Santana always knew she loved her best friend Brittany, she didn't accept it necessarily, but she knew. Advice on that matter was never an option, she was pretty sure her parents would freak out if she told them and her grandmother would probably never want to see her again. She'd say she was a disgrace for their family, that she would ruin their reputation in Lima. Who cares about Lima anyway? And that's why everybody thought she slept with a lot of people. Honestly she didn't sleep with half of them, she'd make them say that they did -because seriously, who wouldn't want to claim that they slept with the head cheerleader?- but she never actually slept with them. Her situation was sort of like in that movie she recently watched with her other best friend Quinn. Easy A. Even though she didn't sleep with the guys for popularity like the case was in that movie.
And how hot was Emma Stone in it? That's not gay at all, just a typical girl thing. It was on one of those movie nights that she told Quinn about the possibility that she might be gay and that she was certain that she was in love with Brittany. She expected the catholic girl to flip a few and start a rant about how it was a sin and that she was just confused, but the blonde just let out a deep breath before a beaming smile graced her face. After about ten seconds, she couldn't contain her excitement anymore and she just exclaimed a relieved: "Finally!"
With a confused look, Santana had asked her what she meant by that. And when Quinn told her that she'd waited for her to find out about that and come to terms with it, she couldn't help but laugh with her best friend.
It was because of those events that she found herself in front of Brittany, trying to tell her that she was in love with her by saying that them sleeping together meant more to her than it should.
Unfortunately the blonde didn't seem to understand completely, 'cause she just looked at the Latina with a cute frown on her face while she asked her what she meant by that precisely.
Santana took a deep breath before starting the huge speech she'd prepared about how in love that she was with her and that she wanted to be the reason for the gorgeous smile on the taller girl's face.
Brittany tried to listen carefully to what the brunette had to say, but honestly she'd tuned out on the word 'love'.
Santana seemed to have noticed the glassy look in the dancer's eyes, since she stopped mid-speech to ask if something was wrong. Before Brittany could process anything though, she felt herself moving away from the confused girl. When she realized that she'd left, she was already at the main entrance of the school.
Santana just stood in the middle of the hallway, staring blankly at the spot that her best friend just occupied. She had to tell Quinn about this, she would know what to do. After making up her mind and coming to the conclusion that Brittany wasn't going to come back to apologize while she kissed her senseless and told her that she loved her back over and over again, she walked over to her other best friend's locker to tell her the turn of events and ask for advice.
Quinn looked at her knowingly when she told her about the glassy look in their blonde best friend's eyes, but she didn't say anything.
The day after that Brittany approached her and liked their pinkies like nothing happened. Like she didn't walk out while Santana was pouring her heart out to her. The brunette furrowed her eyebrows and glanced at the blonde before looking straight forward again.
"What are you doing?" She asked the bubbly girl in a cold voice.
"Walking to class with you? We have History now, right? Or was it P.E.? Wait then I have to go get my bag..." The blonde rambled on, after having summed up about every possible subject -even classes she wasn't following like AP Chemistry and having thrown in something about unicorns and Lord Tubbington, Santana interrupted her.
"No, I mean what are you doing holding my pinkie? I'm pretty sure I should be mad at you." Santana replied in the same harsh voice as before. But the blonde just kept walking and looked like she had no idea what Santana was talking about. Either she was really good in pretending to be oblivious, or she was actually really dumb.
Santana knew better though, even though everyone at school seemed to believe the latter, Santana knew the blonde wasn't dumb. So why was she pretending to not know what Santana was talking about?
"Why?" Brittany asked in that same oblivious tone.
"Because I told you I love you and you didn't say you love me back." Santana tried to keep it cool, but she could feel the tears welling up in her eyes.
"But, I really like you," Brittany said in that adorable voice that nobody seemed to be able to resist.
"You like me?" Santana asked unbelievingly, "well, that's just great, now everything is suddenly perfect, because Brittany S. Pierce likes me," she continued sarcastically, "you know who I like?" the brunette asked, but she didn't wait for an answer, "I like my neighbor's dog, I like that adorable little kid that tries to sell me cookies every few months, I like pie. That's what I like, but I said I loved you B, and you just seem so afraid to say the 'L-word'-"
"What do you mean? I say lesbians all the time." Brittany interrupted her mid-rant.
"No B, love, not 'lesbians'." If Santana was being honest, she would admit that she had trouble not laughing at that comment, it had Brittany written all over it and she loved that side of her. Well, she loved every side of her.
"Wait, that show is about love? I thought it was about lesbians, Lord T always tells me to turn it off, 'cause he doesn't like it, but honestly I do like it. Will you watch it with me sometime San? We'll watch season 2, I think Shane islike totally hot there. And Carmen too, she's Latina just like you, how cool is that? Isn't it such a coincidence how the show is about love, but they're all lesbians and that starts with an 'l' too?" Santana let an honest laugh slip at that, that was the Brittany she loved, not the serious one that walked away from her. She knew better than to explain, but she tried anyway, because now they were in that bubble again, that bubble they had created over all the years that was just for them. Maybe it was okay that Brittany didn't want to be with her because she was clearly afraid of love, maybe she should wait until she was ready to come out to her parents anyway.
Because this was how they were at their best. In their own little bubble, that nobody could possibly pop. They would be together eventually, because Quinn said so. And Quinn just knows things. Like she knew how Mercedes and Sam would be together. Like, who saw that one coming? Well, Quinn did. And that's why she was certain that she and Brittany would be alright.
