Fic Title: Christmas Without You

Author: I Love NASCAR

Fandom: NCIS

Pairing: Jibbs, Tony/Other

Date: December 8, 2007

Feedback: please

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: The only profit I receive from this story is the feedback you provide. All creative rights to the characters belong to DB, not me.

Summary: A week before Christmas, everything goes wrong.


Jethro Gibbs was coming back inside the building when he spotted the young blonde hurrying towards him. He told the others to go ahead without him and waited for her to catch up. "Thanks," Shelby Gibbs, Jethro's little sister and head counsel for NCIS, greeted him. "I was wondering if you'd be in."

"For you? Always," he answered, only half-teasing. "What's up?" He could tell from the look in her eyes, the same color blue as his own, that something was going on.

"I talked to Jenny."

He groaned, needing to hear no more. "Of course you did. You would think that once in the last ten years, you would take my side."

"I will," she answered. "If you're ever right." She pushed the elevator button to stop between floors, her brother's version of a private office. "Just so happens that Jenny's usually the one who's right, so she's the one I side with."

The Jenny she referred to was, of course, Jennifer Shepherd, director of NCIS, his one time partner and girlfriend, a mutual best friend to them both. "She was quick. We just argued about it this morning."

She ignored his comment, continuing their conversation. "All she wants to do is have a Christmas party for the team. What's so wrong with that?" Besides her, the people her brother worked with were his only family. Jenny knew that and had attempted to give him a family Christmas, of sorts.

"I don't celebrate Christmas, Shelby. You know that. She knows that. But she goes on and does whatever the hell she wants to and then gets mad at me when I tell her no. Nothing new about that."

She chose her next words very carefully. "Do you think that Kelly would want you to give up Christmas?" She remembered the last holiday she'd celebrated with him, when his daughter and first wife were still alive, right before he went off to Desert Storm. "You know she wouldn't. You know it." One of her fondest memories of her niece were of the little girl having to be carried to bed after falling asleep waiting for Santa to come. "You have to stop this."

"Stop what? Missing my daughter?" The wound Shannon's passing had left had eventually healed over time, although there'd only been one other person he'd loved as he loved her. Kelly's death, however, was just as fresh as if it had been yesterday.

"I did not say that. You're never going to stop missing Kelly. But you push everyone out of your life that you could get close to, who you could love, and who only wants to help you." She finally said what she'd been wanting to since Jenny's return. "Jenny is not the only reason you two are not back together. Her being director doesn't help matters, but for God's sake, you were married the first time you two were together." She paused. "You won't let Jen near you because you're afraid you'll lose her. So you're going to pull away before she can. It's a hell of a way to live."

His pride wouldn't let him admit that she was right, so he covered up with anger. "Like you would know. The only reason you're butting into my love life is that you don't have one of your own, just transient boyfriends who are married either to another woman or to their work. No one you could get attached with, no one you could have a family with, no attachments of any kind…" He stopped in mid-sentence, realizing he'd gone too far, realizing who he was hurting. "Shelby…"

She stood there in shock, not knowing how to respond at first, feeling the pain as keenly as if he'd slapped her. "No." She paused, her words coming slowly. "I should start focusing on me, on my life, and stop worrying about what you're throwing away, how you're going to be all alone, because you pushed everyone who did give a damn away, and end up either like Daddy, dead within a year of retirement, or Franks, drunk all the time…" She reached over, pushing the button to make the elevator continue its journey, standing away from him, her arms crossed.

Gibbs wanted to admit that she was right, about some of it at least, and apologize for what he'd said, but he couldn't find the words. When the elevator stopped at their floor, she went upstairs to get Jenny for their half day off and he went to his desk, not speaking.


Jenny Shepherd was still tired at the end of her long day, but it was a good tired, a relaxed tired instead of stressed. She'd been glad when Shelby had moved to D.C., glad to have another female friend to do things with, like Christmas shopping. Even better still had been the chance to go off the radar for once, go without her bodyguard, not have to report in. "I got something for everyone except your brother."

"Give him something to remove the big stick out of his butt," Sherry soused, making sure the honey she'd picked up wouldn't break all over everything else.

Jenny laughed. "Yeah, that's holiday talk." She paused. "I shouldn't have forced the issue. He's right. He's never celebrated Christmas. I just…I don't know what to do. I thought he was getting better and then the holidays…"

For the first time, Shelby began to wonder if maybe more was going on than originally met the eye. "Jen…" She paused. "Are you okay?"

The redhead started to respond before a cracking sound rang through the air, the world going black.