When Love and Death Embrace

Duo/Hilde/Wu-Fei Arc

This is the first of three separate Arcs involving various couples in Gundam wing. In this Arc there will be a Shuouen Ai relationship and Suicide. I this stuff bothers you then don't read the story. Keep in mind that I'm a little new with the whole Yaoi and POV thing, so if it sucks, I'm sorry. (Also I should note that every song that I use is from the band H.I.M. Cause quiet frankly, they rock.)

Warnings: Shuouen Ai, Adult Situations, Language, Mild Angst, slight Hilde Bashing

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, H.I.M., or their song Pretending.

Note: The text in bold italics is the song lyrics

(I decided to change the song for chapter 1 from "Pretending" to "Lose You Tonight"; to me it just fit better. I'll use the song "Pretending" for Chapter 3.

Lose You Tonight

Wu-Fei's POV

Don't run away
I can't live without you
Please stay
And I learn to love you right

Duo Maxwell… I see you again out of the corner of my eyes. Your long braid, your soft lips your violet eyes sparkling. You look at me, and I begin to melt in your gaze. You have no idea what you do to me.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
I've been crying for you
Die for you all this time

I lust for you, I long for your touch. I want to feel the softness of your skin, the warmth of your lips on mine. I want to be yours and yours alone, but I know that it cannot be, for your heart belongs to another

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I ain't gonna
Lose you tonight


Hilde, your name is like poison to me. You took from me the one thing I desire, the one thing I need. You god-damn whore, I hate everything about you. I wish you would leave forever, so that I could have Duo for myself. Damn you Hilde, why did you steal him from me?

Don't run away
I never wanted to hurt you
Please stay
And I learn to treat you right

Oh god why did it have to be you? How can something so beautiful be so forbidden. Surely you must have noticed my love for you? Maybe I've been too subtle about it, if only you knew my true feelings. I want you more than anything.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I've been crying for you
Die for you all this time

You start to walk up to me and my body freezes, unsure of what to do. Maybe if I told him how I feel, it would make him forget about Hilde. Then he would be mines and nobody else's. I take a deep breath as he says hi.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I ain't gonna
Lose you tonight

I try to talk to him but my mind keeps drifting, new thoughts enter my head. What if you reject my feelings for you, I'll lose you forever. Duo… I rather be dead than not have you. Maybe I shouldn't tell you just yet. I need more time to collect my thoughts.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I've been crying for you
Die for you all this time
I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I ain't gonna
Lose you tonight

As you talk, my mind begins to cloud over. The sound of your voice is so hypnotic, so soothing, all I can do is stare. He asks me if I'm alright and my mind quickly snaps back to attention. If I don't leave now, I'll do something I'll regret later. I quickly walk away without saying goodbye.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I've been crying for you
Die for you all this time
I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I ain't gonna
Lose you tonight

He begins calling my name; I start to run faster and faster. I reach my house and quickly close the door behind me. My mind is still racing from what had happened. I know he's confused right now, I would be too. I wonder if he's beginning to suspect something, surely he must. What do I do now, I feel so ashamed. It was on the tip of my tongue, but I said nothing. I just ran away, I'm such a coward. I should have told him, but it's too late. I may have just lost Duo for good.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I've been crying for you Die for you all this time

Maybe it was never meant to be, Duo and me. Maybe this is just fates way of telling me to back off. But can I give up the one thing that brings joy into my life? Maybe I should end this obsession, maybe I should let Duo go…

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life
And I've been crying for you
Die for you all this time

OH GOD, what am I doing to myself? I cannot give up yet; I'm not going to lose him. There still must be a chance. If he rejects my feelings I'll lose him, but if I don't tell him he'll still be lost to me. Duo and I are destined for each other; I cannot give up yet.

I was waiting for you
Waiting for all my life

I've made my decision; I walk over to the phone. But before I can dial his number my hand freezes. Worry, fear, and doubt enter my mind; can I really do this? My hand tightens around the phone, I have to do it; it's now or never. I punch in the numbers and listen to the phone ring. The ringing suddenly stops, and I hear Duo's voice. I take a deep breath, no looking back, no regrets.

End