A/N: Hi, everyone this is a story inspired by one started by averylovesapril; they haven't updated in a while so I decided to roll with the idea. Here's the original if you guys want to check it out. s/12139418/1/Change-It-All
Six months ago, April would have wanted the stick to turn blue, now she dreaded its very existence. It was staring at her, haunting her every thought while she was in the
divorce proceedings. She couldn't bear to look at her husband, scratches that, former husband because if she did then she would start to cry and that was not what she wanted to do. She had to be strong. He didn't want her, she had messed up too much and that was on her.
"Do you really want this?" She asked him. He kept his head bowed down and didn't answer, "Okay," she said quietly and she grabbed the pen and signed her name. That was it, they were divorced. She got into her car and decided to go on a long drive to clear her head and when she was about to get onto the freeway something came out of her peripheral and the world went black. When April woke up she was back in the hotel before her boards at the bar with Jackson, it was like she had been transported back in time.
"It's me and you right? We're still standing," she remembered telling him that.
"Yeah, me and you." He smiled. She couldn't help but think about what was going to happen that night, if she actually wanted it to happen at all. They had been so good for each other; he knew her body, her ins and outs better than she did. But they had also been so bad, they had to deal with things that most couples never get over, and they didn't. Was it worth it to go down that road again, could she make it right this time?
"Yeah, well Ted Stevens likes himself a redhead," Kyle, the resident at Case Western who April "stole" a job from drunkenly slurred to her. That was it that was the last straw, so she turned around and punched him straight in the nose.
"April," Jackson gasped, wide-eyed, he had never seen her take such control and it honestly turned him on a bit and before he could understand what was happening, April leapt forward and started to go at the drunken surgeon.
She screamed, "Yeah bitch, I wanna go." He had to use every ounce of strength he had to hold her back; she was kicking and screaming like a banjee, "Yeah dumbass, I'm actually the smartest one here, that's why I got your job next year." Causing Jackson to go, "What?" confused at her remarks, he was still having trouble holding her. The whole thing only calmed down when Dr. Richard Weber came to the bar and yelled at everyone to get to his or her rooms and if they didn't then they'd be barred from the test.
"Do I go for it?" April thought to herself, "Do I dive into this, again?"
April and Jackson walked up to her room, which was across from his. Tomorrow was the biggest and most important day of their surgical careers; their residencies had only been training them for this day. One day, one test determined if they were fit to be surgeons. April knew she had failed before, how much her co-workers ridiculed her, how she was called the dud by the incoming interns. It wasn't like it wasn't deserved, she panicked during her test, she even had to go to the men's bathroom to clean herself off because she was sweating so hard and that's where she found Jackson and they had round two in there. It was the greatest experience she had ever had in her life, second to marrying him. She remembered the way he spoke to her, he made her feel heard, sexy, tended to, his voice was soft and calm. He guided her, he took his time, and it was the most magical experience she had ever had. She knew sex was supposed to feel good, she had had orgasms before, but there was something about someone else being there, talking to you, learning you, it was something that a vibrator couldn't replicate.
"This is it, this is where you kiss him," she thought to herself.
Jackson was still on a high from what had happened in the bar, he had never seen that kind of side from April before and he had to admit that it was incredibly sexy. He had always recognized that she was an attractive woman, but he had put her into the friend box so long ago. Not that it was a bad thing, he had always been with other women and she was, well she was April. His best friend. The person he told everything to, he didn't want to ruin anything by having sex with her, by even thinking about having sex with her.
"Oh, my God. That was amazing," she panted.
"You just punched a guy," he responded.
"I punched a guy."
"You were freakin' crazy in there."
"Jackson we are gonna do this," she pause, "I-I-I can feel it." And then she reached in to kiss him, just like before, it was the greatest kiss she had ever had in her life. It was filled with passion, adrenaline, and also the knowledge that this kiss would lead to so much more. It would lead to so much good, a marriage, two children, careers they loved, despite all the bad that she knew would come out of it, it seemed worth it.
"Should I not have done that?" She asked, "I, um, I… if you want me to stop, just say so, and I'll stop."
Jackson couldn't deny that the thought had already crossed his mind that night, that he wanted her in a way that he had never wanted her before, "I just… you're… The way you're kissing me right now, you just… You're a virgin. You're a virgin." He tried to tell himself that he wasn't going to be the man she did this with, she had been explicit about wanting it t be with her husband, with a man that she was in love with. And yes he loved her, as a friend; maybe he could love her as something more, but now?
"Yes because my whole life since I was a kid, I had this idea of how my life was supposed to be, these rules that I was supposed to follow, but I'm not a kid," she paused, "I'm not the same person I was when I started my residency. And if something feels really, really, good, it can't be bad, right?" She looked up at him, "Jackson, it's okay. Really. It's okay." And with that he melted into her and picked her up, she wrapped her legs around him and started kissing him passionately.
"April," he began, "Are you sure you want this?" He was still feeling slightly hesitant, because he knew he wanted her so badly, his body was aching for hers.
"Yes," she whispered, "I want this." She pulled her shirt off over her shoulders, he had seen her change in the locker room many times before but he had never actually taken the time to look at her, inspect her skin, notice her perky breasts, everything that made a woman beautiful. She was a beautiful woman, and she was going to be his tonight. He had begun to undo her bra, revealing her breasts, and then he brought her to the bed, never failing to make eye contact. His quickly took his shirt off and their bodies collided, it was like they were meant to fit together. Their lips never stopped touching, and soon his started to make their way down her neck. He kissed her, causing her back to arch, and then he explored further down, kissing her navel and more.
"Oh," she moaned slightly, she was still slightly embarrassed and didn't want to be too loud, but Jackson honestly liked it. He liked hearing her cries of pleasure, especially when he licked her clavicle; she had gone crazy for that, "Right there." She had been used to his touch, for years, so she knew exactly where she wanted him to touch her, to lick her bare flesh.
"Jackson," she looked up at him, "Go slow?" She asked. She remembered the first time that they had had sex, how he had been so gentle, calm, considerate, and she remembered how good it felt. That pulsating feeling an orgasm gives you, how it runs through your body like a wave, a wave that she became very addicted to. No one in her life, not even her ex-fiancé Matthew made her feel the way Jackson did, ever.
"It's okay," he responded. His words for short, but they were the most comforting thing April could hear and that point, "I got you." He was on top of her and they made love, he put himself inside of her, it was unlike anything she had ever felt before. The only way to describe the experience was that it was incredible.
"Wait for it," he instructed, it was hard because that pulsating, sinful feeling she was having was running through her body, and then it was time. They orgasmed at the same time.
"Is she liking this," he thought? He had closed his eyes a while ago, it was habitual for him, but even so he couldn't help but imagine her soft skin, skin that he was holding. Skin that was brushing against his.
"Am I doing this right?" April wondered. She knew the motions, she was a doctor after all, she knew where the parts were and what their jobs were, but she wasn't clear as to how to react. Was she believable? Was she good? Would Jackson want to do it again? They finished he rolled over to the other side of her, last time she had instructed him to get out due to her minor freak out about Jesus, but this time would be different.
"That was, that was something," he leaned over to look at her. The sheets she had pulled over herself, confusing Jackson a bit, covered her breasts. He had seen them and they were amazing, he was confused as to why she never wore low cut tops because, damn.
"Stay with me?" she pleaded softly, last time she had kicked him out, making him feel, oh God she didn't even consider how he felt. She was too concerned with breaking her vow to Jesus that she didn't even think about him. That was the main problem in their relationship. Jackson never wore his heart on his sleeve and April wasn't the best at communicating, which was a recipe for disaster.
"Okay," he stated as he wrapped his strong arms around her petite frame. April had been used to sleeping with him, they had been married for a few years, she knew exactly how to position her body so they were the most comfortable. But being in his arms felt like home, it felt like she was coming back to everything she needed. She closed her eyes and thought to herself, "I love you, I'm so sorry." Right now, the man who was holding her was oblivious to all the pain she would cause him. All of the hurt, the loss of their son, her leaving, their divorce, and the man whose arms were wrapped around her was her best friend, nothing more. Right now, this is what she wanted. To fall asleep in his arms, with his chin pressed softly against her head.
He didn't realize that her body would fit so perfectly in his, he had his arms wrapped around her and he was spooning her from behind. He had never been this up close and personal with his best friend before, and it felt amazing. He smelled the top of her head, clearly she used cherry scented perfume, and it was the best thing he had ever smelt. If he could stay wrapped in her arms forever, he would, he would never move.
Present Day
"What do we have?" Dr. Kingsing from Seattle Pres asked his team.
"Young woman looks to be about 30, really bad car accident. Keeps going in and out of consciousness."
"Okay, let's go," Dr. Kingsing ordered. They worked tirelessly on April, trying to make sure she made it. They stabilized her, but she was still in a coma, so they called her emergency contact that was listed in her phone.
"Hello, is this Dr. Karev?"
"Yeah? Who is this?"
"I'm Dr. Kingsing from Seattle Pres. We have April Kepner here, you're listed as her emergency contact?"
"I am?"
"Yes. Is there someone else that she'd rather have come?" Alex thought about his last conversation he had with April, and he knew that she and Jackson were not on good terms, so he decided not to say anything, "No. No, I'm the one you should have called. How is she?"
"Not great, she's out of the woods for now, but it'd be better if you got here and soon."
"I'm on my way," Karev answered.
Just as Jackson Avery was walking into the hospital, with his head sulked and looking towards the ground, he saw Alex Karev bolting out of it.
"Karev, where are you going?"
"Gotta run, emergency," he shouted back.
"You know the emergencies come through the E.R. right?" Jackson quipped back.
"This one's different. I gotta go," he turned to run to his car, "Oh yeah, how'd the divorce proceedings go, you and Kepner are officially divorced right?"
"Actually, no. I never signed the papers. We're still married." Karev wanted to turn around and drag Jackson into his car to go and see April, to see his wife. But, he didn't know if that was what April wanted, she loved Jackson more than anything but she didn't trust him. Karev made a split second decision, "Oh fuck it," he thought.
"You don't want to go in there, she won't be in there," he began, he didn't know exactly how to explain to Jackson that April was in a coma.
"Yeah I know, she usually likes to take long drives when she's stressed. It helps her to clear her head. But I know we won't be able to avoid each other forever," Jackson sulked.
"Jackson," Karev said with urgency, which caused the plastic surgeon to look up at him, Karev didn't even need to say anything more for Jackson to get the message.
"What happened to her?"
"She's at Seattle Pres." Jackson didn't even listen to the rest of Karev's sentence; he ran to his car and sped all the way there.
"April Kepner-Avery? Is she here?" He begged the nurse at the entrance of the E.R., "She was admitted four hours ago?"
"Sir, sir, I'm going to need you to calm down, what is your name? Are you family?"
"My name is Jackson Avery, and I'm her husband."
"Okay, she's up in the I.C.U., Dr. Kingsing is her physician and I'll have her come down and talk to you about your wife's condition."
Jackson sat in the waiting room, waiting patiently, or about as patiently as one could in this instant. What had happened to April, why wasn't he the one to know first, would she be angry with him for coming? The thoughts raced in his mind.
"Dr. Avery?" A young woman asked.
"Yes, that's me," he got up to face her, trying desperately not to cry, "My wife. How is she?"
"She's doing well, she has a couple of fractures on her right leg, which we expect to heal. But for reasons we cannot explain, she's in a coma. It doesn't seem like she suffered any head trauma, so we think it's her body coping to an emotional trauma. Physically she'll recover, but mentally, it's going to take time."
"Can I… can I see her?" He whimpered, he was scared to see her knowing that if he hadn't suggested a divorce, they wouldn't have been at that lawyer's office, and she'd never think he wasn't her husband.
"Sure." She lead him to her room, where he saw her lying peacefully, there was a cast on the lower half of her leg, but other than that nothing else seemed out of the ordinary, "Oh, and Dr. Avery I forgot to mention downstairs, but your wife is pregnant."
"Pregnant? That's impossible."
"She's about six weeks along, we're not sure if the fetus can survive the trauma she's endured, but we're going to keep monitoring it. If it comes down to it though, we will need you to make a decision."
"Crap," he thought to himself. Jackson knew exactly what decision he would make, as a medical professional he knew the risks and the rewards that came from a pregnancy like this. He didn't want to treat April like she was an incubator. However, he knew her, and he knew that the only thing she would have wanted would be to keep the baby, no questions asked. If she knew about this, which he had a sinking feeling that she did before the accident, she'd murder him if something happened to the baby and he caused it. He was going mad with rage over the fact that she didn't tell him, because he wouldn't have even brought her to the lawyer's office, they could have discussed things, been better, but now she was lying in a hospital bed completely unaware of the husband that she left behind who was holding her hand and crying.
"Wake up, baby, you've got to wake up. I'm so sorry, I never should have said all of those things, I need you April."
"That test kicked my ass," Karev complained.
"Well, I kicked that test's ass," Cristina challenged back.
"Okay, when do the results come out again?" Avery wondered, "I need to know when to book a plane ticket to Greenland."
"We're supposed to get e-mails by the end of the day," April answered, "But I'm sure you passed. You're an Avery," she smiled at him. Enough for him to notice, but no one else was the wiser. Their bathroom quickie had been lustrous, right down to him picking her up and doing her on the bathroom sink. It was better than last night because she knew what to expect and he knew what to expect with her a little bit, and he'd be lying if he didn't say he wanted to do it again. He wanted to do it over and over, just sitting across from her now and not being able to touch her hand, graze his hand over her soft leg, run his fingers through her tasseled red hair, was torture.
"Wait, I just got an e-mail," Meredith screamed, "I passed! Check yours," she urged Cristina. As they all checked their e-mails like nervous bunny rabbits, they all let out a relieved sigh; each one of them had passed their boards.
"You going to finish that?" Jackson asked April, who was dancing like a maniac in the middle of Meredith's living room. She had remembered this party from last time, where she had failed her boards and was drinking to drink the pain away. The embarrassment of being the only one out of her friend group to not pass to boards was too much to take, that she actually escaped to Moline. They all probably thought she had had a nervous breakdown, doubtful they would have figured out she and Avery had had sex.
"Yes," she chugged the rest of her mixed drink, she thought it was a gin and tonic but she wasn't sure anymore.
"You're really letting loose tonight," Jackson started to say.
"Jackson," she stopped dancing and grabbed him by the shoulders, partially for balance and partially because she wanted to be close to him, "We're no longer residents. We just passed the biggest tests of our lives, and I want to celebrate," her arms made their way around his neck and their heads were practically touching one another's. If no one else were in the room he would have kissed her right then and there, "Do you want to celebrate?"
"I, uh," she looked at him longingly, "Yeah I do." He took her by the hand and guided her out the door, "I'm going to take April home, I think she wants to call it a night," he shouted.
"Okay, night Jackson! Night April," Meredith called back. As soon as the two of them left, Meredith motioned for Cristina to come over, "When did they start doing it?"
"Who start doing it, Meredith what the hell are you talking about?"
"Kepner and Avery. Did you see them? They're doing it. I know it."
"Virgin Mary and pretty boy, no?" Cristina gasped.
"What?" Alex asked as he butted in to their conversation.
"Nothing, Alex," Meredith tried to say, but then Cristina interrupted her, "Kepner and Avery are doing it."
"Kepner?" he exclaimed, unfortunately now the cat was out of the bag and whatever April was hoping would happen with her and Jackson's relationship, privacy was not going to be a part of it.
