Purple
By Sofri
A/n: Written on a prompt from Before the Sun Sets. Crack!
Disclaimer: Not mine.
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They were very alike.
They were aloof and cold.
Though one was a leader
and one did what he was told.
Both were fighters
with enemies they'd sworn to destroy
one wanted a heart,
the other, a toy.
And they'd never really met
Each from a different place
The one-winged angel
And the berserk scar-face
So how did they go
From strangers to lovers?
From fighting two separate enemies
To fighting each other (under covers)?
Well it turned out there was
A singular thing
That could take them from indifference
To kisses and rings
It's a simple thing—a color
We all know quite well
Most call it "purple"
And its story I'll tell.
There once were two girls
A nymph so sadistic
And a teenager ninja
With a brain quite simplistic.
Larxene met Yuffie
At the scene of a fight
Both Saïx and Sephiroth
Also present that night.
And while Nymph and Ninja
Were locked in a battle
The young, talkative Yuffie
Soon began to prattle.
"Hey, lady, do you see
That guy with hair so blue?
Well I just got an idea
And I need help from you.
See, I fought him earlier
And he reminds me of a man I know
Sephiroth, that guy over there
With wings above and below.
I thought to myself
They'd make a marvelous pair"
Larxene opened her mouth
To say "Au contraire"
But soon realized
The ninja girl had a point
And decided that Yuffie
As her partner she'd appoint.
So two weeks later
Ninja and Nymph were fast friends
And their plan to set two men up
Was approaching its end
So one day in the darkness
Of that world that never-has-been
The Luna Diviner awoke
To a new shade of skin.
Yes, his skin was bright purple
The brightest he'd ever seen
And he soon knew it was a prank
Courtesy of Larxene.
So he stormed to her room
With a feral growl
And she opened her door
And with laughter did howl.
"Poor-Saixy poo,"
She taunted with an evil grin
And with his teeth
He went for her chin.
Fearing the berserker's wrath
The nymph backed up a bit
And said, "Calm down, VII
I know the remedy for it.
Go to a place called Radiant Garden
We fought there last week
And a magician named Merlin
Is the one you should seek."
So without further ado
Off Saïx teleported
And the other half of this story
Still needs reported.
The angel of one wing
Had awoken early, too
And soon discovered his precious wing
Was an elegant violet hue.
So he ran from his bed
(In the dark where he dwelt)
And soon reached Radiant Garden
An unfortunate ninja to smelt.
But she grinned innocently
And said "There's nothing I can do
You must go to Merlin,
It's the only thing for you."
So he ran to the door
Of the ancient magician
Thinking he'd get his wing fixed
And then call a mortician
(For he planned to kill Yuffie,
Once this all was through
How his plans never came to fruition
I shall now reveal to you)
For just as he entered
The magician's door
He ran straight into Saïx
Both were knocked to the floor.
And when they sat up, rubbing heads
And for the first time locked eyes
Both Angel and Diviner
Met an unexpected surprise.
They felt a connection
Tingling through their spine
And their sense and reason
Quickly began to decline
And soon our two anti-heroes
(Who'd only just met)
Were kissing on the floor
Their surroundings they did forget
And the minute they kissed
The purple they'd both been dyed
Disappeared just like magic
For the pranksters were satisfied.
Ninja and Nymph
Had been successful to the extreme
And brought together a couple
That was any fangirl's dream.
And so ends our tale
Of a unique villain romance
The moral is: don't trust Yuffie
And give purple a chance!
