I knew it. I called it. No one believed me when I said it. He doesn't have feelings for me, and I imagine he barely even wants me to be his friend. Neither Chica nor Madelyn believed me when I told them that. Yet, they continued to press me until I told him my feelings. But I suppose an explanation is in order for whoever decides to read this thing.

My name is Bonnie, and I work and live at an establishment called Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. Previously, the attractions were animatronics, but they were deemed too unsafe and my friends and I were brought in to replace them. As well, it was too expensive to pay the mechanics to keep them running, so here we are now being compensated in basic necessities and not money. Not that I mind particularly.

There's Freddy, a young man of 18, and the oldest among us. His lengthy, brown hair has my attention caught to the ringleader of the mix-and-match friend group we have. His blue eyes are the kindest thing you'll ever witness, despite the fact that they're attached to someone who can be so scary when he wants to be. My affections for him have been deep for simply the few months that we've been here.

Next, there's Chica, a girl of age seventeen, the second oldest. She's such an amazing cook, and honestly holds us all together well. She's fun to be around, her blonde hair and sweet voice being traits to look up to more than anything. Though her frustrations come out easily, she still retains some level of control over herself at all times.

Madelyn, a girl of my age, sixteen. She enjoys being around children and working with them more than anyone. Her white hair and beautiful green eyes are quite alluring, and I would like to think that we're best friends now. She's really the only one who puts up with all of my bullshit.

Then, at last, you come to me. The gay, blue-haired introvert of the group. If I had it my way, I'd keep myself locked in my room to play the guitar all day. Unfortunately, that isn't the case. I'm forced to bring myself out of my room and play for the kids when they come around. And despite all of the mental problems I've been facing, I've still been forced to spread a smile across my face and hide my problems.

One day, I overheard a conversation between Freddy and Chica, and I regretted listening in.

"Hey Chica, can you help me out with something?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure what's up?"

"I genuinely feel like I'm the only one who doesn't like Bonnie all that much."

"Well, that I can't help you out with, because I think you might be the only one. Because he and Madelyn are best friends, and I don't mind him all that much."

"I don't know what it is about him, but I always feel some sort of distaste towards him. I can't really explain it."

"Can't help you out there. He's a bit too harmless for me to really be able to dislike him at all."

At that point, I gave up listening to the conversation and retreated into my own thoughts.

Should I look like I just didn't hear that and tell him my feelings anyway? No, that would be stupid. You're stupid. Stop thinking he'd change his mind because of three words, that only happens in those dumb fairy tales. This is real life. You know that. Don't expect anything to come of it, don't say anything.

I, more conflicted than I'd ever been, began to wonder what to do with myself. I decided eventually to tell him anyway, hoping there was any sliver of a chance left that I could change his mind. And even as I write this, I wish that had been the case.

Either way, it was later that day that I started to go over my lines in my head, rehearsing what I'd tell him word-for-word. The tone I would use, the way my eyes would dart around while it happened, everything. Every minute detail I practised to myself in the mirror.

"So I know we haven't been friends for super long— no…" I mumbled to myself, editing the note I had on my phone a bit. I sighed and looked myself in the eyes through the mirror, asking myself what I was doing. "You're standing here in front of a mirror rehearsing a question you very well know the answer to. Where is your future? Can't be here. They were upfront with the policies, and you can't stay here forever."

I wanted to just stop myself, turn off my phone, scratch my face out of pictures, and disappear. I wanted out of the nightmare that I was living in. But I needed the shelter, I needed the food. I couldn't survive without this job. I either had to face Freddy and my feelings for him or die out along on the streets. The former was definitely going to be the more difficult option, but I still had some will to live left in me.

I read over the note again, my heart pounding as my feet carried me to the door. I knew that this was the only way, and Chica and Madelyn both told me that it would be a good idea, to be honest with him. I'm not surprised they didn't go off and tell him for me, knowing that it was a secret, but I am surprised they didn't try to nudge him my way. It just seemed like something they would do, play coy to help me along. They were great friends for it.

I sighed and paced around for a few more moments before finally stepping out of my room. I looked to each end of the hallway and caught Freddy headed my way. I stepped right as he walked by, holding my hand out to stop him. I caught his eyes and felt my face grow hot as I attempted to get out what I wanted to say.

"Hey Bon, what's up?" he greeted me, as though he didn't hate me. His voice was still so hypnotising, and I could feel the pressure physically building in my throat.

Just say it, you moron, my head told me.

"You okay, Bonnie? You look flustered."

"I— I'm fine, I just— I don't know how to say this…" I babbled, stalling for time. "Freddy, I— I love you. I have for a while now, and I know that you don't—"

"Bonnie, look at me."

I silenced myself and caught his eyes again.

He stepped forward and embraced me. "You weren't wrong for hoping that I would have some sort of feeling back, don't put yourself down for letting yourself tell me. But, I just don't feel the same way about you. I think more highly of you for being willing to share that with me, but I just don't think things would work out between us."

"I get that, but— it doesn't hurt any less. It still feels like you've torn my heart straight from my chest. I want to cry right now."

"It's okay to cry, it's okay to feel upset. It's normal, everyone has that feeling at some point in their life. You'll get through it, I promise you that."

"I don't think that you should be making empty promises, Freddy. I've been broken for a long time, I've had contemplation of ending my own life for a long time. So many thoughts and feelings that I don't know what to do with. I always think about how life could be better, about how bad things are going for me now. And I just wanted to maybe make things better."

"Thinking like that isn't good. If you need to talk, don't feel afraid to come to me if you need help."

I was quiet. I didn't want to tell him that I couldn't just stop thinking that way that I did. I couldn't tell him his words meant nothing, and that I was just lost and powerless. But there was something he was withholding, I could tell that much.

But now my thoughts of ending it all increase. Sure, I have one of the easiest jobs ever, but I feel bad knowing that. Knowing that no one is as fortunate to have the things that I have for virtually no work. I feel as if I'm not working hard enough. It may be in my best interest to just get up and talk to Madelyn or something. She's usually awake and always there to be a shoulder to lean on.

Bonnie set his pen down quietly on the table and stood, done with trying to vent his feelings to a piece of paper. It had been a number of days now since all of that had happened, and yet he was still stuck on it. But having it burned into his memory didn't help him feel like less of an idiot for what he'd done. It was almost autonomous, the way he guided himself to Madelyn's room just next to his.

He knocked silently on the door, hoping he wasn't disturbing her too badly. It was late at night and he imagined that she was asleep. She soon opened the door to meet eyes with Bonnie.

"Did I wake you?" he asked with a guilt-tinged voice.

"Yeah, but we're here now, and I know you need to talk. Come on in," she told him.

"I can go if you don't want to be bothered, it can wait 'till in the morning."

"Just come in."

Bonnie did as he was told, stepping in and sitting on the edge of the bed before she sat down next to him.

"Now, I know you told Freddy how you feel, and I'm proud of you for that. I'm glad you could bring yourself to do it. But I also know what he said," she told him.

"You know?"

"Yes. And I know it's hard to take that kind of blow, but I believe you can get through it. It's been a couple days, I'm sure you can cheer up."

"I'm running low on courage. What do I do? He said I'll get over it, but it's so hard to just let something like that roll off my back."

"It's hard to heal that kind of wound, Bonnie. I should know, I was in the same position for a while. But that was simply because they had feelings for somebody else. But I've still been a friend to them, helped them, and made sure I was there for them. They were there for me as well, but I could never tell them how I felt because they never shared the same affection. I respected that. They were chasing somebody else, and in the end, things worked out and I got over it. You can do it too. I believe in you."

"Look, Madelyn, if you had feelings for me you could've just told me. You don't have to be discreet, I get the message. Maybe once all of this is over, I can make it up to you, but not right now. But I promise you we'll find something to do when I'm feeling better."

Madelyn sighed. "I'm sorry to force that on you, don't feel like you need to do anything for me. It's my fault for bringing up the situation as an example in the first place. If you don't want to, you don't have to."

"I want to. I want to make it all up to you, and I don't want you to suffer because I'm blind to your feelings. I think I should've stopped chasing him a long time ago, I'm stupid for trying to even bother. I mean, I overheard him talking to Chica about how much he didn't like me."

"Don't beat yourself up over it all. It's normal to feel upset about this type of thing. You held him on such a high pedestal, and you loved him. And when he didn't share those feelings your world came crashing down. You wanted things to go down a lot more smoothly, but they didn't. You feel hurt by the fact that he didn't feel the same way. It's nothing to hate yourself over. It's normal."

"I guess. Thanks for the talk, Madelyn. And as soon as I'm in a stable emotional position, I'll take you out. I promise."

"It'll be okay. Just take it at your own pace, don't feel like you're obligated to rush into things. It takes time. Just don't do anything too stupid."

"I'll keep that in mind. I'll try to sleep, and try not to bother you."

"Don't be afraid to come and get me. I am here in case you need someone."

Bonnie lifted himself from the bed quietly and headed towards the door. He opened it and looked back at Madelyn before stepping out She smiled at him, a still darkened expression displayed on his face. He couldn't muster the strength to smile. He looked down at the floor before turning back and heading back to his room. The quiet creak of the door closing made him feel as though he were a disturbance to everyone.

Madelyn began to wonder what exactly was going on in his head. She said that she knew how he felt, but the fact that he cared about her in the first place was an insane thought to her. She was close with Freddy, and it was obvious Freddy only cared because he had to. It was a bit heartless in her mind, but Freddy had his reasons.

She heard the quiet strum of his guitar in the room over. That was something she personally loved about Bonnie, though it was something Freddy despised. He'd stay up late into the night working on music with a passion like no other. The sound would be difficult to fall asleep to unless you got lucky and caught him working on something calm. But most of the time he was trying something fast or heavy, though Madelyn still loved him for the passion he had for it.

Bonnie could tell his stress levels were rising as he was having a difficult time finding where to take the song next. He glanced to the clock, realising it was just past midnight. He put the guitar down on its stand, running his hands through his hair. His head wasn't right, he knew that much. If he couldn't properly write music something was definitely not right. He flopped on his bed curling up as he tried to fall asleep. He felt completely empty inside as if that single experience alone had killed every last cell of happiness in his body.

As his mind ran more, he began to long Madelyn. He wanted to go back and enjoy the night with her, become the guy she wanted him to be. He felt a bit guilty, not being with the girl who had spent so much of her time with him. It took him so long to realise that he loved her, and he hated himself for that. He'd probably pulled her away from some of her favourite things because he needed someone to talk to, and she never complained about it. He felt like an awful friend.

Go back to her, tell her you love her. Apologise for not realising it all sooner, his mind called to him. He sat up, pulling his knees to his chest. He didn't know if he wanted to bother her again just to admit it all to her, or if it were better to wait until the morning. The pizzeria would be closed for the day as it was Sunday, so he'd have a chance. He was just so uncertain if it was too early to go ahead and jump into all of it after just having his heart broken. He didn't want to lead her on, but he did feel a bit self-compelled to try the relationship out anyways.

He questioned himself, wondering what the best course of action was. Right now, he felt like he truly loved her, but he had no idea if that was the guilt and broken heart talking or if it was genuine. He felt like it was genuine, but he didn't want to jump into things only to immediately have to cut them off. He couldn't do that to her.

As he thought about the whole situation more and more, he began to think of new lyrics for a song. He grabbed his notebook and wrote down what had come to his mind, putting together a quick draft. He didn't know if he'd play it for her - as he'd often play songs for her when he wanted to show them off - just because of his deep and personal connection with the song. However, he prevailed in finishing the draft and fell asleep face-first on his desk. He awoke the next morning to a knock on his door.

"Shit!" he said loudly as the sharp sound reached his ears.

"Bonnie, can I come in?" he heard Madelyn's voice call.

"Uh, just one sec!" he called in reply. He got himself up, made his bed, and folded the notebook shut before getting up and opening the door, greeted by her smile. "Sorry, you just caught me off guard. Was still asleep."

"I can tell you just woke up by how you sound and the frizzled up hair of yours."

Bonnie pushed his hands to his head to mat-down his hair, blushing and smiling. "I fell asleep on the desk drafting a song."

"Oooh, do you think I could hear it when you're done?"

"I— I honestly don't know. I want to show you, but at the same time it's just so deep and personal that I don't know if I'll be willing to share it when it's done."

"I think you should even push beyond that because if it's something sensitive I can help you out, should the song not do enough for you. But if it's something you want to keep quiet, I can respect that. I just like hearing you play the things you make, and you always look so happy when you're playing them."

"I think I'll show it to you, but only after I feel that it's perfect. I want to do the job of conveying some deeper-rooted personal feelings. But I don't know when it will be ready."

"That's reasonable. But I was wondering if you wanted to do anything today since we have the day off?"

"I guess. I had that reservation for the restaurant that I still haven't cancelled if you wanted to go."

"I would love to, Bonnie."

"Sounds good."

Nightfall. Bonnie stood in front of the mirror in his room, unsure if he looked like he was trying too hard. He wanted so badly for this night to be perfect, so that way he could convey himself at the end of the night. He knew he couldn't make sure it went absolutely perfectly, though. Maybe he'd spill something or just screw up what he was saying. There was no way to tell. He didn't want to miss his chance.

He began pacing, looking at the clock. It was almost seven. He wasn't particularly prepared for what was to come, but he was prepared as he would ever be. He could feel himself getting nervous, waiting for the knock on the door.

You can't screw this up. You have to mind every little move you make, micromanage literally everything until the end of the night. Simple enough, right? he tried to reason with himself.

Another look at the clock. Exactly seven. Any moment now.

A knocking was heard at the door, and Bonnie was quick to answer. To no surprise, it was Madelyn, right on time. He smiled at her, glad to see her face once again.

"Are you ready?" she asked. "You look a bit nervous."

"I'm fine," Bonnie lied.

"I just want you to know that you don't need to be worried. You're my friend Bonnie, and nothing will change that."

"That's— That's good to know.:

Madelyn followed him out of the building, and they walked quietly in the moonlight to a nice restaurant nearby. Sure, Bonnie didn't exactly get paid, but the owners of the establishment paid for everyone's meals and shelter to make sure they could be more familiar with one another. It may not have been the most conventional - or legal - way of doing things, but he was fine with it.

Bonnie had made the reservation in plans to go with Freddy in the even he said yes. He had yet to cancel it, thankfully, so he was able to go with Madelyn instead. He would've punched himself had he gone and cancelled it immediately. He hoped that he didn't come off as the sort of guy who needed everything to be perfect all the time because of tonight, but he knew that it could be a side effect of how he presented himself.

They got there and sat down relatively quickly, and Bonnie sat nervously in his seat. His leg bounced with fervour under the table and his eyes darted around the room, scanning everything quickly.

"I'm glad you didn't end up cancelling this when things went poorly," Madelyn said. "Otherwise I don't think we would've been able to get in."

"Heh, I figured he'd turn me down, but I got the spot anyways," Bonnie said bashfully. "In the end, I guess it all worked out. Anyway, I invited you along because— well, I wanted to say something. I've been thinking, and—"

"Good evening, may I fetch you two something to drink?" the waiter interrupted.

Madelyn glanced up to see the tall, red-headed waiter who was nicely dressed. His hair was poofy and slightly curly and went down to his jawline. And his eyes were just as captivating as the rest of his face, and she couldn't tell why. "I— I'd just like a glass of water, thanks," she stammered.

"Same here, thanks."

"I will return momentarily," the waiter said, before stepping away and leaving the pair alone once more.

"So, as I was saying, I—"

"Wait, I just wanna gush really quickly, is that alright?"

"I— I suppose…?"

"Can you believe how attractive he was? I just— I've never seen someone who looks like that. He was so handsome. Okay, okay, sorry. What were you gonna say?"

"Well, it wasn't really that important."

"No, go ahead, tell me."

"No, it's alright. It doesn't matter as much as I thought it did. It seemed important at first, but I thought about it more and I don't wanna sort of— I dunno. I'm searching for words here, just to tell you it doesn't feel as important as much as I thought it was."

"Are you sure? You seemed as if it was really important. Sorry for interrupting you. If you wanna say it, go ahead."

"No, no, it's not that important."

The pair went quiet as the hint of defeat was obvious in Bonnie's voice. He wanted to curl up and cry, but he knew he couldn't show that. Tonight was supposed to be the night he told her how he felt, how he loved her. Yet now he'd lost all courage to do so. Hearing her talk about how attractive just the waited was, he knew that he couldn't just pour his heart out after that.

The night continued in awkward silence. Madelyn would try to get something out of Bonnie, but he'd locked his brain up and wasn't budging. He'd only talk in intervals, and it would barely be anything near what Madelyn wanted him to say.

"Bonnie, you've been quiet all night. What's wrong?" she asked at last.

"I dunno," Bonnie mumbled in reply. "Just been thinking, I guess…."

"What have you been thinking about?"

"I don't even know, just kinda letting my mind run free. I haven't exactly been keeping track of what crosses it, and I don't really know if any of it is coherent."

"Well do you wanna just talk about things as they cross your mind?"

"Not really. Not much to talk about."

Madelyn sighed. "You really don't seem okay, Bonnie. I want you to know that no matter what I will always listen to what you have to say. If you have to vent about something, or just randomly complain about nothing, I'll listen. I'll be there for you when no one else will because I care about you, Bonnie. I don't want you to withhold anything from me."

"I mean, I guess we could talk later about it later. It's just— I don't want to burden you with my thoughts. I feel like I put you through too much, and I figured tonight'd be the night that you told me what's bothering you."

"It bothers me that you never told me what you wanted to say, Bonnie. I feel like it was my rambling that made you rethink saying it, and now I want to know what it was."

"It wasn't you," Bonnie assured her. "I just realised that it wasn't important."

"Bullshit," she told him, "anything you have to say is important to me. All you have to do is say it, and I'll listen."

Bonnie sighed. "Look, I've just become uncomfortable talking about it, and I don't think it's a good idea anymore."

"Well, I guess I should stop pushing you. If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine."

The rest of the night continued in near silence, and the two knew that there weren't many more words that could pass between them. Bonnie knew he'd made it awkward for himself, just by trying to bring it up and then never following through.

They soon returned to the establishment, and with nothing but a quick hug, each returned silently to their rooms. Bonnie didn't want to talk anymore. He wanted Madelyn to be happy, and he knew that he couldn't be the one to make her happy anymore. He was fine with that, or so he assured himself.

He hung up his jacket before curling up in bed to go to sleep.

It's fine, everything's fine. She's moved on and that's okay. It's her life, her decision. It's her life if she finds happiness in someone else you can accept that. His mind continued to race, his thoughts completely taking over his common sense. He wanted to go tell her before it was too late for him, even though he knew he was already too late. He couldn't bring himself to force her to bear the decision.

He awoke late the next morning, around 7:45 A.M. It was fifteen minutes away from opening time. Through turmoiled thoughts, he decided it was best that he just didn't show his face to the kids today. He wouldn't be able to think straight and would end up bumming them out because he couldn't play properly. He knew everyone else would have a hard time keeping them under control as they were usually sat before him and quiet, mesmerised by his playing.

But if he couldn't play there was no way he could help control them anyways. He hid away in the closet, curled up at the bottom silently allowing tears to roll down his face. He began to let his thoughts overtake him, and soon all he heard was, You're the last choice, and No one would ever choose you first.

He felt completely outdone by anyone who simply passed by because it felt like everyone else had the confidence he lacked. No one else had to rely on close friends to keep them on their feet. He was extremely dependent on others, so it felt like no one wanted him because of that. Even his closest friend had proven his point, given what she'd said about just the waiter last night. He didn't want to imagine what would've happened if it had been someone of note.

That's what broke him and kept him from saying what he needed to say. He knew he should've spoken up anyways, but he felt as if he'd be burdening Madelyn by bringing it up. She grew attracted to other guys when she found out he wanted Freddy, and now he had no one.

Meanwhile, Madelyn was entertaining some of the kids Bonnie was trying to avoid. While she was doing so, some of them asked where the blue-haired boy had been.

"Well I dunno sweethearts, is he not where he usually it?" she asked them. They simply shook their heads in reply. Madelyn glanced up at the door to the employee hallway and assured them that she was going to find him.

She calmed down some of the other kids who were hanging around and then stepped into the hallway slowly. She looked down the line glancing at everyone's rooms quickly before her eyes settled on the second door to the left. Her hand went up to knock as she pressed her ear to the door. No response. She repeated the action to no effect.

She sighed. "Bonnie, I'm coming in," she warned before opening the door to find a room void of any life.

Her eyes glanced around the room trying to find his face but saw nothing of him.

"Bonnie," she called, "the kids wanna see you." There was no reply. "C'mon Bonnie, where are you?" she called again as the distress in her voice grew. "If you're upset, we can talk about it. You just have to be open with me."

He looked up from his spot in the closet, continuing to keep himself silent. He just wanted to be alone to brood, he didn't want to talk about it. He heard Madelyn continue to call out, but he didn't answer. It slowly became a jumble of noises to him.

"C'mon Bonnie, this isn't funny anymore!" she called out again, near tears. "I care about you, and I never wanted it to come to this. I don't want to have lost you…."

He could hear what she was saying now, and it was slowly breaking his heart. He couldn't stand keeping her calls waiting any longer. He couldn't bear to hear her vainly call his name and end up putting her into a state much like his own.

He stood from his curled up spot and slowly opened the closet door, stepping out into the light. "I'm here," he said with more than a hint of despair. I just didn't want to come out, I didn't want to talk, because if we talked I'd put so much of a burden on you by the end of it. I can't bring myself to do that."

"I-I'm just so glad you're here and that you're alive," she said, but her expression soon went sombre. "Wh-why don't you want to talk about it? I want to help you, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing with you, it's all on me. I don't trust myself to tell you everything, and I feel as though I'd be putting a responsibility on you that you don't deserve."

"Sit down. We're talking about this, like it or not."

Bonnie did as he was told and sat on the edge of the bed. Madelyn sat down beside him, putting her hand on his shoulder and looking at him.

"Tell me what's bothering you, Bonnie. Talking about it will get it out of your mind."

"I-I don't exactly know where to start. I— I guess it would be the best if I started from when I told Freddy about how I felt about him… that's when this feeling kinda started. It was small then, but as of last night, it's manifested itself. So I told Freddy how I felt and he put me down easy, but I knew deep down that he would probably take me if he didn't have other, much better options. He had his eyes set on someone else though, and I can respect that. However, when you said you loved me it helped me to understand that it was possible when I thought it wasn't. But last night, when you went on about how the waiter was cute, I— I sorta went back to feeling the way I had been before. The feeling that I would never be anyone's first or even second choice. Because I was going to tell you that I love you last night."

"H-Holy shit…. I— I didn't realise that's what you were trying to say. Had I known that I wouldn't have been able to just stare at him anymore. I would've stuttered, but just from the pure joy that would've filled my heart. I wouldn't have even noticed his appearance, had you just said that."

"I tried to, but then he made his rounds and interrupted me. I tried again, but you were so focused on how he looked that I lost the courage to say anything. I thought you'd changed your mind thinking I was gay and that you'd just moved on."

"No no no Bonnie. I've always liked you a lot. There's something about you that I've never seen in anyone else. A sort of spark inside you that burns bright than in anyone else. You're still trying to hold onto your dreams of being a musician, and that's something that sticks out about you. I love you for that, on top of the fact that you had the courage to tell Freddy how you felt. I knew he'd turn you down, but I wanted to see you try because I love the fact that you were able to build that courage. And secretly, I hoped he would see that and give you a chance anyway. But he didn't, and here we are now."

"I'm gonna be honest, I just wanted to die in that closet. I wanted to stay in there for the rest of my life and sob because I felt like I'd never be worth it to anyone. I'd always be the last one picked, y'know? I couldn't show myself like this to everyone. You're the only person I feel comfortable about sharing this side of me with anymore."

"I understand. But you can't just take random days off like this. I get it, you didn't have much of a choice, but you're going to gave to get it together. The kids out there love your act."

"I know. But, since I've conveyed this, I'll be back out there tomorrow."

"You better," Madelyn said before kissing his cheek, "or else I won't do that again."

Bonnie smiled in reply, before putting his arm around her and kissing her cheek in return.