Killing Emotions
Healer
Hello! Sorry for not updating my other fics first, but while watching my STV DVDs, I couldn't help this plot from taking control over my mind so in order to be set free and be able to carry on with my life and job and hopefully my other fics, I had to let it be born and create this.
This is an attempt of incursion into the Startrek fandom, it is as you know by being here, a Startrek Voyager fic and it is a femlash, featuring Janeway and Seven of Nine as a couple in a kinda AU sort of way, at least in part. So, if you don't like, please head somewhere else.
It is set after and during "Killing Game" (Episodes 18 & 19 of Season 4).
Keep in mind that I do not own Startrek or its characters, so if you recognize any of them, THEY'RE NOT MINE. If I did own them, believe that in the Voyager series, Seven and Chakotay would not have ended up together. And there certainly wouldn't exist a DS9 or Enterprise series. (All this means is that I am not making money out of writing this, I'm only doing it for the pleasure of sharing a piece of my mind with you all)
I used almost everything that was featured on "Killing Game", I also used quotes from "Prey", "The Omega Directive" and I believe that also from "Random thoughts"
Remember to leave your reviews…
Killing Emotions
Healer
Captain's log, Stardate 51715.2. The damage to Voyager has been extreme. Both sides have taken heavy casualties and it's clear that no one is going to win this conflict. The fighting has reached a standstill and the remaining Hirogen have agreed to negotiate a truce.
"What is this?" the new appointed Hirogen leader asked me eyeing the optronic datacore on my arms
"An optronic datacore." I informed him "You can use it to create holodeck technology on your own vessels." He stared reluctantly at me "I made a promise with your leader, before he died, that I would give this knowledge to the Hirogen. Take it."
"His ideas were unconventional. I do not share them."
"Was he any more unconventional than you are?" I asked him "Calling a cease-fire with your prey? Only a few days ago the thought of speaking with us on equal terms would've been inconceivable, but here we are." I pointed out "Accept this trophy." I tried to prompt him "You can use it to create a new future for your people. At the very least, you can hang it on your bulkhead."
He finally took it and the Hirogen then left to their ships.
"Janeway to sickbay"
"Go ahead Captain" I heard the Doctor over the com system
"How's she doing?" I asked him
"She's awake, but you might want to see her for yourself"
"On my way" I told him walking away from Cargo Bay Two "Tuvok, I want a complete account of the crew" I ordered him still walking toward the turbo lift "Chakotay, take the bridge"
Janeway's (Katrine's) POV
This war has gone on and on for what seems like forever. I never really wanted our small town to be caught up in the middle. But now that it's done I certainly can't cross my hands and do nothing, not when the allies are about to come to our aid, now that I'm the leader to an Underground resistance cell, all of whom count on me; and especially not now that I have her in my life.
"Wrong, would it be wrong to kiss, seeing I feel like this. Would it be wrong to try? Wrong, would it be wrong to stay, Here in your arms this way, Under this starry sky? If it is wrong ..."
I was watching her sing. Somehow I felt that we could relate to this song. However, my musings would have to be set aside since I had a job to do as owner and hostess of this establishment. Le Coeur de Lyon.
"Welcome to Le Coeur de Lyon! I'm Katrine. The first round is with my compliments, on one condition. You leave the war outside." I said welcoming the newcomers "More escargot for table nine." I ordered to my people while walking to the table I was sitting before "Jacque, no lady tonight? Oh, we'll have to see what we can do about that." I pointed out to a regular "Forgive my neglecting you." I excused myself with my potential sources, sitting with them again "Now, where were we? Ah, yes, my latest adventure in Paris." Then I noticed my second in command nod toward the entrance, where I could see Nazis coming in "I'm afraid I have to neglect you again. Excuse me." I said heading straight to Tuvok behind the bar
"That's him." He discreetly said while wiping some glasses for good measure
"Our new Kommandant?" I asked for confirmation
"British intelligence believes he's been sent to oversee the occupation of the city."
"What's his history?"
"He served with Rommel in North Africa and Schmidt in Poland. He is a formidable military strategist, notorious for his cruelty."
"Ah. Let's make him feel at home. Send him a bottle of Chateau La Tour. My compliments."
"The '29?"
"I hate to waste good wine. Give him the '36."
"As you wish."
I then focused my attention again on her. She who somehow willed me to keep on with this double life. She who encourages me every day without even been aware of that, to have faith and believe that the Germans will be defeated and France will be free.
"...and I have waited so long. It must be right, it can't be wrong." She finished her song and I couldn't help but smile at her "Merci. Be generous to Claude this evening. Without him, my voice is empty. Good evening." She said stepping down from the stage and heading in my general direction, where a nazi dared to touch her, holding her against her will by her arm
"Sing." The nazi demanded
"Tonight's performance is over. Return tomorrow." She said coldly
"Now." Continued the nazi with his demand
"Remove your hand." She demanded then, not caring about the scene she was causing, or the trouble we could get in with them if she didn't comply, or the fact that my heart was racing in fear for her life
"Obey me, or I will hunt you down and your bones will adorn the bulkhead of my ship." Said the same officer, which made me scowl at him
"Sit down and play the game. In this setting, we have no ships. We are an ancient race of soldiers intent upon conquering this world. Play the game." Said the Kommandant. His comment seemed odd, we'd have to talk about this on our next underground meeting, however I had to stop this from escalating right now.
"Now, now, what's this?" I asked approaching them "Mademoiselle LeNeuf will be happy to sing another song. Just give her a few minutes to freshen up." I said calmly
"It's late." She said
"Freshen up." I ordered her with a stern look
"Very well." She finally agreed and walked toward Tuvok
"Kommandant Karr." I addressed him
"You know me."
"Your reputation precedes you." I simply said "I'm Katrine. Le Coeur de Lyon is my establishment." I said gesturing around "The first round is with my compliments, on one condition. You leave the war outside."
"I wish to speak with her. Alone." Demanded the nazi at his side, referring to Anne LeNeuf
"Charming gentleman." I said indicating his subordinate, trying to divert his attention from Anne
"He is disoriented. Your world is unfamiliar to him." Said the Kommandant
"He'll be comfortable soon enough. The arms of friends are open to all." I countered
"I've heard otherwise."
"What do you mean?"
"I understand there is opposition to our presence here, among your citizens."
"The Resistance? In Paris perhaps, but this is a small city, defenceless. We've learned to be a little more diplomatic. When this war is over we want to remain on good terms with the victor."
"Whoever that may be."
"Whoever that may be." I confirmed
"Your city may be defenceless, but it's crucial to the war. Any ground assault into Germany must pass through this province. The Resistance will come here."
"If they do, I'll tell them what I tell everyone. Leave the war outside."
"Excellent." He said smirking while a new nazi soldier approached him
"Kommandant, I've been informed there's a problem in the Engineering section. The warp plasma network has become unstable."
"What's he talking about?" I asked curious about this information, which might prove useful if we got the hang of it.
"It need not concern you." He said "To the hunt." He toasted
"The hunt?" I asked intrigued
"For the Resistance. I shall take great pleasure in tracking them down and making the kill."
"Au revoir." I said turning around
It was late at night, only Anne, Tuvok and myself stayed at Le Coeur de Lyon. Anne had just finished going over our profits of the day.
"How'd we do?"
"Insufficient for a Saturday night." She started "Twelve hundred forty seven francs and eighty one Reich marks."
"Well it should be enough to buy an oscillator to extend the range of our radio." I mused "First thing tomorrow morning I want you to take a little trip to the countryside. There's a Monsieur Goulot who has a cottage just past the third bridge. He's got a wine cellar full of vacuum tubes. Tell him we need a high frequency oscillator. Offer him three hundred francs but don't go any higher than five hundred." I asked her
"We have more pressing needs." She countered
"Such as?"
"Explosives. We need a launcher that can fire armor piercing grenades."
"Planning on blowing up a German tank?" I asked amused
"If necessary."
"We're not trying to build an army here." I reminded her
"Maybe it's time we did." She said hotly "Three more German battalions have occupied the city and a Panzer division is holding position eleven kilometers away. When the Americans arrive and the fighting begins I don't intend to be standing next to a piano singing Moonlight Becomes You."
"The Americans won't even be able to approach this city without our help, and if they can't liberate Sainte Claire the assault into Germany could fail." I tried reasoning with her "We need to be gathering information about German troop movements and relaying it to Allied Command."
"I'm tired of lighting the Nazi's cigarettes and laughing at their jokes." She started looking me directly in the eye. "We should be helping the Allies by assassinating these pigs."
"The moment we start shooting we expose ourselves." I snapped "Right now, no one suspects us, and I am not about to risk our entire operation because you've suddenly developed a nervous trigger finger."
"That is your opinion, Madame." She stressed clearly angered.
"I'm the leader of the movement here and right now my opinion is the only one that counts, so get the oscillator." I ordered her, not wanting this nonsense to continue "I think we're all feeling the strain. It's been a hard four years, but believe me, the Third Reich is feeling it too. We just have to hang on a little while longer." She huffed but remained quiet. "Word from the Americans is going to come any day."
"Perhaps." She said stubbornly heading out. I sighed, knowing I'd have to seek her out tonight if I wanted this relationship to work. We had only been together for a few days and it was proving to be quite challenging. Dismissing this thoughts for later, I turned my attention then to Tuvok who had approached
"Again?" he asked knowingly
"Again." I sighed "Why is she so adamant? What she's proposing would put us all at risk."
"Maybe that's her intention."
I couldn't believe what I heard, he did not know I had acted upon the growing attraction I felt for Anne, or that Anne had agreed to take this continuous flirting we'd had going on for months, to a serious relationship. "If you have suspicions, my old friend, let's hear them." I demanded him
"From the beginning, she's been argumentative, and on more than a few occasions she's disobeyed your direct orders."
"She's headstrong. Typical of the underground." I told him, not finding anything else to excuse her actions
"Nevertheless, her behavior has threatened our identities."
"She's the only munitions expert we have," I finally said "and she can carry a tune." I reminded him smiling "We need her." I couldn't admit out loud that it was me who needed her most. "Let's keep our eye on her." I conceded when he looked at me "Have her followed for the next few days. If she is a Nazi infiltrator we'll have to eliminate her."
My heart ached just thinking about that. I couldn't understand how this harmless attraction I felt for her, had changed and transformed in just a few months into this need to have her in my life and keep her as safe as it was possible given our positions as members of the resistance.
Seven's (Anne LeNeuf's) POV
Katrine was clearly unhappy with me by the time I left Le Coeur de Lyon. I could not understand the logic behind her decision to get an oscillator instead of new weaponry. If word of the Americans would come soon as she expected, we needed to be ready to aid them in order to get rid of the Germans here.
I walked the few blocks to my home. A small apartment I had inherited from my uncle who had raised me, and who had taught me the basics of life and who shared with me the intricate knowledge of fire and explosions.
I was surprised to see Katrine at my doorstep by the time I arrived home. I looked curiously at her while fumbling with the keys. She kept quiet so I opened the door and held it for her to come in. When I closed it I had barely turned around and I found myself being held in a tight embrace with Katrine's face buried in the crook of my neck.
"You just don't get it, do you?" she asked me as soon as I returned the hug
"I am unsure of what you are talking about"
"I am terrified" she sighed
"It is reasonable being scared when you find yourself in the middle of a war" I told her stroking her back
"I know, but now it is different" she countered tilting her head so she was looking me in the eye
"How so? This is war"
"If it was just me and the Resistance I would be scared for their lives, being their leader I am responsible for keeping them safe." I nodded but kept silent "Now that you are in my life I am terrified to lose you"
"You are being irrational" I sighed and walked us to sit on the couch "I have been in your life for almost a year now, and you are not going to lose me"
"Smartass" she said and playfully hit my shoulder "I meant now we are a couple" she said leaning her head on my shoulder "And if you do something rash and reckless I might lose you"
"Then I will try not to do anything rash and reckless"
"So no more plans to blow up a German tank?"
"I still believe we should get explosives and weapons first. But I will comply and get us the oscillator"
"Thanks" she said tilting her head and placing a kiss on my jaw "I love you"
"As I you" I assured her placing a soft kiss on her lips
"I should leave and let you get some rest" she said standing up. I held her hand not moving from where I was
"Stay" I asked her which gained me a curious look from her "Please" I hastily added
"We agreed not to rush things"
"It is not rushing" I countered standing up now "It is not safe to leave at this time, especially if you are alone" She looked at her watch and a brief look of fear crossed her eyes
"I'll take your couch then" she stated after a moment
"That is not logical. You need to rest too. My bed is big enough to fit us both quite comfortably"
She hesitated, but finally nodded her agreement.
The sight that greeted me as soon as I stepped into sick bay was far from encouraging. Seven was curled up in a corner, hands pressing tight against her head.
"What is it Doctor" I asked placing my own hand on Seven's shoulder, which made her look up at me. A small smile formed on her face, though she still wore a pained expression.
"I am sorry they captured us Katrine" she gasped then in pain.
"Doctor!" I demanded him to do something, desperately looking at Seven
"No use Captain." Seven said panting "The voices… like the collective… but filled with emotions..." she looked at me again at the same time the Doctor approached with a hypospray ready "NO!" Seven stood up and darted away from the Doctor dragging me with her.
"I've been trying to sedate her since she woke up" explained the Doctor "She has not let me"
"What is happening to her" I asked through gritted teeth
"Apparently she is dealing with the memories and the emotions that she experienced during the holodeck simulations Captain" said calmly the Doctor "I am not sure why or how. Also, she can't tell the difference between the simulations" He said now looking at Seven with concerned eyes
"What do you mean?" I asked too looking at Seven who was once again curled up on the floor.
"Just a moment ago she called you Katrine" he said, which made me look at him
"That's the name I used on the World War 2 simulation, right?" I asked now realizing she had not said Kathryn, as was my name
"Yes Captain. When she woke up, she was asking for Lady Katherine" I looked at him confused now "And by the time you contacted sickbay, she was acting Klingony like and was calling for her be'nal"
"Be'nal?" I asked "Isn't that Klingon for spouse?"
"Indeed" The Doctor nodded, then he looked accusatory at me "She was placed in the same simulations as you, always a few days before yourself." He said taking a few steps in my direction
"Get away from her you filthy roman!" Yelled Seven now putting herself between me and the Doctor
"I assure you I am not Roman and do not intend any harm to either of you" Said the Doctor
"Are you alright?" Asked me Seven briefly glancing at me but not losing sight of the Doctor
I nodded my head "I am. It is you I am worried at the moment. This man is a Doctor"
"I am not injured" stated flatly Seven, then she brought her hands to her head again, gasping in pain
"Trust us please" I told her leading her to a biobed
"You have my complete trust Captain" said Seven still in pain "I seem to be unable to control some urges though"
"The Doctor will sedate you and run some tests Seven" I said gesturing for the Doctor to get to the task at hand. Seven merely nodded before being sedated by him. "Figure out what's going on and how to help Seven Doctor"
"The common factor here is you Captain."
"Me?"
"Every time she was brought here before being sent to a different simulation, it was because she had been defeated, hunted. You always came a few days later, and were sent to the next one, where she was."
"And now she is recovering those memories" I said in hushed whisper
"I'll run some tests and scans on her borg implants and her synaptic processes. But at the moment Captain, my best guess is that you developed some sort of close relationship with each other during those simulations. That is why all her current personalities were asking for you"
"You mean to tell me that we were intimate?"
"Captain, no Klingon calls Be'nal, someone they have not been intimate with"
I could feel a massive headache drilling at my skull. "Work with B'Elanna" I told him "We need to know why Seven is regaining this memories and how to stop the pain she is experiencing."
"Aye Captain"
"I'll be in my ready room. Keep me updated and call me if you need anything" I turned to leave then glancing briefly at Seven before that
"Captain?" Called me the Doctor when I was at the door "I heard the Hirogen leader say that it was as if you had given up."
"What do you mean?" I asked confused looking back at him
"He said that you were a fierce prey, but once Seven was hunted, it didn't take long for you to go down" He paused, allowing me time to digest this "Seven might be new to emotions, but the characters you all impersonated were not" he said softly smiling at me
Janeway's (Katrine's) POV
We slept in each other's arms that night. Nothing else happened but the cuddling that none of us could or would stop. I had the best night sleep since Sainte Claire was occupied by the Nazis.
Anne left before dawn in order to get us that oscillator, by the time she came back I had to leave and get ready for our meeting today. I asked her to come with me but she refused stating that she had to run a few errands which made me wonder and fear if maybe Tuvok was right.
"All report rain. It's currently fifty nine degrees in Dover with low fog across the Channel. Temperatures are expected to range from forty five degrees to…" The radio transmission was not at it's peak, however, Brigitte was doing everything in her power to clear it.
"Damn, I'm missing it." She cursed
"Our most recent intelligence shows two German divisions here and here." Said Tuvok pointing a map that was set on the table.
"How recent is this intelligence?" I asked him
"Forty eight hours."
"Old news."
"Is Reginald Smith and you're listening to the British Radio Network. This report will repeat in…" the radio transmission stated
"Forty five seconds." Completed Briggitte before the transmission itself "Here's to English precision." She joked at the same time a knock on the door let us know someone was walking in
"We're closed." I stated
"Morning delivery." Our courier responded.
"You're late. What happened?" I asked letting him in
"Oh, just a tête-à-tête with a member of the Master Race."
"That's the second time this week. Sounds like they're increasing their patrols." I mused
"Perhaps it's time we chose another courier. Our baker is arousing suspicion." Suggested Tuvok
"There's no need to worry. I change my route every day, and I've become quite friendly with most of the Gestapo. They just love my strudel."
"A kind thank you to Jazzy McNulty and his Band. Now, the weather for today, September the twenty second, nineteen forty four. In London skies are grey, with a strong chance of afternoon rain. Temperatures will range from a low of fifty two degrees to a high of seventy one. The northern coast reports heavy rain, strong winds and ocean swells reaching four feet. Devon-shire, Hertford-shire and Solent-shire all report rain. It's currently fifty nine degrees in Dover with low fog across the Channel. Temperatures are expected to range from a low of forty five degrees to a high of sixty three. I am Reginald Smith and you are listening." Was heard on the radio at the same time Brigitte was taking notes
"Got it. Let's see the code key." She finally declared triumphantly
"Every fifth letter, every third vowel. Use the Sunday decryption sequence." I said while we decoded the message "A, H, C. Straight from Allied High Command."
"It must be important." Said our courier
"All messages regarding the war are important. It's only a matter of degree." Stated Tuvok matter of factly
"I suppose you're right but do you have to be so logical about everything?"
"In any covert battle, logic is a potent weapon. You might try it sometime."
"American Fourth Infantry to invade Sainte Claire Tuesday dawn." I declared as means to break them off.
"That's two days from now."
"Require assistance. Disable enemy communications. End message." I concluded
"The German radio transmitter is housed at their Headquarters." Said Tuvok
"That building is surrounded by guards. We can't just waltz in there and plant a bomb."
"Maybe I can help." Intervened Brigitte
"How?" I asked
"I'm upset. I need to see my special friend, even if it means bothering him at the office."
"A reconnaissance mission." Acknowledged Tuvok
"I'll try to locate the radio, see where the guards are posted, examine the locks, gather enough information to get us inside."
"It's too dangerous. If you're caught you'll be tortured for information." I stated. I was not up to the idea of putting anyone in unnecessary danger
"You don't know my friend. He would never do anything to harm his own child." she said gesturing her belly
"Encode a response to Allied Command. Confirm that we've received their message. Tell them we're proceeding according to plan." I finally said
Seven's (Anne LeNeuf's) POV
I was heading to Le Coeur de Lyon the next day in order to ask Katrine to join me for breakfast. I had went out of my way the day before after returning with the oscillator only to make sure that we had a perfect date. I could not ask her to dinner since we both had to be at Le Coeur de Lyon so breakfast would have to suffice. I knew we had agreed not to rush things between us, but the day before, when I woke up and she was still sleeping in my arms, I knew I wanted that to be a permanent arrangement so I was going to ask her to move in with me in order to have that accomplished.
However, my plans would have to be changed because I could see the SS guards shooting to our courier, I debated against myself, Katrine didn't want us to be so open but if I didn't do anything, surely he would die.
"This way." I said to him trying to make him walk along with me while I was shooting back.
"But the message." He said trying to recover the items on the floor
"No time!" I urged him dragging him through several alleys
I felt a sharp pain in my back, and while I was losing conscience I regretted that I hadn't been able to save our courier , that I was not going to be able to see her again, but above all, I regretted the fact that with my actions and failure, I had put her in danger by exposing myself. I could only the hope that the nazis didn't think her to be related to me, as much as that thought hurt, at least she would be safe.
Seven's POV
"Remain calm and stay quiet. There's a Hirogen working in the bio-lab, he might hear us. What's the last thing you remember?" Asked me the EMH of the Voyager while I was lying on a biobed on sickbay
"An attack. Hirogen vessels. They breached our hull and boarded the ship. I was in a phaser fight on deck three. I was struck several times. That's all I remember."
"Then you have no memory of the simulations in the holodeck?"
"None."
"The neural interface must be circumventing your memory centres."
"Neural interface?"
"It's a subdermal transmitter that links your neuro-cortex to the holodeck. In essence, it makes you believe you're a character within the program."
"Why am I in Sickbay?"
"You were wounded in a simulation. It's my job to patch you all up and send you back in. Half the crew is under lock and key. The rest are fighting for their lives on the Holodeck. This has been going on for almost 3 months. Dozens of battle scenarios, one more brutal than the last. You should see what a mess you and the Captain were after the Crusades."
"Is the Captain functioning adequately?
"Yes, the Captain is safe for now. She usually is sent to the same simulation you're at the moment. You both have been in this last simulation for 6 days"
"Will I be sent into the same simulation?"
"Yes, but this time with an advantage." He started with a note of pride "I have found a way to disable the interface by remodulating one of your Borg implants to emit a jamming signal. Once the Hirogen have brought you back to the holodeck, the jamming signal will activate within the first hour."
"My objective?"
"Find a control panel inside the Holodeck and engage the bridge access relays. That will enable Ensign Kim and me to deactivate all the neural interfaces. After Captain Janeway and the crew regain awareness you can work with them to mount a resistance against the Hirogen."
"What simulation will I be entering?"
"World War II. A twentieth century Earth conflict. Do you know anything about it?"
"Nothing." I admitted
"That could be a problem. Once the interface is disabled, you won't remember anything about your role in the simulation. Think of it as a new social setting. Do your best to fit in."
We noticed that a Hirogen was coming toward us, which prompted me to 'play' unconscious.
"This is the last neural interface. When you've finished with her, you'll help me replicate more." He told the EMH.
"I have to sedate you now." The Doctor told me while using a hyposray on me
"Are you saying that we all can remember what we experienced during the holodeck simulations?" asked Chakotay from his seat in the conference room
"Yes. Once the neural interfaces are all removed and their effects pass." stated the Doctor
"Weren't they disabled already?" Asked Tom
"Exactly. We only disabled them but they were not removed from the crew" Said Harry
"However if they are not removed, you will not remember," started the Doctor looking directly at me "but you will be assaulted by pain, like Seven was" he pointed out
"Seven was the first to remember because she healed faster" intervened B'Elanna
We all turned to look at Seven "Is it because of your nanoprobes"
"Indeed Captain" she curtly answered "My nanoprobes were trying to assimilate the neural interface"
"When assimilation failed, it was perceived as a threat to their host" completed B'Elanna
"And are you okay now?"
"I am functioning adequately, Captain"
"Start removing the devices Doctor. Harry and B'Elanna will help you out" I ordered looking around "Dismissed" I commanded after a few moments passed and no one added anything else. The headache was coming back full force so I pressed my fingers to my temple failing to notice that Seven had stayed behind
"Are you feeling alright Captain?" she asked taking me out of my musings "Do you require medical assistance?"
"Just a headache Seven" I replied smiling at her "Nothing to be worried about"
She frowned and I noticed that she was deep in thought, probably debating if she should contradict me on that.
"If your headaches increase, please consult with the Doctor" I looked amused at her
"Seven, I do believe it is the first time I hear you use that word"
"It is not" she said and then looked me in the eye "Make sure the neural interface on your head is removed as soon as possible Captain" she stated and left the conference room.
"Do you want me to remember?" I asked to the empty room "Do I want to?"
Janeway's (Katrine's)POV
Anne had me worried, we heard word in the street about the shooting and the demise of our courier and the fact that a few of our people had seen Anne trying to protect him by shooting to the Nazis did not help matters.
Both had been missing for several hours, since early in the morning after the shooting and I was starting to lose hope when she came in ready for her performance tonight.
"Are you okay?" I asked her while walking with her from the entrance to the stage
"I am" she looked at me and sent me a small smile "I am sorry if I worried you. I had to lose them in order to prevent them from capturing or recognizing me" I nodded and left her at the stage taking my seat again at the Kommandant's table.
"That old black magic has me in it's spell. That old black magic that you weave so well. Those icy fingers up and down my spine. The same old witchcraft when your eyes meet..." She had been singing for almost an hour when she suddenly stopped, which made me turn to face her. She was paler than usual "I must discontinue this activity. I am not well." She said
"If the entertainment is over, I'll be going." The Kommandant said
"Stay right there, Kommandant." I asked him, I was worried about Anne, but I needed to pry more information from him "I'm sure she's fine. Let me talk to her." I stated before following Anne to the bar "What's wrong?"
"I require a glass of water." She bluntly said, and seeing she was refusing to let me know what was really going on, I couldn't help the venom in my voice when I ordered her to make it a quick one
"I promised the Kommandant you'd be singing till midnight. I want to get a lot of information out of him tonight."
"I am ill." She tried to debate with me
"Look, I don't care if you're dying." I said almost regretting my words the moment I said them "Get back out there." I told her when I realized she had not shown emotion at all after what I said
"I won't." she stubbornly said before turning around and walking away
"Maybe you're right about her." I told Tuvok with sadness filling my heart
"The evidence is increasing. She was present today when our courier was shot down in the street yet somehow, she was unharmed. And now, on the eve of our liberation, she becomes uncooperative."
"Leave this to me."
I caught up with Anne and lead her to my office. She was looking curiously at me, as if trying to solve a puzzle. I locked the door and closed the blinds in order to get some privacy. We stared at each other for a long time, neither faltering on our decision until a knock was heard on my door.
I sighed and headed to open it, only to be greeted by Tuvok who informed me that the Kommandant had left for the night, then he turned away and left me with Anne again.
"See what you've done?" I asked angered at her.
"I fail to understand why you are upset at the moment. I informed you that I am not feeling well, that is the reason I had to discontinue that activity" she coldly said
"You look fine" I told her "Not unwell at all. You should have kept singing. The Kommandant likes your performance and I needed you there to obtain more information regarding the German office for our assault tonight"
"If we do not possess complete information, it seems illogical to assault their headquarters"
"Are you trying to sabotage us?" I asked through gritted teeth.
"I only wish to aid you and the crew"
"Crew?" I asked taken aback
"The people under your command" she simply stated
I sighed and sat beside her, taking her hands in mine. "We've talked about this Anne" I reminded her placing a kiss on her knuckles "Did they injure you this morning?"
"I am unharmed" she stated coldly but still looking curiously at me.
"I was so scared that they had killed you. We still don't know what happened to the courier"
"He was sent to another setting"
"How do you know? Where to?"
"I don't know. I heard someone talking about this" She said.
"I have to head down again. Stay here until you are feeling better" I told her standing up and placing a kiss on her temple "No more mistakes Anne." I told her sternly "Our lives and future depend on that"
After my discussion with Anne and the end of the night at our base, we had a short meeting before heading out to the German base using the information that Brigitte was able to provide us
"You'll maintain position here, twenty meters from the front doors. Arm yourself with a submachine gun and watch for any sign of trouble." I told Tuvok pointing out where in the map
"Understood."
"Now, we've observed a twenty second break in the guard rotation at four fifteen a.m. That should give you and me enough time to enter the building through the storm window on the eastern wall." I told Anne
"When I was there yesterday I saw guards posted at all three stairways. You'll have to reach the second floor through the elevator shaft. The command post is in the main gallery at the end of the hall." Informed us Brigitte
I nodded "Once inside, we plant the charges, blow the transmitter." Then I focused on Brigitte "You'll remain here. If something goes wrong and we're caught, destroy all evidence of the Underground. Our contact list, decryption codes, everything."
"Right." She agreed
"We leave in one hour." And we all set to work. I noticed Anne was distracted and that she had not connected the detonators "This won't make much of a bang. You forgot to connect the detonator." I told her playfully
"I will correct the error." She simply said
"It's lucky I found your little error." I told her now worried "It might have undermined our mission. Are you having second thoughts about tonight?" I asked concerned
"No."
"Good, because I don't want any more mistakes." I told her again, determined not to lose her for a mistake
"There won't be any."
"Let's hope not."
Seven's POV
It was an enlightening though short conversation I had with the Captain at her character's office. After she left, I walked to the door too and kept a close eye on her and Tuvok, listening to their conversations until Lt. Torres arrived and we prepared for the assault.
I was hesitant to bomb the place since the safety protocols of the holodeck were disabled, which meant we were all at risk and if we got caught in the explosion we would certainly find our demise. The thought of the Captain dying in an explosion not even knowing who she really was, certainly was not appealing so I tried to stop the charges from detonate, however Katrine noticed this and I had to correct the 'error' I made while preparing.
We walked into the German Commander's office. I instantly knew that the holodeck control panel had to be close so I started looking around.
"Set the charges here, there and there." Beckoned me 'Katrine' while looking around the office "This looks like a message from one of their reconnaissance teams. These must be instructions for troop deployments." She kept talking on about this facts that were proving to be somewhat useful for me in order to adapt to this World War II program. While she talked I found the holodeck control panel in order to complete my mission to aid the Captain. "The Germans must be taking up new positions outside the city. It looks like they're mobilizing more troops than our sources originally expected. They're moving armored units into the valley. They must know the Americans are coming. We've got to warn them somehow. What are you doing? You haven't set the charges. What is that?" She asked me when she took a moment to look back at me.
"I believe it is a transmitter." I decided to answer her last question "I'm attempting to disable it." I tried to reassure Katrine
"You're sending a message to the Nazis." She said matter of factly, pointing her gun at me now
"No."
"Step away, or I'll kill you." She demanded
I refused to comply with that order. Given what I learnt from the nature of the relationship between Katrine and Anne, the character I was originally impersonating in this setting, logic dictated she would not shoot me, which lead me to keep with the task at hand in order to engage the bridge access relays.
"I told you no more mistakes." She said in a defeated tone. I turned to face her, expecting that Ensign Kim's efforts would be successful any moment now. "You've just made your last one… I love you" She finally said about to pull the trigger. There and then, looking at her crest fallen face, I experienced a new emotion, it was somewhat similar to what I originally felt after I was severed from the collective, but it was different at the same time. Apparently the thought of being severed from Voyger's crew and mainly from Captain Janeway, was far more distressing than I originally imagined. However I did not had time to muse and understand this new feeling because I noticed the Captain let a small shriek caused apparently by a sharp stab of pain "Ah! Seven?" She acknowledged my presence as soon as the pain passed.
"Captain"
I was fairly certain that there was not a new kind of Borg weapon, a new way from the Borg Queen to keep the drones in check, all drones with emotions; all that seemed illogical, and ineffective, which was what kept me sane during the experience. I could not understand completely the voices, but all of them showed me different moments that they all spent with Captain Janeway. At first I thought the voices were urging me to comply with those images, but the Doctor said that they were only memories from the characters I had been forced to impersonate.
By the time the Doctor and Lt. Torres had managed to treat my condition, I had come to realize that even when the voices no longer tormented me and they were different people from who I was, all of them shared something with me. And that something was our feelings for Captain Janeway. It appeared that in each simulation somehow we ended up together and embarked on a romantic relationship.
It had been 2 weeks after the Hirogen Hunters left Voyager and Captain Janeway had refused to accept being treated by the Doctor, even when her headaches were getting worse. A brief meal I shared with Commander Chakotay, and Lts. Torres and Paris let me speculate that the Captain was uncertain about undergoing treatment.
"She believes that even when we couldn't remember each other as ourselves, we ended up grouping and interacting with each other as we normally do on Voyager" stated Commander Chakotay
"Explain" I demanded not understanding the logic on that statement
"Let's take the WW2 simulation for example" he started for which I nodded "Tuvok ended up being her advisor and 'security/tactical' expert, as well as a close friend… I started as an ally but a leader to a different cell, we joined forces together, like the Maquis and Starfleet" I nodded waiting for him to continue with this "Tom and B'Elanna, even when it was awkward, ended up together too, and they knew each other from before the resistance took over France"
"Once again like the Maquis and Starfleet" said Lt. Paris agreeing with him
"Now that you mention it" started Lt. Torres slightly blushing "in each simulation, Tom and I somehow ended up as a couple."
"You are right!" exclaimed Lt. Paris
"So, based on these facts. Captain Janeway believes that every interaction within the crew ended up being the same as it is on Voyager?" I asked not agreeing with that, especially since the Captain and myself had never engaged in romantic endeavors on board Voyager
"Or at least quite close to what they currently are, Seven" said Commander Chakotay
I nodded and left the mess hall and headed to Holodeck 1, where I started the Captain's Da'Vinci simulation. I had acquired a sense of satisfaction when I spoke with him, and I was rewarded with joy when we spoke about Katarina, the master's apprentice.
Janeway's POV
"What's going on Seven?"
"Hirogen Hunters took control of the ship. The Doctor stated that half the crew is under lock and key. The rest of us are fighting for our lives on the Holodeck simulations. This has been going on for 3 months."
"Simulations?" I asked for which she only nodded
"Once we are hunted on a setting, we are sent to the next. We are currently in a World War 2 Simmulation Captain"
"And where are we exactly?"
"Nazi's Headquarters at Sainte Claire, France"
"How many of the crew are here?"
"Here, just you and me. Tuvok is standing guard a few meters away from the complex. Since I recovered conscience of myself, I've seen Tuvok, Lt. Torres, and yourself"
"How is it that I don't remember any of this?"
"The Doctor stated that the Hirogen are using neural interfaces on the crew, all controlled through sickbay. Ensign Kim and the Doctor found a way to disable them, but they do need assistance"
"Neural interfaces?"
"It's a subdermal transmitter that links our neuro-cortex to the holodeck, making us believe we're a character within the program."
"I believe Seven, it is time we take the Voyager back to our control" I told her looking at the lectures on the computer at the same time that shooting started outside
"Hirogen hunters." Stated Seven
"Internal scans show thirteen of them on this holodeck."
"The Americans have arrived." She said looking out the window where we could hear a shooting just outside
"I can't access the ship's systems" I told her, I was about to continue my efforts when I remembered something that might be crucial to our survivor "Didn't you say this was Nazi headquarters?"
"I did."
"Then it would stand to reason this building is being targeted. Let's get out of here."
We left the deck as soon as the explosion of the holodeck building happened. We headed directly to Astrometrics.
"There are eighty five Hirogen on board concentrated on decks two through nine." Stated Seven looking at the readings on the computer systems
"What about the bridge?"
"Four Hirogen and Ensign Kim."
"At least he's alive. The neural interfaces, you said they're controlled through Sickbay."
"Yes. There's only one Hirogen in Sickbay with the Doctor, but the corridors outside are heavily guarded."
"That's our first objective, disable the interfaces. But we'll need help."
"We did have allies in the World War II simulation." She reminded me "The French Resistance."
"It's time we mount a resistance of our own." I finally stated
"Then I suggest we take the Jeffries tube 16 in order to get to the Resistance base"
"Hold your fire." I ordered the people around once I was getting out of the Jeffries tube
"Katrine, you survived." Tuvok said with a hint of surprise on his voice
"Are you surprised?" I asked amused
"Very. Nazi headquarters was destroyed. We assumed you were killed in the explosion."
"What is that? Some kind of escape tunnel?" B'Elanna asked gesturing to where we had came from
"That's precisely what it is." Seven stated
"You're the leader of the local Resistance." Chakotay probed. Not quite asking, but not affirming that either.
"That's right."
"Captain Miller, Fifth Armored Infantry." He introduced himself then he gestured to Tom Paris "This is Lieutenant Davis. I take it you've seen the German bunker we uncovered."
"I just came from there."
"We suspect it's a munitions lab. Can you confirm that?"
"Yes. A munitions lab." I agreed with him.
"Then this is it. We're calling in an air strike. Contact the RAF."
"Hold on, Captain." It is kind of weird to call him that. Then again, I did not have time for musing about this "There's an easier way to do this with the minimum of casualties."
"Let's hear it."
"I've located the generator that powers the entire complex. It's heavily guarded but with your help I can get close enough to set off some explosives."
"My orders are to blow the entire compound before the Germans send in reinforcements." He stubbornly said
"I saw technology in there you can't begin to imagine." I tried talking him out of that. "Warheads powerful enough to destroy this entire valley if they're accidentally detonated. Call for an air strike, it may be the last call you make."
"How can you get close enough?"
"This tunnel. I've been watching this compound for several months, and I've got a man inside."
"The place is crawling with Krauts." Stated Mr. Paris
"And that's why I need your help. If your men can clear these two corridors it'll give us access to this entryway. Get me there, and I can take care of the rest." I assured him
"C Company. What's their status?" Chakotay asked Paris
"They're holding position about two hundred yards from here."
"Get them on the horn." Once Paris turned to leave, Chakotay addressed me again "You'll lead us into the compound but I'm coming with you."
"I work better alone." I tried to keep him here
"This isn't a request, it's an order." He hotly said
"Order?" I am the Captain of the ship. However I had to remind myself that at this moment he is not Commander Chakotay, my second in command, but Captain Miller. So I tried a different tactic "Do I look like I'm wearing one of your uniforms? I go alone."
"I thought you needed our help. I'll be right behind you." He stated and left to get ready
"Even if I manage to disrupt the neural interfaces, we've still got a war to fight. We're going to need something a lot more effective than these old firearms." I told Seven
"I believe I can enhance these weapons using Borg technology, but I'll have to access Cargo Bay two."
"If something goes wrong and I don't succeed, you'll be the only one left who knows what's really going on." I told her softly
"Understood." She said before leaving
"Have our suspicions been confirmed?" Asked me Tuvok
"Suspicions?" It was a bad situation that we were not able to remind our roles on the program
"Is she a collaborator?" Tuvok asked me referring to Seven
"I think we can trust her." I told him
"Are you certain? Three hours ago you were prepared to put a bullet in her head."
"She's on our side." I firmly said
"In your absence I may be forced to make that determination for myself."
"I've already made it." I told him sternly "You're not to harm her. Is that understood?" He nodded slightly.
"German forces are advancing on our position." Someone said
"Let's give them a warm welcome." Stated Chakotay "Mademoiselle, after you." Gesturing to the 'tunnel'
"Captain. You should not take these headaches lightly, they seem to be getting worse" told me Chakotay when he noticed that I was gripping my head in my hands. It had been 3 weeks since the Hirogen left, and repairs were almost done on the ship.
"They're not as bad as when those aliens were experimenting on us" I said dismissively
"The Doctor said that Seven and you were the ones who experienced the more holodeck simulations" he said taking a seat beside me. We were on my ready room going through the crews and status reports.
"So?"
"You have more things to remember" he simply said "You should have been to sickbay already and have that thing removed"
"Not until everyone else in the crew is properly treated" I stated stubbornly
"I know you worry for the crew, I do too Kathryn. But if you are down, then the entire ship and the crew is down"
"I just want to make sure everyone else is safe and healthy first"
"Oh, so now we are Guiney pigs?" He asked amused "You want to see if there are no side effects first?"
I couldn't help but chuckle at that before shaking my head no "How is everyone dealing with the memories so far?"
"Well, I spoke with Tom and B'Elanna and they confirmed your suspicions"
"I was afraid you'd say that" I sighed
"Why?"
"Seven" I whispered and then focused on the task at hand.
Seven's POV
I returned to Holodeck 1 from Cargo Bay 2 with the required supplies to enhance our current weapons.
"Where have you been?" Asked Tuvok in what I surmise to be an accusatory tone
"Obtaining supplies." I said putting said supplies on the bar
"What is this?" he asked me
"German technology taken from their compound. I can use them to enhance our weapons." Which was exactly what I told the Captain I would do
I started working on the weapons. It would be a long process since the technology presented on the simulation was way behind in terms of technological progress.
I noticed Tuvok looking intently at my and keeping watch at the same time, which made sense considering he apparently did not trust me. On a booth in a far end of Le Coeur de Lyon, Lt. Paris and Lt. Torres sat speaking with one another.
I was only awaiting for the Captain's efforts to succeed for Ensign Kim to be able to free the rest of the crew from this programs. It was inefficient working this way.
Janeway's POV
After our visit to Holodeck 2 with the Klingons and talking to the Doctor, Chakotay and I set the charges just below the sickbay, then we headed up in order to face the Hirogen there.
"You!" He yelled upon seeing us
"Get him out of here." I ordered Chakotay
"There're ten pounds of dynamite under the floor set to blow in less than three minutes. Move" Chakotay commanded
After a brief attack we were able to leave just before sickbay blew up, I could only hope that it was enough to free my crew from those neural implants.
I lost track of Chakotay and was soon apprehended by a Hirogen who was told to take me to his leader.
Seven's POV
I realized that Tuvok, Torres and Paris seemed to be out of sorts in the middle of an attack, which lead me to the conclusion that the Captain had succeeded.
"We are on the holodeck under attack." I started "You must..." I was unable to prevent them on what was exactly going on since the German holograms and the Hirogen hunters took control of the building by force and stopped our efforts there.
"Bridge, this in Holodeck one." The lead Hirogen there said after a scrutinization of the establishment. "I have seized the building, and I have found another access to this holodeck." He said standing by the Jeffries tube
"Seal it. How many captives?" his leader asked
"Four. Their neural interfaces have been disabled. I will make the kill."
"No." He was ordered "They are not prey, they are hostages. I'll need them."
"As you wish." The Hirogen reluctantly conceded "You, help me seal this hatch."
"What do you think, a boy or a girl?" Lt. Paris asked Lt. Torres after a while
"It's a holographic projection." I told him, not understanding why he was bothering with small talk at all
"Unfortunately, it's a very good projection. I feel twenty kilos heavier. It even kicks." Said Lt. Torres
"I don't recognize this program." Said Tuvok
"I do." Intervened Lt. Paris "He's wearing a Nazi uniform." He said gesturing for a German soldier "We're on Earth during the Second World War."
"Nazi?" asked Lt. Torres
"Totalitarian fanatics bent on world conquest. The Borg of their day. No offence." He added looking at me
"None taken."
"What are you staring at?" Lt. Torres snapped at the German soldier in front of us
"Get up." Ordered the German Captain "You deceived me."
"Really?" she asked clearly not understanding, like the rest of us, what he was referring to.
"I should've seen through your flirtations."
"If you say so" She told him
"The thought of you carrying my child disgusts me!"
"You're not the only one." Snarled Lt. Torres
"Look, I don't know what went on between the two of you, but it's obviously over now." Tried to intervene Lt. Paris
"I see you're acquainted. Do you find her as attractive as I once did? I'll miss our nights together."
"Pig!" yelled Lt. Paris while delivering a strike to the German's face, which caused him to draw out his weapon
"Put the weapon away." Ordered the Hirogen "Now!"
Once he did and both Lt. Torres and Lt. Paris joined us sitting at the floor again. Lt. Paris decided to make what I believe he thought was a joke. "Funny, he doesn't seem like your type."
Janeway's POV
I was escorted to my ready room where I was expected by the Hirogen Leader
"I see you've done some redecorating." I told him gesturing around
"Your attempt to retake this vessel was inventive. From the day I seized Voyager you put up a dauntless fight, but your fight is over now. You're going to help me shut down these simulations and repair the holodecks."
"No. We'll destroy this ship before we surrender it."
"Don't threaten me, Captain. I've faced far more intimidating prey than you. If this fight continues, I promise you I will hunt down and kill every member of your crew."
"Well, by then this ship will be damaged beyond repair and there won't be much of a trophy left, will there?"
"Perhaps I should kill you and find someone who will co-operate."
"Good luck. You'll get the same response from all of them."
"You don't realize what's at stake."
"I know what's at stake. Your sick little game."
"This is not a game!" he yelled losing his cool
"Then what is it?"
"I'm trying to create a future for my people."
"Future?"
"I don't expect you to understand. You are prey."
"You underestimate us." I reminded him
"Yes, perhaps I do."
"I'm listening"
"My people are hunting themselves into extinction. Your holodeck technology might offer us an alternative, a new way of life. Instead of scattering ourselves across the quadrant in pursuit of prey, we could simulate the hunt and give ourselves a chance to rebuild our civilization."
"And confine your killing to holograms."
"With the safety protocols offline, the pursuit is just as challenging."
"Oh, I understand what you're trying to do, but then why have you been torturing us? Why have you thrown my crew into one brutal simulation after another?"
"I've been studying your behavior as I do with all my prey, but your holodecks allowed me to go further, to explore your culture, your history. I must admit, I've learned a great deal."
"How so?" I asked him now intrigued about this development
"Your people have faced extinction many times, but you've always managed to avoid it. You seem to recognize the need for change."
"Yes. You've got one of those moments running right now on the holodeck. We called it World War II."
"One of your most difficult eras. And yet you survived."
"It wasn't easy." I told him
"You are a resilient species. I admire your cunning."
"Let's end this. I'll call a cease-fire and we can try to contain the damage. I want my ship back, but in return I will give you what you need to create the holodeck technology. It would be cunning for you to agree."
"Glad to you see you finally decided to visit me Captain" said the Doctor motioning me toward a biobed
"Let's just get on with this" I told her "My head is killing me"
"That could have been prevented if you'd come earlier as I requested" he said running the tricoder over me.
"Don't have time for you to lecture me, Doctor"
"Commander Chakotay said you were worried for the crew's safety first, which I understand and approve but why did you really stall for so long?" He asked me while helping me to lay down
"Because of what you said" I admitted after a moment. At my words he just looked curiously at me so I had to elaborate "About our characters feelings during the simulations"
"I'm going to sedate you now Captain. When you wake up, your memories will come back to you within the first two hours."
Seven's POV
We had been kept there for 1 hour 37 minutes 13 seconds so far and we had not received signs from Captain, the Doctor, Chakotay or any other member of the crew. The Hirogen and the German holograms were becoming restless too at the lack of orders
"Sing." The Hirogen SS Captain ordered me after a hushed discussion with the German Captain.
"I will not." I stated
"Sing or you will die." He threatened me
"Then I'll die."
"Seven, you are a valued member of this crew." Started Tuvok "The logical response would be to grant his request."
"Logic is irrelevant." I said apparently losing control of my emotions "One day the Borg will assimilate your species despite your arrogance. When that moment arrives, remember me."
"Bridge to Holodeck one." Was heard over the com system from the Hirogen leader
"Yes." Responded the Hirogen SS Captain
"I've come to an agreement with Captain Janeway. Call a cease-fire."
"What?" Asked the Hirogen with us
"Captain?" Inquired Tuvok
"It's true, Tuvok." I heard Captain Janeway's voice and I was oddly filled with relief knowing she was safe. "Our first order of business is to call off the troops. I want you to find Chakotayand have him convince his soldiers to pull out of the city."
"Aye Captain." Acknowledged Tuvok turning around signaling the rest of us to follow him.
After Commander Chakotay joined us we regrouped on Sainte Claire Streets' improvised trenches. He gave the order to cease fire through the radio. Now we would have to wait. Tuvok did not seem convinced that these cease of fire would last.
"Keep it moving! Keep it moving! Get the lead out of your pants!" Yelled Lt. Paris to the soldiers around us while the both of us were walking down a street
"Mid-twentieth century American slang." I acknowledged
"You got a problem with that, sister?"
"You're enjoying this simulation." I noticed "I find that peculiar, given the circumstances."
"Loosen up, baby doll, the war's almost over."
Just as his words were out, the German soldiers started firing at us, leaded by the hologram that was apparently holding grudges against Lt. Torres.
"So much for the cease-fire!" Lt. Torres stated the obvious
Janeway's POV
I was working with the Hirogen leader in order to do damage control on the ship.
"These sensors indicate you've placed holo-emitters on decks five through twelve? No wonder the system breached, you've turned Voyager into one big Holodeck!"
"Can you shut it down?"
"Yes, but I'm going to have to initiate an overload. We'll worry about making repairs later. Right now we've got to put an end to those simulations. Janeway to Ensign Kim."
"Yes, Captain." I heard Harry over the com system
"Harry, I'm going to need your help overloading the holo-emitter network… I'm transferring optical processor control to you now. Start charging the secondary power relays. We'll use them to trigger the overload." I stated
"I'm on it." Responded me Harry
"It's going to take some time." I said looking toward the Hirogen leader "There are over eight hundred emitters that we have to…" I could not complete that sentence because the Hirogen dressed as an SS office that was previously on the WWII program, stepped in, guns pointed at us
"Move away from the controls!" he demanded
"Why haven't you ordered the cease-fire?" asked his leader
"Move away from the controls." The SS Hirogen repeated
"Listen to me!" started the Hirogen leader
"No!" yelled the SS Hirogen taking the life of his previous leader.
"What are you waiting for?" I asked expecting him to shoot me
"I am a hunter. You are my prey. Run." And run I did
Seven's POV
"Acknowledged. Our holographic allies are losing ground. The German troops are surrounding the city." Stated Commander Chakotay after being updated through the radio
"I don't know how much longer we can hold them off. These weapons are pretty crude. They're not much help." Said Lt. Paris, apparently forgetting I was working on enhancing our weaponry
"Maybe we should fall back?" suggested Lt. Torres
"Where to?" asked Commander Chakotay clearly worried "They're coming in from all sides. Tuvok, any chance we can get through that breach in the hologrid."
"Unlikely. Twenty more Hirogen have taken up position near the opening. We are outnumbered."
"How's it going?" asked me Commander Chakotay after he digested the information Tuvok provided him
"I'm modifying this explosive device to emit a photonic burst." I reminded him "It will be harmless to organic tissue but it should disrupt all holographic activity within twenty metres."
"We'll try to buy you some time."
The battle and the shooting continued around us, and we were close to lose this battle, however I was also close to completing my task
"They're closing in." yelled Comander Chakotay to be heard above all the chaos around.
I completed the grenade and stood up in order to throw it to the German holograms, which would effectively erase all holographic projections within 20 meters as I previously informed Commander Chakotay. However, I was unable to toss the grenade to them due to a hit I received from the cross fire.
Janeway's POV
While running along the corridors trying to get away from the Hirogen adamant on hunting me, I stumbled across a photonic force field which affected only holograms, II was only able to notice this because a fallen hologram soldier was missing his legs. I took him away from the field and decided to use this to my advantage.
"Please don't do this." I told the Hirogen while I was using fallen debris from the ship as a small trench "I can be of use to you. I can help you repair the ship. Don't kill me!"
The Hirogen was apparently too arrogant to try otherwise, so he stepped in and noticed that his holographic rifle disappeared from his hands, reappearing within close range to me. I took the chance and pointed it to him. Now our rolls were reversed, he was being hunted.
"This hunt is over." I told him noticing he had nowhere left to run. We were a few decks above the holodeck, however due to recent explosions we were able to see clearly what was going on down there. The Klingon holograms had joined in the battle against the Nazis and now they were outnumbered. "Tell your hunters to stand down. I'll use this if you force me to."
The Hirogen refused to listen, and he unfortunately ended up falling down through the decks.
I was at Leonardo's studio after a long chat with him. The Master had already retired for the night and I was sitting there just looking at the stairs, wondering how all this would end.
The last few weeks I had come to terms with my so called humanity and the emotions that came along with it. I had tried to suppress them in favor of efficiency on my work, and I had started some meditation techniques that Tuvok had taught me.
He had stated that he noticed some changes in my behavior since the Hirogen left Voyager, which was truth, I had changed since the moment I recovered the memories of what happened during the time they forced us on those simulations.
I had come to accept my feelings for Captain Janeway, and it pained me to know that apparently those were not returned by her. She had refused for so long to go to Sickbay and I hurt knowing that it was because she did not want to remember our time together.
"I was wondering who was running my program" I heard the Captain said "Master DaVinci does not like visitors after midnight" she said smiling softly at me
"We spent the evening keeping each other company" I told her "He retired for the night 2 hours 26 minutes 12 seconds ago"
"What are you doing here, Seven?"
"This simulation contains you. I have been studying the components in order to understand"
"Understand?"
"You made this program, which means by understanding the layers and components of the program, I might be close to understand you. Captain"
"One can never understand another being Seven. And by studying the program, you are only interpreting, not understanding me" She said taking a seat facing me "To understand a human being it is best to speak with them"
"That possibility was not an option Captain"
"Why Seven?"
"You refused to be treated by the Doctor. You refused to speak about this with me, or anyone else on board Voyager. You seemed to be avoiding me"
"You are right" she sighed looking down
"It is puzzling" I told her after a moment
"What's that?"
"You made me into an individual. You encouraged me to stop thinking like a member of the Collective, to cultivate my independence and my humanity. But I had to become someone else, and experience something similar to the hive mind of the Collective, in order to ascertain my independence and humanity" I told her looking her directly in the eye
"What do you mean?" she asked puzzled
"I do not believe that I would have become human, if I was not programmed by the Hirogen to represent one, or ones in this case, in the holodeck" I started as a mean of explanation "And only after I remembered the individuals I impersonated, and their experiences, I was able to understand my own humanity"
"Have you really Seven?" She asked with a hint of sadness in her voice
"Have I what, Captain?"
"Understood your humanity?" I arched an eyebrow expecting her to elaborate "I have been human, and acted human, all my life Seven, and I still can't understand it?"
"If that is true, then why push me into doing so?"
"Being human is an ongoing process Seven. We can have moments of amazing revelations, we can come to understand some phenomena in the universe, we can learn more than we ever thought possible… but we will never truly understand humanity"
"Because life is based on emotions, feelings" I told her, for which she nodded "I realize we cannot understand emotions, since they are irrational, and there is no way to rationalize them… but Captain" I told her placing my right hand over her hands which rested on her lap "I know, thanks to you, that we can come to terms and deal with them"
I felt the Captain shaking under my touch, and after a few seconds, sobs were escaping her lips and tears were running down her cheeks.
"I can't Seven" she said between sobs
"Why?"
"I am Captain of a starship. There are protocols and regulations regarding this kind of matter"
"Irrelevant" I told her firmly, using my other hand to lift her chin and force her to look up at me "We are 60,000 light years from the Alpha Quadrant Captain, you can't abide by their protocols all the time, it is illogical to deny yourself companionship for 70 years"
A small chuckle left her lips, but the sobs and tears continued "You just don't get it, do you?" she asked me. I pondered for a moment before responding to that.
"You are scared" I told her "You wish this vessel to return to the Alpha Quadrant" I continued looking her in the eye "We are not at war, but we find ourselves in hostile territory, and your philosophy of exploration exposes Voyager to constant risk"
"You know we explore not because we have to Seven, but because we want to" she said softly, I noticed that her sobs had stopped and her breathing had evened, but tears still rolled down her face. I reached to wipe them.
"Your curiosity about the universe is understandable. Your fear however is irrational" She looked puzzled at me "I know you are our Captain, and as such you are responsible for bringing the crew back home and keeping them safe all through the journey" she nodded "I am part of the crew, and either you admit it or not, you care deeply for me, just as I care for you." She nodded again "The logical course of action under this situation would be to explore these feelings for one another Captain, and change the paradigm of our relationship. Either way you are going to be worried for my safety and I for yours, it would be better to spend our time off together not worrying about what the other one is doing or how we are holding up"
"What if it does not work out Seven? I don't want to lose you" She said after a few minutes of pondering what I told her.
"You are not going to lose me Captain, even if we are not romantically involved." I told her stroking her cheek. "And It had been working for the last 4 months" I paused looking at her
"The holodeck simulations lasted only 3, Seven" she said defeated
"Precisely" I said smiling at her "This last month has been us, not characters. They helped us uncover our feelings, but they are not us" I whispered leaning into her
"I guess we should make our own memories then, instead of depending on them" she said smiling a bit
"I will comply" I agreed grinning at her before placing a soft kiss on her mouth. "...and I have waited so long. It must be right, it can't be wrong." I softly sang for her the last verse of this song
"I love you Seven" She whispered while hugging me, burying her face in the crook of my neck
"As I you, Captain"
A/N: I learned that it is indeed quite hard to write Seven of Nine, so I hope she was not too far from cannon, though if you feel she was, keep in mind that this is a fanfic so it is allowed, right?
I left the court open for the other holodeck settings to be used on another fic. I might work on them sometime, but most likely it won't come to that, so if any of you is interested in picking that up, please let me know in order for me to read them, because I am curious to know what they lived during the Crusades, as Klingons and what exactly was their encounter with Romans like.
Remember to leave your reviews… they nourish my imagination.
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