Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight just the plot & anything never mentioned in the series.

P.O.D. Punishable On Dating

Chap1: BBQ Ribs


Both packs are at the site where their bonfires are held helping their imprints and friends get it together for the reservation's bonfire later tonight and what do you know Jacob and Leah are arguing…again! They have been arguing nonstop for weeks now with no end in sight and it's driving everyone crazy including the Cullens whose home they are sent to when their arguing gets too loud…or violent where Leah is concerned. The worst part about their fighting, they fight over stupid things…

"Yes you did!"-Jacob said angrily as he balled his fists

"No the hell I didn't how are you going to tell me what I did or didn't say you turd!"-Leah said just as angry and even took a step to get in his face.

"You're so full of shit Clearwater."-Jacob growled and shook slightly. Leah scoffed then laughed evilly.

"Fuck. You."-she hissed

"I would, but I might catch something."-he smirked and she growled and shoved him and was about to smack him when Sam grabbed her arm and carried her away.

"Let me go so I can kick his ass!"-she screamed as she kicked and flailed about.

"Yeah let her go so I can whoop her ass Nice. And. Slow."-Jacob said slowly as he gestured his hand back and forth as if he had her over his knee spanking her. This drove Leah mad and started growling more fiercely and bit Sam on the arm to get away.

"Ow!"-he screeched and released her to grab his arm and she flew forward ready to phase and rip Jacob apart. Jacob yanked his shirt off and crouched waiting for the attack and for a second Leah faltered when his muscles flexed as he did so, but of course that didn't last long.

"Stop!"-Billy yelled just having arrived with Sue shaking her head as she walked behind him seeing her daughter and his son in yet another fight.

"She bit me, she actually bit me!"-Sam said in disbelief

"Oh suck it up."-Billy said as he waved his hand dismissively making the packs snicker. Leah and Jacob were right in front of each other glaring and growling as they breathed heavily. Jacob would never hit or fight a girl, but Leah was making him reconsider.

"What on earth is going on here?"-Billy asked once he was right next to the two angry wolves. Neither said anything and continued to glare at the other; at least they stopped growling. Billy moved so that the two would have to back up and with this angle Jacob could now see down Leah shirt with every breath she took and he had to admit he was enjoying the display in front of him, maybe even a little too much. He kept staring and found himself growling deep within his chest causing Leah to growl back and damnit if that wasn't the sexiest thing he'd ever beheld. It wasn't until Sue cleared her throat to get them to stop growling did Jacob realize he was growling to begin with. He played it off like it was an angry growl when in reality it was a happy growl, a very very happy growl.

"One of you want to let us in on why you are trying to kill each other…again?"-Sue said stepping forward eyeing the two. Leah huffed and crossed her arms making Jacob scowl at the loss of his view.

"It's his fault he started it."-she said point and glaring at him and he gave her the finger.

"Fuck you too asswhole!"-she hissed and stepped forward.

"You know it would be nice if two of you other wolves stand over here behind these two."-Sue said scanning the crowd of onlookers.

"Oh right sorry."-Embry said coming up behind Leah, but her glare sent him over to Jacob. No one wanted to get bitten or have her wrath turned to them, so they all looked around to each other and finally all eyes landed on Seth. He looked up wide eyed and tried to shrink away.

"Let's go boy."-Old Quil said in his usual grouchy tone. Seth sighed and stepped forward behind Leah. They all knew she wouldn't hurt him…too bad.

"Now let's try this again."-Billy said. Jacob sighed and relaxed his stance.

"Leah is mad at me because she told me t-"

"I did not tell you to do anything."-she hissed; Billy put his hand up silencing her.

"As I was saying Leah told me to put more barbeque sauce on the ribs, but she forgot she told me and came up behind me while I was doing it and started yelling at me."-Jacob said crossing his arms

"You two are arguing because Leah told you to put more barbeque sauce on ribs?"-Old Quil said dryly, but was still a little disbelieving.

"I did not tell him to put more sauce on them he did that on his own. Now they're going to be dry and rough just like his skin."-she huffed and Billy and Sue didn't know if they should laugh or sigh.

"Answer this; will it make a difference to either of you or anyone else in the packs if they are dry and rough or moist and tender?"-Sue asked. The packs snorted like it was obvious, but Leah and Jacob were too pigheaded to answer even though everyone knew the answer.

"I didn't think so. Because you two want to act so childishly you have to eat those ribs."-Billy said, but frowned thinking this wasn't much of a punishment because to be honest he'd still eat them himself. Then again these two are drama queens.

"What?"-they both yelled then glared at each other.

"You heard me you two eat the dry ribs and everyone else gets the ones made right. Oh and I want you both to finish grilling together to make up for the time we've wasted on this ridiculousness."-Billy said and wheeled away; everyone went back to what they were doing, but watched the two closely.

"This is all your fault."-Jacob hissed pointing his finger at her.

"How is this my fault?"-she hissed back as she slapped his hand away.

"You should have never told me to put on the barbeque sauce only to turn around and do it yourself."-he said balling his fist

"I did not ask you to do that you stupid shit face!"-Leah screeched and stomped her foot. Jacob opened his mouth, but Old Quil clearing his throat ended his rant before it started, so he just pointed at her and walked back over to the grill.

"I'm not eating what they're making."-Quil said to Jared who nodded his agreement.

"Good I'll eat both your shares."-Paul said grinning while patting his stomach. He'd been sitting on his ass the entire time not helping in the least.

"Fat ass."-Jared said shaking his head

"Jealous."-Paul smirked then stretched out like he was on the beech trying to get a tan.

J+L=J+L=J+L=J+L

Later that night the bonfire was in full swing and all of La Push was there, so the wolves knew to keep their usually open conversation closed and anger under control. Leah was sitting on a log by the forest staring sadly at her ribs and had a look like she was about to cry.

"This is all your fault."-her nemesis said as he seated himself next to her. Leah growled and moved away from him, but he grinned and scooted closer with each move she made and eventually she ran out of log and fell on her ass. Jacob laughed loudly drawing attention and some people were stupid enough to laugh and point at Leah on the ground. She growled low enough so no one but Jacob would hear and slowly, eerily sat her plate down and began to stand. Jacob grabbed her to sit her back down before she massacred the poor bastards, but he pulled too hard and she landed in his lap.

"What are you doing?"-she huffed and fought his grip around her waist, but he wouldn't give making her growl again

"You can't hurt humans or give our secret away calm down."-he hissed as she still struggled. It was when his wolf senses heard the curious whispers of are they together and she is so lucky or they are so cute together did he realized to an outsider their current position looked promiscuous. He let her go and because she was struggling she flew backwards and reached out to stop her fall, but only succeeded in pulling him down on top of her.

"What the hell was that?"-she screamed in his face furious he threw her.

"You wanted me to let go."-he shrugged then whistles from the pack could be heard.

"Get off of me."-she hissed trying to shove him off

"You know I thought fuck you was just an expression, I never knew you meant it. I mean I don't mind, but it's a little public don't you think?"-he said smirking then squealed like a girl when her knee collided between his legs. His eyes watered as he rolled off Leah and collapsed on his side clutching himself. Leah stood up smirking and dusted herself off before walking away to get more food. Jacob's pack ran over to him trying to hold in their laughter as they helped him into a sitting position.

"You alright Jake?"-Quil asked as he cleared his throat like his life depended on it. Jacob's face was red when he looked up and his cheeks were puffed out trying to keep his girly screams and moans in.

"You uh want some ice for that?"-Embry asked coughing like his life depended on it rather than Quil's throat clearing.

"No I'm-I'll be fine just give me a minute."-Jacob squeaked out and the guys couldn't hold it any longer and laughed loudly drawing more attention to the scene and causing chuckles to spread throughout the bonfire. The idiots who laughed before were more reluctant to laugh out right as they did with Leah since Jacob was so huge, but they were still stupid enough to chuckle. That is until Jacob stood up sending daggers around the camp. He tried to step forward, but his knees were wobbly.

"Jake dude maybe you should sit down and wait for your uh…wait for the pain to go away."-Seth suggested as he kept him upright. Jacob took a deep breath and released himself from Seth's hold.

"No I'm fine, but I want to apologize."-he said to Seth

"For what?"-he asked confused

"For killing your sister."-he said then scanned the crowd and sniffed the air to find her. He smelled her scent coming from the food area and looked over to see her filling a plate with the good ribs. He squared his shoulders and moved forward.

"I don't think that's such a good idea."-Quil said wearily, but Jacob ignored him and continued his angry walk towards a happy Leah.

"What the hell Leah, you didn't have to go that far."-he growled angrily. Those who were getting food made a hasty retreat when they saw him coming knowing no good would come from this. Leah turned around with a chicken wing hanging from her mouth.

"Ykggy asklfeig foru."-she said smirking with the chicken still in her mouth. Jacob snatched it and threw it towards the trees.

"Hey I was eating that!"-she yelled glaring at him. From across the camp the council was shaking their heads and Billy and Sue looked at each other in silent apologies for their kid's behavior.

"You could have just shoved me off of you."-he said angrily

"You asked for it."-she simply shrugged

"Mad because you don't get to use it?"-he smirked and she balled her fist

"Gah!"-she said and went to go back to her seat when he grabbed her arm.

"What are you doing we aren't allowed to eat the goods ribs thanks to you"-he said pointing at the plate in her right hand which was full of mouthwatering, non-rough or dry ribs.

"Well since it was your fault I figured I was exempt from their little ban on good ribs, but you go ahead and enjoy the dry ones I'll even let you have mine."-she said smiling

"If I don't get any neither do you."-he said reaching for her plate and she pulled it back and shielded it with her body.

"You touch my ribs and I'll break yours."-she growled glaring at him. They were very still for a moment like the calm before the storm.

"Uh oh that can't be good."-Billy said as he watched the two

"Embry Seth."-Sue said gesturing towards the two very still wolves, but it was too late. Jacob moved to snatch her plate the same time she moved to dodge him making her food spill.

"You piece of shit!"-she hissed and lunged taking him off guard and they pummeled into the food table and took it out making food fly everywhere. They rolled around wrestling with Leah throwing jabs and Jacob trying to grab her and keep her still. They rolled over to the other food tables taking them out as well and finally the drink table.

"Food fight!"-some boys yelled and before anyone could blink food began to fly through the air. Jacob and Leah were still at it when the pack made it over to break them up.

Finally after about twenty minutes the situation was under control, but everyone was already covered in food and drinks. Everyone in their twenties and younger were grinning from ear to ear, but those older were scowling. Jacob and Leah were held at opposite ends of the camp and were covered in more food than anyone else.

"I guess the bon fire is over?"- said Old Quil who somehow managed out of everyone to stay clean as he walked over to a salad covered Billy.

"Yeah I guess it is."-he said and everyone cleared out. Feeling their parent's gazes on them, Leah and Jacob both try to slip away in the crowd, but it's kind of hard when you're built like a gladiator.

"Get over here."-Billy and Sue said to their kids who begrudgingly obeyed and stalked toward them.

"Because of your antics, you two incited a riot."-Sue said

"A food fight is hardly riot."-Leah said rolling her eyes and Jacob actually agreed with her. Billy and Sue gave a mom and dad stare down shutting the two teens up.

"You two are going to stay here as long as it takes and clean this mess up."-Sue said

"By ourselves?"-Jacob exclaimed dramatically waving his hands around to the mess that was created.

"Yes by yourselves."-Billy said as he and Sue turned to go to the car and leave the two to their task.

"This is all your fault."-Jacob said poking Leah

"If you wouldn't have tried to steal my food this never would have happened."-she hissed poking him back.

"Whatever let's just get this over with."-he huffed and she huffed back and grabbed a trash bag and started picking things up.

"Here let me help you with the barbeque sauce."-Jacob said ad she turned around confused until he bowed his head and gave her a long lick across her neck.

"There all clean."-he said laughing as she stood there frozen and eyes wide.

"You did not just do that!"-she said shocked

"Oh yes I did."-he said then licked her face. She flinched for just a second before chasing him. He didn't get far before she tackled him and tried her best to keep her promise and break his ribs. Sue and Billy heard shuffling and turned to see their children at it again. Sue sighed.

"What are we going to do with them?"-she said shaking her head.

"You know you liked it!"-Jacob laughed as Leah pounded him in the ribs and was effective in breaking one making him yelp and flip her over, but then kept rolling. This time Billy sighed.

"I say we sell them in the black market."-he said and Sue looked over at him.

"That's wrong Billy we can't do that. What if they find our address and send them back."-she said and they continued to the car leaving their children to try and kill each other.


AN: This idea popped into my head this morning it's only a two shot and I already have the other part written, but I'm hungry so I'm going to make something to eat then edit and post the second part.