Decode
This journal belongs to
The future Dr. Harleen Frances Quinzel
If lost please return to
Gotham City University
First day of classes are over, thank heavens. A lot harder then high school, but it will be worth all the effort. I plan on becoming a world renowned psychiatrist. My dream is to one day land the job every young psychiatrist dreams of, working at Arkham Asylum. I heard stories of Arkham Asylum most of my life. Even living in Brooklyn I still knew of Arkham. As a child Arkham always fascinated me and I guess some fasciations never go away, they just grow and blossom more with age.
Maybe one day someone will write a book about my break troughs with the patients at Arkham. Just like Professor Crane, his specialty is fear. I hear he does some side work at Arkham, but I'm not sure what. He is my favorite professor it does help that he is very handsome. There is something that attracts me to him. Professor Crane is in his mid to late 30's you would think he was older, but he has seen more than his fare share of pain and working at Arkham it would ware on you, even though working with a bunch of college kids can't be any better. He sometimes says we are worse than the patients at Arkham. He dresses in well fitting suits, warm colors that bring out his beautiful icy blue eyes, which are hidden by his slightly crooked thin rectangular glasses. He has a very smooth voice. His class will be the easiest one to pay attention in, hanging on his every word.
Goodness I'm about as bad as the girls from Indiana Jones pretty soon I will have I love you on my eyelids. My other classes where pretty boring. Gymnastics was awesome as always. Getting back into the routine shouldn't be too hard, but I need to work on my layout I can't seem to get my legs straight enough. That just means more practice and escape from all these damn papers… I really hope I don't get that freshman fifteen that everyone complains about. I should get started on these papers. Hopefully Professor Crane likes my paper on the deference on irrational and rational phobias.
Second day wasn't much better. Damn teacher wants us to look back on our childhood and see if we can sight diagnose our family with any mental disorders. Ugh! I really wanted to leave that all back in Brooklyn, but does our past ever stay hidden? I guess not, but one can hope.
Mom calling today just makes matters worse. Dad I guess went gallivanting off with some young little thing….again… I can't even begin to count how many times he left when I was growing up. Hayden, my brother is having his second child with some stripper named Candy-Lane that he was cheating on Madison (his current girlfriend) with.
Mom will end up taking dad back; mom always took dad back though you would have thought she would learn after the ohhh I don't know the 20th time. Dad's mo was to find these young women charm 'em, which I am sure meant he would fuck 'em, then would sweet talk 'em, and steal their money and come running back home. Mom was always to forgiving when it came to dad and my dead beat brother. She was always harder on me I guess 'cause I was the girl and the only hope the family had to get out of the hell hole dad had dug for us into because of his gambling problem.
Hayden got his horrible girlfriend Madison pregnant his junior year of high school, which was her sophomore year. Such a pity Hayden had a bright future he was the captain and star quarterback for our high school. He could have played for the New York Giants. His favorite team, but instead had to drop out to get a job but that didn't last very long. He went to work bought the bare minimum diapers, formula, and wipes for his son Mitch. Then good old Hayden would spend the rest on alcohol and some drugs.
So maybe this is helping. I have figured out my brother has alcohol dependence, alcohol abuse, psychological dependence, and substance dependence. Dad is a whole other story let's see substance dependence, pathological gambling, psychological dependence, neglect, and bipolar disorder. Mom now she had her head screwed on pretty well, but she would be listed under minor depressive disorder and obsessive–compulsive disorder and codependent disorder.
I guess other kids have it worse. I still don't understand dad's reasoning for always running away… mom always said he was doing it to give us a better life but we still lived in a little two bedroom apartment. I remember when Hayden and Madison came to mom with the news that she was two months pregnant… as soon as the words came out mom didn't know what to say I think, that was the first time that she was left speechless. That night I went to gymnastics so I could work on the rings and practice for our meet the following week. Ms. Kay was there and she was proud of how far I had come in using the ring. She was a great coach.
When I got home that night all my clothes, books, and trophies where in the living room piled in a corner. I was pissed. I guess mom said Madison could move in with us since her parents disowned her. It's actually quite sad that her parents just kicked her out. Maybe what Professor Crane says is true "Fear drives everything, your life is governed by fear. Every decision you make is a product of that fear." I guess her parents were afraid. Once Mitch was born Madison would disappear for five out of the seven days of the week, she was nowhere to be found. I feel bad for my nephew.
I should look into getting guardianship of him and my soon to be new nephew once I'm done with school. Professor Crane and I can raise them together; Mitch and the new baby, they would both be little geniuses! We could raise a cute little family. Come on Harleen get it together girl. You don't know anything about Professor Crane it's only been two classes and you are acting like a silly little school girl…. You're just another stupid little college girl with a crush GET OVER YOUR SELF!
