleep for a few hours; pretends that the tears, chokes and whimpers she hears from the men around her, as their own nightmares and demons ravish their sleep, do not bother her.
For the first time in hours she looks at Jack. He sits on the ground his back against the log farthest away from the fire. His body slouched forward, his elbows resting on his knees, his shoulders crushed under the weight of their load and his head dropped bleakly against his chest.
Kate finds herself walking towards him. She remembers the last conversation they had.
Nothing in my life has ever so right, and I just need you to believe me.
Are you with me on this?
Yes.
She makes sure he is asleep before she sits down next to him. His warmth is familiar, comfortable, and she instinctively melts into him. She carefully rests her head against his shoulder and his breath is hot against her skin.
She feels her pulse slow down, the fear that had her heart racing all day suddenly replaced with something else. All the sounds that had been haunting her night disappear and are replaced by the calming sound of Jack steady breathing. And she can finally fall asleep.
Jack stirs next to her and she jumps back.
"I'm sorry," she says in a panic and pulls herself up, avoiding his look, his confused, clouded eyes.
She's stopped from walking away by Jacks hand on her arms. She prays he does not feel the goose bumps he just sent through her, as his hand slides down to grab her. He holds her hand tightly in his and whispers, "stay… please".
Kate nods and lets Jack pull her down. She settles back next to him but he moves behind her, nestling her between his legs. She lays against his chest, her head in the crook of his neck, and he wraps his arms around her, engulfing her body with his.
They spend the next few hours of the early morning holding onto each other and somehow the cloud that had darkened their day earlier is slightly lifted.
Kate knows that the next morning will bring some hope with it.
This is our destiny.
