Disclaimer: Own nothing
Summary: Jealousy is a dangerous thing, but as Nylutha points out to Katara, so are wasted opportunities. Sequel to "An inferno amongst the glaciers." Three years before "The sin of envy."
Wasted opportunities:
Or I will:
The small village of the Southern Water Tribe were beginning to settle down after their "guest's" "outburst" had been calmed by Katara when she and the other waterbenders had retrieved her from the many glaciers she had been chasing the Avatar on. Many were whispering in shock, stunned by the action that the firebender had made. Some of them were terrified. Some of them were amazed. Some of them felt both emotions equally. Either way, they these were reactions were caused by the same source; they had never witnessed such immense power from any firebender, ever. It didn't matter what raid or what soldier they had encountered. There truly had never been another firebender they had ever seen that could exude such abilities.
Katara walked away from her brother Sokka who was pulling Appa's reins so that the sky bison could be placed in front of the tiger-seal huts in the center of the tribe. Once the sky bison's reins were tied, a flock of children immediately ran to the beast, joyfully giggling as they started climbing on him again.
Katara marched over to where she spotted Nylutha at one of the ice barricades on the cusp of the tribe. She could see the other woman watching Azula walk away. Katara's teeth clenched. It wasn't just Nylutha watching Azula that bothered her; it was what she saw in the waterbender's eyes that troubled Katara. She saw longing in the Northern Water Tribe woman's blue orbs. Longing! Katara's stomach twisted at the thought.
"Hey," She announced, moving till she was standing right in front of the black haired waterbender, whose attention was now on Katara, "I don't know why you think you get to tell Azula what to do or why you think you know her better than anyone here, but you don't know her that well."
Black eyebrows were lifted above sapphire eyes. "Where is this coming from Katara?" Nylutha asked, lifting her eyebrows as if her fellow waterbender was some bizarre creature she had never lain eyes on before, "We're all just looking after Azula like we're supposed to, right? What's the problem?"
Katara clenched her jaws together. "My problem is," She started, an indignant flare shooting off violently in her, "that you think you can tell her what to do. You don't know her!"
"Like you do?" Nylutha asked, challenge in her husky voice as she crossed her arms over her chest, a smirk beginning to play at the waterbender's lips, "Is that what your problem is, Katara? And don't think I don't know where this is going. I must say, I never pegged you as the jealous type."
The blood drained from Katara's face. Her teeth clenched harder. Now Nylutha was clearly mocking her. "No," She snapped at the black haired woman, "You don't know her like I do. She's unwell and erratic, as you just saw and you're taking advantage of her! She needs help, not for someone to play with her feelings."
Nylutha cocked her head and her expression became undeniably amused. "And when have I ever displayed any evidence of playing with Azula's feelings?" She asked, her tone dripping with mirth, "I genuinely care about her, Katara. If you want me to answer you with complete honesty, yes, I am hoping to have an actual relationship with her, but I never got any impression that you wanted to be with her. You never told me, and you never told her. How was I supposed to know you had feelings for her? But one thing I will say," Nylutha straightened herself upwards, her face and voice becoming serious, "I will say that I at least will never treat Azula like she's as fragile as glass. You treating her like she's a child won't help her. She needs to be respected, not pitied. I'm not going to treat her like she's a child. I'm going to treat her like an adult even though I know she has problems. Don't condescend her, Katara, or else Azula won't be the last person you lose to someone else."
Katara was taken aback by this proclamation. It felt like it came completely out of the blue. The lingering threat of what Nylutha said; the implications were infuriating enough, but what the other waterbender said about 'condescending' the princess…..
"I don't condescend her," Katara protested, staring in disbelief at the other woman, "I don't treat her like a child."
"Oh no?" Nylutha prodded dismissively, "And what about when Azula first was brought here? What about when you were explaining to her how the healing was going to work for her? How about you not allowing her out of your sight for even a second? How about you feeling like you can tell her what to do all the time whenever you feel like she's doing something she's not supposed to? You're not her mother, and if you keep treating her like you are then you'll push her away. And when you do," Nylutha stepped back, smirking now at Katara's appalled face, "I'll be there for Azula with open arms. So don't waste your opportunity, because I swear, I intend to take complete advantage of mine. Offer a relationship with her, Katara, or I will."
Nylutha nodded as if in absolution and walked off, leaving a stunned and infuriated Katara in her wake.
Nylutha walked past all the tiger-seal skin huts till she reached one of the seamstress's huts, following Azula. She knew she was being somewhat of a hypocrite pursuing the princess like this, but she needed to make sure Azula was calm. She watched as the Fire Nation princess removed her dyed black tiger-seal skin shoes, placing both now bare feet onto the large white polar bear-dog furs strewn across the icy floor to keep her legs warm, presenting the damaged shoes to Mya and Ailia. Both Water Tribe women glanced at each other and then back at Azula, bursting out into fits of giggles. Azula glared at them and Nylutha was trying to hide her smirk with one of her hands.
"I am so pleased that there is amusement for the two of you in my ruined shoes," The princess started, narrowing her eyes, "But these both need repairs. I know both of you are the most competent in this whole village when it comes to sewing. So I need these fixed." Azula took on a look of severe discomfort for almost a minute before grunting out, "Please."
Both Mya and Ailia seemed startled by the firebender's last word, having never heard them uttered by her ever in their time of knowing her. Nylutha, while stunned herself, allowed a smile to grace her features. She had suggested that next time Azula wanted something done for her that maybe she should try asking nicely. Of course, as expected, she had to repeat this almost seventeen times till finally the firebender absorbed the lesson, but now it looked like the advise paid off.
The still befuddled Mya and Ailia took the shoes, each Water Tribe woman taking one. They hesitated, then they proceeded with needles and more tiger-seal skin shreds.
Nylutha's smile widened as she spoke, "I'll get you some extra shoes from my hut while you're waiting, Azula." The firebender looked at the other young woman curiously and Nylutha responded, "You shouldn't be barefoot in this kind of climate for long, even if you are a firebender." She turned and exited the seamstress's hut running out to her own. She went into hers, retrieved a pair that she suspected fit Azula's feet and walked out, noticing out of the corner of her eye that Katara was still watching her. The other waterbender was near the aloof sky bison and the Avatar. Nylutha glowered as she closed in on the hut where Azula and the seamstresses still were.
She hated it when people got angry at her simply because she was doing something that they didn't like, when most of the time what she was doing didn't hurt anyone at all. She was from the Northern Water Tribe so as a result she was much more used to rigid rules, stiff etiquette and unfortunately, misogyny than she suspected Katara and the other waterbender's brother were used to. Katara's grandmother, Kanna might have been from the Northern Water Tribe originally, but Katara and Sokka themselves had no idea what it was like.
It was changing now obviously. Master Pakku's acceptance of Katara as his pupil and Yue becoming the moon goddess and escaping her marriage had changed a great deal of things. There were still many expectations socially that were put upon the shoulders of the women of the North, but no real rules anymore. Nylutha knew now that it was safe to go back without being forced into marriage or other unjust lifestyles, but she had left for a reason; because she was afraid that the Northern Water Tribe would fall back into its old ways.
But she missed her home and her family. She missed her mother, father and little brothers. She missed her people. She hoped one day, if everything had changed for the better in the Northern Water Tribe and the women of their tribe were allowed the same equal rights as the men in a few years, and if Azula accepted her feelings that the firebender would come with her to the North Pole. She hoped so.
Nylutha gave another and longer glance at Katara as she was about to enter Mya and Ailia's hut. Katara saw her as a threat. That was a good thing. Katara should see her that way. Even though Nylutha could never predict how Azula would react to her feelings, she knew for sure that she would certainly do everything in her power to win the firebender's affections, even if she wasn't successful in the end.
And there was one thing for sure that Nylutha was determined to never let Katara know. Nylutha knew the reason why Azula had attacked the Avatar. She heard about the Avatar burning Katara's hands just as well as Azula had. While it proved that Azula wasn't as immune to emotions as she'd have many of them think, which sent an exuberantly hot thrill through Nylutha, it also told the waterbender one thing; that Azula cared about Katara. So that left only one terrible truth that Nylutha had to hide from Katara. That one truth was that in the end...Katara was a threat too. Thankfully, Nylutha was very good at hiding her insecurities, and very good at bravado.
That night:
Katara raised her body up when she heard the squirming and thrashing in the next hut over. She heard cloth and furs being tossed and objects that sounded like they were of metal being clattered onto the ice. The waterbender narrowed her eyes, concerned. She pulled herself up out of the furs she had wrapped herself in before falling asleep. She slipped on her shoes and wandered out of her tent. The noises sounded like they were coming from…..from Azula's tent.
The brown haired bender moved over to the tent, wanting to check up on her princess. She heard more struggling and closed in on the tent, seeing an obscured figure behind the tiger-seal skin moving horizontally, as if in pain on the patches of ice.
"I wouldn't go in there if I were you." A voice said calmly from the left of Katara, making the healer jump and turn, bending water out of the ice below her in small threatening, coiling waves, only to halt her defense and allow the water to drop and splatter when she saw Nylutha sitting down with her knees drawn to her chest, two feet to the left of Azula's tent.
"What are you doing here, Nylutha?" Katara snapped, tensing up, heat traveling to her cheeks.
Nylutha waved her hand dismissively. The black haired bender smirked as she started talking, "Don't worry about me. This has become somewhat of a tradition for me. She's having a nightmare, you know. Azula. She gets a lot of nightmares."
Katara looked back at the tent and saw the figure's shadow turning and writhing again. She sighed, lowering her head sadly, "I know. I wish there was something I could do for her."
"Maybe there is." Was Nylutha's surprisingly serene response. Katara shot her head up and looked at the other Water Tribe woman, questions in her blue eyes. Nylutha smiled, her own blue eyes deceptive. "You could always offer to comfort her after she wakes up from her nightmares." The shaggy haired waterbender answered, speaking as if she was describing the most normal act in the world.
Katara almost laughed, "I've tried that. I've offered to heal her or hug her or even hold her while she sleeps. I've offered all that. I've tried to comfort her. She won't accept."
Nylutha lifted an eyebrow and her eyes held a mischief to them that told Katara that the other woman was about to say something very offensive.
Nylutha spoke again, this time her voice held a salacious edge to it, "I wasn't talking about that kind of comfort."
It took a moment for Katara to register what her sister Water Tribe member said and then she actually stepped back when she fully realized what the other waterbender was insinuating. She stared, heart pounding in her chest.
"Are you insane?!" She almost shouted before the now smirking Nylutha put a finger to her lips and nodded towards Azula's tent. Katara gave a frantic glance at the said tent and then back at Nylutha.
"I'm not going to offer to have sex with Azula just because she has nightmares!" Katara hissed, "Firstly, I'm not going to have sex with her when we don't have a relationship, secondly I'm not going to take advantage of her like that."
Nylutha rolled her eyes as she lowered her hand back to her side. "Oh Katara," The black haired bender chuckled, "So dramatic. You won't be taking advantage of her, so long as you make sure she's awake and you ask her permission. And of course if she says no, then respect her wishes. If she wants you to stop, respect her wishes. There won't be any taking advantage as long as you abide by that and respect her. What's the problem?"
Katara stared. This was bizarre. After this afternoon, shouldn't Nylutha be trying desperately to keep her away from Azula, not encouraging her to go after the princess?
Nylutha must have found her expression amusing, as she grinned and supplied, cocking her head at Katara in a show of complete arrogance, "I don't feel threatened by you. You won't do it. You treat her like a child but you don't have the courage to admit how you feel. So I don't think you're that much of a threat. Think I'm wrong? Then wait till she wakes up from her nightmare and ask her if she wants to take comfort in your arms. But you won't, will you? You're too timid when it comes to your feelings. You can't just take what you want, even if it's offered, so you'll never ask. But I'll ask one day. And who knows, maybe she'll accept."
Fiery rage unlike any Katara had ever known exploded in her craw, and the waterbender felt ice beginning to crack beneath her feet as she glared azure daggers at the other. Nylutha chuckled, "Careful, Katara. Don't want to destroy any of your home, do you? We just got around to repairing it after Azula's rampage on the Avatar. I'm not making any threats, I'm pointing out facts. Azula deserves love and care and warmth, and if you don't offer to give it to her...then know that I will."
Two spurts of freezing water shot up from the ground, curling themselves around Nylutha's throat, pulling upwards and dragging the shaggy haired woman off the ice.
A startled look crossed Nylutha's face before she lowered her shoulders, the smirk returning as she stared down at Katara, the other waterbender's hands raised, bending, a furious stare burning into the black haired young woman. "I'm not going to bend or defend myself." Nylutha said, voice having that same frustrating calm tone as it always did, "I'm not going to send water at you or anything. Everyone knows that you have a problem with me being near Azula. If I end up trapped in an iceberg like our dear friend, Aang once was, or having all of my blood pulled out of my body, who do you think will be to blame? Azula certainly doesn't have those abilities. I'm afraid that the only suspect will be you. And judging by what you're doing right now, Katara, they'll be right."
Katara's jaw clenched, she looked like steam was about to spew from both ears. Nylutha remained suspended in the air till the brown haired waterbender let out a growl and lowered her arms, dropping the other to the frozen ground hard, forcing a pained groan from the Northern Water Tribe woman as she flinched on impact.
The water spilled into her clothes and dropped back into the glacier's floor.
Katara stared down at the once again smirking woman. "You won't touch her." The Southern Water Tribe woman hissed out in a deathly quiet voice, though she knew Nylutha heard.
"Isn't that Azula's decision?" Nylutha asked, rubbing the back of her neck with her right hand, "If you don't think it is then I'm sorry to say that I'm pretty sure I'm respecting Azula far more than you are."
The ice beneath both benders cracked a little as Katara tensed up again and her fists clenched. All of the water and the ice however, remained where they were. "I want you to get up off the ice and go to your tent and sleep." Katara snapped, "I don't want you hanging around her tent. Leave."
Nylutha sighed, raising herself up to a stand and wiped the water and dust off her dark blue robes. "Don't waste this opportunity, Katara," She said as she walked past her fellow Water Tribe member, "because I see a pretty good one myself. Luckily, I don't think you're brave enough."
Katara's burning blue eyes were watchful of Nylutha until the black haired woman was back in her respective tent. She then looked over at Azula's tent, still hearing the groans and whimpers. She felt a harsh pull in her chest at the noises. She hated hearing them. Nylutha's words resounded in her head, "Azula deserves love and care and warmth, and if you don't offer to give it to her…..then know that I will."
Something heavy and dry made its home in Katara's throat. She felt like she couldn't swallow or breathe. If she just stepped into Azula's hut, waited till she awoke and offered the princess love and warmth….just like she had been wanting to give the unstable firebender for years now, then...
Heat welled up in her cheeks and she looked away from the hut, almost shaking. How could she think such a thing? Azula was mentally unbalanced. She was going to do the honorable thing and not take advantage of the princess's state. Somehow keeping her resolve, Katara inhaled and turned away, walking back to her own hut, slipping in, getting back under her furs as she kicked off her shoes and tried to get back to sleep.
Katara somehow was able to drift off, but her eyes never left the side of the tent as if she could see through the material of the skin and observe Azula's silhouette.
In her own tent, Nylutha contemplated what just happened, securing the plethora of black timber bear-wolf fur around her person. What she knew now was this: Katara hadn't made her move yet. She had invariably suspected it, but now she knew that for sure. Katara was too nervous; too self-conscious and worried that she would do the morally "wrong" thing to do when it came to Azula. That was her weakness. And Nylutha saw her opening there.
And on the plus side, it looked like Katara believed her when she had very much lied that she didn't see the other bender as a threat. There might be some hope yet in getting Katara out of the picture.
