This is a one-shot inspired by the stills that have been released for episode 5x04, when Aria goes to visit Ezra's apartment. Just something that I would love to see happen :) I hope you enjoy!


The smell of the hall was all too familiar for Aria as she reached the summit of the stairs and turned left onto the corridor that was home to apartments 3C and 3B. She walked carefully and inhaled the air. With each blink, a familiar memory associated with this hallway flashed before her eyes. Their hug when she didn't know where else to go, their kisses when they forgot about theory, how she felt when he told her there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her, and her anger when she banged on the door, determined to wreck everything she could get her hands on.

But this time felt completely different. Perhaps all of the other times were due to a combination of both a need and a want to be there, but right now it was just need. Aria didn't want to be here. Not in a negative way, but she just wanted to be able to handle things on her own. After everything that had happened, she didn't want to be completely, head over heels in love with Ezra Fitz, but she was and no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't stay away.

Her guilt was consuming her. Ever since she'd pushed Shana off that stage in New York City, it was all she could think about. Everytime she slept, she dreamt of her body lying on the ground, cold and lifeless. When it went quiet, all she could hear was the sound of Emily's voice, 'she's dead.' She couldn't even think clearly without her thoughts being clouded by one single, overriding thought - I killed someone. No matter how much Aria protested with her mind, that fact echoed over and over. Somebody was dead because of her, she ended a life. Someone no longer has a daughter, someone no longer has a granddaughter, or a niece, or perhaps a sister, or a true love.. Crying had become a regular thing, but even then Aria felt foolish and guilty. Why was she crying? She was a murderer. She should be paying for what she did, but instead she was at home, with her family, with her friends. She was in the happiest of environments, although she felt anything but happy, she felt sick.

As she got nearer to the door of apartment 3B, her stomach started to churn. She'd been pacing around the block for a good half an hour, debating whether or not this was the best decision. She felt a sense of deja-vu to the time when she went to tell Ezra about The Jenna Thing, but this was much, much worse. Her palms were sweaty but her mouth was dry as she raised her fist and gently knocked three times on the hard, wooden door.

It took a few minutes before she heard noise from the other side. This was one of the reasons she had been reluctant to come tonight. Ezra was still nursing his bullet wound, so mobility wasn't his strong point right now. He'd gotten home from the New York hospital that afternoon and Aria hadn't planned to go and see him until tomorrow, so this visit would be unexpected, and at almost midnight, she didn't expect him to answer, least of all for him to be awake.

She heard footsteps and then his hands began to fiddle with the locks and chains until they abruptly stopped.

"Who is it?" his voice called out, loud, but shaky. Aria's face dropped as she realised how scared he must be. He was strong, but right now he was weak and the thought hadn't even crossed Aria's mind at how vulnerable he must be feeling.

"Um, it's Aria." She coughed a little, noticing how croaky her voice was and immediately the chains moved quicker and the door swung ajar, almost as if her name was a password. Like B26.

As the door opened, he said nothing, but greeted her with a smile and gestured for her to come in.

"I'm sorry for coming so late. I know you weren't expecting me, or anyone actually." She laughed a little and Ezra smiled again.

"No, don't worry about it. It's nice to see you.. it's always nice to see you."

Ezra looked as though he regretted that last part as he looked down and shook his head, causing Aria to smile. Once in the apartment, she allowed him to close the door, but his limp and frequent placement of his hand on his stomach made Aria cringe, and, unable to see him struggle, she walked over and instinctively wrapped an arm around his waist.

"Um, here. Let me help you."

He didn't say a word but allowed her to help him over to a chair, where he sat down, and Aria took a seat opposite him.

"Is everything okay?" Ezra looked nervous.

At this point Aria had almost forgotten why she'd come here. Just a few minutes with Ezra made everything better and distracted her from her pain. But then it all came rushing back to her as soon as he asked the question.

Aria shook her head and opened her mouth to speak. "I.."

And that was all she managed to say before she burst into tears.

"Hey, hey Aria!" Ezra forced himself up and managed to sit down beside her on the sofa, and held her in his arms. She didn't resist at all, welcoming the embrace.

"I'm sorry," she began. Ezra shushed her and continued to wrap his arms around her tiny frame.

"Aria, you're allowed to cry. It's okay."

Ezra's kind words only made Aria cry harder as she realised that this was where she belonged, with him. Combined with the burden of her huge secret, it only made her feel even worse about everything. She tried to breathe and the distance between Aria and Ezra widened slightly as she managed to compose herself.

"I've had something that I've been carrying around with me all week. I can't talk about it with the girls and there's no way I can tell my parents or Mike.."

Ezra breathed deeply, and gently placed his hand on top of Aria's, and she didn't pull away. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

Aria nodded, "that's why I'm here."


"You know that I could have done that, right?" Ezra asked as he took his coffee cup from Aria. To prepare herself to tell Ezra everything she'd been keeping locked insider her head, she needed to do something so she could think things over. Ezra had returned to his chair and Aria had made them both a drink. It was nearing 1am but it didn't seem to matter to either of them.

"I know," Aria smiled, "it wouldn't have been any good for you, though."

It was evident how much Ezra hated his current condition. He felt useless and lazy, two things of which he was the exact opposite.

"Aria, I'm fine."

"Ezra, you got shot, okay? Do you not remember that?" Her tone was playful, but serious, too. "I don't wanna risk losing you, I came too close the last time."

Her eyes lingered on Ezra's as she said the last sentence and for a moment everything else went silent. The contact of their eyes said more than words ever could and it was both silent and loud at the same time as the seconds ticked by.

Aria became conscious of this and sat down abruptly.

"Of course I remember.." he said quietly. "But I'm a grown man and I can take care of myself."

"I know that, but what kind of girlfriend -" as soon as she realised what she was saying, she stopped. "- friend would I be if I let you struggle, huh?"

Aria's cheeks were flushing pink and she desperately hoped he hadn't heard what she said but it was obvious he had. Luckily, he didn't comment on it. Instead, he took a sip of coffee, before placing his mug onto the table and looking directly at Aria.

"So.. what's wrong?"

Aria dawdled on her sip, trying to recover from her slip up by making it last longer than needed, before eventually placing her cup next to Ezra's.

"I," she could barely bring herself to utter the words. "I killed someone."

Ezra was glad he'd placed his mug on the coffee table, because he would sure as hell have to do some cleaning up of broken pottery after that statement. He was lost for words and Aria misinterpreted his shock for disgust, and immediately got up, uttering apologies and various words including "please don't tell anyone," and, "I'm so sorry."

Ezra couldn't move. It was hard to move normally, but now it was especially difficult.

"No, no, Aria wait. Please."

Aria had just secured a grip on the door handle when she heard the words and relief flooded through her; the sincerity in his tone was obvious. She paused for a moment but then turned to return to her seat, although she could barely look him in the eye. She sat down carefully on the edge of the sofa and bit her lip, not making eye contact.

"Hey, look at me." Ezra said gently as he moved closer to the edge of the chair. He extended his hands out and Aria looked towards them, slowly, before joining them with hers. Then her eyes moved higher, until they locked with his.

In that moment it dawned on her. Ezra had no idea who's life she'd taken, and he didn't know the context. She'd offered to leave but he had pulled her back and told her to stay with him, and physically comforted her. For all he knew she could be a serial killer, she could even have a knife and latex gloves in her purse, all ready to kill him next, but it didn't matter to him. All he knew was that she had killed someone, and right now, he was still the same guy, with the same attitudes towards her, as he had been five minutes before.

Aria still couldn't speak. But Ezra could, and the grip he had on Aria's hands didn't loosen.

"Tell me everything, from the start."

So she did.

She spoke of how she'd heard him tell her it was Shana on the roof, and how she'd rushed to the theater where the girls were, and how she'd found Shana holding them all at gunpoint. She told him how she grasped the rifle, and pushed the head of the weapon into Shana's skull. She recalled to him the screams and the loud 'thump' as she hit the solid ground. She told him everything, right up to Emily's voice proclaiming her dead, and Spencer's reassurance that she'd done the right thing, seconds after she'd taken the life of another.

And then she burst into tears. Again.

Ezra didn't say a word, and the expression on his face didn't alter for the whole time Aria was speaking. It was a struggle, but he got up from his chair and joined Aria on the sofa once more, and he removed his hands from hers so he could wrap his arms around her tiny frame. She sobbed and sobbed, harder and harder until she was exhausted, and the whole time Ezra held onto her body, stifling the shaking and kissing her hair.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have come here, I shouldn't have burdened you with this -"

"Aria, you could never burden me with anything." He paused as she looked up to him with big, glossy eyes. "I, I love you."

Pink flushed through her cheeks and her tears subsided as Aria said the words casually, with no hesitation.

"I love you too."

It went silent for a few minutes and Ezra didn't dare to move an inch. Aria, however, became very aware of their closeness, the ever-closing distance between them. She breathed heavily and moved away, and Ezra moved back, too. She wanted nothing more than to just grab him and kiss him and make all of the pain go away, but she had to be strong and know better. What if it was just her emotions talking? What if she woke up tomorrow in his bed and regretted even coming here in the first place? So she moved away, and for now, it was the better option.

Ezra rubbed his nose as he backed further into the couch.

"So, um, you've not told anyone else?"

Aria shook her head, the tears drying as the seconds past. "No. Well, Spencer, Hanna, Emily and Ali know, but no one else. Oh, and you too now, I guess."

Ezra nodded slowly and Aria knew the look he had on his face. He was thinking.

"Aria," he said quietly, turning and offering his hands to her once again, which she took, "I think you should keep this a secret."

Aria's whole body tensed at the word. A secret. The sound made her internally cringe. And Ezra noticed.

"Um, not even a secret, don't think of it as that. It's just, something you don't talk about. You know, like the time you tripped and fell at your Aunt's wedding? And everyone saw your -"

"Hey! I -"

"See? It's not been hard to forget that has it?"

Aria laughed a little and smiled at him, but her face drooped again as soon as his laughter stopped.

"I know that it's hard to do that, but I can be the exception. You can always talk about it with me if you need to, here, this is your safe place. Even if the girls don't want to bring it up, I don't mind. I don't care if it's 2am and you can't sleep because of it, or if you're halfway through Biology and you just need to vent. Call me, and I'll be there. Although you might need to give me a good half hour until this thing's healed up.."

He laughed, leaving her gaze for only a second as he referred to his stomach. "Okay?"

Aria's eyes were fixed on him as she breathed deeply, smiling weakly, her eyes getting damp with a few tears. Still, to this day, it amazed her how amazing he was.

"Okay."

Ezra smiled and looked down, unsure of what to say next.

"Thanks, Ezra. I, I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't have spoken to you tonight," and Aria meant every single word.

"Hey, anytime, you know that."

"So, how is it?" She pointed towards his stomach and he shrugged.

"Well I'm still here aren't I?" He laughed a little but Aria didn't find it funny. She sighed.

"It's okay to talk about it, it's only me."

Ezra sighed, and Aria saw a tear appear in his eye for perhaps the third or fourth time since they'd been together. She didn't move. Somehow, she couldn't.

"I just don't know what to do," he admitted. "I feel useless, and stupid.. How am I supposed to protect you when I can't even stand up properly?"

Tears started to slowly run down Ezra's face, and Aria felt her eyes dampen, too. And for a moment it was just the two of them in that tiny apartment, inches away from each other on the couch, fighting back the tears together.

"Come here," Aria said, leaning forward and holding onto him. "You could never be useless, and what you did was nowhere near stupid. It was brave, and wonderful, and amazing.."

She pulled away slightly and the tears had stopped for both of them.

"..and heroic, and kind.."

Ezra's eyes were locked with hers as he continued to receive her praises. They were close, literally, closer than they had been all night. And it felt right.

"..and.."

Aria didn't get the time to continue, although she wasn't quite sure what she would have said next as she was hypnotized by Ezra's gaze, because she was stopped by Ezra's lips on hers. She didn't stop it, and she didn't even want to. She kissed him back fiercely, with such a passion that was the result of craving this moment for so long. They hadn't kissed in weeks, and they hadn't kissed like this, in months. Aria's arms extended around Ezra's back and she did most of the movement, extremely aware of Ezra's bullet wound. Ezra's hands roamed around her hair and she smiled into the kiss, wishing she could bottle this moment and drink it, or use it as perfume, or bathe in it, because she couldn't think of anything more perfect to possess.

A minute or so into the kiss, Ezra pulled back, muttering apologies.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, I understand that you don't want to -" he spoke quickly but Aria cut him off,

"I want this. I want you, I need you. I need us."

Aria hadn't moved an inch since he pulled away, so with a smile he attacked her lips again, and all of their pain was forgotten. They had found relief in each other, and they were never going to lose it again.


Yay for impromptu one-shots! I hope you all liked it and please review if you did, I really appreciate it :) Don't forget that you can follow me on twitter 'adoringezria' !