Hello, everyone. It be I, Torotyrannus15, who, in my own opinoin of myself, am the most creative author of fanfiction. A few of you may know of my first fic, Horns of

War, but now i start anew. K, enough with the sappy-talk. I only came up with this fic about 5 days ago, so it may not be the best. Weeelllllll, U know how this goes.

Disclaimer: I own nothing! Except for Lars (not the Fry-Lars, a new one).


It was half-decent day in New New York, 3013. There were people strolling, hovercars driving, robots muttering, "Kill all humans.", the usual in the city. The Planet

Express building was were it normally was, in that lot, and inside, it was time for that daily meeting with the proprieter of the buisness.

"Good news, everyone!" Said the excited Prof. Hubert Farnseworth as he entered the conference room, which held all of his employees; Hermes Conrad, Amy Wong,

Dr. John Zoidberg, Bender Rodriguez, Turanga Leela, and Phillip J. Fry. They were all sitting around the conference table, awaiting the professer's "good news".

"What is it now, old man? I've probably got some robot things to do right now." Said Bender, grumpily.

"Oh lighten up, Bender. I'm sure the professer has some reason to be excited. Right, Leela?" Fry said.

"I'm not sure, Fry." The purple-haired cyclops answered. "Normally whenever the professer says he has good news, it means that we have to go on some extremely

dangerous, possibly fatal mission to some weird planet."

"The cyclops is correct." Dr. Zoidberg added. "Last time, I almost lost my entire left claw, and I didn't even go on the mission!"

"Plus, he always seems to expect one or more of us to come back dead. It really gets under my skin, mon." Hermes stated.

"Quiet, all of you." The professer said as he sat in his chair. "The missions I give you aren't always horrific. Plus, I've always been able to clone or replicate you

whenever you have died on missions. Probably half of you aren't the originals."

"Wait, what?" Fry asked.

"Nothing, nothing. Anyway, today's mission will be extremely dangerous! According to my speculations, at least 7.3 of you will die a horrifying death!" There was a

collective gasp from the others at the table. "KIDDING! Just kidding! Heh heh heh!"

"Damn you, old man!" Bender shouted.

"Okay, okay. I've had my laugh. Anyway, everyone, today is company mail day!"

"Wooooo! Company mail day! Wait, what's that?" said Fry, like the fool he was.

"Each month, I choose a random day to go through the mail bin and pass out as many letters as I can find to my employees, and that day is today!" Farnseworth

answered. Everyone cheered.

"OK, first up is Hermes, who has a letter from his grandmother, all the way from Jamaica." Said the professer. Hermes opened and read his letter, and a surprised

expression formed on his face.

"What's it say, Hermese?" Leela asked.

"According to this, my grandmother recently had semi-particle brain surgery. The operation went fine, but she says that during the procedure, her neurons somehow got

transferred into the brain of a giant Golapogos tortoise that was also being operated on at a zoo clinic exactly fifteen blocks away! So now she's an old woman in a

tortoise's body!" Exclaimed Hermes.

"Holy crap!" Said Fry.

"Wow. I wonder how that's even possible." Amy thought out loud.

"I guess we'll never know." Said Hermes. "But the good news is that she'll live much longer now, and she says that she looks forward to attending Dwight's grandson's

wedding."

"Okay, next letter is for Amy." the professer said as he handed the Martian girl the envelope. She quickly tore it open and read, but her smile quickly turned into a frown.

"Somethin' bugging you, Mars girl?" Bender sarcastically asked.

"Oh, nothing. It's just that I got another letter from my parents asking if I've gotten married to someone other than Kif, or "the squishy, un-manly idiot", as mom and dad

call him."

"And here's one for Bender, from his great uncle Bottholemew, from Botlivia." said the prof. as he handed the bending unit his letter.

"Oooh! I wonder what's in store for me! Mabye old Bottholemew's battery went dead, and he left all his earthly possetions to his dear old great nephew, Bender." The

robot excitedly said. He ripped open the envelope and read it out loud. "100010101110101 01010101010101010 010101010101010 00100100100-"

"In english please, Bender." Leela said, clearly frustrated.

"Alright, alright, fine! No need to get all testy, meatbag!" Bender started over. "My dearest great nephew, Bender. I feel that I should inform each and every one of my

relatives that my 6th wife, Bolita, has left me in pusuit of her dream to be Calculon's personal stalker. Also, you can't have my castle or my fortune when I die. Your

great uncle Bottholemew. WHAT?! I don't belive this! I deserve to be Calculon's stalker way more than some skanky robo-whore! Stupid uncle."

"Well, with all that said and done, it seems that one letter for Fry, and a second one for Amy." Said the professer as he handed the letters to the employees in question.

Fry opened his letter. "Hey, this says that I owe $140,000 to some DVD club for buying, 'ghost chillers 3: the phasing' and 'dead bot walking'. I don't remember getting

either of those."

"Uh...who knows! Maybe some obscure identy thief stole your name in order to buy and watch those awful movies." Bender said with a nervous look.

"You're right, Bender! That must be what happened!" Fry said. Everyone else just groaned.

"What's your letter say, Amy?" Leela asked.

"Ooh! It's from Kiffy!" Amy whooped in excitment. "Wait, this is an entire page of stuttering with the words, 'how are you, Amy' at the end!"

"Hah hah! Dumb frog-man." Bender joked.

"And this last one is for Scruffy." the professer said as he gave the note to the janitor, who at the moment was mopping the floor.

Scruffy's mustached face did not change as he read. "Says I'm ten years late on my rent. Shoot." with that, he went back to his mopping.

"Well, that's over with." said the professer.

"Isn't there one for me?" Leela asked.

"No, no, no, no, no. Here it is." Farnseworth said. Leela casually opened the envelope and began to read.

"It's from my parents!" the cyclops said with excitment.

"You mean those gross sewer mutants?" Bender said.

"Shut up! And yes. It says, 'Dear Leela, we hope that you're doing OK, and that you are happy, but there is something importent that we have to tell you in person, that

we should have told you a long time ago.' Well that's weird." Leelas said. "What could possibly be so important that they have to tell me in person?"

"What indeed." the professer said forshadowingly. "What indeed."


Foreshadowing, no? Please R&R