AN: another one-shot . . . oh, stop pretending that you're surprised! *grin* . . . this one is a little bit different, tho . .
*insert standard disclaimer here*
*****
All you ever hear about is girls whining; "He doesn't notice me! He doesn't even know that I'm alive."
But oh, he notices me.
He knows that I'm alive.
Sometimes, I've thought that I could tell him. One night, up on the rooftop with nothing between us and that big black sky that he loves so much, I could just reach out my hand to him and say it.
"Jack, I'm in love with you."
But then I come to my senses and realize; I can't.
It's wrong.
It's disgusting.
It's dirty.
He could never feel the same way.
But sometimes, I think he knows. I think he knows and I think that he loves rubbing it in my face, telling me over and over again that I can't have him, he's untouchable, he's a million miles away. I think that he sees me watching him from the shadows, barely able to breathe every time he smiles, every time his eyes flash with laughter, or anger, or anything at all. Every time he waltzes by me with a girl on his arm, his hand perhaps not-so-innocently resting just above her curves, I think that he looks at me and smiles just to enjoy the inner struggle that has got to shine through my eyes. He smiles at me sometimes, an almost malicious smile that makes me weaker than water. Those are the times that I have to physically hold myself back.
Because it's wrong.
It's disgusting.
It's dirty.
He could never feel that way.
.
.
But sometimes, I think that behind that smile, hidden deep in his eyes, is a twinge of regret.
.
Every time, I tell myself to stop kidding myself.
.
.
But sometimes, I can almost believe it.
.
.
.
.
*****
AN: ark . . . my first slash-ish . . . reviews on this one would be SO appreciated, even more so than usual. merci times a bzillion. :) comme toujours with ali's one-shots, who do you think this is? I've got my own idea . . but I'd love to hear yours :)
*insert standard disclaimer here*
*****
All you ever hear about is girls whining; "He doesn't notice me! He doesn't even know that I'm alive."
But oh, he notices me.
He knows that I'm alive.
Sometimes, I've thought that I could tell him. One night, up on the rooftop with nothing between us and that big black sky that he loves so much, I could just reach out my hand to him and say it.
"Jack, I'm in love with you."
But then I come to my senses and realize; I can't.
It's wrong.
It's disgusting.
It's dirty.
He could never feel the same way.
But sometimes, I think he knows. I think he knows and I think that he loves rubbing it in my face, telling me over and over again that I can't have him, he's untouchable, he's a million miles away. I think that he sees me watching him from the shadows, barely able to breathe every time he smiles, every time his eyes flash with laughter, or anger, or anything at all. Every time he waltzes by me with a girl on his arm, his hand perhaps not-so-innocently resting just above her curves, I think that he looks at me and smiles just to enjoy the inner struggle that has got to shine through my eyes. He smiles at me sometimes, an almost malicious smile that makes me weaker than water. Those are the times that I have to physically hold myself back.
Because it's wrong.
It's disgusting.
It's dirty.
He could never feel that way.
.
.
But sometimes, I think that behind that smile, hidden deep in his eyes, is a twinge of regret.
.
Every time, I tell myself to stop kidding myself.
.
.
But sometimes, I can almost believe it.
.
.
.
.
*****
AN: ark . . . my first slash-ish . . . reviews on this one would be SO appreciated, even more so than usual. merci times a bzillion. :) comme toujours with ali's one-shots, who do you think this is? I've got my own idea . . but I'd love to hear yours :)
