Death's apprentice
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
…...
Mr. Pines shakes his head at the sight of his five year old son carving cryptograms into a stump.
"That boy ain't right" He said flatly. "Whatever you say dear." His wife says not really paying attention.
The man continues to scowl. "Spending all day chasing non-existent creatures, pondering fairy tales as if they actual theory's...I mean really! How is any of that healthy!?" "Whatever you say dear" Repeats the wife.
The man shakes his head. What this boy needs is a good old taste of reality! The real world!...And I think I know just how to give it to him! "Whatever you say dear." Again repeats his wife...
…...
-And that's how Dipper found himself at an Apprentice convention. "Uh, dad...are you sure this is legal?"
His father just waved off his concerns. "In this state yes...that's why we drove here." Mr. Pines was annoyed. Despite it being legal, no one seemed willing to take his son! Child labor laws. BAH!...Honestly! What did that even mean!?
Dipper meanwhile, was conflicted. On the one hand he didn't feel comfortable leaving home for a couple years to work for a stranger...on the other hand it would keep him away from his depressingly 'normal' family...So for now Dipper was on the fence about the whole thing.
Suddenly, Dipper saw something strange...A mouse wearing a black cloak and carrying a small scythe; looks up to him, waves, and runs off. Curious, Dipper quickly ran after it. His father still trying to convince a cheesemaker to overlook child safety laws to accept his son...Didn't even notice.
Dipper, meanwhile had followed the mouse...to Death. HELLO BOY, CARE FOR A JOB?
Dipper...Being Dipper...Squealed in delight. Death shook his head. RIGHT, THAT'LL BE THE FIRST THING WE WORK ON. The Death of Mouses could only nod.
…...A couple months latter...
Dipper was ecstatic! The last couple months had been great! Sure, he'd have to lie and say he was working for an Undertaker. But his father was just happy to see him go to work!
He loved Death's domain! He could spend his whole life exploring it and never see 1% of it!
He loved his library! So much 'dead' information to learn! He also loved ridding Binky! …..He could do without Albert though, that man was just Cantankerous!
But anyway, today was a great day! Death was going to let him harvest his first soul! In the past couple of months Death had let him watch as he killed a drug dealer, a pimp, and a serial killer! Best of all, before the job your allowed to see how many lives you save by killing him! In this instance Dipper was only given that one bit of information as he was teleported on his way solo!
57 lives saved!? I'm going to be a hero!
…...
-Or not. Thought a now deeply depressed Dipper as he beheld the sight of a red-headed girl crying over her bed-ridden, sickly mother...
…...
TO BE CONTINUED?
Dedicated to terry pratchet, god speed good sir. Your next adventure awaits!
Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!
AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't.
But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?
Love me, flame me, review me
