Lots of Dawson's Creek sappiness and mushiness. You have been warned
Disclaimer: I don't own HP
Unlikely
It's unlikely that we'll ever be together. Highly unlikely. Very unlikely. Yet still I pine for him. I still love him. You might not think that I get love, I'm too young, I don't know enough, I haven't seen enough. I've seen more in the years that I've lived then people two times older then me. He still thinks that I'm not old enough to know love. Maybe not that I'm not old enough, just not mature enough.
Maybe he had a point about that though. I change my hair color every week. I get along better with people who are 16 then with people my own age. Except him. I've always gotten along with him. Accept whenever in the heat of the moment I let those three words slip, "I love you."
Maybe he'll realize that I'm not just some little girl anymore. I've grown up. I'm thinking he's realized this though. I mean obviously he appreciates my womanly assets. Otherwise, there would be no heat of the moment. Lately though the kisses, and nuzzling, and sex, and long conversations, and everything that comes with trying to be in a relationship (if you can call what we have a relationship) has come to a grinding halt. Maybe he's trying to push me away?
"Tonks." I practically jump out of my seat. Speak of the devil and so shall he appear. Or think in this case. "Are you all right?"
I answer in a very vague, "Yes." He nods, and just as he was about to walk out of the room I add, "Actually Remus, I'm not all right." Remus stares at me, a confused look on his face. He sits down in a chair facing me, just as he's about to ask the very obvious question of "What's wrong?" I answer it for him. "I love you Remus. Don't interrupt me, I'm going to rant about this until you realize that it's true. I don't care if you're a werewolf, or the age difference, and I know you're poor. Do you think I care?"
"You don't love me Nymphadora." He says, keeping his face blank. Emotionless. "It's unlikely you even know what love is, you're so young."
I bolt up out of my chair, my fists clenched. "I don't know what love is? Is that what you think? Because I haven't experienced enough loss, or enough of life to know what love is? I know that every time you walk into the room, whether you've just come back from doing something for the order and look worse then a beggar, or you in the fanciest dress robes a man could buy, my heart starts beating tens times faster then it had before. You could have been a delusional pixie and I would still love you. That whenever I think about losing you my hair turns black. That whenever I look at a life without you it seems to look a lot bleaker, and a lot less cheery, and the chance of us ever winning this war seems to go down." She lowered her voice, finally realizing she was yelling. "If that isn't love, then I must be insane."
He just stood there looking at me. I couldn't read his expression. That scared me. I could always read his expression. Then all the sudden the chair was knocked over, and he was gripping me so tightly. I was smashed into his chest, and I could feel his nose buried in my hair. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to breathe in a few seconds if he didn't let me go. "Nymphadora Tonks, I love you. So much. So much." I could feel his body being racked by huge sobs. "I've lost so much Tonks. So much. I don't want to lose you too. I didn't want to grow attached to you."
I started crying as well, laughing at the same time. "That's stupid." I said my voice muffled into chest. He let go a little and looked at me, and I could tell that he had meant every word of what he had said. "That is really stupid."
"I know. Which is why this isn't real Nymphadora." He looked at her and shook her shoulders. "Wake up."
I open my eyes, and found the same face from her dream staring at me. "I'm awake." I said groggily.
"Where you having a good dream?" Remus asked her as he walked out of the room.
"It was a great one!" I called out after him, then she added to herself; "But unlikely."
Like it? You thought that was actually going on huh? HAHA! You all lose! Please review.
