Silent Love
Just short and sweet. Happened to me the other night, and I felt it had to be put to paper, in case I ever forgot. Naturally, I'm not Max and the guy isn't Kai, but it's nice to pretend, ne?
I'd been bugging him all night to give me a straight answer. If we were going to be serious about one another, and really take this a step further, I needed to know how he felt about me. I had pleaded, lost my temper, nearly cried…and that infuriatingly calm expression had never left his face. Not for one second, no matter how close I was to walking out. He just wouldn't tell me how he felt.
"But why?" I had demanded, at the end of my rope.
"Because, Max," had been the curt reply, "I don't do that sort of wishy-washy talk."
All of this contributed to the fact that now, sitting in his car and driving home, the silence around us was awkward, at best. We were barrelling down the left lane of the highway, and I wondered if he was driving faster than usual because he just wanted to get rid of me. I looked over at the speedometer, but instead of catching the digits, my eyes were drawn to his face. Hard and stern, his gaze set on the road and his mouth was a single, strict line.
'He hates me,' I thought bitterly, sinking lower into my seat.
I observed the skyline far away, watching each of the lights shining brightly in the distance. No matter how often I saw the city from the highway, it was always a breathtaking view. Waterfalls, mountains and forests all held their own beauty, of course, but there was something about a city lit up at night that never ceased to amaze me. It represented the power of humanity at its finest—or its weakness, perhaps. My thoughts invariably turned to destruction, to chaos, and how quickly that modern achievement of mankind could be flattened and destroyed. It seemed as though that which we felt was most powerful and strong was easiest ripped apart.
After all, hadn't I always said that Kai and I would last forever? That I loved him, and he loved me, and that was all there was to it? Apparently I had been wrong in my assumptions, if the fact that he couldn't even tell me how he felt about the relationship indicated anything.
I leaned against the window and squinted through the darkness, trying to make out some of the individual buildings on the horizon. Unfortunately, my breath fogged up the window, so I sighed and tried to wipe the obstruction away. However, I still couldn't see much of anything; it was too dark outside.
Suddenly, I heard Kai turn on the right signal. He swivelled back in his seat, checked for traffic, and then moved into the middle lane. I was confused, as the left lane had been practically empty, and there wasn't any apparent reason for switching lanes. We were nowhere near our destination yet.
"Kai…?"
Instead of explaining himself, he did a second lane change, so that we were now speeding down the right lane, where the traffic was considerably worst. I knew Kai hated driving behind other cars, and so I couldn't figure out what he was up to. Did he mean to pull over?
I looked out the window, and I finally realized that we were now close enough so that I could make out the tall, intimidating structures of the city I had been staring at.
Kai was silent as he continued to drive, but I could feel the mood lighten as though our fight had never taken place. I snuck a glance in his direction, and saw that one of his hands was gripping the steering wheel, while the other was resting on the armrest between us. Before I could think things through, I reached out and grabbed his hand, staring out the window and acting as though nothing had happened.
As I felt his fingers lace themselves with mine, and his thumb began to rub the back of my hand, I knew that everything was going to be just fine.
